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Where does Ben Simmons play next year?
Boston Celtics
L.A. Lakers
L.A. Clippers
Golden State Warriors
Sacramento Kings
Minnesota Timberwolves
Utah Jazz
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Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

Not just content on basically throwing his team's chances to go far in the NBA playoffs, former #1 pick and #1 overall NBA headcase Ben Simmons has decided to tell the Philadelphia 76ers front office that this past season has given him a major case of the sads and he just doesn't want to play for them anymore:

https://twitter.com/PompeyOnSixers/status/1432785688982925323

Now, surely a player who has done nothing but stagnate since his rookie season, refuses to shoot, and is due to make over 30 million dollars a season while being a stagnant player who refuses shoot should command a massive haul in any kind of a trade.

He could go to the Nets for Kyrie Irving
He could go to the Lakers for the washed-up LeBron James and inject a bit of youth into the team
Trade him to the Celtics for Jaylen Brown and a bunch of picks (who says no???)
Defense wins championships, so why not trade him to defending NBA runner-up Phoenix for Devin Booker?
He could go to the Kings and help the defending Summer League champions continue their reign of glory

The possibilities are endless. The Trade Machine is our friend here. Also comedy.

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Metapod
Mar 18, 2012

Crazy Ted posted:

Now, surely a player who has done nothing but stagnate since his rookie season, refuses to shoot, and is due to make over 30 million dollars a season while being a stagnant player who refuses shoot should command a massive haul in any kind of a trade.

John Wall did get 1 Russell Westbrook

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

Metapod posted:

John Wall did get 1 Russell Westbrook
This is very true, and it has long, long been true that every NBA contract is tradeable.

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

Real talk, he should come to Sacramento. The Young Socialite can hop on a quick jet ride to hit up San Francisco or LA night life and during the work week he can just chill and thrive in a situation where the fanbase would be absolutely thrilled to get bounced in the first round.

Bip Roberts
Mar 29, 2005
Well here's another clue for you all: the walrus was (Rich) Paul.

BWV
Feb 24, 2005


https://twitter.com/ChrisJHoops/status/1427373705508708352?s=20

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

Ben is a hero for taking Ben Shapiro to school

Rick
Feb 23, 2004
When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.
I voted for the Clippers but am not going to figure out how to make that trade possible.

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

Rick posted:

I voted for the Clippers but am not going to figure out how to make that trade possible.
Obviously you trade him for fellow playoff fraud Paul George

BWV
Feb 24, 2005


I'm embarrassed to admit it but sometimes I read /r/sixers just to get extra Ben Simmons content.

Metapod
Mar 18, 2012

BWV posted:

I'm embarrassed to admit it but sometimes I read /r/sixers just to get extra Ben Simmons content.

Brain has a bigger hole than a Ferrari engine

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

https://twitter.com/975TheFanatic/status/1432796782904422406

Ben Simmons: broken by Doc Rivers

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

looooooooool
https://twitter.com/thenbacentral/status/1432883432481230855?s=21

Vernacular
Nov 29, 2004
Fox is probably the most realistic best case scenario for Morey now right? His leverage is shot but he's better off taking a Beasley/PatBev/McDaniels/FRPs package than any sort of Hield/Bagley-centric offer, so he can at least play off that

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

It's possible Fox can be obtained but every indication from the organization and the local beat writers is that Fox is not on the table and that Monte wants to put a star next to him, not just shuffle things around

The team is in no way a contender or even good but Monte doesn't seem very inclined to trade a very good player who actually wants to be in Sacramento for Young Socialite Ben Simmons

hifi
Jul 25, 2012

http://www.espn.com/nba/tradeMachine?tradeId=yz8q35mg

too easy.

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

http://www.espn.com/nba/tradeMachine?tradeId=yg6ddgcm

Maybe lets just give this guy another try.

BWV
Feb 24, 2005


Doc said he was going to spend a lot of time in the gym with Ben. And yet he is nowhere to be found in the video evidence. Seems like he's abandoned yet another young person when they needed him most.

MourningView
Sep 2, 2006


Is this Heaven?

refusing to include either of them is pretty dumb by sacramento

Rick
Feb 23, 2004
When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.
The argument for keeping Fox makes sense from an emotional standpoint because it is a team that historically has issues getting people excited to be there and Fox loves the Kings. Talent wise though, yeah, not so much.

Forrest on Fire
Nov 23, 2012

MourningView posted:

refusing to include either of them is pretty dumb by sacramento

Especially with the Mitchell pick there's a huge overflow of prospects at the 1/2. Halliburton is not as good as Fox but I feel like he'd be the player whose shot fits best next to Embiid/Harris in Philly. Then again since they'd be including Heild that may not be all they *want*.

Philly's mishandling this well enough that I don't think the Kings are the organization most messing this up (yet).

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

I’m not thrilled with Mitchell but there is plenty of time in the backcourt to share with them given Tyrese’s versatility. And moving on from either of those two just because you have Davion Mitchell is a bad idea.

Haliburton is on a rookie deal which makes his value a lot higher than normal. He’s not as good as Simmons now but he’s cheaper and improving and doesn’t have massive holes in his game that requires specific roster building.

Lockback
Sep 3, 2006

All days are nights to see till I see thee; and nights bright days when dreams do show me thee.
I'm guessing the outcome will be something like:

Wait for Beal/Lillard to become available. Trade becomes likely a 3-4 team trade if Blazers/DC doesn't want Simmons with a team like MN/Warriors/maybe Sac throwing multiple future FRP to POR/DC as the main driver and landing Simmons.

Beal/Lillard are not available by, say, 2nd week of the season:
Fall back to Sac or maybe Indiana offer, string along MN and Warriors to get more picks for a future move. Houston might be telling Sac not to name anyone outside of Hield right now regardless.

I think like the Harden trade this probably doesn't happen for a while unless a superstar-tier guy starts throwing a fit.

triple sulk
Sep 17, 2014



I'm so loving tired of this

MourningView
Sep 2, 2006


Is this Heaven?

WhyteRyce posted:

I’m not thrilled with Mitchell but there is plenty of time in the backcourt to share with them given Tyrese’s versatility. And moving on from either of those two just because you have Davion Mitchell is a bad idea.

you're not giving up on them just for fun or something you are using them to acquire a significantly better player than either of them

Nodoze
Aug 17, 2006

If it's only for a night I can live without you
Voted GSW, but :iiam:

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

MourningView posted:

you're not giving up on them just for fun or something you are using them to acquire a significantly better player than either of them

Simmons is a significantly better and more impactful defender, passer, and has better size and is a problem is transition. But the appeal for teams like GS, Sacramento, or Minnesota is putting him next to their core not to replace it.

Simmons is a complete non factor in the half court. If you replace Fox with Simmons, where does your half court offense come from? It’s not coming from Simmons or Holmes or Barnes or Hield, so you’re putting a lot of pressure on Haliburton to be a lead playmaker there which I thought everyone knew was not going to be his ticket to success. Replace Haliburton with Simmons and you’ve got a half court lineup with really bad spacing for Fox and no real secondary playmaker or grease guy unless you think Mitchell can step into that role. And the Kings don’t really have any assets to fill that out.

He’s a better player but his limitations mean you can’t just do a straight swap and assume the team comes out ahead.

Metapod
Mar 18, 2012
I don't think the kings should give fox up for Simmons because fox is a very good player who wants to be there and that's a big deal

MourningView
Sep 2, 2006


Is this Heaven?
The trade said they wouldn't consider giving up either of them and not wanting to swap Haliburton for a genuine star level talent is insanely stupid. It's a lot easier to find guys who can make a jump shot to put around them than it is to find guys who can do everything Simmons does and at some point the team has to play defense too if they're going to be any good. Just refusing to budge from a core that probably tops out at like the tenth best team in the west is bizarre. It's not like you're breaking up a team that looks like it's on the verge of being a contender.

Ammanas
Jul 17, 2005

Voltes V: "Laser swooooooooord!"
I'd love to see simmons on gsw but dont want gsw to give up anything to get him. i want cake and eat cake also

creamcorn
Oct 26, 2007

automatic gun for fast, continuous firing
why would sacramento trade for simmons? they already have marvin bagley at the 3.

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

MourningView posted:

The trade said they wouldn't consider giving up either of them and not wanting to swap Haliburton for a genuine star level talent is insanely stupid. It's a lot easier to find guys who can make a jump shot to put around them than it is to find guys who can do everything Simmons does and at some point the team has to play defense too if they're going to be any good. Just refusing to budge from a core that probably tops out at like the tenth best team in the west is bizarre. It's not like you're breaking up a team that looks like it's on the verge of being a contender.

It’s not so much fretting about breaking up the core of a bad team, it’s that they really don’t have a good roster to put around Simmons if either Fox or Haliburton are out and little avenues left to do so. It’s a ton of money to commit and Simmons isn’t a player you can just put some low salary shooters around and think you’ve got a good team

Metapod
Mar 18, 2012

WhyteRyce posted:

It’s not so much fretting about breaking up the core of a bad team, it’s that they really don’t have a good roster to put around Simmons if either Fox or Haliburton are out and little avenues left to do so. It’s a ton of money to commit and Simmons isn’t a player you can just put some low salary shooters around and think you’ve got a good team

Are we sure about this though

a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


Until Seth Curry the best shooting talent next to Ben Simmons was a 100 year old JJ Redick

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

If you just toss the ball to Simmons in the half court and ask him to cook you’re going to end up with a cold Totinos party pizza

R.D. Mangles
Jan 10, 2004


do you think that ben simmons will bring dumb ben simmons drama with him wherever he goes or is all of the ben simmons drama directly related to dealing with the most deranged fanbase in american sports

Kibner
Oct 21, 2008

#1 Pelican Fan

R.D. Mangles posted:

do you think that ben simmons will bring dumb ben simmons drama with him wherever he goes or is all of the ben simmons drama directly related to dealing with the most deranged fanbase in american sports

Probably bring it with him. Like Rondo, Jimmer, and Lonzo when they were Pels.

WhyteRyce
Dec 30, 2001

Sacramento got into a tizzy when Webber complained there was no good soul food here so I’m excited at the prospect of what would happen with Simmons

Lockback
Sep 3, 2006

All days are nights to see till I see thee; and nights bright days when dreams do show me thee.
Simmons has the 13th highest Ast/possession rate in the NBA, and while some of that is in transition most of it is because he is a terror moving towards the hoop and can open up a ton on offense. He's can also operate out of the perimeter or down low, and that makes him tough to guard on offense!

He also has a slightly higher usage rate than average, which is low for a star player but the idea that he never takes shots is flat out wrong.

He's also, like, mostly quiet and boring to the media? So I am not sure what drama he's going to be bringing with him. I think it's time to maybe not just tell the same 2 jokes about Simmons.

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Dejan Bimble
Mar 24, 2008

we're all black friends
Plaster Town Cop
Is there a team that's a logical fit for Ben Simmons? Is there a team that doesn't mind having their first or second highest paid player be a nonentity on offense when the pressure is on?

The Pistons won a championship with Ben Wallace only dunking and making every other free throw, imagine if Ben just played point center. That would be sick.

This isn't Ben's fault. He's been mentally coddled and treated like a god since he was a teen, but in the weird australian way that makes people crack under pressure. He needs to do some kind of age regression therapy and have draymond green's parents re-raise him over the course of a year.

Dejan Bimble fucked around with this message at 03:56 on Sep 2, 2021

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