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Who What Now posted:I shall die as my father and his father and his father's father died: by shitteing mineself until I am naught but an empty and dried husk You think knights got hemorrhoids ?
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Apr 22, 2021 23:41
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Verily!
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Apr 22, 2021 23:49
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im a chivalrous knight of chode ama about my short fat tenderness
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Apr 22, 2021 23:51
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I have a terrific case of the shits, cut a hole in the seat of my plate armor so I may defecate freely whilst on the battlefield.
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Apr 22, 2021 23:53
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Bye mine owne Eyes! Looketh verily upon the Balls of yon Hogge and wondereth upon their Incredible Syze!
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Apr 23, 2021 00:00
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Thine father art gay, what sooth?
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Apr 23, 2021 01:02
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Hark! It is I, thee one who crushes heathens underfoot! My zeal without question, thee Bishop informeth me thusly that thy obsession with crushing heathens underfoot springs from a malady of the spirit and wits which is shared among court jesters. Should thou feel a similar compulsion of thy heart to stay thy spirit upon the subject, thou may find themselfs my brother and kin in suffering thusly of the malady.
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Apr 23, 2021 01:46
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Behold! A manne, who doth part his owne fundament.
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Apr 23, 2021 01:51
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Great with eld, ye Canyone Grand is truly proof of God's greatness. Tis a goodly way down.
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Apr 23, 2021 02:12
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Forsooth I have fallen down in the mud. There is naught for it but to lie here until I am crushed by another be-armored corpse, or mortally pierced by a longbowman.
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Apr 23, 2021 02:39
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Arquebusiers. poo poo.
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Apr 23, 2021 02:46
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A shameful Moor.
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Apr 23, 2021 02:46
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:Bye mine owne Eyes! Looketh verily upon the Balls of yon Hogge and wondereth upon their Incredible Syze! *Merlin casts Reduce Balls*
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Apr 23, 2021 03:00
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When thou were jousting, drinking with the ladies and learning the blade,i mastered the tome 
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Apr 23, 2021 03:07
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*jousts the poo poo out of everything*
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Apr 23, 2021 03:08
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sudonim posted:*Merlin casts Reduce Balls* *stabs u*
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Apr 23, 2021 03:58
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Behold! I am dragonstomper58
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Apr 23, 2021 03:59
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Prithee, what fate shall befall me if I am one whom choses to lie withe menne also?
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Apr 23, 2021 04:10
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brb just gonna go be an absentee king and husband for years so I can bum around the country lookin for a cup jesus bled into or some poo poo which is totally important
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Apr 23, 2021 04:59
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:*stabs u* *jousts u*
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Apr 23, 2021 05:00
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*Is a hussite handgunner from the 15th century* lmao knights are fuckin NOTHING rear end losers lmao *shoots ten rich rear end in a top hat knights and rejects the catholic faith*
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Apr 23, 2021 08:31
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When I was in uni we sometimes smoked weed with a dude who held a lofty position of Chancellor of a LARPer club called Order of the Dragon or something. He was the second in command, with his own seal and stuff, his only superior was the Magister. Turns out LARP club is a great place to get high because everything is hilarious. Magister hated us. There were princesses too! Girls like to sew their dresses and pretend to be princesses, boys liked to dress up in armor and smack each other with swords. There were also some odd characters such as a loving "priest" whos job was to bless everyone and a bard with cringe-worthy entertainment (medieval songs on acoustic guitar) which he performed hoping for free weed and beers.
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Apr 23, 2021 09:35
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sudonim posted:*Merlin casts Reduce Balls* *Watery Tart casts Flounce*
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Apr 23, 2021 09:49
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Does thou even posta de donna destra?
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Apr 23, 2021 10:42
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What buffoonery is this?! Virtueless knave, one must smoketh their Meate withe Woode, not withe thine corded Majick!
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Apr 23, 2021 12:45
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 I think that one day, there will be a new Empire, like Rome, and they'll conquer the world.*fellow knights around the fire nod sagely* And they'll have ships as fast as arrows.*sage nods* And they'll go to China, and tame dragons, and ride them like horses.*sage nods* And they'll send messages from land to land in minutes, carried using mighty engines.*sage nods* And in those messages they'll just absolutely wreck us, total no-mercy pisstake, like everything we ever did and cared about and died for is a joke. Enough hashish for tonight John.
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Apr 23, 2021 13:43
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Sekenr posted:When I was in uni we sometimes smoked weed with a dude who held a lofty position of Chancellor of a LARPer club called Order of the Dragon or something. He was the second in command, with his own seal and stuff, his only superior was the Magister. Turns out LARP club is a great place to get high because everything is hilarious. Magister hated us. There were princesses too! Girls like to sew their dresses and pretend to be princesses, boys liked to dress up in armor and smack each other with swords. There were also some odd characters such as a loving "priest" whos job was to bless everyone and a bard with cringe-worthy entertainment (medieval songs on acoustic guitar) which he performed hoping for free weed and beers. This sounds incredibly less cool the more you describe it, which seems to be the opposite of your intent.
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Apr 23, 2021 13:45
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Kills a peasant just for fun
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Apr 23, 2021 14:15
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Squire, make thyself into a stepping stool so that I may mount mine horse. Shut thy mouth, knave! 'Tis what the application meant by "potential for upward mobility"!
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Apr 23, 2021 14:30
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Pissing in a bottle so these 30,000  get delivered on time.
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Apr 23, 2021 14:33
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Big Beef City posted:Prithee, what fate shall befall me if I am one whom choses to lie withe menne also? If you lieth with menne as ye doo with womenne thou shalt be struck down by ye olde Jesus the Christened One. So doth not fucketh a manne within his pussye
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Apr 23, 2021 14:45
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mineth codpiece overfloweth
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Apr 23, 2021 15:01
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Mozi posted:mineth codpiece overfloweth ‘Tis because thou art fat! LOLeth
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Apr 23, 2021 15:07
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cleanfe this fread with vapours; banne the Original Pofter
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Apr 23, 2021 15:19
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Who What Now posted:If you lieth with menne as ye doo with womenne thou shalt be struck down by ye olde Jesus the Christened One. So doth not fucketh a manne within his pussye *Bussye
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Apr 23, 2021 15:22
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:*Bussye tis becomming rather hotte hither, doff all thine robes
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Apr 23, 2021 16:18
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:‘Tis because thou art fat! LOLeth shoveth it up thine hindpiece, thy rascal
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Apr 23, 2021 16:20
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Eache morninge I vigorously strike my scribe with an open gauntelet and he begins readinge to me the Wonderful and Variede Chronicles of One Sir Riddicke.
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Apr 23, 2021 16:22
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sinky posted:Pissing in a bottle so these 30,000 Mine Kingdome for a single Luste Bumme in whiche too Burye mine Lance and Thruste with Vigor until it overfloweth with mine Seede!
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Apr 23, 2021 16:24
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I hath carried the burden of thif gutenberg preff for many milef for milady
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Apr 23, 2021 16:28
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