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I'm thinking about starting a new gang where we all just dress like cops. Batman doesn't punch the crooked ones out right? And that's like all of them! So we should be pretty set. Maybe we could even reach out to all the guys on the take about it
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Jan 25, 2022 18:33
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Prof. Crocodile posted:Youse guys hurry up and load those barrels of clown gas. This place gives me the creeps. “Why duz jokah always do gigs in creepy abandoned places like disused hospitals and empty cathedrals? And who put all dese gargoyle in the rafters? Ahh whatevuh ahm gonna go stand in front of this loose vent.” “Eyy rocko you go stand by that crumblin brick wall,yeah the same kind that batman exploded when he took three of us out.”
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Jan 25, 2022 18:40
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Instead of fighting him in the street when he's all geared up why don't we attack him while he's asleep or just blow up his whole mansion? I'm talking about Bruce Wayne. The big house on... Well he's batman right? You didn't know? None of you did?! Jesus loving Christ.
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Jan 25, 2022 18:41
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Outrail posted:Instead of fighting him in the street when he's all geared up why don't we attack him while he's asleep or just blow up his whole mansion? I thought he was Robin
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Jan 25, 2022 18:41
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Bruce wayne?! The handsome well built quadrillionaire who’s super mysterious and has a great chin…..and…that adopted kid….and…he can drive real well in those charity races….. Nahhhh you’se an idiot T-bone! What a schmuck!
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Jan 25, 2022 18:47
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I had this great idea to escape henching forever. I waited until after Joker went back to Arkham after the last heist, then took some of the left over plutonium and some clown gas, then fed both to a parakeet and poked him with a stick until he bit me. Doc says I've got 3 months left to live.
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Jan 25, 2022 18:56
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Outrail posted:Instead of fighting him in the street when he's all geared up why don't we attack him while he's asleep or just blow up his whole mansion? I used to think that too, but one time I seen Batman at one of Bruce Wayne's parties and they shook hands. So no, it can't be the same guy. Lemme guess, you're one of those nuts what think Superman is secretly walking among us. Why would he? He's Superman!
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Jan 25, 2022 18:58
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A Fancy Hat posted:I used to think that too, but one time I seen Batman at one of Bruce Wayne's parties and they shook hands. So no, it can't be the same guy. Ey, it coulda been an actor there, playin' tha PART of Bruce Wayne while da REAL Bruce Wayne was in da Bat Suit!
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Jan 25, 2022 19:05
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Big Beef City posted:Ey, it coulda been an actor there, playin' tha PART of Bruce Wayne while da REAL Bruce Wayne was in da Bat Suit! Maybe, but Bruce was hanging around with his adopted son and stuff. You really think, if he was Batman, that kid wouldn't be Robin? And, let's face it, nobody would let their kid be Robin, way too freakin' dangerous. The whole thing falls apart cuz o' that.
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Jan 25, 2022 19:10
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Big Beef City posted:Ey, it coulda been an actor there, playin' tha PART of Bruce Wayne while da REAL Bruce Wayne was in da Bat Suit! the actor was in the bruce suit
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Jan 25, 2022 19:29
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What if they got an actor to play Bruce, then had Bruce get in the Batman suit, then had Batman pretend to be like a waiter or somethin'? That seems like a good way to cover your tracks to me.
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Jan 25, 2022 19:32
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I always figured Superman was some ugly grey alien wearing a rubber suit.
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Jan 25, 2022 19:35
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I'm interning with Dr. Crane, the guy's a walking textbook. Also, really sort of creepy. *becomes the next victim of the fear toxin*
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Jan 25, 2022 19:38
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RBA Starblade posted:I'm thinking about starting a new gang where we all just dress like cops. Batman doesn't punch the crooked ones out right? And that's like all of them! So we should be pretty set. Maybe we could even reach out to all the guys on the take about it UPDATE: I quit the cops the stuff they get up to ain't right. Say what you like about the Joker but I never seen him make clown gas that only clowns black people. Splicer fucked around with this message at 19:46 on Jan 25, 2022 |
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Jan 25, 2022 19:44
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exposure to joker gas produces an immunity to covid. mr. j's working out a deal where he jokerfies the entire country. do you have any idea how much joker gas that's going to take? we're gonna be rich boys
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Jan 25, 2022 20:23
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A Fancy Hat posted:What if they got an actor to play Bruce, then had Bruce get in the Batman suit, then had Batman pretend to be like a waiter or somethin'? That seems like a good way to cover your tracks to me. Geez dem rich guys gets whateva dey want. I don't eva gets ta dress up in no batman suit at no fancy party! Tink of the girls yous could meet! 'Hey lady, you wanna get a beer wit old Batman ova here?' Whatta they gonna say? No? HA HA HA Ahhh fuggedabout it.
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Jan 25, 2022 20:24
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Move the clown gas to the abandoned steel mill. Move the clown gas to the abandoned amusement park. Move the clown gas to the abandoned chemical factory. Now they say move the clown gas BACK to the steel mill? I swear to god, I spend my whole life shifting clown gas.
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Jan 25, 2022 20:27
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A guy told me he'd heard he dresses like a bat to scare crooks. Something about us being cowardly and superstitious. Buddy I'm not scared of you 'cos your knives are shaped like bats I'm scared of you because you threw one of them into my liver.
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Jan 25, 2022 20:34
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Splicer posted:A guy told me he'd heard he dresses like a bat to scare crooks. Something about us being cowardly and superstitious. Buddy I'm not scared of you 'cos your knives are shaped like bats I'm scared of you because you threw one of them into my liver. Send the medical bills to Wayne Enterprises. He's a stupid freak in some ways but at least Wayne, sorry 'Batman', will fix you up. Apparently part of his 'criminal rehabilitation' initiative.
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Jan 25, 2022 20:52
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I spilled that huge 55 gallon barrel of cum the joker wanted in my eyes and now he's pissed
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Jan 25, 2022 20:54
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"Batman doesn't kill." Yeah, sure. He don't kill nobody. And yeah, we all joke about how he just breaks your arm, or snaps your spine over the back of a railing as he throws ya off a four story walk-up, or whatever. My shoulder still hurts every time it rains. But you remember my pal, Vinnie? Vinnie was a good kid, never that smart, but had a nice heart. No money, baby on the way, all that jazz. So I bring him along with me last time I moved some clown gas. Figured we could split my take, give him a little bit. The Bat shows up, hits me with some kind of knock-out bat-shaped piece of metal. That thing just dug right into my side, hurt like hell, I go down. Vinnie hops out of the truck, starts running. Like I said, he ain't so smart. But he's smart enough to try to get out of there when the Bat's around. Bat don't like that. Vinnie is almost out of the alley when all of the sudden lightning flashes. He turns and looks over his shoulder, nothing. He looks forward, and standing right in front of him, close as you are to me, it's the Bat. Doesn't say nothing. Just starts to beat ole Vinnie within an inch of his life. Smacks him up good. Vinnie dies a year later. Healthy as a horse before that. Then, no warning? Just doesn't wake up one day. His momma won't stop crying. Vinnie wasn't never the same after that beating. You know he never had no doctor or nothing, but the body just wasn't meant to take that kind of punishment. But no. Course the Bat never kills nobody. Because that would be wrong.
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Jan 25, 2022 21:03
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Dah bats swunged his cape at me, you know dat sonuvabitch puts lil bat-shaped razuhs on da ends of it? Sick bastard I tells ya.
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Jan 25, 2022 21:08
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Been doing gigs for Killer Croc for a long time, sure he's a loner most of the time, but sometimes even he needs a goon or two to do stuff like get him sewer plans, find abandoned warehouses with easy access to the sewer or hold him a map and do other things he can't do when he's having one of his weirder periods. You know, like sometimes he's like just a big dude with a bad skin condition, sometimes he's grey, sometimes he's green, sometimes he's like a mob boss, sometimes he gloats about hitting batman with a big rock, but sometimes he's also a big 'orrible crocodile monster with giant claws, teeth and so on. He never ever talks about it, but sometimes after getting out on bail and I get back to him, he just looks completely different than he used to! You should also never ask him about it - poor ol' Bob learnt that lesson when boss was particularly 'orrible and big, you know, some time before Maxie Zeus got religion in Arkham. Weirdest thing was, that when he got out eventually, like they all do, he was just a big dude with bad skin again! Then a week later, his head's a crocodile head! Still a great guy, even if he did bite off Bob's head. Anyway his dental sucks so I'm thinking of checking out Joker's crew, he seems to love toothy grins so I bet he has good dental.
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Jan 25, 2022 21:20
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Can't believe I'm stuck working for King Tut. This is the worst gimmick ever. Dressing up like an Egyptian? This isn't the Sahara, pal. It's 40 degrees out and he has us wearing a loin cloth and sandals. I look ridiculous. Even working for Bookworm would be better than this. I never thought being a criminal could be so uncool.
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Jan 25, 2022 21:45
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So's I was in the can doin' a looong stretch and I got out. Think anyone will hire an ex-con? No way. What do I do then? I may be old but I'm still good wid my fists and I know how to keep my trap shut, and the Riddler always likes dumb talent he can show off his shiny brain to. I notice some odd stuff, like the crew is all hard edges and swears a lot, but I don't say nothin' cuz I'm not payin' the bills. And the Riddler? He don't seem so jolly any more, more like he's bitter and harsh. But I figure something just had gone bad, maybe one of the long time crew got pinched. Speaking of which, I ask the Riddler where to pick up my uniform. He just gives me a weird look and turns away. So's I guess a leather jacket and dungarees is in. Sure enough, third day on his crew, waiting for the Riddler to get back from a meeting with the Penguin or somebody, Batman shows up. But he doesn't barge through the door and give a speech, he swings on some sort of rope through a window and does this acrobatic landing on a table, and then all dramatically he asks, "How many of you do I have to put in the hospital before I find out where Nygma is?" It's honestly pretty scary. I've never seen him like this. Plus I guess while I was away, Bats was doing sit-ups because that gut he had was gone, and it looks like he traded the powder blue spandex for black body armor. I grab hands with the guy next to me and he asks, "What the gently caress are you doing?" Great, we're going to get a lecture on inappropriate language from Batman now. I tell the moron "swing me around so I can catapult into Batman." He shakes me loose and I swear to gosh pulls out a gun. Next thing I know, he's got little bat-knives stuck in his arm and he's dropped the piece. It's crazy. I was always able to plant a couple of good pops on Batman in the good old days, so I step up, ready to shout "pow!", start to give him a right cross, and he does some sort of, I don't know, Chinese Kung Fu move and blocks my punch. Long story short, the prison doc says I have a dislocated shoulder and a compound fracture of the "humerus". When I get out, no way I'm going back to the Riddler. The Joker was always good for a laugh. Never understood why he grew a mustache under all that face paint though.
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Jan 25, 2022 21:47
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Hey so matchsticks says he could set me up working with 'deflater mouse'. Havent heard of the guy before, does anyone know what i'd me doing? I imagine a lot of ballon and tire based crimes???
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Jan 25, 2022 21:48
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there's a new crew in town I think I'm gonna hook up with. a little guy, a spaniard and a giant
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Jan 25, 2022 21:55
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You ever wonder what they do with all those empty cans of clown gas?
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Jan 25, 2022 22:02
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poisonpill posted:You ever wonder what they do with all those empty cans of clown gas? Refill them at the clown gas factory obviously. My bother says there's serious coin in recycling clown gas canisters for Mr. J.
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Jan 25, 2022 23:09
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Outrail posted:Instead of fighting him in the street when he's all geared up why don't we attack him while he's asleep or just blow up his whole mansion? Do youse know what happened to the last guy who said someting like that? Neither does anybody else. Wayne is untouchable unless you're da Joker and noticing a connection between Wayne and the Bat is the surest way anyone knows to commit suicide.
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Jan 26, 2022 01:09
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The Voice of Labor posted:exposure to joker gas produces an immunity to covid. mr. j's working out a deal where he jokerfies the entire country. do you have any idea how much joker gas that's going to take? we're gonna be rich boys this is your first day, huh? youse going to want to check your employees handbook wit' regards to profit sharing. yeah, the moderately powerful acid that sprayed out when you flipped to that page should let you know where you stand.
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Jan 26, 2022 01:19
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i hope the joker or whoever kills batman. probably bane. finish the job.
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Jan 26, 2022 01:21
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Yeah, every so often the Bat shows up and ruins da heist, but it’s not so bad. He just drops you in front of a police station, so long as you keep ya mouth shut, and can sweat out a few days in the slammer, they can’t put you away for nothing. And he don’t beat you so bad as some of them Gotham boys.
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Jan 26, 2022 01:23
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Admiralty Flag posted:So's I was in the can doin' a looong stretch and I got out. Think anyone will hire an ex-con? No way. What do I do then? I may be old but I'm still good wid my fists and I know how to keep my trap shut, and the Riddler always likes dumb talent he can show off his shiny brain to. respect for one of the originals, tonight the prison hooch is on us
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Jan 26, 2022 01:24
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I got put in a headlock by Wonder Woman once. I swear it's the truth! She was in Gotham looking for Batman!...she smells like jasmine.
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Jan 26, 2022 02:21
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catwoman naked . . . . . . . . catwoman posion ivy lesbean . . . . . . . . . catwoman posion ivy lesbean real . . catwoman batman sextape . . . batman sex tape . . . . . . batmam penis size . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . normal penis size . penis surgery biger . . penis surgery biger real . delete searxh history
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Jan 26, 2022 02:21
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Seriously, gently caress this job. I'm branching out and becoming a supervillain on my own. Here's a concept I'm working on. I'd be called The Slinky, and I'd have a spring on my head. And I'd go down stairs really fast end over end. This is going to be awesome.
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Jan 26, 2022 02:33
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Okay if we just rob 16 banks by tomorrow, we can make payroll
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Jan 26, 2022 02:36
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Eclipse12 posted:catwoman naked Copy paste Schedule appointment double bat
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Jan 26, 2022 02:48
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Guys I need help. gently caress. gently caress gently caress gently caress! I killed Robin. Fucker fell right in front of me on the street and went under the truck. Didn't have a chance to react. Musta been swinging around and lost his grip or something. If Joker finds out he's gonna kill me. The Bat will kill me. Cops can't protect me. Anyway, I panicked and beat the poo poo out of the body with a crowbar and tossed it into the sewers. Hopefully, the Bat thinks Joker did it.
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Jan 26, 2022 03:08
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