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teen witch
writing this now so I donít forget

- an Anton LaVey lookalike* was pursuing me while out on a walk. we got weird with it, and his uh, security detail. real courteous fellas

- but was rudely interrupted by some sort of angry mob at a government building. we looked and somehow I banged on a door once that was made of whatever Chris Farley used to pratfall through

- somehow after that I was in South America trying to help a group of people we poo poo (my Spanish is bad and was taught with a European focus, AND Iíve never been to South America). somehow I was topless with a blazer on and tbh I might investigate that look cause it looked kinda cool.

- a middle aged man kept making eyes at me but kept trying to shield his son to not do that. I offered a brother and sister a kitten; they named it Thunk


and then I woke up to my cats wanting FOOD NOW

*it was likely just Anton LaVey however my particular flavor of satanism is being petty

teen witch fucked around with this message at 08:29 on Dec 31, 2021

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Farecoal

There he go
I was part of a heist crew working for this terrible boss. To escape with our latest loot we had to go through a maze composed of conservative political cartoons. At one dead end we ran into an animated cartoon which depicted a young boy who was terrified that he was gay. He was encouraged to "eject his sin" by a priest and his parents, otherwise he might be executed by higher-ups in the church. And then the dream ended! :amen:

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

I dreamt I was Dr. Who and I got really drunk and mined a guy's house with antimatter bombs as a prank.

Farecoal

There he go

Drink-Mix Man posted:

I dreamt I was Dr. Who and I got really drunk and mined a guy's house with antimatter bombs as a prank.

I would watch this episode

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
I had a dream where the original Cowboy Bebop was a card game anime based in a high school and was really low quality.

Viginti Septem

Oculus Noctuae
Michael Keaton and I were hanging out in a clothing store taking selfies and ruffling each other's hair and stuff like that.

Viginti Septem

Oculus Noctuae
Sorry for the bad formatting, just woke up, wanted to get this jotted down.

Childhood neighborhood, came upon a huge patch of all varieties of shrooms, very colorful. Starting plucking them and shaking their seed all over other people's lawn like I was doing the bidding of the mushrooms to help them spread further. A few of the shrooms under some huge bush turned into really colorful alligators at one point and I was like ooh I need to get some pics of these up close. I broke out the phone and started setting up some great shots of the alligator heads before someone else was like get the gently caress outta here those are alligators and I almost got attacked.

teen witch
all I remember was looking for new plugs for my ears. itís been on my to do list, as mine are currently mismatched, but not in size for once.

kalel

I don't remember enough of this one to put in my personal diary but I do want to write it down. I went to an arcade and approached one of the machines. some guy, probably somebody who worked there, told me it was broken and it'll eat my coins. I said "ok" and then immediately tried to stick a coin in it. the guy looked at me and said condescendingly "I just said it was broken dude" and rolled his eyes before walking away. for some reason this made me incredibly angry at myself for being such a dumbass, and I was going to direct my anger at him by telling him off but I controlled myself and calmed down. I felt really ashamed at how quick to anger I was and how I was prepared to harass this guy for no good reason. A bunch of other stuff happened but I don't remember most of it

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

Viginti Septem posted:

Sorry for the bad formatting, just woke up, wanted to get this jotted down.

Childhood neighborhood, came upon a huge patch of all varieties of shrooms, very colorful. Starting plucking them and shaking their seed all over other people's lawn like I was doing the bidding of the mushrooms to help them spread further. A few of the shrooms under some huge bush turned into really colorful alligators at one point and I was like ooh I need to get some pics of these up close. I broke out the phone and started setting up some great shots of the alligator heads before someone else was like get the gently caress outta here those are alligators and I almost got attacked.

Oh no. You just stirred an old British memory long thought lost.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RE9yA9BfQB4

Finger Prince


I can't find the weird stuff that pops in your head immediately after waking up thread so I'll post this here instead.

Irish schoolgirl superhero - Shillelagh Moon

Farecoal

There he go
A two part dream!

  1. A short one from a third person perspective. A femme fatale character was locked up on a space station controlled by Darth Maul. She manages to escape, finds a powered exosuit, and defeats Maul. She then ties him up, sets the station to self-destruct, and gives him one chance to escape by taking a tiny spaceship and dangling it at the very top of the station before escaping herself.

  2. I was a combination cat and car salesman. A woman with a very large face came in and asked about some kind of surgery to reduce her face size. I convinced her to adopt a cat instead. I went to her home to figure out what kind of cat she should get, and saw she didn't have a car! It turned out her husband was a wealthy man, and I took their family to see a line of British-made cars. They decided on some horribly ugly new model (it looked sort of like the Batmobile) that could split into two halves. They took the front half home, while me and some of the other staff followed behind in the back half. We missed the turnoff onto their street, so we tried turning onto the next street. Turns out it was filled with monsters! We managed to get out using the car's built in weaponry but the outside had been horribly damaged. We finally got to the client's house and tried to hastily repair the damage, but to no avail. The family came out and saw what had happened, decided to never use the combination cat shelter car dealership again, and I was fired from my job.

frump truck

hello... again!

i had a dream that i made out with my coworker and also an old grad school classmate died

(i do not harbor any desire for this coworker, nor had i thought about the grad school classmate for 7 years, so these were both Surprising Events)

frump truck fucked around with this message at 20:36 on Jan 22, 2022

Buttchocks

No, I like my hat, thanks.
Dreamt that Sarah Silverman started doing housekeeping for my parents in between her stand-up gigs. She got along well with my parents, but did not think any of my jokes were funny.

Finger Prince


I dreamed i was living in a house somewhere and it was autumn and there was a big tree in the yard that shed all its leaves, and it had been raining so the leaves were all sopping wet, so I couldn't use a leaf blower and had to rake all these rotten wet leaves up, and I was only really doing it to stop my neighbor tut-tutting about the state of the yard. And it wasn't even my place, it was a rental, and I didn't really like it there, but my sense of obligation forced me to engage in the crummy task of raking.
I don't know what it means but I can't imagine living in a house basically ever unless I can retire early and move somewhere where they don't cost millions of dollars or $4000/mo to rent.

Heather Papps

hello friend


my parents became pig farmers, but the pigs grew new pigs inside them. the big pig was a pea pod, and you could open them up to find a bunch of smaller pigs suckling on some sort of interior teat.

my mother was rough with the pigs.



thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

The Hello Machine

I'm not a real machine, but I am a real Hello-sayer.
I had a dream about my work day today and then I had to get up and go to work for real :(

Finger Prince


I had a dream about butts. I don't think it was specifically about butts, but butts did feature prominently.
Scratch that, it was almost entirely specifically about butts.

Finger Prince


I just woke up from an extremely detailed dream in which I found a sick, possibly dying penguin that I saved and rehabbed back from the brink. I couldn't understand why it couldn't eat the little pieces of fish I was trying to feed it, then I found a very detailed journal from a guy who had retired from my work that detailed all the sea creatures he had seen locally, and somehow from that I found out there might be an obstruction in its mouth. I was able to pry open its mouth and it was all glued shut with tarry crude oil. Then with tweezers I was able to pull out most of this plug of tar (it was kind of like the consistency of marshmallow), and then I held the penguin upside down with its mouth open and it managed to vomit out all the foul oil inside it. I was then able to feed it pieces of fish so it would have the energy to survive and catch fish for itself. It was very greatful to me for saving it. I think I may have explained to it about the oil slick and to avoid that stuff if it sees it again.

Farecoal

There he go
:lovebird:

Farecoal

There he go
I was teleported to a desolate section of Alaskan coast so I could walk to a house where I was supposed to be pet sitting. Along the way I got followed by three lynx-like creatures called Salishes. When I finally got to the house, they charged in as soon as I opened the screen door and beelined for the aquarium. They took this one fish out and started ripping it apart. I was able to chase them off before they could do more damage, and somehow the fish was still alive. I was trying to nurse it back to health in the house's gigantic kitchen sink when the dream ended.

The Hello Machine

I'm not a real machine, but I am a real Hello-sayer.
I had a dream that I was grocery shopping with my family and I was having no trouble finding all the stuff I wanted and the groceries were all incredibly easy to carry even though I had a lot. Then I passed the cleaning supplies and I was spending a while trying to think if there was anything in this aisle I was running low on and then my mom knocked over a can of insecticide that started spraying all over the place and I didn't want to breathe in any of the spray so I decided I'll find cleaning supplies some other time and went to go look at the potatoes instead.

The Hello Machine

I'm not a real machine, but I am a real Hello-sayer.
I also had a dream where I went to the bar with my friends but I was sad because they didn't have any drinks I liked

kalel

I had a dream a few nights ago I was watching a romantic comedy set in the star wars universe during the events of empire strikes back about two star crossed rebel pilots. like a kind of rosencrantz and guildenstern are dead except they're gay lovers and one of them is an alien. it was the best star wars movie since the ot

frump truck

hello... again!

I had a dream that there was a famous pizza place with huge lines all the time except the guy who worked there always had one hand on his dick. not even in a lascivious way, that's just where he kept his hand while he made pizza with his other hand

Farecoal

There he go
The Gloop: A podcast where gloops are reviewed. What's a gloop? I don't know!

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
An egg with legs that transports you to the land of the dead.

Finger Prince


Prurient Squid posted:

An egg with legs that transports you to the land of the dead.

That's what you get for eating deviled eggs before bed.

nitsuga

Finger Prince posted:

That's what you get for eating deviled eggs before bed.

better than the smelly sheets.

biosterous




i forget the context but there was some music playing that was like a mashup of a bunch of different songs playing at once. it was definitely a mess. and then i was like "hmm, ooh" and spouse was like "ok but how about you not experiment with getting really into this music" and i replied "ok, but i just want to say that some of the parts mix together just right or just wrong to make my brain feel good" and they responded "hmm."

it was one of the most realistic, true-to-life conversations i've ever had in a dream



thank you saoshyant for this sig!!!
gallery of sigs


he/him

Farecoal

There he go
"Mike Democracy" (that's it)

biosterous




we got an email at work from one client complaining that it wasn't fair that her brother's pics were better than her pics. but she didn't smile for any of her pics and scowled for a bunch of them so i don't think it was our fault actually!



thank you saoshyant for this sig!!!
gallery of sigs


he/him

kalel

Farecoal posted:

"Mike Democracy" (that's it)

something like this?

Farecoal

There he go

kalel posted:

something like this?



:hai: "that's it" was my own commentary but I love it as a slogan

kalel

I know lol, it just fit so well

biosterous




reading the ingredient list on two frozen foods. the first was non-vegan and had ingredients like "mozzarella food" and "breading food". the second has vegan and had ingredients like "food ammunition" and "nuggets ammunition"



thank you saoshyant for this sig!!!
gallery of sigs


he/him

Farecoal

There he go
My mom bought all the internet infrastructure in our city. I got very upset at her and told her that it should be publicly owned by the community and we got into a screaming match about. Honestly not much different from real life

How Wonderful!


I only have excellent ideas
I dreamt I was turning into a Star Wars alien called a weequay. I had heard the name weequay online but did not know what they looked like but I assumed it was ugly so I fled and laid my face on the ground as I felt it transforming. I was tremendously frightened to be ugly forever and scary looking. I heard everyone around me gasping in horror.

When Bingo Bango woke up the next morning for real she said I had gotten out of bed and was sleeping on the ground with my face buried in a mound of sweaters. Later on I looked up what a weequay looks like. It looks like this:


Could be worse.





-sig by Manifisto! goblin by Khanstant! News and possum by deep dish peat moss!

nitsuga

I was riding my old green bike with a bunch of randos, and at the end I crashed into some people on as tandem bike. I saw some change on the ground but they started putting me back on my bike. i rolled over them and got the change.Two quarters and a dime

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biosterous




i was looking at a list of bounties in a game and the top one was a big "DANGEROUS: MOST WANTED" and it was a chair.

and then before i could react in the dream, my spouse woke me up by sleep-talking a very exasperated "seriously???"



thank you saoshyant for this sig!!!
gallery of sigs


he/him

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