Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
EA Sports
Feb 10, 2007


So with the recent news about the kentucky derby winning horse testing positive for roids, i got to thinking. it's not like horses wear underwear, right? what's to stop a curious gentlemen such as myself from simply scouting out the competitors testicles before a race? 500 on small eggs please!

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

low key sex master
May 27, 2004

The human face is, after all, nothing more nor less than a mask.


How about you put in an honest days WORK op and grow your own testicles?

STABASS
Apr 18, 2009

I'll be the rollinbout


Fun Shoe

I don't wear underwear either, would you like to look at my testicles op?

Bronze Fonz
Feb 14, 2019






Woah are you the real EA Sportsģ?

Ventral EggSac
Dec 3, 2019



What prevents me jacking off all of the males and selling the stud cum?

Molentik
Apr 30, 2013



Ventral EggSac posted:

What prevents me jacking off all of the males and selling the stud cum?

The Big Horse Cum industry of course.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

IN THE GRIM BARKNESS
OF THE FUTURE
THERE ARE ONLY DOGS



Nap Ghost

If you buy up all the cobalt in the system and fly to the next system, dump all your cobalt and buy it back (plus whatever cobalt was on sale in the system already), you make a small profit after each sale. Aggregated over time each cobalt run will net you millions of credits.

Universe Master
Jun 20, 2005

Darn Fine Pie



Ventral EggSac posted:

What prevents me jacking off all of the males and selling the stud cum?

Racing horse owners insist on natural insemination. They will fly horses around the world for it.

Zeluth
May 12, 2001


Anything that helps soaks up my leaks.

Full Metal Jackass
Jan 22, 2001

Rabid bats are welcome in my home


If anyone knows how to make money off dumbasses it's EA Sports.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015



So youíve been sucking hitlers corpses dick and talking about his balls on the internet..

Linux Pirate
Apr 21, 2012

Well, there goes our grant money.





What level rung is Horse ball inspector considered at the dick sucking factory?

Mooey Cow
Jan 27, 2018



Pillbug

OP you may as well just keep working at the dick sucking factory. Sure it won't make you rich but it's a steady job and an honest day's work and it won't make you sick (unless you count aids, herpes or gonorrhea as sicknesses).

DarkSoulsTantrum
Apr 6, 2011

this kills the crab

Sure, they're visually impressive, but a lot of posters find large avatars physically uncomfortable. Furthermore, the owners of large avatars often rely on their size alone and don't bother to develop more refined posting techniques.






Time was you could make a lot of money at the dick sucking factory because they paid out a bonus for any piece work over rate. Once CockCo bought em out though they got rid of the bonus and now you just get your hourly rate and a summer cookout.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015



DarkSoulsTantrum posted:

Time was you could make a lot of money at the dick sucking factory because they paid out a bonus for any piece work over rate. Once CockCo bought em out though they got rid of the bonus and now you just get your hourly rate and a summer cookout.

I donít trust big cock.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

I only trust small local independent cock

Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012



try making money off of weed

AmbassadorofSodomy
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!


I figured out a good way to make money too OP.

I just go to the mall where there is a bathroom. Inside one stall there is a hole that looks in to the other stall. I go in there, and pretend to take a poo poo. THen someone will go in to the stall on the other side of the hole. They gently knock on the wall and pass some money through.
I take it and leave.

Can you imagine that?

I get paid to pretend to take a poo poo!!

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD

This is one of those things I'm almost positive already happens. I'd go as far as to say that the urine, blood, and faeces of race horses is regularly stolen.

aaaand of course that was the correct thing to assume.

https://apnews.com/e763983f1b2444cdb2db4870deb22f76

Nooner
Mar 26, 2007

an A+ poster (:

if ur a lady you can post puictures of ur butthole or also vaginea hole online and people will pay you money and also boobz or even ur feet lol

The Bloop
Jul 5, 2004




Ultra Carp

Nooner posted:

if ur a lady you can post puictures of ur butthole or also vaginea hole online and people will pay you money and also boobz or even ur feet lol

And if you have FEET HOLES they will pay even more

Pawn 17
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.







Horse piss with steroids has a very distinct taste OP.

mysterious frankie
Jan 11, 2009

This displeases Dev- ..van. Shut up.


I walk off trail through forests hoping to find the scene of a drug deal gone wrong where everyone shot each other, so I can take the bowling bag full of money. It's sort of like studying the Torah, where your wife has to put up with it and take care of you, because it's very important.

AmbassadorofSodomy
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!


Pawn 17 posted:

Horse piss with steroids has a very distinct taste OP.

Much more refreshing if you ask me.

Zil
Jun 4, 2011

I kind of want it.
Good Enough!




The Bloop posted:

And if you have FEET HOLES they will pay even more

OnlyStigmata

Katamari Democracy
Jan 18, 2010

Oh, We understand.
A trip to collect a million votes, yes.
Oh, we know why.
We get the point of rolling up a million


Wedge Regret

People pay me to keep my clothes on

HONG KONG SLUMLORD
Apr 21, 2003




Pillbug

What if the horse is a gelding though?

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004


here he comes
and he's gone again


Nap Ghost

AmbassadorofSodomy posted:

Much more refreshing if you ask me.

if you haven't tried it in your sodastream, you're missing out

Bad Purchase
Jun 17, 2019





why does storing less pee mean the horse will be faster on race day? besides, i bet they make all the horses pee right before the race, fully emptying their balls.

Weka
May 5, 2019

And if you gaze long into an abyss, you will say `look, no ring.`

A big saggy ballbag that can hold a lot of pee might trip up the horse, plus there's wind resistance.

E: I read the story about horse blood theft and it seems obvious the racing commission is fixing the races.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015



Nooner posted:

if ur a lady you can post puictures of ur butthole or also vaginea hole online and people will pay you money and also boobz or even ur feet lol

Prove it.

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

A Little Known FACT: Burger King's Bacon King is superior to the Baconator.


ClamdestineBoyster posted:

I donít trust big cock.

No, you thrust it. right into your rear end in a top hat.

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

A Little Known FACT: Burger King's Bacon King is superior to the Baconator.


I've got a cool way to make money OP. Get a bunch of $1 bills, bleach them, then print $100 bills on the paper. Get rich quick.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015



SLICK GOKU BABY posted:

No, you thrust it. right into your rear end in a top hat.

Rapey.

EA Sports
Feb 10, 2007


AmbassadorofSodomy posted:

I figured out a good way to make money too OP.

I just go to the mall where there is a bathroom. Inside one stall there is a hole that looks in to the other stall. I go in there, and pretend to take a poo poo. THen someone will go in to the stall on the other side of the hole. They gently knock on the wall and pass some money through.
I take it and leave.

Can you imagine that?

I get paid to pretend to take a poo poo!!

Dude I believe they paid you for oral sex, and are surely miffed about being denied their service rendered. to keep you from getting sued ill suck their dicks for you but i was atleast 50%. namaste

Dang It Bhabhi!
May 27, 2004

Every idiot can count to one.


I make money suckin' dick. Pay isn't that great but it's reliable. Very reliable.

Very. Reliable.

AmbassadorofSodomy
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!


EA Sports posted:

Dude I believe they paid you for oral sex, and are surely miffed about being denied their service rendered. to keep you from getting sued ill suck their dicks for you but i was atleast 50%. namaste

The most I'll give you is 40% and a hand job.

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

Self Defense
Nil Satanus carborundum

Yeshua akbar!
(Xtian anarchisto, no bombo)


Seĺl your dirty panties online. Get them nice and smelly first by wearing them a couple of days without washing your man "lady" parts.

Pro-tip: State "NOT dirty panties" on your eBay ad to avoid it being "pulled".

BigBadSteve fucked around with this message at 06:15 on May 12, 2021

Knot My President!
Jan 10, 2005





i made an onlyfeet

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

BJ factory is always hiring bucko

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply