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take the moon



now u will see how deep the rabbit hole goes

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take the moon



morpheus in the digital pill pharmacy talking to the pharmacist: wait so this way it absorbs more effectively? cant take chances with The One


sig by nesamdoom
sig gob by khanstant

Stoner Sloth



turns out this whole 'matrix' business was hallucinations caused by your severe prostatitis

bad guy



take the moon posted:

now u will see how deep the rabbit hole goes

take the moon



every time zion is destroyed, a new One is born. that ones DNA reverse-crisprs the matrix computers to choose a self-projection with an absolutely phat rear end


sig by nesamdoom
sig gob by khanstant

bad guy



slow release red pill suppository so you have time to get used to bullet time

bad guy



morpheus: you can take the blue pill, that's an oral pill, or you can take the red pill, by putting it up your butt

neo: can i put the blue pill up my butt?

morpheus: no

neo: *sighs* ok i guess i'll take the red pill then

take the moon



bad guy posted:

slow release red pill suppository so you have time to get used to bullet time

lol


sig by nesamdoom
sig gob by khanstant

take the moon



cypher: yea make me forget about the matrix. i wanna be a rockstar. also make my butt like, way tiny

Viginti Septem

revertere ad avem tribuum

Gosh, I hate to humblebrag but, I think I saw this coming.



"Everything that has a beginning, has an end."
-The Oracle

Stoner Sloth



bad guy posted:

slow release red pill suppository so you have time to get used to bullet time

neo: what are you trying to tell me? that i can dodge bullets?
m: no, neo. im trying to tell you that when you're ready, you won't have to.

*later*

neo: *opens butt and swallows the bullets fired at him in dramatic goatse style*

Stoner Sloth



innocent millenial accidentally eats the red pill while just trying to have a good itme

Stoner Sloth



m: he IS the bum!
t: well no poo poo dick tracyeus, been telling you that the whole time plus he's literally called 'umb'... d-do you not know what an anagram is?

Lock


Stoner Sloth posted:

m: he IS the bum!
t: well no poo poo dick tracyeus, been telling you that the whole time plus he's literally called 'umb'... d-do you not know what an anagram is?

...dammit today is the day I realized one is an anagram for neo

i am too dumb for this otherwise awesome thread and will bow out



huge love to Tiny Myers for the fall '21 sig!

Stoner Sloth



Lock posted:

...dammit today is the day I realized one is an anagram for neo

i am too dumb for this otherwise awesome thread and will bow out

lol no way my orb... anyway get ready to have you're mind blown dum is just mud spelled backwards *hands you a red pill* now hit this poo poo and have some fun! uh... you're gonna want some lube.

google THIS



Neo: (walking funny) There is no spoon, there is no spoon...

Oracle: Why the hell does my silverware keep disappearing?

Stoner Sloth



google THIS posted:

Neo: (walking funny) There is no spoon, there is no spoon...

Oracle: Why the hell does my silverware keep disappearing?

whoa

Lock


Stoner Sloth posted:

lol no way my orb... anyway get ready to have you're mind blown dum is just mud spelled backwards *hands you a red pill* now hit this poo poo and have some fun! uh... you're gonna want some lube.

how did you know my name

google THIS posted:

Neo: (walking funny) There is no spoon, there is no spoon...

Oracle: Why the hell does my silverware keep disappearing?



huge love to Tiny Myers for the fall '21 sig!

your friend sk

(ヤイケス!)




i know bung fu


thank you Pot Smoke Phoenix!


Add to your sig if you're a proud supporter of Local 69!
Check out my Retired Sig Parade!


share your shame here

Viginti Septem

revertere ad avem tribuum

your friend sk posted:

i know bung fu

Show me

google THIS



Virus Smith still uses the same gesture to infect people, he just hits a slightly different spot

Heather Papps


hello internet friend




"yah i made this training program where you can re-experiance putting the red pill up your butt over and over and over again. what do you mean, why?"


i'm nuts about fall

Finger Prince

"I think he's watching us..."

"No, it's just the Mountain Peeks."
(Source)



There is no spoon. It's really more of a speculum.

google THIS



Neo: How about I give you the finger, and you let me take a bathroom break?

Smith: Tell me, Mr. Anderson, what good is a bathroom break, when you are unable to poop?

Neo: :eek:

Abugadu

1st Sgt. Matthews and the men have Procured for me a cummerbund from a traveling gypsy, who screeched Victory shall come at a Terrible price. i am Honored.

Remember, all Iím offering is a boof. Nothing more.

empty whippet box

friendship


*sticks pill up butt* I know kung fu

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

Take the brown pill.

Stoner Sloth



Morpheus: Lol, told you i could get him to do it

magic cactus

We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

morpheus (*straining as he does kegels*): what is the matrix? control.




https://giant.gfycat.com/GrimySilverGermanpinscher.mp4

https://i.imgur.com/c5aCy61.mp4

Fall 2021 sig courtesy of Tiny Myers
Summer 2021 sig by the amazing deep dish peat moss!
Spring 2021 sig brought to you by Pot Smoke Phoenix
Winter 2020 sig by my favorite alt account Prof. Crocodile!
Fall 2020 sig by BYOB's own living legend, Nut!
Spring 2020 sig by the one-and-only Heather Papps!
Summer 2020 sig by Pot Smoke Phoenix!

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

Were you listening to me Neo or were you looking at the women in the red dress?

Neo: What?

Look again.

[it's a bottom]

magic cactus

We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

the Merovingian is seated at the table of a swanky french restaurant:

M: Look there, at that woman. I have sent her a desert. It is a very... special desert. I wrote it myself. It starts so simply, each line of the program creating a new effect. It is like... poetry.
First, a rush. Heat. The heart flutters. You can see it, yes? She does not understand why. Is it the wine? Non. What is it, what is the reason? Soon it does not matter. Soon the why and the reason are gone, and all that matters is the feeling itself. And this is the nature of the universe. We struggle against it, we fight to deny it, but it is of course pretense, it is a lie. Beneath our poised appearance, the truth is we are completely out of control.

Woman: *violently shits herself*




https://giant.gfycat.com/GrimySilverGermanpinscher.mp4

https://i.imgur.com/c5aCy61.mp4

Fall 2021 sig courtesy of Tiny Myers
Summer 2021 sig by the amazing deep dish peat moss!
Spring 2021 sig brought to you by Pot Smoke Phoenix
Winter 2020 sig by my favorite alt account Prof. Crocodile!
Fall 2020 sig by BYOB's own living legend, Nut!
Spring 2020 sig by the one-and-only Heather Papps!
Summer 2020 sig by Pot Smoke Phoenix!

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

Morpheus farts.

What is a fart neo? Modern neurology explains that it's just signals interpreted through your brain.

Lock


magic cactus posted:

the Merovingian is seated at the table of a swanky french restaurant:

M: Look there, at that woman. I have sent her a desert. It is a very... special desert. I wrote it myself. It starts so simply, each line of the program creating a new effect. It is like... poetry.
First, a rush. Heat. The heart flutters. You can see it, yes? She does not understand why. Is it the wine? Non. What is it, what is the reason? Soon it does not matter. Soon the why and the reason are gone, and all that matters is the feeling itself. And this is the nature of the universe. We struggle against it, we fight to deny it, but it is of course pretense, it is a lie. Beneath our poised appearance, the truth is we are completely out of control.

Woman: *violently shits herself*



huge love to Tiny Myers for the fall '21 sig!

empty whippet box

friendship


magic cactus posted:

the Merovingian is seated at the table of a swanky french restaurant:

M: Look there, at that woman. I have sent her a desert. It is a very... special desert. I wrote it myself. It starts so simply, each line of the program creating a new effect. It is like... poetry.
First, a rush. Heat. The heart flutters. You can see it, yes? She does not understand why. Is it the wine? Non. What is it, what is the reason? Soon it does not matter. Soon the why and the reason are gone, and all that matters is the feeling itself. And this is the nature of the universe. We struggle against it, we fight to deny it, but it is of course pretense, it is a lie. Beneath our poised appearance, the truth is we are completely out of control.

Woman: *violently shits herself*

i'll have what she's having, waiter

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

take the moon



magic cactus posted:

the Merovingian is seated at the table of a swanky french restaurant:

M: Look there, at that woman. I have sent her a desert. It is a very... special desert. I wrote it myself. It starts so simply, each line of the program creating a new effect. It is like... poetry.
First, a rush. Heat. The heart flutters. You can see it, yes? She does not understand why. Is it the wine? Non. What is it, what is the reason? Soon it does not matter. Soon the why and the reason are gone, and all that matters is the feeling itself. And this is the nature of the universe. We struggle against it, we fight to deny it, but it is of course pretense, it is a lie. Beneath our poised appearance, the truth is we are completely out of control.

Woman: *violently shits herself*


sig by nesamdoom
sig gob by khanstant

Nosfereefer



(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Nosfereefer



in the first version of the matrix, they left out farting. turns out humans are not capable to deal with life without farts. it was mayhem

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

The original idea was that the machines were using the processing power of human brains. So perhaps they left out the farts because the human uses so much processing power perceiving the parts (the medula flatulonganglia) that it was too tempting not to do it.

empty whippet box

friendship


I can stop farting?

When you're ready, you won't have to.

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

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vanisher





Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Tiny Myers, & Death Sext

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