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*spots an out of place puddle of pee at the scene* "Boss, I think that's pee." "What're you gonna do about it Ventura, who cares, it's piss for Christ's sake!" *carefully places a sample strip into the puddle, gives it a sniff* "This isn't the first time a puddle of pee has given me the lead, boss." "You're sick, Ventura." *gives it a taste* "Oh yeah. Someone here had been drinking cognac. I'd know the smell of cognac piss anywhere, boss." "Get the toxicology report on these bodies ASAP! And the transaction logs of every cognac bar within 50 miles!" *ducks around corner, sighs of relief, and takes a swig from his flask of Courvoisier XO*
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Apr 10, 2021 00:34
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 23:36 |
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sssssssssssssssssssssmokin
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Apr 10, 2021 00:38
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"I've heard of a PI, but this is ridiculous!"
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Apr 10, 2021 00:49
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pO9AuaNH4lE
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Apr 10, 2021 00:53
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*long uncomfortable scene of a horny gorilla golden showering an old man while In The Jungle plays*
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Apr 10, 2021 00:59
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ace struggling to wriggle into a rhino's urethra.gif
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Apr 10, 2021 01:05
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I'm trump's secret body guard. Checkmate thread.
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Apr 10, 2021 01:08
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Bumblepee tuna
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Apr 10, 2021 01:15
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*sleeps with transwoman then spends an hour vomiting and peeing and vomiting pee everywhere*
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Apr 10, 2021 01:40
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"To clarify I did NOT vomit because I am transphobic, nobody knew that was a thing in the 90s and also Finkle wasn't technically trans because-"
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Apr 10, 2021 02:01
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EINHORN IS TINKLE TINKLE IS EINHORN
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Apr 10, 2021 02:02
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ElectricSheep posted:EINHORN IS TINKLE
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Apr 10, 2021 02:14
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Wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?!!?
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Apr 10, 2021 02:27
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*pees in Courtney Cox’s mouth*
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Apr 10, 2021 03:00
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I’m watching Ace Ventura 2 on tv right now
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Apr 10, 2021 03:12
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Excuse me your pee in your balls is showing
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Apr 10, 2021 03:13
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"may I rear end you a question?? i have to read the book for you and I will not be the first person to do anything for the lord God give you a lot of piss" -aids venture pet dick
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Apr 10, 2021 04:02
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Instead of waking up with a bunch of animals in his apartment it's varying sizes of jars full of pee, some of which he knocks over as he sings about pee and makes goofy faces. His hair is different too, it's wet and greasy and sticks to his forehead
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Apr 10, 2021 04:37
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edit: thought this was the peat bog detective thread, sorry ok
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Apr 10, 2021 05:27
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im rear end ventura piss detective i dont like animals i just like being a horses toilet (everything about it)
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Apr 10, 2021 05:39
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My god, it's a poo with consistency of pee! We'll never solve this case, all hope is lost!
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Apr 10, 2021 05:45
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Hey Thanks for the free pissing~
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Apr 10, 2021 05:51
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Colonel Cancer posted:My god, it's a poo with consistency of pee! We'll never solve this case, all hope is lost! Hmmm, looking at the database the only time this has been seen, the poo with pee consistency, is a serial murder cold case from Wisconsin. Has the killer come to Florida or is this a copycat peeshitter?
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Apr 10, 2021 14:48
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(Laps up all the evidence.) Whoops! (Licks lips.)
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Apr 10, 2021 17:06
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BigBadSteve posted:(Laps up all the evidence.) Oh Ace, urine trouble now.
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Apr 10, 2021 17:16
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BigBadSteve posted:(Laps up all the evidence.) Ace, the DA is trying to get a hold of you, seems like you really got his goat this time.
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Apr 10, 2021 17:38
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*sniffs dramatically* Smells like urine in a lot of trouble mister.
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Apr 11, 2021 11:05
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this piss tastes awful
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Apr 11, 2021 12:05
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*the animal reveal scene but instead of various fauna it's pee bottles*
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Apr 11, 2021 18:55
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*fills dolphin tank with bright orange smelly piss*
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Apr 11, 2021 19:00
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Why dontcha Tone Loc at my balls! They're full of piss!
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Apr 11, 2021 19:03
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B4E7_XW3L84
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Apr 11, 2021 22:20
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One of my dogs is ancient and blind and sometimes he just laughs to himself and says "gently caress it" and pees in the kitchen rather than going out in the snow/rain and frankly I don't blame him even though it's a pain in my rear end.
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Apr 11, 2021 23:00
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I’M PISSING MY PANTS!!!
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Apr 12, 2021 23:25
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i have awful bed sores
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Apr 13, 2021 00:17
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Suhhhhh-moking! *pisses all over the floor*
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Apr 13, 2021 00:19
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Ace Ventura used my rear end like that rhino in the film it was wonderful and I've never recovered
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Apr 13, 2021 00:25
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Big Beef City posted:Ace Ventura used my rear end like that rhino in the film it was wonderful and I've never recovered what film
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Apr 13, 2021 00:59
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Nefarious 2.0 posted:what film Ace Ventura: Beef Detective
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Apr 13, 2021 01:02
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 23:36 |
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Nefarious 2.0 posted:what film The empire strikes back
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Apr 13, 2021 01:26
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