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Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008






Gravy Boat 2k

https://twitter.com/DallasTexasTV/status/1406979599158763522?s=20

I've had it. This is the last straw. These MOTHERFUCKERS at Texas Motor Speedway have crossed the FUCKIN line. It is 100 degrees outside in the drat Texas summer and this freedom loving, red blooded American man wants to bring his cooler into the last bastion of freedom in American sports: NASCAR. So just like every year that came before, this guy wants to bring a FUCKIN cooler so he can FUCKIN snack and drink some GODDAMN drinks while he watches these cars haul rear end. But no the Texas Motor Speedway decided in 2021 to suck poo poo and ban coolers. Now you gotta cram everything into a FUCKIN clear backpack. What in the gently caress is this poo poo????? Dale Earnhardt would have stomped this poo poo into a shower drain faster than his No. 3 could have seen the checkered flags.


I need this thread to highlight only the bravest, strongest mother FUCKERS in this country who have to deal with the relentless BULLSHIT life keeps throwing at them.


gently caress

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Derpies
Mar 10, 2014

BORN TO AWOO
WORLD IS A TUG
Squatch Em All 1989
I am trash poster
42,069 DEAD WOLFGIRLS




Big race car once again tuggin around the little man who just wants some cool milk while he watches people turn left

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD

Are the kid's school bags transparent because of a mandate that they need to be as some kind of child massacre prevention initiative?

Nefarious 2.0
Apr 22, 2008

Offense is overrated anyway.



haha great video gurf

Anime Bernie Bro
Feb 4, 2020

FUCK MY ASSHOLE, LOL


i feel like F1 racing is more interesting

BIG TIT LIL NIP
Oct 5, 2005






sex cooler

DickParasite
Dec 2, 2004




Slippery Tilde

drat that dude is bright red.

OMFG FURRY
Jul 10, 2006

[snarky comment]


do I wear sunscreen? gently caress NO. i ain't letting no one tell me what to do with my body, it's MY CHOICE.

as an aside, abortion is a sin.

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

Self Defense
Nil Satanus carborundum

Yeshua akbar!
(Xtian anarchisto, no bombo)


Funky See Funky Do posted:

Are the kid's school bags transparent because of a mandate that they need to be as some kind of child massacre prevention initiative?

The venue is allowing people to carry in 14x14x14 inch clear backpacks, with or without ice, food and drinks. Yeah, probably to prevent guns being smuggled in and used for mass murder.

Good idea.

beer gas canister
Oct 30, 2007

W E L C O M E T O M Y C U S T O M T I T L E ! ! !


Plaster Town Cop

of course nothing is sacred in texas

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008






Gravy Boat 2k

beer gas canister posted:

of course nothing is sacred in texas

oh, poo poo

my bad

Good soup!
Nov 1, 2010



Anime Bernie Bro posted:

i feel like F1 racing is more interesting

Because it is

Schweinhund
Oct 23, 2004

                                       


BigBadSteve posted:

The venue is allowing people to carry in 14x14x14 inch clear backpacks, with or without ice, food and drinks. Yeah, probably to prevent guns being smuggled in and used for mass murder.

Good idea.

good to see they're taking care of the gun problem in this country

sweet thursday
Sep 16, 2012



I'm sure cooler heads will prevail

Nooner
Mar 26, 2007

an A+ poster (:

nascar would be a lot cooler if they would crash more. like i dont want to see anyone get hurt that is hosed up but like, it is 2021 why cant we just get like self driving cars that go really really fast in circles and then crash real big a lot, i would watch the gently caress out of that sport

Full Metal Jackass
Jan 22, 2001

Rabid bats are welcome in my home


it's pretty lovely you can't bring your own cooler ngl

Bloopsy
Jun 1, 2006

you have been visited by the Tasty Garlic Bread. you will be blessed by having good Garlic Bread in your life time, but only if you comment "ty garlic bread" in the thread below

The NASCAR thread title in SAS makes me laugh everytime I see it.

Salacious Spy
May 28, 2010

Well the word got around they said this kid is insane, man
Banged in the mouth and now he's got AIDS, man


Nooner posted:

nascar would be a lot cooler if they would crash more. like i dont want to see anyone get hurt that is hosed up but like, it is 2021 why cant we just get like self driving cars that go really really fast in circles and then crash real big a lot, i would watch the gently caress out of that sport

this is unironically a badass idea

OMFG FURRY
Jul 10, 2006

[snarky comment]


Nooner posted:

nascar would be a lot cooler if they would crash more. like i dont want to see anyone get hurt that is hosed up but like, it is 2021 why cant we just get like self driving cars that go really really fast in circles and then crash real big a lot, i would watch the gently caress out of that sport

nascar but driven by twitch chat

Salacious Spy
May 28, 2010

Well the word got around they said this kid is insane, man
Banged in the mouth and now he's got AIDS, man


there are a bunch of different breeds of people here in TX depending on where you come from. the average Dallas person is different from the average Houston person is different from the average Austin person etc. PS San Antonio is the best TX city, the rest are full of dorks and losers.

Milo and POTUS
Sep 3, 2017

I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?


OMFG FURRY posted:

nascar but driven by twitch chat

actual nascar is probably less racist

Dignity Van Houten
Jul 28, 2006

abcdefghijk
ELLAMENNO-P


lol imagine going to see avengers endgame at the movie theater and lugging a 55 gallon yeti that weighs 250 pounds loaded with ice and Snapple and orange Gatorade

boarding a plane and buying an extra ticket for your cooler

minor league baseball game and you ruffle through the melted ice and pull out a ham sandwich, but the bread is soggy because the plastic wrap wasn't right enough

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

Sorry guys, I'm just a donut.



Nooner posted:

nascar would be a lot cooler if they would crash more. like i dont want to see anyone get hurt that is hosed up but like, it is 2021 why cant we just get like self driving cars that go really really fast in circles and then crash real big a lot, i would watch the gently caress out of that sport

I just think they should make competitive bomb making a sport. They could have points for yield, for style, various other criteria determined by the governing body for the professional non-violent international bomberís league, it would just be a lot of fun and maybe it would prevent somebody who would otherwise be a mad bomber from becoming a terrorist. Iím picturing it as a rural sport, with small but extremely rowdy audiences. Somebody tell me all the reasons this is a terrible idea because from this drunk angle it looks golden.

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD

Salacious Spy posted:

this is unironically a badass idea

I thought the whole idea of Nascar was the chance of seeing a young life get snuffed out in a car decorated with tobacco and alcohol advertisements? I mean otherwise it's just cars driving in circles.

Elburroman
Dec 27, 2012


I am capable of sitting in a packed, uncovered stadium for at least a few hours with no cooler, and this effete fellows effete response to perhaps his 2nd time being told "no" in his life has not moved me, but I will boycott matchbox, and in that sense he and I are married

Salacious Spy
May 28, 2010

Well the word got around they said this kid is insane, man
Banged in the mouth and now he's got AIDS, man


Funky See Funky Do posted:

I thought the whole idea of Nascar was the chance of seeing a young life get snuffed out in a car decorated with tobacco and alcohol advertisements? I mean otherwise it's just cars driving in circles.

the valkyrie's hand on my shoulder as I plunge screaming into the Pennzoil logo, my entire physical being instantly annihilated in an eruption of divine flame. the stands thunder with the songs of our fathers

Xenocides
Jan 14, 2008

This world looks very scary....



Funky See Funky Do posted:

I thought the whole idea of Nascar was the chance of seeing a young life get snuffed out in a car decorated with tobacco and alcohol advertisements? I mean otherwise it's just cars driving in circles.

To quote the Onion:

ďThat is a common misconception. Theyíre actually ovals.Ē

Yvershek
Nov 15, 2000

and there are no
diamonds in the
mine


I'm eagerly awaiting how Texans react to bitcoin collapsing their joke of an electrical grid.

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017


I am confused and disoriented,
but now I have and this wonderful avatar


THIS IS HORSESHIT

YOU KNOW WHO PAYS THE BILLS, NASCAR

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008






Gravy Boat 2k

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

Self Defense
Nil Satanus carborundum

Yeshua akbar!
(Xtian anarchisto, no bombo)


Schweinhund posted:

good to see they're taking care of the gun problem in this country

Yes, unironically, and may many more Anericans also do more than nothing about it.

Novo
May 13, 2003

Stercorem pro cerebro habes

Soiled Meat

the most texan position is that it's bullshit that you can't bring your guns literally anywhere you want

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

What if you bring see-through guns made outta glass huh

Turrurrurrurrrrrrr
Dec 22, 2018


Elburroman posted:

I am capable of sitting in a packed, uncovered stadium for at least a few hours with no cooler, and this effete fellows effete response to perhaps his 2nd time being told "no" in his life has not moved me, but I will boycott matchbox, and in that sense he and I are married

Serious Post: I bought beer and pizza for my family at a Texas race track kiosk and it cost ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS. So follow the money and you can see why the guy is upset. He wanted to relax on the cheap, chilling to some engine noice in hundred degree temps and humidity, but got denied the only comfort imaginable in that hell scape: his cooler. gently caress YOU TEXAS MOTOR SPEEDWAY.

Chillgamesh
Jul 29, 2014

I JUST CAN NOT FUCKING SHUT THE HELL UP ABOUT BUNNYBOYS!!!!!!!! hOLY SHIT TAILS!!! THATS WHAT I CALL POGGERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
FUCK


Yvershek posted:

I'm eagerly awaiting how Texans react to bitcoin collapsing their joke of an electrical grid.

"gently caress'n WINDMILLS!"

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number

Pillbug

It might be the perfect mix of darkly funny and sad if minor inconveniences like this one become a contributing factor to gun control advancing. School shootings are seemingly easy to ignore but some real abrasive security theatre might just get people to say it's not worth it.

Milo and POTUS
Sep 3, 2017

I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?


Turrurrurrurrrrrrr posted:

Serious Post: I bought beer and pizza for my family at a Texas race track kiosk and it cost ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS. So follow the money and you can see why the guy is upset. He wanted to relax on the cheap, chilling to some engine noice in hundred degree temps and humidity, but got denied the only comfort imaginable in that hell scape: his cooler. gently caress YOU TEXAS MOTOR SPEEDWAY.

its not like it was good food either in all likelihood

Poohs Packin
Jan 13, 2019

My god, Winston, is that infernal sun still giving my buttocks that entirely too cool smirk?!


ArbitraryC posted:

It might be the perfect mix of darkly funny and sad if minor inconveniences like this one become a contributing factor to gun control advancing. School shootings are seemingly easy to ignore but some real abrasive security theatre might just get people to say it's not worth it.

I may be wrong but I wouldnt be surprised if there were NASCAR or other racing events where it was totally legal to open carry.

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

Sorry guys, I'm just a donut.



Poohs Packin posted:

I may be wrong but I wouldnt be surprised if there were NASCAR or other racing events where it was totally legal to open carry.

It would be weird if it was the other way tbh.

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Poohs Packin
Jan 13, 2019

My god, Winston, is that infernal sun still giving my buttocks that entirely too cool smirk?!


Maybe they just want to throttle the volume of hard liquor people are carting in to stop insane drunk people problems and medica emergencies?

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