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DJExile
Jun 27, 2007




Predict things and then brag about how wrong you were!

CAG over DLS in 5
Flames look loaded as hell and congrats to the stars who might actually stay one extra game in the playoffs compared to the almost guaranteed sweep they were facing against the avs.

EMN over LAG in 6
Honestly could be a super fun series. There's no pressure on LA and Playoff Edmonton has high chaos potential.

CLD over NVL in 4
Thanks for coming, Nashville.

MNS over SAL in 7
Feel like every one of these games is gonna be tight.

FLI over WAN in 5
Thanks for coming, Washington.

TMB over TNO in 6
lol leafs

CLA over BTO in 6
Boston's still built for the playoffs but god Carolina just look so good.

PBG over NOK in 7
There'll be a bunch of highlight reel poo poo in this series and Shesterkin is going to do his absolute damndest to keep the Rags in it.

e2: Uhhhh 250 goals and cup final is Florida in 6

E: before someone asks, I'm not keeping track of red Xs but if someone else wants to, go nuts.

DJExile fucked around with this message at 21:05 on Apr 30, 2022

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fawning deference
Jul 4, 2018



Colorado over Nashville in 7
-- Funny to see the first "Avs will sweep their way through" already. Playoffs are different, Saros is capable of stealing some wins, and I think the Predators play a good series and push the Avs to seven.

Calgary over Dallas in 5
-- Now this is where I see some dominance and I think the Flames are still actually underrated coming into the playoffs. Absolutely loaded top to bottom and they actually have a goaltender they can win with now. That first line is going to run wild. I think Dallas steals a game, maybe through overtime.

Edmonton over Los Angeles in 5
-- I think this will be a more fun series than many think but I can't see the Kings being able to stop McDavid and Draisaitl through a series and the Oilers are legitimately playing well under Woodcroft. Kings will win Game 1 and the Oilers will win the next four after the scare.

St. Louis over Minnesota in 6
-- I have no idea who wins this, this is pure conjecture. Both evenly-matched excellent teams, but I give the edge to St. Louis and think we will see plenty of overtime in this series.

Florida over Washington in 5
-- Washington looks like they have nothing left and benefitted from a weak bottom half of the conference. They have no goaltending, weak depth, and their core is getting older. Florida is a juggernaut. Sorry Ovie.

Tampa Bay over Toronto in 7
-- This could also go either way. Tampa has won twice and is going for three and the Leafs are trying to get over that hump. I just don't see the goaltending holding up and that should be the difference. Tampa is heating up at the right time and they're as good as anybody when they're on.

Rangers over Pittsburgh in 6
-- This will be a good series but the Rangers are deep and have the best goalie in the world. The Pens will steal a couple of wins despite their goaltending and Crosby will work his magic, but it won't be enough.

Carolina over Boston in 7
-- Another either way series. Two great teams built for the playoffs and two of the very best coaches in the game.. If Carolina gets goaltending that's decent, they'll take it.

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010


Colorado in 4, Saros is out and the Avs are a juggernaut


Calgary in 5. Dallas can't compete with Calgary's depth. Sutter is a miserable prick but is likely a superior coach also.

Edmonton in 6. LA is better defensively but have very little offense. This is definitely the pick where I'm most likely to be wrong, though.

Minnesota in 6. Who can stop Kirill Kapriziov's cock loving?

Florida in 6. Washington has had some issues this year, however, there are 2 X factors: Which Bobrovsky shows up, and Ovi's performance. I'd probably say Florida in 4 if Ekblad were healthy.

Tampa in 6. Tampa's looked shaky lately but Toronto's goaltending is basically the spice rack from the Kids in the Hall bit about Jesus' career as a carpenter.

Rangers in 5. Vastly superior goaltending, Pittsburgh D is garbage, and they just plain lack depth.

Carolina in 6. Boston just doesn't impress me much and Carolina has been consistently very good.

mentholmoose
Nov 4, 2009

YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET


Alright I'll make some picks.

CAL over DAL in 5
Stars have like no depth and aren't good at 5-on-5. The top line might steal a game but the Stars are just outclassed by the Flames.

COL over NSH in 4
If the rumors about Saros being out are true, Nashville is screwed. I still think the Avalanche are the best team in the NHL despite the Panthers winning the Presidents Trophy.

EDM over LAK in 7
McDavid and Draisaitl can steal a series, but the rest of the roster will do their best to piss it away, and LA is underrated. This could go either way I think.

MIN over STL in 6
This might be the most entertaining first round series of all. Two high powered teams with iffy defense and goaltending. Should be fun no matter what, but IMO Kaprizov steals it.

FLA over WSH in 4
The Panthers have the best offense in the NHL and Washington has the worst goaltending in the playoffs.

TB over TOR in 7
Another potentially incredible series; Tampa Bay is the better all-around team but the Leafs forwards can turn the tide of any game easily.

PIT over NYR in 6
Shesterkin could steal the series for the Rangers, but their other biggest advantage, special teams, will be neutralized a lot in the playoffs, and the Rangers don't have nearly the scoring depth Pittsburgh does.

CAR over BOS in 6
I am not going to watch a single second of this awful, hateful series. gently caress both of these teams, I hope the stadiums get hit by a meteor.

Eric the Mauve
May 8, 2012

Making you happy for a buck since 199X


I guess it's left to me to go wildly off the board then!

Avs in 6
Blues in 7
Stars in 5
Kings in 5

Caps in 7
Lightning in 6
Bruins in 6
Rangers in 5

Goals scored: 230
Cup final: Lightning in 4

Eric the Mauve fucked around with this message at 19:16 on Apr 30, 2022

CBJSprague24
Dec 5, 2010

another game at nationwide arena. everybody keeps asking me if they can fuck the cannon. buddy, they don't even let me fuck it



DJExile posted:

CAG over DLS in 5

Hey, you reminded me I can implement the gimmick I was going to last year!

Western Conference
YYC over DFW in 5
I'm sure Calgary has its nice parts when it's not -100. I've been to Dallas and it's definitely A City.

Calgary's a buzzsaw, but not on the level of Colorado. Please pick up your participation trophy on the left, Stars.

DEN bounces BNA in 4
I've been told there are parts of Denver that smell like a skunk. Wonder why. Meanwhile, what the gently caress is there to do in Nashville that doesn't involve a) Country music and b) bachelorette parties? Seriously, I don't get the hype.

Matt Duchene falls to his former team, which is a buzzsaw and Nashville is not. I was hoping the Preds would draw Calgary so we'd get two teams beating the poo poo out of each other in the style of OL' TIME HOCKEY! Please hang your comically bad celebratory banner in the dumpster where you belong, Preds.

YEG over LAX in 6
See my previous commentary about Calgary for my take on Edmonton. I was once in San Diego and wanted to go up to LA to explore for the day; the girl at the front desk said it was a bad idea.

Oilers will win this but Oilers gonna Oil at least twice.

MSP over STL in 6
I didn't realize the Mall of America was a couple light rail stops from the airport. St. Louis has a big, bendy building.

I'll get to watch Game 1 of this series on a real life airplane! As long as Delta's satellite TV channels are all working. Minny's going to Kaprizov and goon their way past the Blues.

Bestern Conference
FLL over DCA in 6
I took a cruise out of Ft. Lauderdale once. It was a place. You know one thing I've noticed about Washington, DC? loving everybody runs there. Earbuds, headbands, and jogging gear.

The biggest X factor for me is :cop:. Is he 2019 :cop: or 2014, 2017, 2018, almost 2019 until that big save on Kucherov, 2020 Bubble, and 2021 :cop:? (Do you see where I'm going with this, Sergei? There IS a trend here and, whether you liked it or not, John Tortorella's criticism was valid. :shrug:)

TPA over YYZ in 6
I went to a Bolts game once and had dinner beforehand at a restaurant which looked directly into the lower cabins on a cruise ship. I'd like to go back to Tronnah for the HHOF.

This is going to be fun and have its fair share of snarl. :unsmigghh:

LGA over PIT in 5
I've been to NYC once. I don't get the hype. Pittsburgh is a city Artemi Panarin described as "dirty by ecology". The classic battle between New Yorkers and Yinzers.

"I'll never count Pittsburgh out of anything until they're safely on the bad end of a handshake line." MoneyPuck has PIT with a 65.1% chance to advance. This sucker could either be Rags in 5 or Pens in 7. Do the New York Rangers take command of this series? Does Igor drag them kicking and screaming into the next round in true Hank style? Or does Pittsburgh expose them for being "three star forwards, a star defenseman, and a bunch of pluggers"? No matter what happens, this series will also have its fair share of snarl (:unsmigghh:) and I hope a meteor is involved.

RDU over BOS in 7
Raleigh is A City. Durham is A City. Boston is A Bigger City and is cool in the Summer.

Canes are scary, Boston is one of those teams you can't sleep on.

CBJSprague24 fucked around with this message at 15:56 on Apr 30, 2022

Thufir
May 19, 2004

"The fucking Mayans were right."

I haven't paid much attention to hockey this year so let me try and get red-x'd faster and more completely than ever before!

Panthers over Caps in 5
Lightning over Maple Leafs in 4 (lol)

Canes over Bruins in 6
Rangers over Penguins in 7

Preds over Avs in 7 (homer pick, Preds get 1 cheesy win in the first two games on the road and then Saros miraculously comes back for the second home game)
Wild over Blues in 6

Flames over Stars in 5
Oilers over Kings in 7

HookShot
Dec 26, 2005


Panthers in 5
Lightning in 6

Bruins in 7
Rangers in 6

Avs in 5
Blues in 7

Flames in 4
Kings in 7

Bilirubin
Feb 16, 2014

The sanctioned action is to CHUG




Colorado over Nashville in 5

Calgary over Dallas in 6

Los Angeles over Edmonton in 5
let chaos rule


Minnesota over St. Louis in 6
St Paul >>> St Louis

Florida over Washington in 7
President's Trophy curse vs. Oldie Ovie

Tampa Bay over Toronto in 5
LMAO

Rangers over Pittsburgh in 6
This is basically out of spite

Carolina over Boston in 6
Also spite vote

thehoodie
Feb 8, 2011


Flames in 5
Oilers in 6
Avs in 4
Wild in 7

Rangers in 6
Bolts in 6
Cats in 5
Canes in 6

Ginette Reno
Nov 18, 2006

The more you temper a stick, the stronger it becomes

Fun Shoe

Panthers in 7. Everyone thinks the Caps will get curbstomped. I'm not so sure about that. The Caps can score goals. This might be a surprisingly competitive series, IF Ovechkin is healthy and able to play, which I assume he will be.

Leafs in 7. This a lovely pull for the Leafs since Tampa is quite good. I think this is finally the year they win a playoff round though.

Bruins in 6. Carolina is the better team but the Bruins are always annoyingly good in the playoffs and find a way to win and I don't think this year is any different.

Penguins in 6. I don't strongly believe in this one at all but I feel like every single person is gonna pick the Rangers here based on how the Pens finished the season so I'm gonna go against the grain. The truth is that as much as PAS has complained, the Pens are as good or better than the Rangers if they play the way they're capable of. They might be too old and gassed to do that though. Also outside of the one beatdown the Rangers gave them every other game between the two was quite close.

Avalanche in 5. They've got something to prove in the playoffs and Saaros is hurt. Colorado will be too much for Nashville to handle.

Blues in 6. I don't have a ton to say about this one. I just think the Blues are a little more battle tested playoff-wise and the Wild are gonna have to feel their way through the series' first few games. That might be enough to give the Blues the edge. Pretty even matchup on paper.

Calgary in 5. Dallas is well....not good. Negative goal differential team versus team that is +85. Unless Gaudreau pulls a disappearing act I don't see how this is anything but a Calgary stomp.

Oilers in 6. There's a lot I don't trust about the Oilers but I think they're enough better than the Kings to comfortably win this series.


Goals scored: 304
Cup final: Avalanche in 6

Ginette Reno fucked around with this message at 23:58 on May 1, 2022

clean ayers act
Aug 13, 2007

How do I shot puck!?

flames over stars in 5
Oilers over Kings in 6
Avs over preds in 5
Blues over wild in 7

panthers over caps in 6
lightning over leafs in 7
canes over bruins in 6
penguins over rangers in 7

Goals scored: 280
Cup final: Panthers in 7

clean ayers act fucked around with this message at 00:38 on May 1, 2022

whatis
Jun 6, 2012


Avs in 5
Wild in 5
Flames in 4
Oilers in 6

Panthers in 7
Lightning in 6
Hurricanes in 6
Rangers in 5

Goals scored: 264
Cup finals: Flames in 6

edit: changed format for that one guy

whatis fucked around with this message at 20:00 on Apr 30, 2022

The Black Stones
May 7, 2007

I POSTED WHAT NOW!?


Iíll take a wildly incorrect stab at things

West

Flames beats Stars in 5

Oilers beats Kings in 6

AVís beat Preds in 4

Wild beat Blues in 7

East

Panthers beat Caps in 6

Leafs beat Lightning in 7

Bruins beat Canes in 7

Rangers beat Pens in 7

Furnaceface
Oct 21, 2004






Bring on the red X's, I am here to show how little I know about playoff hockey!

West:

COL over NSH in 6
MIN over STL in 6
DAL over CGY in 7
EDM over LAK in 7

East:

FLA over WSH in 4
TBL over TOR in 4
BOS over CAR in 5
NYR over PIT in 5

e for bonus points:

Goals scored: 369
Cup Winner: TBL in 5

Furnaceface fucked around with this message at 19:45 on Apr 30, 2022

Powershift
Nov 23, 2009




I'll do the red Xs again but if you can include in your posts formatting In the same order like my prediction here it would be helpful. And add a goals scored in the first round for 5 points a hail mary prediction worth 25 points for cup winning team in X games.

Avs in 5
Blues in 6
Flames in 4
Oilers in 5

Panthers in 5
Lightning in 6
Hurricanes in 4
Rangers in 7

Goals scored: 294
Cup final: Oilers in 5

I'll do the RNG, but if anybody has an animal or toddler intelligent enough to point at pictures, that would be an acceptable submission as well. DJExile starts at -2 because his team abbreviations gave me an aneurysm.

Powershift fucked around with this message at 19:24 on Apr 30, 2022

Spelling Mitsake
Oct 4, 2007


Avs in 4
Wild in 7
Flames in 5
Kings in 6

Panthers in 5
Lightning in 7
Bruins in 6
Penguins in 6

Goals scored: 242
Cup final: Lightning in 6

heehee
Sep 5, 2012

tobi tuesday is back baby


Avs in 5
Blues in 5
Flames in 5
Oilers in 5

Panthers in 4
Lightning in 7
Bruins in 6
Penguins in 7

----

Blues in 7
Flames in 7

Panthers in 7
Bruins in 5

---

Blues in 4
Panthers in 6


Goals scored: 269
Cup final: Panthers in 6

I have no clue for goals

heehee fucked around with this message at 23:24 on Apr 30, 2022

Mind_Taker
May 7, 2007





FLA over WSH in 6
TOR over TB in 7
BOS over CAR in 6
NYR over PIT in 7

COL over NSH in 5
MIN over STL in 6
CGY over DAL in 7
LA over EDM in 6

No real thought involved just my gut picks

Edit: completed bracket below:

TOR over FLA in 7
BOS over NYR in 6

COL over MIN in 6
CGY over LA in 6

BOS over TOR in 7 (lol)
COL over CGY in 7

COL over BOS in 6

Smythe: MacKinnon

First round goals: 310

Mind_Taker fucked around with this message at 23:44 on May 1, 2022

Chad Sexington
May 26, 2005

I think he made a beautiful post and did a great job and he is good.

Avs in 5
Wild in 6
Flames in 5
Oilers in 6

Panthers in 6
Lightning in 7
Hurricanes in 6
Rangers in 6

Goals scored: 285
Cup final: Avs in 6

Mr. Kite
Aug 28, 2004

To clarify, that's 10 years after next year -- so 11 years in total of our goaltender being better than yours.

FLA over WSH in 6
TB over TOR in 7
CAR over BOS in 6
NYR over PIT in 6

COL over NSH in 5
STL over MIN in 5
CGY over DAL in 7
LA over EDM in 6

DO YALL WANT A BOXC
Jul 20, 2010

HAHA! WOOOOOOO WOOO!


Fun Shoe

Avs in 5
Wild in 6
Flames in 5
Oilers in 6

Panthers in 6
Leafs in 6
Hurricanes in 6
Rangers in 5

Goals scored: 540
Cup final: Panthers in 6

---------------------------------------
(always like to do the full bracket)
Smythe: Connor McDavid

Avs in 6
Oilers in 7

Panthers in 5
Hurricanes in 5

Oilers in 7
Panthers in 7

Panthers in 6

T-Bone
Sep 14, 2004



Panthers in 5
Leafs in 6
Bruins in 7
Penguins in 5

Avalanche in 5
Blues in 7
Flames in 5
Oilers in 4

----------------

Leafs in 7
Bruins in 6

Leafs in 7

Avalanche in 6
Flames in 6

Avalanche in 6

------------------

Avalanche in 5

DJExile
Jun 27, 2007




Powershift posted:

DJExile starts at -2 because his team abbreviations gave me an aneurysm.

lmao :love:

goldrush
Sep 27, 2005

~~~No Worries~~~


West
----------
Calgary in 5
Los Angeles in 7
Colorado in 6
Minnesota in 6

East
--------
Florida in 5
Toronto in 7
Boston in 7
New York in 6

Goals scored in the first round: 304

Cup Final: Calgary in 7

Angry Asian
May 24, 2006
*BOOMSHAKALAKA*

Flames in 5
Oilers in 5
Avs in 5
Wild in 6

Panthers in 5
Lightning in 7
Bruins in 7
Rangers in 6

Goals: 269
Cup Final: Avs in 6

Albino Squirrel
Apr 25, 2003

Miosis more like meiosis


COL over NSH in 5. I don't see Nashville challenging the Avs much.

MIN over STL in 5. St. Louis is either gonna grind this out or collapse utterly at the start. I choose the latter.

EDM over LAK in 6. I still don't think LA has rebuilt enough and Mike Smith hasn't turned into a pumpkin. Yet.

CAL over DAL in 5. Too much firepower.


FLA over WSH in 5. Fancy Cats gonna score all the goals.

TOR over TBL in 7. Finally gonna break that streak. At least temporarily.

BOS over CAR in 6. Man, gently caress Tony D.

PIT over NYR in 5. The coin-flip Penguins come up heads for now.


COL over MIN in 6
EDM over CAL in 7 - this will be the greatest series in the history of hockey
FLA over TOR in 4
PIT over BOS in 6

COL over EDM in 5
FLA over PIT in 6

COL over FLA in 6

Goals scored: 420

heehee
Sep 5, 2012

tobi tuesday is back baby


o ya let me go back and add all the other series

JawKnee
Mar 24, 2007





You'll take the ride to leave this town along that yellow line

heehee
Sep 5, 2012

tobi tuesday is back baby


rangers vs lightning final lmfao

ThinkTank
Oct 23, 2007



First Round
Capitals over Panthers in 7 - Just feels like one of those years where a great team gets knocked out early for no reason.
Lightning over Leafs in 6 - You should never bet against ancient blood curses
Bruins over Hurricanes in 6 - Boston have the edge in depth and experience. Marchand and Pastrnak are over due to dominate a series.
Rangers over Penguins in 5 - Goaltending and a lack of reliable scoring from the Pens sinks them. Geno and Letang play their final games in Pittsburgh.

Avalanche over Predators in 5 - The Preds have had some good, balanced scoring this year but unless Saros returns asap this feels inevitable
Blues over Wild - The best series of the first round, both teams have played exceptionally since Christmas and neither should go out so early. It's a coin flip really.
Flames over Stars in 5 - I tend to rate play over the last six weeks pretty highly where playoff matchups are concerned and welp...
Oilers over Kings in 5 - Woodcroft has them finally realizing their potential after years of swarm derivatives. They go deep this year.

Second Round
Lightning over Capitals in 4 - Caps run out of steam and the juggernaut rolls on.
Bruins over Rangers in 7 - The makings of an all-time classic series

Blues over Avalanche in 6 - Blues don't falter after a standout series, Husso emerges as the early Conn Smythe favourite
Oilers over Flames in 5 - the BOA we all dream of becomes a bit of a letdown. Draisaitl is the story of the series.

Conference Finals
Bruins over Lightning in 6 - the streak ends for Tampas as Vasi starts to show cracks

Blues over Oilers in 7 - the Oilers come oh so close but a late 3rd period rally by St. Louis puts them into the finals against Boston once again.

Cup Finals
Blues over Bruins in 6 - a rematch of the 2019 finals is somewhat less memorable as the Blues take a 3-1 series lead and then close it out in convincing fashion in game 6.

Conn Smythe: Ville Husso
Leading Point Scorer: Brad Marchand
Obscure Penalty that Suddenly Gets Called a Lot Again: Holding
Meltdowns: 14

ThinkTank fucked around with this message at 12:56 on May 1, 2022

Eric the Mauve
May 8, 2012

Making you happy for a buck since 199X


LOL at holding ever being called in the playoffs

Duckman2008
Jan 6, 2010

TFW you see Flyers goaltending.


Grimey Drawer

Avs in 4
Blues in 7
Flames in 5
Kings in 6

Panthers in 4
Lightning in 7
Bruins in 7
Rangers in 5 (gently caress Pittsburgh)

Goals scored: 270
Cup final: Colorado beats Florida in 6

CBJSprague24
Dec 5, 2010

another game at nationwide arena. everybody keeps asking me if they can fuck the cannon. buddy, they don't even let me fuck it



Powershift posted:

I'll do the red Xs again but if you can include in your posts formatting In the same order like my prediction here it would be helpful. And add a goals scored in the first round for 5 points a hail mary prediction worth 25 points for cup winning team in X games.

As requested:
Avalanche in 4
Wild in 6
Flames in 5
Oilers in 6

Panthers in 6
Lightning in 6
Rangers in 5
Hurricanes in 7

Goals scored: 258
Cup Final: Avalanche in 6

Jhet
Jun 3, 2013


Colorado in 4
Wild in 6
Calgary in 6
Edmonton in 7

Bruins in 7
Maple Leafs in 6
Rangers in 5
Panthers in 5

Goals scored: 297
Finals: Wild in 7

Darude - Adam Sandstorm
Aug 16, 2012



Colorado over Nashville in 4
Nasvhille gonna get cooked with Big Save Dave in net.

Calgary over Dallas in 5
Flames are good Dallas is not

Edmonton over Los Angeles in 6
Oilers gonna rock the poo poo but get outgoalered in a game or two

Minnesota over St Louis in 7
Minny is good as hell

Florida over Washington in 5
All the goals

Tampa Bay over Toronto in 7
lol how could it be anything else

Pens over Rangers in 6
The Rangers are not good (coaching?) but they'll steal a pair.

Carolina over Boston in 7
gently caress Boston sports

Edit : Goals in first round 299

Darude - Adam Sandstorm fucked around with this message at 13:16 on May 2, 2022

Misanthrope
Jun 10, 2001

QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK

Avs in 5
Wild in 7
Flames in 5
Oilers in 6

Panthers in 5
Lightning in 6
Bruins in 7
Penguins in 6

GuavaMoment
Aug 13, 2006

YouTube dude


Colorado in 5
Minnesota in 6
Calgary in 5
LA in 6 even though I want the Oilers to win, Albino Squirrel had to open their stupid mouth and curse us because we can't have nice things like calling penalties when someone waterskis behind McDavid

Florida in 6
Tampa Bay in 7
Boston in 7
Pittsburgh in 7

Colorado over MIN in 6
Calgary over LA in 4 - This will be the most boring series in the history of hockey
Florida over TB in 7
Pittsburgh over BOS in 7

Colorado over CGY in 6
Florida over PIT in 5

Colorado over FLA in 4 - lol Florida
308 goals

fawning deference
Jul 4, 2018



Darude - Adam Sandstorm posted:

Colorado over Nashville in 4
Nasvhille gonna get cooked with Big Save Dave in net.

Calgary over Dallas in 5
Flames are good Dallas is not

Edmonton over Los Angeles in 6
Oilers gonna rock the poo poo but get outgoalered in a game or two

Minnesota over St Louis in 7
Minny is good as hell

Florida over Washington in 5
All the goals

Tampa Bay over Toronto in 7
lol how could it be anything else

Pens over Rangers in 6
The Rangers are not good (coaching?) but they'll steal a pair.

Carolina over Boston in 7
gently caress Boston sports

How are the Rangers "not good" in any way?

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Eric the Mauve
May 8, 2012

Making you happy for a buck since 199X


Was that post necro'd from last year or something

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