aphid_licker posted:

- Spending 19h a day seated at ones basement posting rig

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Other ways goons have endangered themselves:

DA JOOSE
Trying to obtain genuine Russian krokodil
Building homemade bombs to explode cows
Traveling to the Middle East as a war tourist and ending up in a Syrian torture prison
Buying a manual sports car after losing an arm in a motorcycle crash
Heatstroke from bitcoin mining

wa27 posted:

That dude that lost his fingat thermiting a PS2.

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Other ways goons have endangered themselves:

DA JOOSE
Trying to obtain genuine Russian krokodil
Building homemade bombs to explode cows
Traveling to the Middle East as a war tourist and ending up in a Syrian torture prison
Buying a manual sports car after losing an arm in a motorcycle crash
Heatstroke from bitcoin mining

fartknocker posted:

Don't forget Benghazi!

fartknocker posted:

Don't forget Benghazi!

EorayMel posted:

Can't stop thinking about/laughing at this thread

Dignity Van Houten posted:

update from hospital. Burning charcoal indoor releases enough carbon dioxide to kill you. Paramedics said my downstairs neighbor saved my life when she came up to check on me. after smelling smoke and hearing me collapse. No word if kfc log worked or not.

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

- Accidentally invading Syria (not Caro, and technically not the goon's fault)

Vasudus posted:

I once scraped the side of a very angry CWO4's humvee with mine because I was getting mail for the unit by myself, and I misjudged how much space I had to make a sharp turn in the parking area.

The CWO4 was in the vehicle at the time. He was not pleased.

---------

Being an Engineer on the Iraq/Syria border means a lot of border construction. We had a huge, huge AO and we were responsible for building a 15 foot berm between Iraq/Syria to prevent smugglers, allegedly. Since being inside dozers and ACEs in 120 degree heat is an excuse to have heat casualties, most of the work we would do was at dusk into the night.

So we're out building a berm at a new site at like 0200 and something isn't right. The paper maps had us right were we were supposed to be. The FBCB2 had us about a mile on the wrong side of the border. My XO, believing himself to be the second coming of Patton himself, said that we were fine and to continue on mission. This was his project, after all.

About 0230 rolls around and my gunner says

'uh...SGT Vasudus, a BMP is the wheeled ruskie APC right?'
'...no, why?'
'so what's wheeled with a 50 on it?'
'...that's a BRDM...are you studying for the board or something?'
'see those lights way out to the west? like 50 of those BRDM things are coming right for us'

Welp.

I immediately hop up there and look down the nightvision scope to see what the christ he was talking about. Sure as poo poo, there was a huge fuckoff wheeled and light track force heading for us at high speed. At least two whole company+ sized elements.

I tell my XO that we're on the wrong side of the border and the Syrians aren't very happy about it. He says they're wrong and we'll be fine, and he's gonna call in some air support to scare them off. He relays his coordinates and my TOC informs him that the FBCB2 is correct.

XO comes screaming over the radio 'PACK YOUR poo poo! PACK YOUR poo poo! WE'RE ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE BORDER'

So we quickly left this half finished berm project and immediately left the area back to Iraq.

EorayMel posted:

Is that from this?

Meme Poker Party posted:

Sending a hearty "get well and lol" from the 1000 Page Thread.

Marshal Prolapse posted:

There was also that one goon who killed himself to avoid paying child support. Well that was a theory at least.

SLICK GOKU BABY posted:

There's no way this is real. Who the gently caress lights a charcoal grill inside their apartment? How the gently caress are you even still alive at this point to do that in the first place?

SLICK GOKU BABY posted:

There's no way this is real. Who the gently caress lights a charcoal grill inside their apartment? How the gently caress are you even still alive at this point to do that in the first place?

Sid Vicious posted:

Bags Fly at Noon posted:

You know how lots of online recipes try to imitate the colonel’s secret blend?

They all miss the secret 11th spice: toasted human.

I. M. Gei posted:

I came here from GBS

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Other ways goons have endangered themselves:

DA JOOSE
Trying to obtain genuine Russian krokodil
Building homemade bombs to explode cows
Traveling to the Middle East as a war tourist and ending up in a Syrian torture prison
Buying a manual sports car after losing an arm in a motorcycle crash
Heatstroke from bitcoin mining

I. M. Gei posted:

I came here from GBS

old beast lunatic posted:

Thanks bro I didn't want to be the first gibbis to post in the wild west world of coupons

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Other ways goons have endangered themselves:

DA JOOSE
Trying to obtain genuine Russian krokodil
Building homemade bombs to explode cows
Traveling to the Middle East as a war tourist and ending up in a Syrian torture prison
Buying a manual sports car after losing an arm in a motorcycle crash
Heatstroke from bitcoin mining

super sweet best pal posted:

Endorph posted:

remembering the e/n thread about a lesbian cutting her girlfriend's hymen with a pair of scissors and the first reply being 'this is the one relationship thread where severing was a bad idea'

Endorph posted:

remembering the e/n thread about a lesbian cutting her girlfriend's hymen with a pair of scissors and the first reply being 'this is the one relationship thread where severing was a bad idea'