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cult_hero
Jul 10, 2001
Try the bitter ones, much softer.

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cult_hero
Jul 10, 2001

Oh Don Piano posted:

They already have low taste, not willing to sacrifice it for ease of chew


Considering they form the basis for so many things, like nougat, marzipan, bear claws, etc, your perception is incorrect. It sounds like a COVID test might be in order.

quote:


Almonds are not hard, strengthen your jaw muscles


Also this. I found rocks to be useful for an early training regimen before moving up to ball bearings and other teeth.

cult_hero
Jul 10, 2001

gleebster posted:

Wait til OP finds out about Brazil nuts.

You're taking them out of the shell first right?

Right?!

cult_hero
Jul 10, 2001

gleebster posted:

I ain't shelling your Brazil nuts. You want them, you gotta work for that.

But every year your mom gives me a new nutcracker. I keep telling her that they're too small for my weiner, but she just keeps throwing nuts at me saying "You're a shell of the man I knew."

Sad thing is, your dad knows and he seems to be taking it real hard. All his nuts going unshelled.... Gotta feel for the guy.

cult_hero
Jul 10, 2001
Oh, but have you tried Marconi almonds? They're flatter and don't have the brown bran layer.

Also, you can get almond extract, which has all the flavor our almonds and none of the chewing!

cult_hero
Jul 10, 2001

gleebster posted:

I highly doubt this. My old man has been dead for over 30 years and my mother would make you crack your own nuts, even if you were sleeping with her.

Sorry, I meant your real dad.... And obviously I crack my own nuts, that's what the nutcracker is for. Last year it was a creepy Joe Biden bear wearing lingerie. Your mom's a real character that one.

And we're not sleeping together, it's a much more complicated arrangement. You would know that if you visited once in a while.

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cult_hero
Jul 10, 2001

Aardvark! posted:

I want even less chewing than that

Boofing maybe?

Also, eating raw almonds may allow you to live longer.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/nati...fd98_story.html

Public disclaimer: These are paid statements from the California Almond Growers Association.

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