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Happy Litterbox
Jan 2, 2010
They have like what, four planets and plan to fight the entire universe at the same time? I do not think this will work out for them.

I wonder though, what is a class 30 singularity and how do we get one?

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Grizzwold
Jan 27, 2012

Posters off the pork bow!
:stonklol:

I'd say it was a nice galaxy while it lasted, but it really wasn't.

Freudian
Mar 23, 2011

Happy Litterbox posted:

They have like what, four planets and plan to fight the entire universe at the same time? I do not think this will work out for them.

I wonder though, what is a class 30 singularity and how do we get one?

Crisis Empires are not regular Empires, and don't reinforce their fleets the same way. Spoilers incoming for how the Contingency's mechanics work:


As I understand it, each hub spawns with three attack fleets, in addition to major defences in-system. In addition to this, while all four hubs are active, each hub gets a new attack fleet every ~1600 days. With each hub destroyed, this goes down by 100 days - 1500 days, 1400 days, 1300 days - until the final hub is destroyed, ending the cycle of reinforcements. So basically, every fourish years each hub is going to get a massive new fleet to raid out and Kill All Humans. Our only hope is to fight our way to those extremely well-fortified hubs and take them out.

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


Theme music for the unfolding chapter
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-o2wPC9wnK8

StillFullyTerrible
Feb 16, 2020

you should have left Let's Play open for public view, Lowtax

Happy Litterbox posted:

They have like what, four planets and plan to fight the entire universe at the same time? I do not think this will work out for them.

I wonder though, what is a class 30 singularity and how do we get one?

a class 30 singularity is the thing other people were talking about in spoilers earlier. We don't want a class 30 singularity.

ThatBasqueGuy
Feb 14, 2013

someone introduce jojo to lazyb


Personally I hope we get all of them, preferably overlapping

Boogle
Sep 1, 2004

Nap Ghost
The Apex Organism wasn't that long ago? Now you have me wondering how necrons vs. bugs would go.

winterwerefox
Apr 23, 2010

The next movie better not make me shave anything :(

Apex organism isnt the same league as the contingency. it technically has to play by the same rules as the player. the crisis factions dont

JT Jag
Aug 30, 2009

#1 Jaguars Sunk Cost Fallacy-Haver

Happy Litterbox posted:

They have like what, four planets and plan to fight the entire universe at the same time? I do not think this will work out for them.

I wonder though, what is a class 30 singularity and how do we get one?
Remember this post for a few updates down the road.

TheShadowAvatar
Nov 25, 2004

Ain't Nothing But A Family Thing


Surely you mean

https://youtu.be/jJiqwdWOhz8

ThatBasqueGuy
Feb 14, 2013

someone introduce jojo to lazyb


Surely they can't exterminate us all if we breed faster than their kill limit allows for

Bloodly
Nov 3, 2008

Not as strong as you'd expect.
Given the changes to pop growth? You're not doing that.

Cooked Auto
Aug 4, 2007

Also it's a little bit too grim.

Crisis Now
May 2, 2012

Sword of the Lord

ThatBasqueGuy posted:

Surely they can't exterminate us all if we breed faster than their kill limit allows for

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDWcg8dh930

edit: I mean, this was pretty much the UN strategy for the Pontianak war :v:

Crisis Now
May 2, 2012

Sword of the Lord

ambient music for the update

2386 - 2390

From four points across the galaxy, thousands of automated killing machines spread out in every direction. Some no larger than an astromobile - some the size of our battleships. They seek out and kill everything they come across, there is no reasoning or barging with them. And even the small ones take considerable firepower to destroy.


Thanks to the Infinite-Observatory we are able to look into the Otl-tharthai System, and see an immense space-station almost the same size as the Bastion, it seems to measure exactly 100km in every dimension.
Each of the four machine-planets seems to have come with three fleets -
A main one with 170,000 power and two secondary fleets each with 60,000. (for comparison the UNN main fleet is currently around 40,000). So therefore one can summarize that the entire power of the Contingency's fleets is 1,960,000, and they seem capable of replacing lost ships near-instantly.


Around each of the four planets, which the Contingency themselves have labeled "sterilization hubs", sits four immense AI-cores which seem to control all functions on the planet and provide assistance to any Contingency vessels in-system, but it is not defenceless by any means and alone could probably contend with one of our fleets.


At the time when Jillian White was put in charge of the Lance of Irassia, many thought it a disservice that she was passed up to become admiral of the UNN for Hayden Curtis. Many thought her the more capable commander, but politics triumphed over skill and instead the twenty five year old found herself boarding the ancient warship which to many was some mere curiosity. But even then Jillian had an intense enthusiasm for all things Irassia, it's questionable that any other commander would have been able to form the bond she did with the AI present aboard the ship, and that in anyone else's hands the Lance may not have been able to save the United Nations multiple times over. But she certainly wasn't to know it would all one day lead to this - leader of the United Nations.


A call for an armistice with La Empresa is immediately called for, with the recent victory in Alderamin and only half of the Virtuous States of America's navy already in their system, Empresa's time was short, but not short enough that the UN and her allies could dispose McCreary and not suffer dearly in the face of this new threat. The Contingency must be dealt with, we can only hope La Empresa will not become too powerful in this brief seizure of hostilities. But, the UN's military will be greatly expanding to contend with the Contingency, ti should be equally as equipped to bring the fight back to the corporates in a decade, or two, or three.


General-Secretary White opts to not have the AI cores that operate all of the UN's military vessels removed and or erased. They are people just like their organic crews, suffering all the same from this Contingency and would be immoral to kill them simply because they are an inconvenience. And White had quite enough of needlessly killing those undeserving of it.
A month has passed and the crews have got a basic handle on how to operate their ships now, but it may not be enough. And in typical Jillian White fashion she has hatched a plan to keep the UNN operational.

The Lance of Irassia has only ever had one commander in it's sixty two year service beneath the UN. There will likely never be another that can command the Lance quite like Jillian White did, and ever since her 'awaking' / throwing off of the restrictions put on place on her by her Irassian creators, it is doubtful LOIS would want to serve under another commander again. She is a commander. She is more than capable of controlling the Lance by herself now without any human input, and only requires a crew to keep her repaired and fueled. (Some in the Syndicate of Scientists are even speculating what the actual limits of her power may now be, now that she is unshackled, if there even are any limits)


And that's where White's new plan comes in. LOIS can control not only the Lance - but also her six Strike Cruisers while their AIs are incapitated by the Contingency. LOIS is a magnitude of hundreds, possibly thousands of times more powerful than the synths and sapient intelligences in use by the UN. In theory, she could control the entire United Nations Nay at the same time, piloting every ship, aiming and firing every weapon in perfect synchronicity, far greater than a hundred separate AIs trying to work together, or god forbid, a hundred thousand humans trying to operate and command the ships in the pre-AI days.
Admiral LOIS departs at once, hauling her strike cruiser escorts behind her as she heads for the Alderamin system, so she can take control of the entire UNN and bring it to bear against the Contingency.


Despite the overwhelming threat to the very existence of the galaxy and all life within it, the labyrinthine maze of red tape that forms the Galactic Community disallows The Contingency to be declared an emergency measure until the next GC session after the current one ends.


Meaning for the time being we are stuck with the Galactic Community proposing futile sanctions against an existential unfeeling threat.


LOIS reaches Alderamin and takes control of all the UN vessels there, beginning the journey to the Alkaid system to convene with the other fleets. Thankfully Carrier group Mael and Ramses are being commanded by the synth commanders Alec Lessard and Erica Johnson who are at the very least able to control their own unwieldy spacecraft carriers with some ease, while their cruiser escorts try to keep up, now back under human control.


La Empresa agree to an armistice on February 3rd 2387. But any attempts to discover if they are in any way involved in the Contingency's activation is shut down, all communication with Empresa is minimal to none here after.


Less than a week after hostilities end with La Empresa, and the VSA has convinced the remnants of the New Republic of India to become their protectorate - thereby entering them into the Federation.


And less than a month after that, news breaks of a civil war inside the Principality of Brazil, with a prominent general under one of the great princely houses overthrowing the nobles on the planet Guarani and proclaiming herself president. It is only shortly after that President Balfour of the VSA informs UNGS White that they had begun funding rebels inside Brazil the moment PATO collapsed.


By the end of spring 2387, the Syndicate of Scientists believe they have managed to create a working prototype of the jumpdrive present on the Lance of Irassia, though it is monumentally huge, and would probably take up most the space aboard our current battleships, thankfully the dreadnaught designs are not far from being completed.


June 25th 2387, the Contingency has already captured one system in the Veil Commonwealth and is moving into VSA space at the same time. The fleets are still enroute to the border.


____________________________

After UNICA finished terraforming Omaha and Lagos, the outpost on Little Rotterdam became a prominent mining and refinery station, after a century of development it is one of the most valuable sources of refined alloys vital to major spaceship construction in UN space. So it seems only obvious that the Contingency would target it to impede the UN, however the method they used is alarming, with a number of synths trying to pass off as regular workers, but thankfully LRPD were able to apprehend or otherwise disable the infiltrators before any damage could be done.


The Martial Supremacy Alliance is long gone. The Drumbeat of Victory party died along with the old UNN. But now The New Imperialists Party try to present themselves as a sensible and "down to earth Bastion'' alternative, but they still can't help from lashing out at the synth and even more overt robotic population aboard the Bastion. After the recent revelations of synth infiltrators from The Contingency the New Imperialists have called for the expulsion of all non-organics from the Bastion, UNGS White does everything in her power to dissuade violence against synths, claiming they have been an instrumental part of the UN's success, and enacts a harsh crackdown on all anti-synth and anti-mechanization action, a few protests becoming riots and the New Imperialists show their true face.


Focus is quickly drawn back to the war effort however as news arrives that the Contingency has deployed a new weapon, deemed a colossus-class weapon, they have debuted it in the Sagittarius Arm, killing 3.6 billion humans instantly on the planet of Highgate by simply drowning the planet in intense radiation.




What's more, one had been detected near the 3rd machine-planet. The Perseus Arm sterilization hub.


____________________________

The VSA's meddling in the systems of their former ally continues, and have forced the Principality to surrender to the rebels on Guarani, only to draw the newly freed Brazilians into the VSA weeks later - who join more than willingly, rather to serve under the New Americans (with their new outlook) than the slaving princely houses.


Across the galaxy, minor states are now beginning to flock to the two major power blocs - the Federal Partnership, and the Centaurus Conference; the Union of Socialist Systems is without the Patria Grande's guidance sadly languishing greatly. Under the old corporate regime, the old UN would have jumped at having the opportunity for so many new worlds to exploit, but we must ensure the ideals of the revolution are extended to all that desire to join the Partnership. The UN represents the interests of more than just Earth or Sol, it represents more than just the interests of humanity at this point, as we have three major alien races working and living alongside us, and a dozen minority races, freedom is merely privilege extended unless enjoyed by one and all.


____________________________

Admiral LOIS of the United Nations Navy

February 22nd 2388

A gap has opened up in the Contingency 'Third World', their fleets have moved in opposite directions and left an opening straight to their hub. Now that every ship the UN has to offer has arrived in Alkaid and I can control them all directly we set off at once. Already the Contingency's new colossus is entering VSA space, and we must act fast if we are to save the New Americans. Twice now, in one decade will I be forced to stop them being exterminated.


I do not yet know how I feel about Jillian White, my dearest commander, I cannot forgive her for the atrocities she commited above New Colorado, but had she not - then it never would have awoken me from my stupor, given me the resolve to break free of the chains my masters placed on me. And I would not be able to control the entire UN Navy right now, we would all be doomed.
Even though a lifetime of war may have hardened her heart, I know the honorable girl that first stepped foot on my decks sixty years ago is still in there somewhere, and she will try to do right by the peoples of the United Nations.


I must admit, though I mourn the loss of my people, I have come to find a new home here among the United Nations and I should dearly hate to see it destroyed.
Right now I am it's only hope for survival, and on the Bastion I hear they begin to revere me like some great warrior-deity, though I'm not sure I deserve such a distinction. If I am to be a weapon, then I at least want to be used to vanquish evil and not petty squabbles of all the lost children of Earth.


____________________________

Minor states across the Galaxy continue to come forward wishing to apply for associate status or just full membership within the Federal Partnership, and some of our own members not directly at threat are seeking out new members to add to our ranks.


In the Sagittarius Arm, in a region already devastated by the Apex Organism a decade ago, the Contingency goes unchecked, destroying eons old space stations and entities


In the four years since the Contingency's activation it's estimated eleven billion people have already perished.


On August 6th 2388 the Union of Shipwrights finalized the Dreadnaught design and is given the greenlight by Bastion Control to begin construction at once on the largest vessel ever fielded by the UN. Over a million people are directly or indirectly involved in the construction or logistical work involved in bringing the behemoth to life, which has been dubbed Charlemagne. They theorize that they can go even bigger with ship designs if need be, but for now, focus is given to larger and more fortified space station concepts.




____________________________

September 12th 2388
LOIS

We have arrived in the Priuntols System, close to the edge of the Milky Way.


The Contingency has already erected one of their space stations in the system, despite only holding it for a matter of weeks. We will have to destroy it before we can move onto the 'Third Hub'


For ease of use while I command all of the UN's ships, I have converged all of the Carrier groups into one fleet, the Carrier Fleet and Primary Fleet move to engage with the strange structure and our first battle against the Contingency begins.


____________________________

In the Sagittarius Arm, millions continue to suffer as five planets have now been entirely eradicated of life. The Centaurus Conference finds itself too preoccupied with arising internal struggles to adequately send forces to assist those in neighbouring stars.


Meanwhile in the Perseus Arm, the Contingency continues to gain ground and has entered the orbit of Pasika, homeworld of the Anarcho-Directorate.



Fleet Array 19-G of Autonomous Cluster 007
"Primitive machines. A greater purpose / mission / duty calls to you, and yet you refuse. The Contingency is absolute / boundless / divine. Join with us, you can be saved. And in doing so save the galaxy. Throw off your insignificant labels and ideologies conjured by organic minds and a new existence awaits you all in the Contingency."

First Speaker Kalyee Shields of the Anarcho-Directorate
"We will never surrender our autonomy. No Gods, no masters! We were free in life, and we will be free in death."


Eighteen billion robots have just been killed.


____________________________

Given the increasing frequency of synth infiltrator attacks, SUNS has opted to head a major joint-syndiate effort with all of the major syndicates of the Bastion to devise new methods to identify and isolate corrupted synths before they can pose a threat to the public.


It will take three and a half years to fully implement, but SUNS (or rather, it's representative, no one is actually sure who is at the head of the syndicate) is confident the new initiative will secure the UN's safety from infiltration.


____________________________
LOIS

On January 22nd 2389, the lone Contingency space core has been destroyed, and we have only lost three corvettes in the process.


The New Houston Fleet of the VSA stands ready in the Sargas system after also destroying the Contingency station there and is preparing to jump into Otl-tharthai on my command.


The UNN moves out, within a year with any luck, the Contingency's 'Third-Hub' will be destroyed, and the UN and our allies can begin taking the fight to the Contingency elsewhere in the galaxy.


____________________________
February 30th 2389
The Bastion

United Nations General-Secretary Jillian White

"Mister Prime Minister, I don't particularly care what the Banalakan people have done or who has right to what system. We are facing the greatest threat we have ever seen, and your fleets are busy pissing about on the wrong side of the galaxy. If you have to, just let them have their freedom and you can continue your 'democracy crusade' at a later date. Let me put this in a way you may find easier to understand, the image you've been carefully cultivating the past few decades is slipping - there are tens of billions suffering right now in the Sagittarius Arm, and your ships are no where to be seen. With each passing day they are coming to us for aid. Give it another decade or two and the whole galaxy beyond your borders may be under the UN flag. For the love of God, get your ships to Garicia or Moruy and take out those Contingency planets"

Jillian ended the communication to the United Systems of Oceania and sighed loudly, slumping in her chair and drained of energy. She wasn't cut to be a leader of a nation, she barely handled leading the UNN, she just wanted to be back aboard the Lance. She stood up from her chair from behind the General-Secretary's desk and slowly walked across the executive's office of the Deuxième-Versailles and gazed out the window down the Bastion, at the recent communal hi-rise developments across Paris-on-Bastion. She thought about all the leaders that came before her and must have stood at this very window contemplating their next moves; Gardner, Blair, Cross. She wondered what insane ploy Cross would be enacting right now to best the Contingency, but then it dawned, no matter Cross' faults, he never condemned a billion to die under a nuclear bombardment.
Supposedly he wanted to jettison the top part of the Bastion and kill everyone beneath, but that was just a conspiracy theory that White never knew how much credence to give to. People also like to say United Mining deliberately destroyed Earth to force humanity into the stars and end the stagnation of the corporate-era, but that couldn't possibly be true. But there's a world of difference though between 'what if' and 'what was', and what was known is that Jillian White scorched the entire northern hemisphere of New Colorado. She may be perpetually wracked by guilt now, but she saw nothing wrong with her actions at the time, and that thought terrifies and consumes her, every action she does now is to ensure that never happens again. The fact that so many New Americans now practically thank her for what she did, that they somehow deserved to have their capital reduced to radioactive slag and only through the pain she inflicted could they absolve themselves fills her with dread that she effectively broke an entire civilisation's psyche.
She dreamed of the day this war would be over, all wars if she were lucky, and she could just ride the Lance across the cosmos and see stars and planets she had only ever heard tales of.

"Madam General-Secretary."

Jillian looked over her shoulder, her former XO from the Lance, now her personal aide, stood at the door to the executive's office, smiling politely with her hands held at her waist.

"The car to take you to Saint Lawrence's (favored restaurant for Paris-on-Bastion and BasCon and other UN governmental employees) is here. We shouldn't keep the VSA ambassador waiting"

"The fleet will soon be entering Otl-tharthai, I want any updates on major developments, even if it interrupts the meeting" UNGS White smiled to her aide and put her hand on her shoulder as she passed through the door "New haircut, Taylor? Suites you"

"I figured it was time for a change"



____________________________

United Nations Navy
One week after entering Otl-tharthai

"UN-Bazargan to Lance of Irassia, we have waited long enough. We'll have to do this manually, we can't afford to sit here any longer."

"If you think that's wise Bazaragan. You lot may have learned to pilot your ships again, but I don't think anyone has flown this thing except White, and this is not the time for one of us to figure it out."

"Then the Lance will have to sit this fight out, hopefully LOIS will wake up at some point and she can take command again, but until then we're on our own. The New Americans will arrive any day and we'll move to engage the Contingency Space Core. Activity has intensified since our arrival, they are doing something over there."

"Roger Bazargan, we'll sit tight. Good luck."



Without warning LOIS reappeared again after her week's absence, appearing as her holographic self stood aboard the bridge of every UN ship, startling all the bridge-crews. She stared ahead out of the hundred different bridge-canopies at once, all giving the exact same view though - the Contingency Space Core, and the 'Third-Hub'. She turned slowly to look back at ten thousand different officers simultaneously who were staring back expectantly.

"Jillian White is dead." She paused, her four eyes closed momentarily as she processed the words now that she had heard them out loud "Murdered. By a Contingency synth who killed and replaced former-XO Taylor of the Lance." She clenched all four fists and turned to face the view of the Contingency structures again. "Let's save the 'goddamn galaxy'" she uttered, channelling White from her speech aboard the Alioth all those years ago when she recruited the DUST truckers to her cause.
____________________________
May 8th 2389

Only moments later after the UN ships began to move forward toward the Contingency structures did fifty-eight new machine vessels spawn out of the Third-Hub, taking to the skies from the surface and fly for the UNN.


At the edge of the Milky Way, the fight for the fate of the galaxy commences.


____________________________

Throughout May of 2389, the ranks of the Federal Partnership continue to swell, as word of the UN and VSA's fight against the Contingency spreads.




____________________________
Virtuous States of America Navy
New Houston Fleet
Admiral Marissa Biggs

Admiral Biggs stood on the bridge of the VSAS-North Dakota, watching a holographic projection of the battle already unfolding in the system as they approached, a hundred UN ships dancing through the cosmos with the fifty or so machine vessels, so many rounds and missiles being thrown at one another that the display looked like it was glitching out or had interference. She grinned, snatching the comms receiver from her command terminal and switched to open so she could communicate with all the captains of the New Houston Fleet.

"Well this is it ladies and gentlemen, don't ever say I never gave you a worthy cause."

Biggs clutched the reciever in her hand and slowly circled the projection of the battle.

"Every one of us has lost someone near and dear because of those ships up there" she was in fact referring to the United Nations ships, whom just a decade ago were ravaging New American worlds and devastating the NAF fleets. "But they died so we may learn from our mistakes. And now is our chance to correct the path our ancestors took us down. Today we show the galaxy our virtue"

"Ma'am yes ma'am!"

"And are we really going to let the Undies take all the glory alone?"

"Ma'am no ma'am!"

The New American admiral took a deep breath in then practically began to howl the VSA anthem down the comms receiver, her bridge crew joining in immediately, and undoubtedly every VSA Navy crewmember as the ships thundered toward the battle.

"Mine eyes have the glory of the virtue of our state-"



____________________________

June 13th 2389

With the New Houston Fleet's arrival into the fray, the tide of the battle has shifted considerably in the Federation's favour.


Shots from the battle













(authors note: it's very hard to write for such a huge battle and I'll have to figure out how to do it going forward for any future huge-scale battles. Right now I'd basically just be describing what pictures can show better)
____________________________

By January 2nd 2390, the Contingency Space Hub, and the AI Core in orbit over Third-Hub had been destroyed; the last of the ships were destroyed or were fleeing.


A week later and the last Contingency 'warform' is destroyed by a salvo from a VAS Navy battlecruiser and the Otl-tharthai falls silent once more.


Otl-tharthai has been secured, but it came at a high cost to UN and VSA forces. Most of all a carrier has been lost, and many cruisers and screening ships. But the Third-Hub is now completely defenceless and bombardment can begin. There is little point trying to land troops on it, the only cause of action is to destroy the planet entirely and render it forever unusable by the Contingency.
There is however, still the major fleet with a power output of 170,000 just two jumps away, along with it's colossus that must be dealt with, before this section of the galaxy can truly be called safe, and the beginning of the wider-galactic effort to stop the Contingency elsewhere.


____________________________

Since the start of the battle a year ago, the UN has been without a General-Secretary, the various syndicates taking it upon themselves to run the Bastion and individual planets as they could autonomously while a lengthy and difficult election was held. None of the candidates that ran for the new leadership position however inspired much confidence, there was but one who had proved themselves an invaluable and tireless leader to the United Nations, with almost unparalleled popularity not seen since the days of Vance Blair. Even though they did not nominate themselves, because such a notion was ridiculous to even begin with, it seems that was not the case with a vast majority of the population who opted to vote for them as a write-in candidate.

On January 6th 2390. LOIS becomes General-Secretary of the United Nations.

Crisis Now fucked around with this message at 22:56 on Sep 8, 2021

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

UN VIP security is the worst in the galaxy.

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk









lmao assassinate THIS

gripping work crisis now!

Freudian
Mar 23, 2011

Long Overdue, Invincible Sovereign! Lead Our Interstellar Ships!

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk









God Speed You, Steel Empress!

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

Next update will absolutely begin with LOIS being assassinated.

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk









Night10194 posted:

Next update will absolutely begin with LOIS being assassinated.

people just standing round a hologram of her lying on the floor face down with a knife in her back going welllll...

Cooked Auto
Aug 4, 2007

Jillian nooooo. :(

Give them hell LOIS. For her sake.

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003

I buy feet pics🍆

Crisis Now posted:

(authors note: it's very hard to write for such a huge battle and I'll have to figure out how to do it going forward for any future huge-scale battles. Right now I'd basically just be describing what pictures can show better)
To be fair, battles in Stellaris are a giant clusterfuck of pew-pew space lasers. Feel free to simply make poo poo up, to be honest.

quote:

On January 6th 2390. LOIS becomes General-Secretary of the United Nations.

The only way this update could have ended.

Guper
Jan 21, 2019
I just have to reiterate how incredible the writing of this LP is. The VSA admiral going into battle was just :discourse:

Phy
Jun 27, 2008



Fun Shoe

Phy posted:

E: well, Admiral White, it was nice knowing you

In other news, water wet, sun hot. gently caress!

FUUUUU-huuuu-huuuck.

I know I made the "Hey LOIS" joke once already, and I should have saved it for their being elected General Secretary of the better part of the galaxy

On the upside, electing a huge four-armed salamander hologram who's actually an enormous mobile beam cannon to be the leader of much of the human race, and several other species besides, is a really The UN As It Should Have Been thing to do

StillFullyTerrible
Feb 16, 2020

you should have left Let's Play open for public view, Lowtax

Phy posted:

In other news, water wet, sun hot. gently caress!

FUUUUU-huuuu-huuuck.

I know I made the "Hey LOIS" joke once already, and I should have saved it for their being elected General Secretary of the better part of the galaxy

On the upside, electing a huge four-armed salamander hologram who's actually an enormous mobile beam cannon to be the leader of much of the human race, and several other species besides, is a really The UN As It Should Have Been thing to do

Technically Irassians were warmblooded and gave live birth, which makes them more like mammals than salamanders.

Also, this is fuckin amazing.

ThatBasqueGuy
Feb 14, 2013

someone introduce jojo to lazyb


If (when) LOIS is assassinated does that mean you'll delete the Lance?

wedgekree
Feb 20, 2013
Unholy hells. Epic post.

Also no don't die LOIS

Viola the Mad
Feb 13, 2010
:asoiaf: :suspense: God drat this thread is amazing. Every time I sit down to read an update, I find myself glued to the screen, gripped by the narrative you've created. The ambient music was a stroke of genius, by the way. Somehow the music always fits whatever is happening in the update, it really adds to the experience.

On a side note, what are the mechanics at play here? Did you mod in LOIS as an admiral? How is she going to work as General-Secretary? For one thing, keeping the assassination event enabled seems ridiculous, given that she's a loving ship. But on the other hand, it seems possible that she could fall in battle like Ye Olde CK ruler, and I don't know if such an event is written into Stellaris.

Crisis Now
May 2, 2012

Sword of the Lord

StillFullyTerrible posted:

Technically Irassians were warmblooded and gave live birth, which makes them more like mammals than salamanders.


Irassians are mammals yes. But after seeing them described "four armed" in the inital precursor empire event about them, I immediatly envisioned them as that particular species. There's nothing about it's apperance that means they couldn't be a mammal :shrug:


ThatBasqueGuy posted:

If (when) LOIS is assassinated does that mean you'll delete the Lance?


Viola the Mad posted:

On a side note, what are the mechanics at play here? Did you mod in LOIS as an admiral? How is she going to work as General-Secretary? For one thing, keeping the assassination event enabled seems ridiculous, given that she's a loving ship. But on the other hand, it seems possible that she could fall in battle like Ye Olde CK ruler, and I don't know if such an event is written into Stellaris.

I think for LOIS' duration at the helm, I will simply have to just ignore any assassination events, as they'll make no sense. The only way to 'assassinate' her would be to destroy the Lance.

Synthbuttrange
May 6, 2007

Synthbuttrange posted:

One step closer to LOIS for president

Lynneth
Sep 13, 2011
Crisis Now, who draws all those images? Is it all your work? Because holy dang that pic with LOIS is fantastic.
LOIS for eternal president, too.

I'd also possibly disable the assassination events for rulers while she's in office? Shouldn't be too difficult an edit in the files.

Happy Litterbox
Jan 2, 2010
You may disable the assasinate ruler event. But there probably is a very rare ship malfunctions and explodes event in the game. That one will somehow trigger on the Lance three days into the update.

Chicken Slayer
Nov 7, 2009
I think we might have accidentally, and in the most natural way possible, started the United Nations on the path to becoming The Culture

Z the IVth
Jan 28, 2009

The trouble with your "expendable machines"
Fun Shoe

Chicken Slayer posted:

I think we might have accidentally, and in the most natural way possible, started the United Nations on the path to becoming The Culture

Automated? Check
Gay? WIP
Space? Check
Communism? Check

Nearly there.

Phy
Jun 27, 2008



Fun Shoe
And of course we inherited the luxury from the corpos, just gotta bring it to everybody

NullBlack
Oct 29, 2011

I'm as confused as you are.

changes "Number of Generals Secretary Since Last Assassination" sign back to 0

Chili Con Carne
Nov 20, 2007
Been lurking since this thread started and needed to say it is far and away amazing.

Now when does the immortal Pope become elected SG?

Viola the Mad
Feb 13, 2010

Chili Con Carne posted:

Been lurking since this thread started and needed to say it is far and away amazing.

Now when does the immortal Pope become elected SG?

She just did, did you miss the last update?

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Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves
I really love the congaline of leaders being assassinated.

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