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Nyello teen witch here and I copied and subsequently pasted the last first post in the previous r/r thread. Rules might be updated…ehhh when we get to it. Hello ladies and gents! This is version [REDACTED] of r/relationships. The previous thread is a little bloated so it's time to start things anew. It also allows for a jumping in point for people who are intimidated by length of the last one. Despite being named r/relationships thread, the purview of the thread has extended past just that subreddit; even so there are a few things to remember just like the last thread: 1) Don't touch the poop. 2) Try not to go on pages long derails about your superior sex life. 3) Don't talk about how cool your relationships or sex life is; no one cares. 4) Don't defend pedophilia. Just don't. 5) Don't post rape/abuse stories. Abuse of person or animal, sexual, physical or emotional. Derails: accidentsderails will happen, sometimes organically! Some are positive, fun and occasionally sexy tangents. Others are soul sucking slap fights that bring out the worst traits posters and those are the derails we strive to curb. Minds are made up, mouths are undone. With that, if I or another fool that’s an IK request a ceasefire on a derail, it isn’t for a probefest, but if it’s a probefest you want, it’s one you’ll get. I believe in giving someone a fair shot, but if you ignore a warning and get a sixer…I don’t want to hear it cause I know what I’ve done. Fake stories: yeah some of these are some clown college attempts at writing. I don’t want every page filled with “FAKE. PHONY” so calm down Holden Caulfield. If it’s something you can hilariously debunk (like for instance, someone saying an event took place on Feb 31st), that’s fine. But if crying fake gets excessive or it’s the only drat thing being posted, I’ll enforce the “post another drat thing, then” rule. I presume that this is a self explanatory rule. Other things to keep in mind: goons are, and have always been, rather diverse and of all spots and stripes. This is more apparent in a post-Lowtax era and honestly? Good. I urge you to be cognizant of that in this thread. How you act upon that is your own choice, but understand that some people won’t have the same experience as you and that poo poo happens. You may have a bit more needed to understand them, or conversely, other goons might not (or obstinately refuse to) get it. Have as much patience as needed or deserved. Some goons can, will, and want to learn and grow. Others will cling to their mudpit of idiocy as they know of nothing more and insist on making you a resident there. Expend energy accordingly, but if you need a second pair of eyes, don’t hesitate to DM me or email me at someawfulwitch at geemale dawt calm. I don’t have access to mod reports so that is usually the most expedient way of getting my attention outside of the Cuervo gold and the fine Columbian. wise bards once said “you and me baby ain’t nothing but mammals, so let’s do it like they do on the discovery channel (build and document a thriving ecosystem of goons in their tall begoatsed towers, mocking redditors below for a laugh)” If you don't like the thread title, please ask Pope Corky the IX or myself to change it. Here's a big ol list of stories collected from the thread. Current thread title origin: I. DID. NOT. YELL. AT. GRANDMA. https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3982535&perpage=40&noseen=1#post518618189 https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3982535&perpage=40&noseen=1&pagenumber=170#post519540183 teen witch fucked around with this message at 05:05 on Mar 11, 2023 |
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Oct 20, 2021 03:51
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whoop bring on all the dysfunctionals! kntfkr posted:Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat. *ahem* boom. blight rhino fucked around with this message at 04:34 on Oct 20, 2021 |
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Oct 20, 2021 03:54
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postin in the forum's trashiest thread 
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Oct 20, 2021 03:54
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Oct 20, 2021 03:55
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Less talking more poly cheese bags I hope everybody in the comments finds Jesus Arsenic Lupin posted:Wowza. I understand that is tied to a deeply traumatic event, however I Soylent Pudding posted:AITA for throwing my boyfriend a surprise party? I. DID. NOT. YELL. AT. GRANDMA. Invisible Clergy posted:AITA for blowing up at my grandma? Im not sure how exactly to feed the cat Gnossiennes posted:AITA for yelling at my obsessed wife Pam is NOT to apply margarine to any of her coworkers Hellblazer187 posted:UPDATE: aita for perpetuating stereotypes about Jorts? Im sorry why are you marrying a man that pissed on your head Sisal Two-Step posted:AITA for kicking MIL's stepdaughter out of my wedding? My teeth will regrow! I am sharklike and powerful! Arsenic Lupin posted:AITA for hiding embarrassing notes in my house as a joke because I know my fiance's mom snoops? The Three Vibrator Problem Mx. posted:I gave my partner three vibrators – now she is addicted to them and I feel redundant we kiss every few weeks and she doesn't hate it I think Boba Pearl posted:Me (F28) with my ace partner (F26) of five years. Should I remove my nudity game modifications I even said "excuse me" to the girl loving my boyfriend. Hughlander posted:My [27] boyfriend [28] slept with another woman and claims I wanted him to but her meats are well distributed Olive Branch posted:AITA for telling my friend that laziness is what makes her unattractive? learn how to wipe your own rear end, we can't hose you down every time sootikins posted:AITA for telling my BF he should learn how to wipe his rear end Thought my son was having gay sex, he just really liked hummus TLDR: My son is actually gay, but also I really like hummus Mister Olympus posted:TIFU by thinking my son was having gay sex when he was just eating Hummus Cake gay, so what Arsenic Lupin posted:AITA for describing my MIL's birthday cake as "kinda gay" titty_baby_ posted:Cake gay, so what EDIT: Do not message me on here about your dick. Soylent Pudding posted:AITA for "embarrassing" my bf in front of everyone Rest in peace, baffled yelling chicken Pleads posted:Rest in peace, baffled yelling chicken To call me butt hurt is gravely diminishing the actual situation. Foo Diddley posted:AITA for refusing to pay my daughter's tuition after she lied about her major? Apparently my mom's vagina falls under advanced sign language skills Soylent Pudding posted:TIFU learning sign language. This is basic tunnel law DogoDogo posted:My neighbor won't unlock their side of the tunnel, has anyone ever experienced this before? took my oral steroids thinking they would make him buff at the gym Foo Diddley posted:AITAH for locking up my “valuables” in my house? I usually bust to this song and find it devastating she hates it ascii genitals posted:My (20F) girlfriend of two years told me the music that I (25M) play during sex is weird and a major turn off He started crying and throwing his juice all over the place. Crocobile posted:AITA for losing it on my husband for lying about an emergency to get me to leave my brother's wedding early? She took it as a personal attack, which it was DoubleNegative posted:AITA for not going to rehab Oh look, a bird scientist! Did you take bird classes in school?? Captain Hygiene posted:AITA for using pretentious words? dude how old are you what the hell Evil Willow posted:AITA for telling my friend her boyfriend can’t come to my party because of a comment he made to my boyfriend? Skidmarks on a thong Evil Willow posted:AITA for making sure my stepdaughter knows how to do laundry? Obviously this is hilarious AreWeDrunkYet posted:AITA for flicking my boogers get bent surc posted:AITA for calmly defending my thread title from people who wanted to ruin it? It is not my responsibility to deal with consequences of my actions teen witch posted:AITA for smoking in the bathroom during a parent-teacher conference? spychological factord Involuntary Sparkle posted:AITA for leaving my inlaws christmas dinner after I found out that they didn't make accommodations for me? He threw his phone and sulked still mad he can't get a gun olylifter posted:Bf [36M] wants me [23F] to buy him a gun and whatnot Evil Willow posted:AITA for asking my boss if he would be willing to switch my hours around because I am not a morning person? Ketchup Debate & Discussion kimbo305 posted:There's one or two things that they are extremely 'sanctimonious' about : and I always made sure to ask her how FLATULENCE was doing Mx. posted:AITA for purposefully "misnaming" a coworkers child when talking about them I see where she's coming from, however, I am right Evil Willow posted:AITA for standing my ground about the likelihood of an illegitimate child being the man’s (versus the woman’s)? My son, unfortunately, is like me. Hughlander posted:AITA for kicking out my son and his family because they won't leave my dog alone. I dunno, that sounds like some straight people poo poo Hughlander posted:AITA for getting my friend a more expensive birthday gift? It upset his girlfriend who felt I crossed a line UPDATE: speaking with a lawyer Evil Willow posted:AITA; Not doing anything for husband’s birthday all the assholes under the sun FMguru posted:Another generous vacation invitation that turns out to be a stealth babysitting trap - with a killer twist. Edit 3: he is not a cat. Arsenic Lupin posted:AITA for not wanting to be woke up in the middle of the night to make my husband food or rub him? She basically called me an rear end in a top hat, in more than one language Cowslips Warren posted:AITA for asking my girlfriend to only speak English in our home? supposedly the things I do are "red flags" and "toxic" Evil Willow posted:My 24M girlfriend 23F says I am being abusive. I could find a new wife, but I couldn't get an arm back ad090 posted:AITA for refusing to see my wife's brother? he simply let me gently caress up everything DeadMansSuspenders posted:I'm[f36] getting really lonely, but hubby[m34] doesn't want to change our open relationship rules. My code may be flawed, but it's my code. MK-Ultramarathon posted:AITA for refusing to kill a spider in my girlfriend's house? I was seduced and basically mind controlled into a having an affair Cythereal posted:AITA for sending my family an angry email because they still speak to my ex-husband and even have him over, especially in light of his present “relationship” with a girl 20 years younger than him? one of the cars got a little out of control as I was doing a pony Cowslips Warren posted:AITA? My brother said I could borrow his cosplay lightsaber and I took it to a takeover/sideshow and he’s so upset with me after it got a tiny scratch and needs a new tube thing. figure might not be entirely congruent with chronological reality welcome to hell posted:Accidentally stated I had 24 months experience and now I'm being investigated in LegalAdviceUK by "sraregulate" The previous thread title was naan-compliant. Captain Hygiene posted:AITA for not letting my GF eat the naan bread we ordered? Where is the sprezzatura? Must you all look so pained? vonnegutt posted:I love that post, so I found it again: Regardless of what they may feel, I am the primary stakeholder in the relationship FMguru posted:Rare estranged adult child story where you come down solidly on the side of the parents. she has always thought that I look down on her. I do, but Cowslips Warren posted:AITA for telling my stepmother that by her standards I am better than her? when he puts on his socks he looks like a lollipop now artsy fartsy posted:WIBTA for telling my husband he's just fat? I am off to go fingerprint my box of fruit snacks Hughlander posted:AITAH for making a microscope slide of my husbands sperm screaming about how ghosts are probably already haunting the place Cowslips Warren posted:AITA For putting a "vortex" in our restaurant? I'm not a "narcissist" if anything she is. FMguru posted:AITA for “ruining” my daughters graduation? i have never cleaned my home and will not be starting now Cowslips Warren posted:AITA for 'stealing' from my 17 year old stepdaughter? my bf and Ike was having a debate over acceptable use of the n-word Mx. posted:AITB for abandoning my friend of 3 years bc he compared me to another girl? oh John the Baptist oooo yeahh Baptizing with water Fatty posted:Song I am writing This sounds like a way to prevent men from playing video games blackmet posted:My (36F) boyfriend (43M) refuses to do the Fair Play method and I'm at my wits end about chores. How can I get him to participate in housework more fairly? we're going to see my real (not a pillow) father for Christmas Cowslips Warren posted:AITA for keeping my expensive body pillow? too plain, too plebeian, too perverted, too much mayonnaise Captain Hygiene posted:AITA for saying my brother-in-law should bring his own food to the party? I’m not gonna strangle my own fuckin brother god drat it. Vim Fuego posted:How do I get my brother to stop calling himself a sigma alpha male. It was one sex. Just one Buzzman posted:I cheated on my (M30) wife (F28) and now I don't know how to get her back to normal together they form a bullshit Voltron ChickenOfTomorrow posted:Let's check in on Captain Awkward. "it's just piss," he insists. Buzzman posted:how can i (f26) convince my boyfriend (28m) to wash his hands after peeing? Scooby Doo Clue belongs in the Scooby Doo Clue box Mazerunner posted:Im marrying a monster to which he followed up asking WHO is Ukraine. Moon Slayer posted:AITA for breaking up with my fiance just because he is dumb ? I found out because they are both stupid FMguru posted:AITAH for using my husband's affair with my cousin against them? NO THIS IS NOT A CAT POST ChickenOfTomorrow posted:AITA for pushing my sister cup off my dresser? In my best Goofy impression I said Odd posted:I [23f] created a 1:1 scale puppet version of my boyfriend [22m] and showed it to him during foreplay as a joke. Now he hasn’t texted me in 12 hours and I’m starting to get worried. How do I get him to text me back? I have nothing against this baby. Admiral Joeslop posted:Am I the rear end in a top hat for telling my boyfriend ex wife I won’t babysit her child? pentyne fucked around with this message at 20:18 on Mar 26, 2024 |
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Oct 20, 2021 04:00
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I calmly explained this trashy thread was temporary (it's permanent)
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Oct 20, 2021 04:06
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AITA because I decided to stop cooking and cleaning to teach my husband a lesson in appreciation?quote:I do a majority of the housework, and I’m okay with this. I genuinely don’t mind it. My issue was not with wanting more help from him. It was just because I felt like he didn’t appreciate it.
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Oct 20, 2021 04:08
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Seems like it would be less effort to just murder your husband
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Oct 20, 2021 04:09
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Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat.
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Oct 20, 2021 04:12
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kntfkr posted:Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat.
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Oct 20, 2021 04:15
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kntfkr posted:Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat. AITA for Posting Below kntfkr?
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Oct 20, 2021 04:20
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I rushed through to the end of last thread to try to suggest this, but it was too long, too late: Last time we went out it was 2 fish sandwiches, 2 chicken sandwiches, a large Dr. Pepper, and a milk, all eaten with no manners.
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Oct 20, 2021 04:20
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kntfkr posted:Everything below this rear end in a top hat is a post.
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Oct 20, 2021 04:24
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Evil Willow posted:AITA because I decided to stop cooking and cleaning to teach my husband a lesson in appreciation? Should start breaking plates over his head. kntfkr posted:Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat. How dare
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Oct 20, 2021 04:24
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kntfkr posted:Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat. InB4......oh....yeah.
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Oct 20, 2021 04:28
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kimbo305 posted:I rushed through to the end of last thread to try to suggest this, but it was too long, too late: Honestly, the milk was the weirdest part of that. Like what kinda place serves chicken and fish fastfood but also milk?
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Oct 20, 2021 04:29
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kntfkr posted:Everyone above this post is an rear end in a top hat. 
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Oct 20, 2021 04:29
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Ooo I can groundfloor this one! 
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Oct 20, 2021 04:29
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Evil Willow posted:AITA because I decided to stop cooking and cleaning to teach my husband a lesson in appreciation? Wow get a better husband.
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Oct 20, 2021 04:31
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I didn't know Jesus was missing. 
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Oct 20, 2021 04:38
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Starting the thread with a trash tier husband upset his bang maid isn't doing the maid part anymore  Gotta respect the classics.
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Oct 20, 2021 04:40
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You know, that lady with the kid-unfriensly dog could have solved the whole thing with some dog heelies
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Oct 20, 2021 04:40
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kntfkr posted:Everyone below this post is an rear end in a top hat.
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Oct 20, 2021 04:43
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Evil Willow posted:AITA because I decided to stop cooking and cleaning to teach my husband a lesson in appreciation? What do men do
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Oct 20, 2021 04:44
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Brawnfire posted:What do men do Ahem…DICAP!
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Oct 20, 2021 04:46
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Gotta get in on the ground floor!
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Oct 20, 2021 04:46
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Jesus Christ I’m surrounded by assholes.
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Oct 20, 2021 04:51
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Evil Willow posted:AITA because I decided to stop cooking and cleaning to teach my husband a lesson in appreciation? If my wife ever serves me with divorce papers I'll simply counter with a curated selection of r/r posts like this one (and of course some rear end-wiping impaired men) along with a note asking if she really wants to take her chances finding someone who meets basic human requirements, you know, like me. Why is it so difficult for these manchildren?
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Oct 20, 2021 04:56
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Do people chant DICAP in the replies of these Reddit threads or is that bannable?
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Oct 20, 2021 04:58
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This is the thread where we find that the 15-second rule also applies to ethics
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Oct 20, 2021 05:06
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Pete kicks rear end. Fight Man does not kick rear end.
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Oct 20, 2021 05:12
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therobit posted:Jesus Christ I’m surrounded by assholes. We all feel that way.
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Oct 20, 2021 05:17
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This is a terrible way to start off the new thread but I found this one so refreshing for the OP considering their situation before getting into it. Moving into my [26F] boyfriend's [28M] home that belongs to him, how do I make sure I'm protected and safe financially and legally? quote:I'm not sure if this is the correct subreddit to post so correct me if I'm wrong but I do need advice on this topic.
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Oct 20, 2021 05:17
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Sign a lease but stipulate it month to month 
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Oct 20, 2021 05:19
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"the beauty of reddit"???????
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Oct 20, 2021 05:20
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kntfkr posted:Everyone blow this post in the rear end in a top hat.
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Oct 20, 2021 05:21
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Metaline posted:Do people chant DICAP in the replies of these Reddit threads or is that bannable? DICAP is a lovely lie, at least if you have a minimum of standards regarding the quality of dicks. It's incredibly hard to find decent dick.
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Oct 20, 2021 05:27
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BabyFur Denny posted:DICAP is a lovely lie, at least if you have a minimum of standards regarding the quality of dicks. It's incredibly hard to find decent dick. Woah woah woah there, nobody ever said anything about decent.
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Oct 20, 2021 05:31
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BabyFur Denny posted:DICAP is a lovely lie, at least if you have a minimum of standards regarding the quality of dicks. It's incredibly hard to find decent dick. BabyFur Denny, i have some questions about this post, and how it relates to your username.
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Oct 20, 2021 05:33
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This thread is one of those GBS irregularities like the Red Letter Media thread, where it always seems to be top but only the insular few know what to post inside 
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Oct 20, 2021 05:38
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