Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Areola Grande



thinking about Dad and it's not enough

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Popputan

Mahou Shoujo brainrot syndrome. It's terminal.


think about somethin' scary. It'll make you'r blood run cold so no more hot blood will be circulating in your penis. Here i'll help; BOO!!

Finger Prince

"I think he's watching us..."

"No, it's just the Mountain Peeks."
(Source)



True story: our high school wood shop class made dildos on the lathe for the sex ed class so everyone could practice putting on condoms.

Robot Made of Meat



Have you tried meowing like a cat and crawling out of the room backward on all fours?


Thanks to Manifisto for the sig!

biosterous






Finger Prince posted:

True story: our high school wood shop class made dildos on the lathe for the sex ed class so everyone could practice putting on condoms.

this loving rules



thank you nut for this sig!!!
gallery of sigs

get your probe badge here
he/him or they/them, either works

Ventral EggSac



Think about the grain of the wood, how it flows down the board in waves. Sometimes the waves meet, and oh, oh my it looks like the wood grain spreading its legs, oh, I see why they call you Pine, cause girl you got me pining for you

FutonForensic



never tell a man with a circular saw that you need a bonerr removed quickly


by Khanstant

Gramps





Areola Grande posted:

thinking about Dad and it's not enough

Just flex both your legs as hard as you can it'll steal all the blood from your peepee. You'll be limp as a noodle and free to go back to nailing together your birdhouse/gluing together your cutting board before you know it

Zil

I kind of want it.
Good Enough!




Gramps posted:

Just flex both your legs as hard as you can it'll steal all the blood from your peepee. You'll be limp as a noodle and free to go back to nailing together your birdhouse/gluing together your cutting board before you know it

The true life hax right here

Percy Teatwillow

hi. my name is steven. I'm available for birthdays. here's my card...call me..


just own it. walk up there like “THIS IS NORMAL AND HEALTHY. PLEASE DO NOT STARE AT MY ERECTION.”

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/HardtofindImpossibleHoneyeater-mobile.webm
^^^special shout-out to vanisher^^^

Gluehead posted:

i met snow at a restaurant once and i was like 'man, informer is a really good song!' and he just looked up from the bowl of french onion soup he was eating, mouthed the words 'gently caress off' and then he gave me the finger twice with boths hands, then crossed the two fingers to make a cross and aimed it at me
Prof. Crocodile



Percy Teatwillow posted:

just own it. walk up there like “THIS IS NORMAL AND HEALTHY. PLEASE DO NOT STARE AT MY ERECTION.”

this is basically what lost me my seat in the US House of Representatives.


thank you pot smoke phoenix for this amazing sig!

cruft



FutonForensic posted:

never tell a man with a circular saw that you need a bonerr removed quickly

who's that orb with the new chainsaw?

Luvcow




gloryhole

thats what they installed them for

Areola Grande



Luvcow posted:

gloryhole

thats what they installed them for

watho


The real world will, again tomorrow, function and run without me.



*slamming the gigantic red “boner emergency” button on the table saw*



thank u vanisher for the sig

Luvcow




watho posted:

*slamming the gigantic red “boner emergency” button on the table saw*

running to the op with a large sheet of 4'x8' plywood, holding up one finger to say "wait!", picking up my cordless drill with the 3" hole saw bit attached and drilling a proper glory hole, holding up my finger again, changing bits to a sanding tool and then carefully smoothing the edges of the hole, holding up my finger one last time, applying a generous amount of duct tape around the edges to make sure it's smooth and splinter free, motioning to someone to bring me a chair and then asking them to stay and prop up the plywood sheet as i sit down on the other side... waiting pensively...

Zil

I kind of want it.
Good Enough!




Luvcow posted:

running to the op with a large sheet of 4'x8' plywood, holding up one finger to say "wait!", picking up my cordless drill with the 3" hole saw bit attached and drilling a proper glory hole, holding up my finger again, changing bits to a sanding tool and then carefully smoothing the edges of the hole, holding up my finger one last time, applying a generous amount of duct tape around the edges to make sure it's smooth and splinter free, motioning to someone to bring me a chair and then asking them to stay and prop up the plywood sheet as i sit down on the other side... waiting pensively...

Wait 3 inches?

Is...isn't that too big?


Big thanks to Heather Papps for my first BYOB sig!!11!

Finger Prince

"I think he's watching us..."

"No, it's just the Mountain Peeks."
(Source)



Gramps





Zil posted:

Wait 3 inches?

Is...isn't that too big?

that is discriminatory against tuna cans, assorted chodes and other comedy penis options

Robot Made of Meat




The worst kielbasa slicer in history.


Thanks to Manifisto for the sig!

Vei


my go-to is thinking about being forced, at gunpoint, to use a can full of razors like a fleshlight in front of my dead grandma

Areola Grande



:concerned:

your friend sk

(ヤイケス!)




just throw your boner on the lathe and you can disguise it as a table leg or w/e


thank you BALLS DILDO!!


Add to your sig if you're a proud supporter of Local 69!
Check out my Retired Sig Parade!


share your shame here

google THIS



Finger Prince posted:

True story: our high school wood shop class made dildos on the lathe for the sex ed class so everyone could practice putting on condoms.

It's not often you can get an A for giving your teacher a D

Areola Grande



google THIS posted:

It's not often you can get an A for giving your teacher a D

speak 4 urself pal :grin:

Code Jockey

you can call
but I seldom answer after all




It's the drill press isn't it, stop using the drill press

used to happen to me all the time, it's a very suggestive machine

Escape From Noise

Would an advertising executive
Understand where the homeless live?
Would he know about the bubbles in his glass?
Would the bubbles in his glass
Understand what the man's golf cart is?
Do they know you can die frozen underneath an overpass?


Robot Made of Meat posted:

Have you tried meowing like a cat and crawling out of the room backward on all fours?

Goldmine

Escape From Noise

Would an advertising executive
Understand where the homeless live?
Would he know about the bubbles in his glass?
Would the bubbles in his glass
Understand what the man's golf cart is?
Do they know you can die frozen underneath an overpass?


Prof. Crocodile posted:

this is basically what lost me my seat in the US House of Representatives.

Oooohhh! You said election year! My mistake!

Areola Grande



still at half mast but no longer at school. never thought a huge throbbing boner would be the final straw but here we are. Selling my house and dog tomorrow

:boom:

I attribute my outcome to the brave posters ITT.
TYVM. U can't win em all


summer sig by Heather Papps®

Escape From Noise

Would an advertising executive
Understand where the homeless live?
Would he know about the bubbles in his glass?
Would the bubbles in his glass
Understand what the man's golf cart is?
Do they know you can die frozen underneath an overpass?


If you can't beat it, join it.

Code Jockey

you can call
but I seldom answer after all




I heard shop class was hard, but this is ridiculous!

watho


The real world will, again tomorrow, function and run without me.



time to practice pirouettes right next to the band saw. i sure hope i don’t get an instant throbbing erection now



thank u vanisher for the sig

Finger Prince

"I think he's watching us..."

"No, it's just the Mountain Peeks."
(Source)



Escape From Noise posted:

If you can't beat it, join it.

Weka

And if you gaze long into an abyss, you will say `look, no ring.`

Next time fashion yourself a skeleton costume. Nobody is surprised to see a boner on a skeleton.

Escape From Noise

Would an advertising executive
Understand where the homeless live?
Would he know about the bubbles in his glass?
Would the bubbles in his glass
Understand what the man's golf cart is?
Do they know you can die frozen underneath an overpass?


Hope for the best, prepare for the boner.

your friend sk

(ヤイケス!)




Escape From Noise posted:

If you can't beat it, join it.


thank you BALLS DILDO!!


Add to your sig if you're a proud supporter of Local 69!
Check out my Retired Sig Parade!


share your shame here

google THIS



Areola Grande posted:

speak 4 urself pal :grin:

With the superintendent's approval, I mean

canyoneer


I only have canyoneyes for you


Gramps posted:

Just flex both your legs as hard as you can it'll steal all the blood from your peepee. You'll be limp as a noodle and free to go back to nailing together your birdhouse/gluing together your cutting board before you know it

i'm a grown man and am just now hearing of this discreet method to get rid of nuisance boners

Gramps





canyoneer posted:

i'm a grown man and am just now hearing of this discreet method to get rid of nuisance boners

I only learned about it a few years ago. Should be part of 6th grade health class curriculum for sure

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Escape From Noise

Would an advertising executive
Understand where the homeless live?
Would he know about the bubbles in his glass?
Would the bubbles in his glass
Understand what the man's golf cart is?
Do they know you can die frozen underneath an overpass?


A no kill shelter for unwanted boners.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply