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noted ruby dipshit dhh and jason fried posted some dumb poo poo today about how the real problem in the software world is your employees getting mad about not posting 'black lives matter' on the company blog (paraphrased, read more - https://world.hey.com/jason/changes-at-basecamp-7f32afc5) if you could run a company, what would your business advice be?
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Apr 27, 2021 01:16
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Pay me 211 million dollars each year
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Apr 27, 2021 01:19
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You might know of the Peter Principle, a concept in management developed by Laurence J. Peter, which observes that people in a hierarchy tend to rise to their "level of incompetence": employees are promoted based on their success in previous jobs until they reach a level at which they are no longer competent, as skills in one job do not necessarily translate to another. I would propose to do reverse-stack ranking as a measure to prevent and defeat it once and for all. Effectively, the Peter Principle takes your best employees and removes them from where they are most valuable. Reverse-stackranking is a practice by which you take your least competent employees, and promote them as fast as possible. This removes them from a position where they are actively doing harm, leaving room for your most competent people to do their work. Furthermore, most solid organizational advice has to do with delegation, and pushing decision-making to people with the context to implement it, usually at the leaves of the organizational tree. Reverse-stackranking implies that the only people competent enough to make decisions are already at the leaves and therefore naturally fosters contextful and aware decision-making.
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Apr 27, 2021 01:20
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shut it down and give the money back to the shareholders. but make sure the company is employee owned first. thanks
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Apr 27, 2021 01:22
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kitten emergency posted:if you could run a company, what would your business advice be? try turning the heat in the bathroom up real high for a "hot yoga" experience while taking a dump
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Apr 27, 2021 01:26
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keep goats around for a "goat yoga" experience
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Apr 27, 2021 01:27
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my business advice: its a sign of a successful company that your sr sysadmin rips a pax vape in the server room every day after lunch
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Apr 27, 2021 01:28
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kitten emergency posted:(paraphrased,
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Apr 27, 2021 01:29
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conduct employee reviews' peer evaluations by just posting @reviewedemployee in the main channel and looking for positve and negative reactji under your post
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Apr 27, 2021 01:29
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MononcQc posted:conduct employee reviews' peer evaluations by just posting @reviewedemployee in the main channel and looking for positve and negative reactji under your post raises granted based on "Other Employees React to Bob" reaction videos on youtube
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Apr 27, 2021 01:33
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[shot of code being typed] oh nice i recognize this, this is the file storage code [switches to shot of Bob typing] [frowning face] ah man, this guy
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Apr 27, 2021 01:35
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interviews are finalized with whiteboard coding exercises, but as interviewees solve problems you just do more and more of them in a never ending gauntlet. If you made it to the whiteboard phase you're hired, but the amount of seniority you are granted depends about how early you complain that this bullshit is making you lose time. The longer you go without complaining, the lower your grade on the engineering ladder.
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Apr 27, 2021 01:36
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book interviews at competitors on your work calendar and claim it's for 'research'
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Apr 27, 2021 01:36
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just hire someone else to do all the ceo stuff
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Apr 27, 2021 01:40
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conduct all your work in-office without computers as to limit the amount of subpoenable material you generate
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Apr 27, 2021 01:41
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quarterly employee reviews are done via whiteboard coding challenges
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Apr 27, 2021 01:59
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jira, rally and bugzilla are all trash. Put half your engineers on a project to make your own internal ticketing system. That'll show 'em.
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Apr 27, 2021 02:02
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To encourage proper planning around your engineers' folks presence for on-call rotation and not assuming they are part of project work, they shall be moved away from their usual team during on-call periods. We suggest doing this by creating visual reminders (such as a brightly-colored hat or outfit) and moving them to a hotdesking area on a floor above from their usual teams. Whenever an outage happens and requires their intervention, make it visible by sounding a siren and having them slide down a fireman's pole to reach their workstations.
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Apr 27, 2021 02:05
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Employees should have the right to choose between a sitting or a standing desk, or a desk that does both. Employees who are on a Personal Improvement Plan (PIP) shall however be assigned a kneeling desk so that they can think about what it is they're doing wrong here.
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Apr 27, 2021 02:06
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always be on the lookout for efforts at organizing by your workers. If you see anyone advocating for union types, shut their project down.
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Apr 27, 2021 02:08
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all business decisions can only be made after consulting a horoscopeTech Horoscope posted:The approaching full cloud in your feed means it’s unlikely you will see eye-to-eye with a coworker or team member today. It doesn’t have to put a strain on your relationship though. It isn’t a life-or-death disagreement, so keep smiling. Captain Foo fucked around with this message at 02:26 on Apr 27, 2021 |
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Apr 27, 2021 02:21
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Most consultants you will hire to fix your organization will listen to your line workers, then report what they have been trying to tell you for years, and you will listen because the advice will be external and more worth listening to in your ears. You can preempt this by instead hiring a full-time employee whose role is to repeat what your line workers have been trying to tell you for years for cheaper than you'd pay a consultant when you amortize costs over time.
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Apr 27, 2021 02:21
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make everyone in the company rotate jobs every month. that way everybody gets experience with everything
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Apr 27, 2021 02:24
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a new and exciting agile framework every quarter. book clubs are twice a week and mandatory
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Apr 27, 2021 03:21
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Ansible Adams posted:my business advice: its a sign of a successful company that your sr sysadmin rips a pax vape in the server room every day after lunch
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Apr 27, 2021 03:28
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bleed it dry and when poo poo starts to fall apart lean real heavily on the employees to pick up the slack with promises of profit sharing, then never return from a vacation with all the money
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Apr 27, 2021 03:57
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ask your reports which Linux distro they prefer for production systems, and fire all the ones who answer with gentoo, arch, fedora, or Ubuntu. any who answer windows server should be immediately promoted to CIO and put in charge of migrating your on-prem exchange server to gmail, whether or not you currently have an on-prem exchange server
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Apr 27, 2021 05:18
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probably something without computers
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Apr 27, 2021 05:28
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Cat Face Joe posted:probably something without computers Pneumatics are the next big thing
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Apr 27, 2021 07:00
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process will increase until schedule slippage improves
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Apr 27, 2021 07:17
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the more risky a release the higher up in the management chain you have ot go to get it approved, ensuring that the risk involved in making a change is inversely proportional to the system knowledge of the person approving
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Apr 27, 2021 12:51
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Zaxxon posted:Pneumatics are the next big thing as a child i dreamed of a house of pneumatic tubes to, i don’t know, send poo poo between rooms as a man i still want this
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Apr 27, 2021 13:02
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my homie dhall posted:the more risky a release the higher up in the management chain you have ot go to get it approved, ensuring that the risk involved in making a change is inversely proportional to the system knowledge of the person approving i think this thread is supposed to be jokes, not simply describing reality
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Apr 27, 2021 13:03
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The human brain is a fantastic signal processing device which our computers can barely approach in terms of insight generation. It is always on -- even when sleeping -- and can provide strong signals even as you're not focusing on them! As such, you should learn to harness the power of intuition, which reflects deeply rooted expertise, in any one of the people on your team. If you find yourself in a heated discussion about what to do, with strong arguments and opinions on either side, learn to defer to the power of intuition. If someone calls for a "gut check", this means they have a strong gut feeling -- intuition! -- that they are right. Once a gut check is called, the debate is considered settled.
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Apr 27, 2021 13:11
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gently caress I just realized I got this one from google https://twitter.com/btaylor/status/1099370129089941505 https://twitter.com/btaylor/status/1099370166922563584 https://twitter.com/btaylor/status/1099370170382831616 https://twitter.com/btaylor/status/1099370172916195328
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Apr 27, 2021 13:20
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Didn't Bing name their isometric aerial/satellite imagery mode "Birds-Eye View"?
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Apr 27, 2021 14:06
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MononcQc posted:Whenever an outage happens and requires their intervention, make it visible by sounding a siren and having them slide down a fireman's pole to reach their workstations. just for the fire pole experience, im down with this.
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Apr 28, 2021 00:18
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not sure it this counts but i once directed one of our teams to replace all http error messages in the client with “there’s a problem with your internet connection” and it reduced helpdesk calls by like 90% overnight
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Apr 28, 2021 00:20
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my homie dhall posted:the more risky a release the higher up in the management chain you have ot go to get it approved, ensuring that the risk involved in making a change is inversely proportional to the system knowledge of the person approving idk, this sounds pretty status quo to me? why not just have the new guy make the final decision if he chooses correctly, great, if he chooses poorly fire him immediately.
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Apr 28, 2021 00:21
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CRIP EATIN BREAD posted:not sure it this counts but i once directed one of our teams to replace all http error messages in the client with “there’s a problem with your internet connection” and it reduced helpdesk calls by like 90% overnight funny but also sucks
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Apr 28, 2021 00:28
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