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Aardvark!
Mar 3, 2002


you and your two best friends are driving 8 hours to Wendyscon, it's 20 minutes in, you're out of the city, the driver stops to get gas from completely empty and starts hinting about you paying for it.

you wander inside. a bored looking woman in her 40s is standing behind the counter daydreaming. there are copious ads for vape products behind her.

you don't expect you'll be stopping anywhere else any time soon.

you turn and breathe in deeply the sights and smells of the gas station convenience store:

donuts in a donut case -Fresh local doughnuts? maybe 2 day old Krispy Kreme? Who knows?

A bunch of hot coffee dispensers with creamers of all types imaginable. Nearby there's an entire section of "Little Debbie" products, honey buns, Zebra cakes, a veritable smorgasbord of pastry delight.

A fountain drink section is the next thing your puny mind must contend with, with four flavors of slushy and what must be a dozen different flavors of soda up for offer. An enormous cup is on display, with promises of Free Refill,

You probably shun the little end aisle with the automotive stuff and ramen bricks and phone chargers and unrefrigerated cases of soda and water bottles.

Maybe you make your first selection on the other end of the store? Where Monster Ultra can be had for the nigh-unbelievable price of 2/$4?

You've got your drink situation taken care of now. Maybe you got a Yoo-Hoo instead of the Monster? Or was it the siren call of the Mountain Dew bottle that got you to open that icy tomb of drinks?

No matter. Are you the kind of person to immediately start your day with a Hot Dog Roller product? Maybe a Jalapeno Sausage is how you get your kicks at 8:05AM on a Saturday in your buddy's Prius? How do you feel about eating Nachos in tight confines of a car with the only two of your friends that wanted to go to this thing, and you really don't know them that well, to be honest.

Finally the stockpiling can begin, the important aisles are here. BAM, Beef Jerky and nuts. HYAH candy bars and gum, more types than any man could taste in a lifetime. Chips, so many chips.

And then there's the poo poo that you can only really get at the convenience store: COMBOS. CHEX MIXES. Bags of those tasty brown wood chips! This, surely, is the heart and sole of your journey, is it not? How could anyone overlook the perfect travel food?

Grasping various bags, bottles, trays, bars, and packages, you head up to the cash register.

The lady says "morning".

There's a see through display in the counter you unburden yourself at. Scratch off lottery tickets. Is it your lucky day? You'll never know, if you don't get one.

Maybe you ask for a pack of cigarettes? Or some dip, to cunningly spit in the driver's cup later? Your card is approved. The cashier is looking straight ahead. She finally acknowledges you with a slight nod. she does not offer you a receipt. you did not see one print out.

So, what do you buy at the convenience store before a long trip?

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SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

Havin' a roni


Beer. And a fountain soda or something to put the beer in so the cops don't know what's going on.

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Universe Master
Jun 20, 2005

Darn Fine Pie



Biggest slim jim they have and a 20 ounce mello yello

maybe also a snickers

metachronos
Sep 11, 2001

When I roll, baby I roll DEEP

Slim jims or some other sort of beef sticks
Cheese & pretzel combos
Those starburst gummies with the juice inside
44oz dr. pepper from the fountain with lots of ice

muscles like this!
Jan 17, 2005




I usually get a fountain drink, since they are typically cheaper than buying bottle soft drinks and then one of those $.99 bags of Ritz cheese crackers. If they don't have that I get a candy bar.

carry on then
Jul 10, 2010


gonna browse and see what looks interesting. prolly just a snack bag and some candy tho, if i have any say in it we’re swinging by mcdonalds for some sausage mcmuffins

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Oh Don Piano
Nov 4, 2009




condoms, air fresheners, gallon of milk

Twenty Four
Dec 21, 2008




I would say cigarettes but there is no way I am going on a road trip that I'm not already prepped at least half a carton, but, I might buy a couple more packs just to be on the safe side.

Same mindset, gotta have drinks but I would already have a cooler stocked up with a variety of beverages.

With all that said I feel like "road jerky" is quintessential.

Zippy the Bummer
Dec 14, 2008

pro hobo

Silent Majority
THE DON







beef jerky and a bottle of sweet tea if they have it. ^^^^ i will also already have smokes. if it is a nicer store and they have Hunt Brothers pizza that looks like it was actually made that day, i might grab a slice



BaconCopter
Feb 13, 2008





I always stock up a day or two before at the grocery store to save a bunch of cash, but always scope what's good at the stations I stop at on my regular ~800 mile stint. Top priority to cool potato chips that I can't find by me: Jays BBQ and Utz Red Hot have to be the best, Zapp's Jalapeno are amazing too but they're finally stocked by me. Caffeine of some sort, pref black cold brew to avoid crashes, or the Rockstar Island Fruit that I can't find anymore. Maybe unsweetened ice tea.

Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

no meds = f4

if i forgot water i will purchase 1 single bottle of water. dont want to be giving my disgusting fail digestive system anything to do for a car trip. ill also skip breakfast and lunch, etc, op. only water. and small sips. some gum if there is going to mountains involved, for the ears. sound bitchmade? sound p*ssy? yep, youre right. thats just my life.

mlnhd
Jun 4, 2002



my wife always gets frito's and they stink up the whole car with that lovely toasted corn smell

i put a ban on frito's for all future road trips

DeadFatDuckFat
Oct 29, 2012

This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.


mlnhd posted:

my wife always gets frito's and they stink up the whole car with that lovely toasted corn smell

i put a ban on frito's for all future road trips

Is it assumed that corn nuts is included in your ban? Because those are even more corny smelling

DeadFatDuckFat fucked around with this message at 14:49 on Jun 20, 2021

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

Think Fast
Beef Hard


3 of those big pickles in a bag
Sour patch kids
Water
And then I start walking home without telling my friends why

big dyke energy
Jul 29, 2006

Football? Yaaaay


Some cheezits for sure

halokiller
Dec 28, 2008

Sisters Are Doin' It For Themselves



The largest fountain drink they have that could still fit in my cup holder (usually 64 oz)
Bottled water (usually less than 64 oz)
Whatever hot garbage they have that's sitting under the heating lamp (7-11 jalapeno cream cheese taquitos are )

Pennywise the Frown
May 10, 2010



Upset Trowel

metachronos posted:

Slim jims or some other sort of beef sticks (or the beef and cheese packs)
Cheese & pretzel combos

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Skylark
Apr 27, 2007



Pringles is a must

Please read my carrd before interacting.

Zippy the Bummer
Dec 14, 2008

pro hobo

Silent Majority
THE DON







slim jims are poo poo its just a stick of grease



Fartington Butts
Jan 21, 2007



Just returned from a road trip like 15 minutes ago. For me it's more about the weird stuff that I can find at a convenience store out of the way. Unfortunately this time it wasn't exciting and I ended up with 2 bottles of gatorade and some pepperoni combos.

I also think that's the first time I've had combos. They were whelming.

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002



$40 worth of $2 scratchers and I stand at the counter scratching every single one while you wait in line behind me with an armful of goods, your cheap cold drinks getting warm, your cheap hot snacks getting cold, you constantly re-adjusting, trying to catch the bag of Bugles that's about to fall with your elbow, while you're focused on this delicate balancing act, you squeeze through the foam cup you use to hold your 44 oz. fountain soda. I glance to my left, not far enough to actually see you behind me. I ask the cashier scan my tickets and cash me out. She hands me $14. "Can I getta packa Black & Mild, wood tip?"

Pennywise the Frown
May 10, 2010



Upset Trowel

Zippy the Bummer posted:

slim jims are poo poo its just a stick of grease

Exactly.

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WITCHCRAFT
Aug 28, 2007

Berries That Burn


Squirt of vanilla from either the soda machine or coffee station into a Coke slushie/icee

look for breakfast pizza, the best breakfast pizza comes from a gas station and it's covered in bacon crumbles and the grease leaks through paper plates

Biggest size soda fountain cup filled with cold brew coffee, no ice. That's like 8+ cups of coffee for $1.50. Combine with ice from the cooler later on in your road trip when you need a boost.

Get the trucker meth pills that are on a display next to the register. Save them for when you reach the destination so you can unload a truck full of furniture and storage tubs at 100% speed no matter what.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008


A quart of Borden chocolate milk and a king size Payday.

Oh Don Piano
Nov 4, 2009




Chief McHeath posted:

$40 worth of $2 scratchers and I stand at the counter scratching every single one while you wait in line behind me with an armful of goods, your cheap cold drinks getting warm, your cheap hot snacks getting cold, you constantly re-adjusting, trying to catch the bag of Bugles that's about to fall with your elbow, while you're focused on this delicate balancing act, you squeeze through the foam cup you use to hold your 44 oz. fountain soda. I glance to my left, not far enough to actually see you behind me. I ask the cashier scan my tickets and cash me out. She hands me $14. "Can I getta packa Black & Mild, wood tip?"

I barge in when this happens and tell them i have a child in the car. Checkmate LineHogs.

Fartington Butts
Jan 21, 2007



Oh Don Piano posted:

I barge in when this happens and tell them i have a child in the car. Checkmate LineHogs.

"My dog is locked in a hot car. Air conditioning is off and he is not listening to his favorite music."

Crusty Nutsack
Apr 21, 2005

SUCK LASER, COPPERS

WHY BE A FATCAT WHEN YOU CAN BE A SMOKERAT?

COOL ZONE HERO, ASK ME ABOUT MY LIVESTREAMS




I was on a road trip and on one snack stop I got two things that aren't available by me: Zapp's Cajun dill gator tators and a moon pie


Fartington Butts
Jan 21, 2007



Those slim almond bags are very good for just "drinking" as you drive without getting your hands all gross (if you're going for the ones with flavor).


Crusty Nutsack posted:

I was on a road trip and on one snack stop I got two things that aren't available by me: Zapp's Cajun dill gator tators and a moon pie

Hell yeah.

Aardvark!
Mar 3, 2002


Crusty Nutsack posted:

I was on a road trip and on one snack stop I got two things that aren't available by me: Zapp's Cajun dill gator tators and a moon pie

those gator taters are amazing. wish they were available here

GORDON
Jan 1, 2006

This avatar was paid for by the Silent Majority.

If it's early morning, a big coffee and a pack of coconut donuts.

If it's later in the day and I'm caffeinated, a big thing of white milk (and a pack of coconut donuts). On a road trip all you get from fast food is pop, so the milk is a nice change of pace.

YES NO

Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

no meds = f4

i cant drink milk. sad life

Smythe
Oct 12, 2003

no meds = f4

someties get oak milk from the store but its $$$$$$ so only very rare treat

BigFactory
Sep 17, 2002



Smythe posted:

someties get oak milk from the store but its $$$$$$ so only very rare treat

Got a blender and an old pair of pantyhose just lying around? You know what to do.

Pennywise the Frown
May 10, 2010



Upset Trowel

Smythe posted:

i cant drink milk. sad life

I can't remember the thread but someone recommended it and I started buying Fairlife. Well, just once so far. I got it because that it's ultra filtered and lasts a long time because I use milk slowly. It's also lactose free. I don't remember the price though.

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YeahTubaMike
Mar 24, 2005

*hic* Gotta finish thish . . .


Doctor Rope

Party-size spicy nacho Doritos, party-size white cheddar Popcorners, 2-liter Coke. We can go eight hours without protein, but not without finger food.

edit:

Smythe posted:

someties get oak milk from the store but its $$$$$$ so only very rare treat

uh, oak milk? Is that a thing now too?

mlnhd
Jun 4, 2002



I actually read the OP thoroughly this time, and I gotta agree with the brown wood chips.

muscles like this!
Jan 17, 2005




mlnhd posted:

I actually read the OP thoroughly this time, and I gotta agree with the brown wood chips.


There's no way that's real.

mlnhd
Jun 4, 2002



they're real and they're spectacular

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

Think Fast
Beef Hard


muscles like this! posted:

There's no way that's real.

They are 110% real and I love them

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Pennywise the Frown
May 10, 2010



Upset Trowel

I'm afraid to get those because I like getting the rare one in the regular bag and I think that might be being too greedy. The hubris of man.

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