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CyberPingu
Sep 15, 2013


If you're not striving to improve, you'll end up going backwards.

Yes football is back!

After a fairly uneventful summer with no European tournaments worth noting and who the gently caress cares about Olympic football we are graced once again by Premier League football starting in 2 weeks

Welcome to all the new posters that somehow found our bastion of shitposting about IRL Subbuteo, not sure how you found us this summer with no notable European tournaments going on tbh but we hope you hang around, pick a fun team if you dont have one already.

Your current league table:



We welcome Watford and Norwich back to the league and newcomers Brentford make up our promoted teams.

For the nth season in a row Arsenal start top of the league, however insider knowledge has told me this will be rectified after the first week of the season.

During the summer Manchester Utd went and bought all their transfer targets and have already been crowned champions, so this obviously wont blow up in their faces.

City may or may not spend £200m on Grealish and Kane

Liverpool ive been told are stil poo. This is eternal. We bought Ibrahim Konate, another CB with....poo poo, a poor injury record.


Oh and Newcastle have kept Steve Bruce on for "reasons"...

Notable dates:

7th August - Everyone's 3rd favourite team (behind Leeds) Leicester City play perennial under investigation for cheating Manchester City in the Community Shield.
13th August - League kicks off with Brentford hosting mid table cloggers (and my darkhorse relegation candidate) Arsenal
14th/15th August - Rest of our Match week 1 fixtures

CyberPingu fucked around with this message at 08:36 on Aug 2, 2021

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belgend
Mar 6, 2008

League: Jupiler
Cup: Croky
Trophies: None
Yep, it's Belgefoot time


Up the toffees

Frankston
Jul 27, 2010




end the season now lmao

Burnley, Norwich and Watford will be relegated.

Frankston
Jul 27, 2010




Grealish is staying at Villa btw

JohnCompany
Jan 16, 2015

this sentence no verb



Strange that the thread promoting the league where European champion Jorginho plays for European champion Chelsea wouldn't mention that.

CyberPingu
Sep 15, 2013


If you're not striving to improve, you'll end up going backwards.

JohnCompany posted:

Strange that the thread promoting the league where European champion Jorginho plays for European champion Chelsea wouldn't mention that.

I don't know what you mean OP.

The last European Championship was won by Portugual.

There was supposed to be one last summer but the pandemic cancelled it and they just decided to skip it until 2024

Jose
Jul 24, 2007





Lol

https://twitter.com/ScottForbes86/status/1422092615101603842?s=19

the sex ghost
Sep 6, 2009




Leeds are actually everyone's second team now op. We've signed a new reserve goalkeeper to replace the racist one that we sent out on loan because no one wants his awful contract, and a fullback from Barcelona and thats it. Prepared for a tricky second season

CyberPingu
Sep 15, 2013


If you're not striving to improve, you'll end up going backwards.

the sex ghost posted:

Leeds are actually everyone's second team now op. We've signed a new reserve goalkeeper to replace the racist one that we sent out on loan because no one wants his awful contract, and a fullback from Barcelona and thats it. Prepared for a tricky second season

This is true. Updating the OP

Jose
Jul 24, 2007





Newcastle have yet to sign anyone and have no money to spend lol

KYOON GRIFFEY JR
Apr 12, 2010




Frankston posted:

Grealish is staying at Villa btw

inshallah

McFlurry Fan #1
Dec 31, 2005

He can't kill me. I'm indestructible. Everybody knows that

Ready for another mildly disappointing spurs season in which we miss out on Champions League, bottle the Europa Conference at the first hint of a decent team and get done in a domestic cup semi by probably Chelsea.

The neutrals might not hate us as much now Mou is gone though, but I don't rate Nuno as the manager to really get the team to push on.

On the positive, new signings and potential signings look good and I'm sure the cheese room is ready for a big season.

Starsnostars
Jan 17, 2009

The Master of Magnetism


I'm hoping Southampton can manage to play well over a whole season rather than the half season we managed last season. We've signed a left back to replace Bertrand and a couple of Chelsea youth players but perhaps more importantly we've finally got some deadwood like Hoedt and Lemina off the wage bill.

Aston Villa can gently caress off with their £25m bid for Ward-Prowse though, if we do sell we better be asking for at least half their Grealish money.

Looke
Aug 2, 2013



McFlurry Fan #1 posted:

Ready for another mildly disappointing spurs season in which we miss out on Champions League, bottle the Europa Conference at the first hint of a decent team and get done in a domestic cup semi by probably Chelsea.

The neutrals might not hate us as much now Mou is gone though, but I don't rate Nuno as the manager to really get the team to push on.

On the positive, new signings and potential signings look good and I'm sure the cheese room is ready for a big season.

waiting on my cheese room season ticket

blue footed boobie
Sep 14, 2012


UEFA SUPREMACY

Arsenal look to have spent approx £75m this season without having got appreciably better. In fact, since they haven’t replaced Odegaard, they’re probably worse than they were in the second half of last season.

Arsenal hosed around all summer buying kids who are by all accounts bad and taking six months to wrap up the Ben white deal. Now they have to panic buy the attacking midfielder that Arteta has been saying he’s needed to make his system with for two years.

Omnikin
May 28, 2007

Press 'E' for Medic


I have received word that Erling Haaland may or may not be interested potentially in a transfer to European champion Chelsea but Dortmund are not altogether uninterested in selling for the wrong price and Roman hasn't not submitted a bid to be confirmed yet

Tier 1 journo btw

the sex ghost
Sep 6, 2009




Huge if true

FullLeatherJacket
Dec 30, 2004

Chiunque può essere Luther Blissett, semplicemente adottando il nome Luther Blissett



Really happy with United's transfer dealings so far (which are down to Ole's strategic planning if they're successful, and a final blow from the accursed Woodward on his way out if not), but honestly not sure that we'll have the depth to win the league this season unless Liverpool and City both drop off from where they were respectively in the last couple of seasons

Progress still better than being Tottenham, though

ZeeBoi
Jan 17, 2001



https://twitter.com/paddypower/status/1422463473045417995

More on the changes: https://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/var-rules-premier-league-new-season-b1895481.html

quote:

The idea that a player has to go down to guarantee a penalty is one that has governed most of modern football, but such “streetwise” moves could be stamped out of the English game as part of a series of rule changes for the 2021/22 season, that also see “the benefit of the doubt” returned to attackers for offside decisions.

Players will be told that they will get penalties when they stay on their feet as referees and VAR are instructed to look at the nature of contact, the consequence of contact, and the intention of attackers.

The application of the offside rule has also been tweaked to try and eliminate marginal calls that come down to centimetres, with the use of the thicker “broadcast” line essentially returning the benefit of the doubt to the attacker.

the sex ghost
Sep 6, 2009




You will 100% not get a penalty if you stay on your feet lmao

CyberPingu
Sep 15, 2013


If you're not striving to improve, you'll end up going backwards.

Lol at the crying Fernandes picture

Akbar
Nov 22, 2004

Hubba-
Hubba.


CyberPingu posted:

Lol at the crying Fernandes picture

Loving Africa Chaps
Dec 3, 2007


We had not left it yet, but when I would wake in the night, I would lie, listening, homesick for it already.



:unsmith:

https://twitter.com/Arsenal/status/1422867408386072578?s=19

Akbar
Nov 22, 2004

Hubba-
Hubba.



Arsenal interns must have massive cramps from writing so many letters with their non-dominant hands

sassassin
Apr 3, 2010

If you see me posting tell me to log off and get back to work on my Teledji fanfiction!!!

#1 Teledji Adeledji fan - Monetarists Did Nothing Wrong


Wesley Fofana's leg just got snapped in a friendly.

Blasmeister
Jan 15, 2012



sassassin posted:

Wesley Fofana's leg just got snapped in a friendly.

Well, poo poo. That’s one way to keep Real Madrid away I suppose.

the sex ghost
Sep 6, 2009




Kane still hasn't showed up and apparently still hasn't phoned Nuno yet. Went on his hols to Florida which means he gets an extra five days of not training when he gets back, an inspirational bit of skiving

CyberPingu
Sep 15, 2013


If you're not striving to improve, you'll end up going backwards.

Dear Harry, I wrote to you but you still ain't callin.

Loving Africa Chaps
Dec 3, 2007


We had not left it yet, but when I would wake in the night, I would lie, listening, homesick for it already.



I won't be happy until kane turns up to the Etihad carpark on deadline day demanding to be signed

Bogan Krkic
Oct 31, 2010

Swedish style? No.
Yugoslavian style? Of course not.
It has to be Zlatan-style.



Harry Kane catching the Babelcopter to do an Odemwingie in the carpark

Jose
Jul 24, 2007





lol leeds joining in now

https://twitter.com/LUFC/status/1423179463748116483?s=20

the sex ghost
Sep 6, 2009




Fucks sake

Tsaedje
May 11, 2007

ASK ME ABOUT BEING A JOYLESS CURMUDGEON WHO CANNOT ENJOY LIFE'S SIMPLY PLEASURES LIKE EATING AN ICE CREAM WHILST HAVING A SHIT


List the plural new experiences

peanut-
Feb 17, 2004


Fun Shoe

Some dodgy investment firm that definitely don't have any money are trying to take over West Ham, with Rio Ferdinand's support for some reason

https://twitter.com/stevescott_itv/status/1423290732438118419?s=20

track day bro!
Feb 17, 2005

YES....HA HA HA...YES!

Grimey Drawer

My hopes for the season is that a thermonuclear device blows up old trafford and also small individual bombs land on every single pooshited fan, namaste

Bogan Krkic
Oct 31, 2010

Swedish style? No.
Yugoslavian style? Of course not.
It has to be Zlatan-style.



peanut- posted:

Some dodgy investment firm that definitely don't have any money are trying to take over West Ham, with Rio Ferdinand's support for some reason

https://twitter.com/stevescott_itv/status/1423290732438118419?s=20

I can't wait for them to take over the club and somehow manage to be worse than the Daves and the Icelanders, what a rush

poty
Jun 21, 2008

虹はどこで終わるのですか? あなたの魂の中で、または地平線で?


https://twitter.com/ESPNFC/status/1423359381094158338

Huh, didn't Sterling have #10?

Raffles
Dec 7, 2004




Aguero was 10.

Will be very funny when he has to give it up for Messi though.

Shrapnig
Jan 21, 2005

a real bad post



Holy poo poo those numbers are terrible.

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Dave Angel
Sep 8, 2004



Sterling is #7 apparently, Aguero was the previous #10.

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