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ellasmith
Sep 29, 2021


just hit the diarrhea bong at my friends brothers place sounds nasty but it was actually lit. We were smoking through a bong with this muddy brown water that looked like shit and I assumed it was just regular water and the bong hadn't been cleaned in a while. Turns out the dude puts his diarrhea in the fridge for months and filters it

If I were sent to a normal state prison I would be hyperventilating and crying in anticipation of being locked up in gen pop with a bunch of dangerous criminals and fearing for my life. If I found out I was sentenced to life at ADX Florence I would be depressed but calm.

23 hours a day by yourself with tv and I presume books, 1 hour a day to exercise. 0 concern for your safety or really anything youíre not expecting. Might be boring but it would be little different from my current life - no gooning it up on the SA forums, but I wouldnít have to go to work either.

My biggest fears would be the food might taste bad or the bed would be uncomfortable.

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Pillow Armadillo
Nov 14, 2005

"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!"


OP is this you?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D04wb7P_v-4

ellasmith
Sep 29, 2021


just hit the diarrhea bong at my friends brothers place sounds nasty but it was actually lit. We were smoking through a bong with this muddy brown water that looked like shit and I assumed it was just regular water and the bong hadn't been cleaned in a while. Turns out the dude puts his diarrhea in the fridge for months and filters it


No.

Cubone
May 26, 2011

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

you might have some misconceptions about what prolonged isolation actually does to a person
the U.N. classifies solitary confinement in excess of 15 days as a form of torture

Bad Purchase
Jun 17, 2019





i still think it would be pretty bad, op

STABASS
Apr 18, 2009



Fun Shoe

it's not a normal tv, there's just one channel with DOJ approved content. they probably don't have The Shield or anything

signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008

i was told my old av was distracting


Sounds like the thoughts of someone who hasn't experienced much imprisonment

Read up on the Angola Three some time I guess

nut
Jul 30, 2019



Ya I guess it is op

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

My "Not Vincent Price" shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt.




Smellrose

Hey, it's three meals and a bed. And you're probably safer in stir there than most other places, ironically enough.

nut
Jul 30, 2019



Instead of being in prison I think Iíd like to live in one of the small islands out of assassins creed black flag a little sand a lot of water and there are often hidden treasures on them so you have something to do the more I think about it the more I wish assassins creed black flag was real

Senor Tron
May 25, 2006




STABASS posted:

it's not a normal tv, there's just one channel with DOJ approved content. they probably don't have The Shield or anything

Yeah, it's a single feed that shows "recreational, educational, and religious programming".

This is what the cells look like:





If I found out I was going to be spending the rest of my life in that cell I'd be doing my best to end it beforehand.

Kirk Vikernes
Apr 26, 2004

Count Goatnackh



ellasmith posted:

If I were sent to a normal state prison I would be hyperventilating and crying in anticipation of being locked up in gen pop with a bunch of dangerous criminals and fearing for my life. If I found out I was sentenced to life at ADX Florence I would be depressed but calm.

23 hours a day by yourself with tv and I presume books, 1 hour a day to exercise. 0 concern for your safety or really anything you’re not expecting. Might be boring but it would be little different from my current life - no gooning it up on the SA forums, but I wouldn’t have to go to work either.

My biggest fears would be the food might taste bad or the bed would be uncomfortable.

That sounds rad compared to the night I spent in jail.

signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008

i was told my old av was distracting


Kirk Vikernes posted:

That sounds rad compared to the night I spent in jail.

I can assure you that years of disempowerment and abuse feels very different

Cream-of-Plenty
Apr 21, 2010


STABASS posted:

it's not a normal tv, there's just one channel with DOJ approved content. they probably don't have The Shield or anything

The schedule is
4 hours of The 700 Club and related religious programming
Several hours of public access programming
Several hours of weather channel programming
2 hours for an edited-for-content movie drawn from a small pool of donated films (including Gigli, Left Behind, and Superbabies)
6 hours of Big Bang Theory

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006



Cream-of-Plenty posted:

The schedule is
4 hours of The 700 Club and related religious programming
Several hours of public access programming
Several hours of weather channel programming
2 hours for an edited-for-content movie drawn from a small pool of donated films (including Gigli, Left Behind, and Superbabies)
6 hours of Big Bang Theory

Are we sure this is a prison and not paradise?

interwhat
Jul 23, 2005

it's kickin in dude

i say go for it op

Agent Escalus
Oct 5, 2002

"I couldn't stop saying aloud how miscast Jim Carrey was!"


Why donít you just find a walk-in closet and lock yourself inside in your free time?

nut
Jul 30, 2019



Iíve been thinking about it more and maybe prison rules we should all go

Nooner
Mar 26, 2007

An A+ Poster (:

dont have the crime dont do the time thats what I always say :clint:

Nooner
Mar 26, 2007

An A+ Poster (:

nut posted:

Iíve been thinking about it more and maybe prison rules we should all go

If there is anythign that ive learned about prison from movies it is that if I go I will learn to be cool instead of a huge dork and then I will get to bang zooey deschanel at the end

so yeah, prison sounds pretty fuggin cool

phasmid
Jan 16, 2015

Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY


Nooner posted:

dont have the crime dont do the time thats what I always say :clint:

Your time is my crime.

nut
Jul 30, 2019



Nooner posted:

If there is anythign that ive learned about prison from movies it is that if I go I will learn to be cool instead of a huge dork and then I will get to bang zooey deschanel at the end

so yeah, prison sounds pretty fuggin cool

Hell ya brother, you know who they should put in a real jail itís Tom Brady guilty of kissing his son

a few DRUNK BONERS
Mar 25, 2016



They don't let you touch your wing wang in jail so you have to masturbate with your mind

Cubone
May 26, 2011

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

I think the only thing that would make me like prison and think it was awesome is if I could leave

ChunTheUnavoidable
Sep 27, 2021



you make some good points op im going to try to go to prison and get in solitary confinement

Seth Pecksniff
May 27, 2004
remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr remove tfr


Idk I was reading up on ADX Florence and at least you're not likely to get shivved

Plus not being around a lot of people sounds like heaven right now

neato burrito
Aug 25, 2002

bitch better have my chex mix

Caillou is the only show that prisoners are allowed to watch FYI.

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010


There should be some kind of prison tourism program where people agree to be incarcerated for a month or two and treated just the same as the actual prisoners because so many people are interested in this

William Henry Hairytaint
Oct 29, 2011





I don't like people or tv (I don't even own one :smug:) so I think I'd be fine in ADX Florence but I would like to have my wife with me and also my cat

ellasmith
Sep 29, 2021


just hit the diarrhea bong at my friends brothers place sounds nasty but it was actually lit. We were smoking through a bong with this muddy brown water that looked like shit and I assumed it was just regular water and the bong hadn't been cleaned in a while. Turns out the dude puts his diarrhea in the fridge for months and filters it

you guys are going to be freaked out but I spend the vast, vast majority of my waking hours at home alone or trapped at work. Even most of my social events are spent with people I actively hate and canít wait to get away from. And yet Iím fine.

Cubone
May 26, 2011

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

ellasmith posted:

you guys are going to be freaked out but I spend the vast, vast majority of my waking hours at home alone or trapped at work. Even most of my social events are spent with people I actively hate and canít wait to get away from. And yet Iím fine.
nobody is going to be freaked out by this

it still just sounds like you just don't have an accurate conception of what being in prison is like

Craig K
Nov 10, 2016



ellasmith posted:

you guys are going to be freaked out but I spend the vast, vast majority of my waking hours at home alone or trapped at work. Even most of my social events are spent with people I actively hate and canít wait to get away from. And yet Iím fine.

phasmid
Jan 16, 2015

Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY


Devils Affricate posted:

There should be some kind of prison tourism program where people agree to be incarcerated for a month or two and treated just the same as the actual prisoners because so many people are interested in this

Pretty sure I saw a short doc on something like that. A prison resort. I think it was in Japan. Maybe?

Lucky Guy
Jan 24, 2013

TY for no bm



just remember the most important rule: the first day in prison, find the biggest, baddest motherfucker and jerk him off

ChunTheUnavoidable
Sep 27, 2021



My friendís doctor dad went to prison for doctor crimes and he said it was okay and people were nice to him because heís a doctor (heís not a doctor anymore because of his crimes though)

William Henry Hairytaint
Oct 29, 2011





I lied guys I do own a TV.

I'm sorry

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

My "Not Vincent Price" shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt.




Smellrose

neato burrito posted:

Caillou is the only show that prisoners are allowed to watch FYI.

Even the Trump justices would consider this cruel and unusual punishment.

I. M. Gei
Jun 26, 2005


is Caillou that one Cartoon Netwrok show where all the characters have weirdass faces and tiny little itty bitty eyeballs?

blight rhino
Feb 11, 2014

EXQUISITE LURKER RHINO




Devils Affricate posted:

There should be some kind of prison tourism program where people agree to be incarcerated for a month or two and treated just the same as the actual prisoners because so many people are interested in this

not sure if this is ironic, but 60 days in exists. it's reality tv, so i'm sure it's somewhat scripted. but it's good for a laff

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nut
Jul 30, 2019



I. M. Gei posted:

is Caillou that one Cartoon Netwrok show where all the characters have weirdass faces and tiny little itty bitty eyeballs?

This is anti-anime

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