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SRQ
Nov 9, 2009





Gentlemen, we are being given 2 trillion dollars to dam the Gulf of Mexico and drain it. I want ideas. Jim, your wife lives in Florida- what do you think?

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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008


Nap Ghost

SRQ posted:



Gentlemen, we are being given 2 trillion dollars to dam the Gulf of Mexico and drain it. I want ideas. Jim, your wife lives in Florida- what do you think?

why?

SRQ
Nov 9, 2009




what kind of philosophical question is that? That's now what I'm paying you for!

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008


Nap Ghost

and how are we supposed to dam it? To let water into the gulf or stop it?

SRQ
Nov 9, 2009



Mumpy Puffinz posted:

and how are we supposed to dam it? To let water into the gulf or stop it?

I said drain didn't I? Pay attention and put your drat phone away Puffinz. I'm writing you up.

XeeD
Jul 9, 2001
I see invisible dumptrucks.

Gonna need some lumber, a couple crates of beer, some buckets, and a few expensive whores to suck start the siphon when its time to drain it.

SRQ
Nov 9, 2009



XeeD posted:

Gonna need some lumber, a couple crates of beer, some buckets, and a few expensive whores to suck start the siphon when its time to drain it.

Alright now this guy has the right loving idea. I'm budgeting you 200 billion, get to work.

Sid Vicious
Jan 1, 1970

A dick, but the biggest dick in the universe. No, bigger than the universe.

i saw we hire a lot of guys to drink it all up with straws

20 Blunts
Jan 21, 2017


hey im the Director of Diversity & Inclusiveness for the Gulf of Mexico Dam Project, let me know if anything related to maternal mental health care comes up ill be on the call

RepeatingMeme
Dec 27, 2012

Have u seen thos pig balls tho







Dam it you guys

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD

Let's say we need 3 trillion, not build it, and then move to Mexico.

Supreme Allah
Oct 6, 2004

everybody relax, i'm here


Nap Ghost

2 big reverse vacuums that drown florida + texas

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008


Nap Ghost

Funky See Funky Do posted:

Let's say we need 3 trillion, not build it, and then move to Mexico.

Im from Philly. Gonna move to Toronto.

XeeD
Jul 9, 2001
I see invisible dumptrucks.

SRQ posted:

Alright now this guy has the right loving idea. I'm budgeting you 200 billion, get to work.

Next Thursday good for you?

SRQ
Nov 9, 2009



Funky See Funky Do posted:

Let's say we need 3 trillion, not build it, and then move to Mexico.

now listen here you sumbitch I'm retiring in a year and I want this to be my legacy.

SRQ
Nov 9, 2009



XeeD posted:

Next Thursday good for you?

gently caress yeah it does get r done.

Sid Vicious
Jan 1, 1970

A dick, but the biggest dick in the universe. No, bigger than the universe.

we make the gulf of meixco into an hug ebong!

Yaldabaoth
Oct 9, 2012

I bring my hyperbolic handwringing into every thread I can! No matter how tangential the topic, I'll shoehorn it in there.


Someone already came up with the idea to do this with the Mediterranean Sea but he was a Nazi:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBE8VPAfl7E

So you've accidentally created another Hitler thread, you imbecile.

Sid Vicious
Jan 1, 1970

A dick, but the biggest dick in the universe. No, bigger than the universe.

nazis shouldnt be allowed to have weed imo

Yaldabaoth
Oct 9, 2012

I bring my hyperbolic handwringing into every thread I can! No matter how tangential the topic, I'll shoehorn it in there.


Sid Vicious posted:

nazis shouldnt be allowed to have weed imo

Maybe if they had enough weed they wouldn't have tried to genocide the rest of the world.

XeeD
Jul 9, 2001
I see invisible dumptrucks.

SRQ posted:

gently caress yeah it does get r done.

Sounds good. I'll see if I can't pick up my nephew down in Cancun, he says he should be able to get us a discount on the lumber, plus he's pretty good with a hammer.

SRQ
Nov 9, 2009



Yaldabaoth posted:

Someone already came up with the idea to do this with the Mediterranean Sea but he was a Nazi:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBE8VPAfl7E

So you've accidentally created another Hitler thread, you imbecile.

you idiot where do you think I got the idea from.
"let's do that but stupider".

Vampire Panties
Apr 18, 2001

Congratulations on not getting fit on Sunday, dumbass!



Nap Ghost

Gotta think outside the box here. Building a thousand mile sea wall that goes up to 14k feet deep isn't feasible.

Instead, we need to raise the sea floor so that all the water drains out. As a start, I propose bulldozing Florida directly into the Gulf.

DeadFatDuckFat
Oct 29, 2012

This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.




I punch the gulf

Really hard

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD

SRQ posted:

now listen here you sumbitch I'm retiring in a year and I want this to be my legacy.

Alright well then I'm going to bid 1 trillion for the contract and then move to Mexico. Enjoy your legacy of being the guy who failed to pull off the greatest boondoggle in history.

Schweinhund
Oct 23, 2004

:derp:   :kayak:                                     


make a giant inflatable rubber dam

Away all Goats
Jul 5, 2005

Goose's rebellion


Hear me out: the worlds biggest sponge

Yaldabaoth
Oct 9, 2012

I bring my hyperbolic handwringing into every thread I can! No matter how tangential the topic, I'll shoehorn it in there.


SRQ posted:

you idiot where do you think I got the idea from.
"let's do that but stupider".

And you can't even build a dam that's connected to anywhere in the southeastern United States because it's all mangroves instead of solid land.

Novo
May 13, 2003

Stercorem pro cerebro habes

Soiled Meat

have ben shapiro try to make it horny

corgski
Feb 6, 2007



Listen I called our suppliers and they said we can't get that much concrete until next year at the earliest, said that they're out of sand. Who the hell runs out of sand!?

Wall Balls
Jun 3, 2007

Spanish Castle Magic



cape canaveral is right there, simply send the water into outer space

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008


Nap Ghost

corgski posted:

Listen I called our suppliers and they said we can't get that much concrete until next year at the earliest, said that they're out of sand. Who the hell runs out of sand!?

New Jersey?

SRQ
Nov 9, 2009



corgski posted:

Listen I called our suppliers and they said we can't get that much concrete until next year at the earliest, said that they're out of sand. Who the hell runs out of sand!?

we'll use paper mache instead.

Wifi Toilet
Oct 1, 2004



Toilet Rascal

Throw the guys from Chippendales in the middle of the Gulf. They're so hot that the water will turn to steam and evaporate.

If that doesn't work, throw the guys from Thunder from Down Under in the ocean too.

If that still doesn't work, just keep throwing hot guys into the ocean until it does work.

Boner M
Sep 21, 2021
Probation
Can't post for 29 days!


Simply nuke parts of it so the crater wall rises out of the sea and dams those areas

The Voice of Labor
Apr 8, 2020



put a huge jack right where the x in mexico is on the map and jack up the gulf until all the water runs off. has the added bonus of possibly flooding texas and florida

The Voice of Labor
Apr 8, 2020



any questions there chief? 'cause I got five more boondoggles to resolve before lunch

Lord Decimus Barnacle
Jun 25, 2005




Hell Gem

Why donít we just pump all the water to space

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008


Nap Ghost

Lord Decimus Barnacle posted:

Why donít we just pump all the water to space

because that would be stupid.

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Lord Decimus Barnacle
Jun 25, 2005




Hell Gem

So should we pump it to the core then?

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