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Derpies
Mar 10, 2014

BORN TO AWOO
WORLD IS A TUG
Squatch Em All 1989
I am trash poster
42,069 DEAD WOLFGIRLS




Thanks to this man, America is back baby and we are all going to BRUNCH at our favorite strip mall brunch locations.



Put yourself in the scene. Two days ot of your first vaccine shot and you're hungover and got a hankering for 15 dollar pancakes. So the question is:

What you doing at brunch?

Me? I'm having a pre-brunch tug then gonna go to my local brunch spot for some biscuits 9actually a brioche) and gravy (paprika spiced!) and gonna drink a 7 dollar Utah Mimosa (so orange juice) while I question my entire life.

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Sid Vicious
Jan 1, 1970




mimosas, can we get the song Shots playing in here please waiter thank you

Into The Mild
Mar 4, 2003







I'm gonna have either some Poke, or a Laksa for brunch

I wanna make sure both are spicy... so whichever i choose, i'll be spending lunch on the toilet!

The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002




hi im going to tell everyone very loudly about how the shakshuka in israel is SO much better than anything you can get here

Cobra Commander
Jan 18, 2011


Can I have my Eggs Benedict scrambled and some ketchup?

StarkRavingMad
Sep 27, 2001





Yams Fan

I've ordered a Bloody Mary but they put all sorts of weird poo poo in it as a garnish and I'm not sure how to feel about it

Derpies
Mar 10, 2014

BORN TO AWOO
WORLD IS A TUG
Squatch Em All 1989
I am trash poster
42,069 DEAD WOLFGIRLS




The Walrus posted:

hi im going to tell everyone very loudly about how the shakshuka in israel is SO much better than anything you can get here

this is the loving spirit STRONG suburban strip mall energy

a few DRUNK BONERS
Mar 25, 2016



I'm wearing a tank top and you catch a glimpse of my nipples as I reach for my bloody mary. This arouses you and you shift your chair slightly to get a better view.

naem
May 29, 2011



Iím the group of late twenties hipsters who are hungover after going out, getting morning after strip mall brunch ironically while secretly enjoying the kitschy decor and mildly alcoholic beverages and eggs earnestly

Into The Mild
Mar 4, 2003







gently caress it... if everyones ordering a drink im gonna day drink too


4 shots of whiskey and 4 beers please!

naem
May 29, 2011



Iím also the late 30ís couple out for strip mall brunch for whom this is the highlight of their weekend plans who are seated next to the 20 somethings and who are quietly delighted to still be with it at a place popular with young people

Derpies
Mar 10, 2014

BORN TO AWOO
WORLD IS A TUG
Squatch Em All 1989
I am trash poster
42,069 DEAD WOLFGIRLS




naem posted:

Iím the group of late twenties hipsters who are hungover after going out, getting morning after strip mall brunch ironically while secretly enjoying the kitschy decor and mildly alcoholic beverages and eggs earnestly

I am the suburban dad and mom at the table next to you just happy to be out of the house after a year while pretending our toddler isnt crawling under your table.

DarkSoulsTantrum
Apr 6, 2011

this kills the crab

Sure, they're visually impressive, but a lot of posters find large avatars physically uncomfortable. Furthermore, the owners of large avatars often rely on their size alone and don't bother to develop more refined posting techniques.





Brunchís is back baby. Itís good again. Awoouu (wolf Howl)

naem
May 29, 2011



I am also the 33 year old who brought a tinder date out to a strip mall for brunch, his date is 29, they exist in the perfect halfway point between the two previous groups and donít realize they are transitioning from one group to the other

Into The Mild
Mar 4, 2003







pro starcraft loser
Jan 23, 2006

Stand back, this could get messy.



I'm me just now realizing the only place I liked brunch doesn't have their Balkan pork eggs benedict anymore >

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004


here he comes
and he's gone again


Nap Ghost

just put the smoked salmon right in my mimosa

DarkSoulsTantrum
Apr 6, 2011

this kills the crab

Sure, they're visually impressive, but a lot of posters find large avatars physically uncomfortable. Furthermore, the owners of large avatars often rely on their size alone and don't bother to develop more refined posting techniques.





Can I get a hamburger instead?

Derpies
Mar 10, 2014

BORN TO AWOO
WORLD IS A TUG
Squatch Em All 1989
I am trash poster
42,069 DEAD WOLFGIRLS




naem posted:

Iím also the late 30ís couple out for strip mall brunch for whom this is the highlight of their weekend plans who are seated next to the 20 somethings and who are quietly delighted to still be with it at a place popular with young people

oh gently caress you beat me to being the people at the table next to you

Bula Vinaka
Oct 21, 2020

Beachside!


Only registered members can see post attachments!

Derpies
Mar 10, 2014

BORN TO AWOO
WORLD IS A TUG
Squatch Em All 1989
I am trash poster
42,069 DEAD WOLFGIRLS




*Orders the special lavender jelly that costs an additional $2.50*, "Oh jesus gently caress this tastes like a secented candle. I told you this was a hipster place we need to go back to the place on the other side of the strip mall!"

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004


here he comes
and he's gone again


Nap Ghost

another bloody mary please.... what do you mean, i haven't had too many. it's only 10 am

Grumblepuff
Dec 29, 2018

You think you taught me a lesson, babe
Betcha think you "got through to me"
No one gets through here anymore
Right


I am the man in the slightly too tight collared shirt tucked into his "good" pair of jeans at a large family gathering in the middle of the restaurant. It's obvious I don't want to be there, nor do I feel comfortable eating my second plate of eggs benedict as my shirt gets tighter, yet another reminder of my suburban fattening. I suck in my gut a bit as the waitress walks by in a vain reflex from my youth. I feel a secret shame between what I am and what I want to be, but drat pumpkin spice pancakes what whaat! Yes, two order please!

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER


I'll have a toasted everything bagel with cream cheese lox and capers thanks

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014



four more beers! four more beers! four more beers!

Sid Vicious
Jan 1, 1970




is it fine with everyone if i just order a burger or chicken fingers im not a big breakfast food guy

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013




First of all, ain't never seen brunch served in a friggin strip mall.
Second, are we gonna wrap this up before noon because the Packer game is on, so.
No, that's fine if you want to stay out, can we just go to Buffalo Wild Wings or the sports bar up the highway where they have TVs after and get some wings to watch it? WHAT?! I'm NOT being rude I SAID they could stay and hang out I just want to watch the drat game, christ eggs and screwdrivers shouldn't take 2 drat hou- I'm sorry, mimosas. Mimosas. I'm sorry. Eggs and mimosas shouldn't take 2 goddamn hours is all, oh what? You got mad when we went to the thing and it ran into your Yoga class. It's NOT different, you SAID you wanted to go - alright. Whatever. Whatever.

Spinz
Jan 7, 2020

I saw when the cocktail waitress opened the sixth bottle, and there was a great beach theme night; and the sun became black as Goon Lust, and the whole moon became as blush.

I hate you people, I want your baby to die in a fire, and

smiling brightly, "Can I bring you another mimosa?" as I remove your third emptied plate in 17 minutes

my dog died im sad
Jun 29, 2015


I'm leaning to the side so when I let out my fart it doesn't vibrate against the vinyl seat.

Doctor Dogballs
Apr 1, 2007

driving the fuck truck from hand land to pound town without stopping at suction station


Big Beef City posted:

First of all, ain't never seen brunch served in a friggin strip mall.

the strip mall right by me has a First Watch in it. idk if they serve alcohol there though

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006

In the cheery brightness of the 41st millennium there is only CHRISTMAS SPIRIT!


Mimosa??? I ain't having that froo-froo crap. I'll have a screwdriver, like a man!

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013




Doctor Dogballs posted:

the strip mall right by me has a First Watch in it. idk if they serve alcohol there though

Ok cool, did you want to head out to B-dubs at noon to catch the game then er no?
I just wanna see who's all goin.

Lieutenant Dan
Oct 27, 2009

Weedlord Bonerhitler


Look I googled all the places with Bottomless Mimosas in the entire neighborhood and this is the only place, now are we going in or not?

Derpies
Mar 10, 2014

BORN TO AWOO
WORLD IS A TUG
Squatch Em All 1989
I am trash poster
42,069 DEAD WOLFGIRLS




Spinz posted:

I hate you people, I want your baby to die in a fire, and

smiling brightly, "Can I bring you another mimosa?" as I remove your third emptied plate in 17 minutes

*Gives you a casual hand wave*

Excuse me miss, I asked for the gluten free fresh biscuits and these clearly are the gluten free *SOY* fresh biscuits little Jaeydin here can't eat that.

Weka
May 5, 2019

And if you gaze long into an abyss, you will say `look, no ring.`

Looks like brunch is back on the menu, boys!

**Jams head into plate whilst growling**

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!


I'm the girl at the table behind you that talks about inappropriate things, gets louder with each refill, and has a staccato, "HAHC. HAHC. HAHC. HAHC. HAHC. " laugh.

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013




3 bloody marys in I realize I should maybe make some small talk since I've been out of the general conversation, so I mention that I saw a great post on these forums that I go to, like, online. And so, uh, anyway, *spends about 3-4 minutes giving a jarbled back story and ends, with only me laughing* Ok so THAT'S how it get's to a hand drawn, Guy Fieri, as a half snake anime dude. I mean. Ok anyway I thought it was funny I'm sorry.

Derpies
Mar 10, 2014

BORN TO AWOO
WORLD IS A TUG
Squatch Em All 1989
I am trash poster
42,069 DEAD WOLFGIRLS




Big Beef City posted:

3 bloody marys in I realize I should maybe make some small talk since I've been out of the general conversation, so I mention that I saw a great post on these forums that I go to, like, online. And so, uh, anyway, *spends about 3-4 minutes giving a jarbled back story and ends, with only me laughing* Ok so THAT'S how it get's to a hand drawn, Guy Fieri, as a half snake anime dude. I mean. Ok anyway I thought it was funny I'm sorry.

I am your fellow goon friend at the same table but refuse to get your back in this one, leading to a helldump later.

Sid Vicious
Jan 1, 1970




im really high and just keep ordering more and more party platters, i eat half of the things from each and the rest get cold so i dont want to eat them and the half full party platters just pile up and pile up and eventually the virtual reality we are all coexisting in crashes from all the particles and polygons etc and other computer terms, another brunch ruined, this time for the last time

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The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002




*gets up to pay*


so we can split the bill right?

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