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After a bunch of comments of support from you goons, I decided to give in and try and share the stories of a misspent youth. Someone mentioned maybe a thread and prompts to help, and it seemed like a decent idea, even if it feels ego driven and an attempt for attention. So you guys can do like a Kickstarter, but stupider- you invest some time and input, I give you words in an order. And you'll probably see a bunch of my handwriting and bad poetry and art and stuff. This isn't a me thing- if other people want to use the thread for their similar poo poo, I'm good with it. I'm also cool with discussion about what I post- I'd prefer to keep it about the spirit of the writing as opposed to the technical side, but I can't get better without some hurt fee-fees. Obviously, there might be some heavy poo poo in here, so take care of yourself first. I will try and warn you guys of something super heavy, though. Thread title was an idea for a book title from 2003 if I ever hosed with one. I love alliteration, and Karbala was the first city we got to spend some time (a few days, maybe). Beautiful place. So yeah. Pester me in here. Remind me in here. I'll post poo poo in here. Any ideas, questions, prompts, whatever? Drop them below, I guess. (Mods, delete if not allowed).
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May 15, 2022 04:54
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   E- let me know of this doesn't work for people.
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May 15, 2022 05:40
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Some poems I wrote a bit ago. TW: Death Untitled, but about a gun team.  Untitled. I will let this one be it's own.  
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May 15, 2022 05:55
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Just caught up on the thread. I still feel like I'm ego surfing, and I still feel 'weird' about it, but effort. Thank you all for the compliments and kind words (sounds sarcastic, but it's not. I'm learning how to handle praise/positivity, so bear with me). Don't give me too much credit- I'm sure I'll end up repeating phrases a bunch. To paraphrase Sarah Maclaughlin, art is like birth- easy, quick delivery with no labor...or a screaming bloody c-section ripped open. I'll try to keep my writing a little cleaner, but if this works for y'all, works for me. I'm not going to promise a regular schedule for posts- but it will probably be little sprints of a few pages at a time. E- I put the killing poem early, because it's why you don't ask. I should probably clarify that at some point. bulletsponge13 fucked around with this message at 16:16 on May 15, 2022 |
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May 15, 2022 15:41
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Humbug Scoolbus posted:I'm in for the whole story. Everybody's war is different. I know mine was not the same as yours. That's the thing that makes it intrinsically difficult. I don't feel like my experiences were anything but ordinary, normal poo poo. I'm just starting to realize at 40, that no, most people do not have a frame of reference for some of my experiences. I felt like everything was normal, day to day mundane stuff. Apparently, I'm wrong sometimes. Don't tell my wife- she'll get ideas above her station.
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May 15, 2022 16:43
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M_Gargantua posted:Would I be good to transcribe them as you post them? I would never ask such a thing. If you would like to, I am ok with it, but never feel it's obligated or expected, and would not have my feelings hurt if you change your mind. drat, y'all some supportive motherfuckers. E- I feel bad, and will put together a proper response and appreciation for individual comments later tonight. bulletsponge13 fucked around with this message at 19:26 on May 15, 2022 |
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May 15, 2022 19:19
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Wasabi the J posted:It also feels weird because you're probably not used to being praised for your Praise is not a thing to me as a concept. Hearing praise automatically makes me assume the messenger is unreliable. I'm working on it. To me, nothing is learned from praise. AARs were 50% circle jerk to me. Turns out, kids need love and affection. Someone should tell my parents. Lol E- I appreciate praise, and am learning on accepting it, and recognizing it. Baby steps.
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May 15, 2022 22:18
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Wasabi the J posted:To paraphrase and add to my wife's weekly prompt: In a same vein, I always loved a piece of advice Hemmingway gave- "Just write one perfect sentence a day." Smug gently caress. Love the guy.
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May 15, 2022 22:20
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May 15, 2022 23:55
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Wasabi the J posted:Yeah but I have ADHD pattern anxiety so I had to drop the idealistic poo poo, otherwise nothing I do would be "perfect". Reads? Like my current reading list, favorite books, ?? I want to answer but I don't know how. Lol
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May 17, 2022 01:26
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Let me start with no, thank YOU. It's your project- you guys spawned this from my spicy nostalgia posts, and I'm incredibly thankful you guys have been this open and supportive. I fear that writing will be a high point, but whatever. It's still out there, and maybe someone will find all this nonsense useful. Because by and large, it ain't useful to me. Penmanship- Flattery will get you everywhere. It's nice, because my penmanship has gone downhill a bit due to complications from collecting concussions. And it's mostly the pens. I use mostly fountain pens because the tactile feedback is pleasant to me, and I feel fancy. Which is cool. I promise not everything will be a downer- I have some half started stuff from a notebook, and a ton of good/fun memories. This isn't one. More will come from this incident, but I wanted to get this out because it still bites after 20 years. I carry no blame in her death, but I do carry the obligation to make sure this unnamed little girl isn't just a nightmare. This came spilling out after a brutish therapy session.  This one is about coming off combat high, and my poor truck, D-52  A classic paratrooper tale of demo and deception.     
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May 17, 2022 03:38
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Comrade Blyatlov posted:For what it's worth, I found writing about my experiences with alcohol both a release and deeply introspective. I hope this gives you something similar. My wife asked me about that. Rarely do I feel relief at getting things out. It's less a release, and more like I hope someone else finds something from it. I was alone most of my childhood. I didn't have a lot of social opportunities in HS, because I was just trying to get by. Loneliness breeds introspection, and introspection isn't far off from criticism, and I can do that.
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May 17, 2022 03:54
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Carteret posted:Your writing is from the same period I was active and I'm getting this weird nostalgia from your stories, reminding me of the guys I served with that hit my unit in Bragg 6-12 months before I did and went on the deployment I missed, telling me their good and bad stories over beers in the barracks and long day's in the motorpool. Ha! Not sure who/where you were at Bragg, but I spent my time with D 3/325
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May 17, 2022 04:10
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mischief posted:I don't know how much you've written and scanned but honestly, there's a boatload of books published successfully on the topic that are objectively worse than what you have shared. Look at publishing, seriously. I've written a decent amount in fits and shits, but nothing as solid as this stuff. You've seen all the poo poo I've scanned so far. I also have some other art type stuff scattered around- one I only have a crappy pic of, because I gifted it to a friend who asked for it. I'm not sure if this is the right place to share the more visual stuff, but it's my thread until the mods say otherwise, so 
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May 17, 2022 04:23
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Carteret posted:I wasn't in Division, I was with 101st Chem under XVIII ABC. They went with 1st MEU and had just finished demobing when I in-processed in Jan 04. I get the drive and desire, but you didn't miss out on anything worthwhile other than hazard pay. Really. I don't get extra benefits because I nearly got killed a bunch of times. My GI Bill is the same as yours. One of my best friends enlisted a couple months after me. Intel dude spent 3 years in England. He spent his off time seeing Paris and Prague. Doing road trips to Barcelona. Don't get me wrong, I wasted a lot of possible travel opportunities for a variety of reasons, but half my enlistment was deployed. While he was getting a free hand job in Amsterdam, I was getting blown up. The lasting gifts I got from deployment, empathy and exhaustion, I could have gotten cheaper somewhere else. Deployment- even getting one- is luck. Your experience down range, luck. And even the luckiest I know had some bad loving luck.
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May 17, 2022 04:38
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I'll clean off my desk tomorrow so I have a dedicated spot, and my handwriting will improve.    E- I know I have a problem with changing tenses. Sorry. These are all very drafty. bulletsponge13 fucked around with this message at 03:17 on May 18, 2022 |
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May 18, 2022 02:44
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Wasabi the J posted:You sucked up to Hemingway, I figured maybe you just had some books or stories that perhaps you had drawn from. As a kid I read a bit of Hemmingway, Heinlein, and other pop culture type stuff. I never got super into fiction as a whole, but have always been a bit of a reader. I read a lot of poetry- Dickinson, Frost, the typical depressed teenage poo poo. 90+% of my reading is nonfiction, military history/science based. A lot of comic writer influences- Chuck Dixon (too bad he turned into a massive POS), Frank Miller (see above), Garth Ennis. James O'Barr gets a lot of credit for introducing me to a greater variety of poetry, and a special mention of Henry Rollins. E2- I completely forgot to list Kipling under poetry. I feel weird that this is so touching to everyone. I'm mot a perfectionist, but I keep re-reading it on my screen and finding things I want to say are missing. Like in the C4 bit, I did no physical descriptions of the actual place, which was beautiful and lively. Going to the bridge and seeing throngs of people smiling about their day while I'm standing next to a JDAM hole. But drafts, I guess? E- you guys are seriously way too kind. bulletsponge13 fucked around with this message at 18:49 on May 18, 2022 |
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May 18, 2022 05:01
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fresh_cheese posted:I hear you when you say you dont think what youre doing is that big a deal. When you are really good at something it feels too easy and comes naturally, and it is difficult to understand why everyone else is reacting to it like they are. I don't even think anything I've shared is extraordinary. I just like sharing stories; I'm the dude at the party who is the entertainment, the goofy one cracking jokes and telling self depreciating stories. I'm a big goofy kid. I'm just trying to translate some of my stories to paper. It's not that I don't believe you all- I do, and I am sincerely touched that this thread is up so many people's vibe. And I'm aware that my next statement sounds like lunacy, but I've been dicking around on these forums for awhile, and I feel like you guys 'know' me. I believe everything you say, but I'm still fighting that little voice saying "And mom called you handsome", like you guys are giving me grace because you know me. Insane, I know. Believe it or not, I'm not really a humble dude. I know what I am and who I am, and don't feel the need to feed my ego in either direction. My dismissiveness isn't meant to be rude, or to imply I don't deeply appreciate the sentiments shared, it's just one of those things where i can't see it from the other side. I'm not fishing for compliments or anything like that; I just really can't see 'viewer' side of the paper. I'm trying. And I really appreciate everyone who reads this stuff. Even if you don't comment, even if you don't like what I share, your investment in the thread is amazing, and unexpected.
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May 18, 2022 22:32
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Hyperlynx posted:For what it's worth: I'm not a veteran, nor a regular contributor to GiP - I just like the Idiots thread - and I don't know you from a bar of soap. You are good- no one has said anything that will scare me off. 😊I just need to STFU and listen to others. You guys might think I'm just saying this, but it's my honor that you guys dig this. This is your thread as much as mine.
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May 18, 2022 23:24
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Voyager I posted:people who actively seek authority are often the sort of people who should absolutely never have any ❤
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May 19, 2022 00:24
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Nothing going up tonight; Didn't get what I wanted done. More coming tomorrow.
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May 19, 2022 04:52
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I'm just gonna shut up and go with the flow. Sorry I'm difficult- part of my charm. It just feels strange. I've never been shy about sharing details and stories from my service- but writing it out is unusual and still feels...i dunno. Unnatural.       Edit- I wanted to share this, because it bugs me and y'all made me figure this out. I was the last in my company to draw R&R or leave; after my CO, who never left the wire. After my 1SG. After my PSG, Team Leader, and Squad Leader. No wonder I feel so drained of ambition and tired all the time. I spent 230+ days operational before a break my first tour. 230 days of daily operations, patrols, raids, and poo poo shows. 230 days of being on edge, getting popped at, and being hassled. What kind of loving lunatics look at the situation, "Hmm. Woody has been wounded, refused medevac. He's been a part of every major operation, volunteered for the tough assignments. He's the only member of his truck team to not get a break. Better send home Sgt Carter, the POS supply sergeant who only left the wire when we left the country." bulletsponge13 fucked around with this message at 04:09 on May 20, 2022 |
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May 20, 2022 03:13
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SerthVarnee posted:First up: 2nd thing first- I got you. It's because I'm using both sides, which I can knock off, no big deal. Bought new notebook yesterday, too! 😊 In the book Armor by John Steakley, a companion piece to Starship Troopers that focuses on the individual in combat. The main character falls through the admin cracks and just keeps getting put out. I realized the same thing happened to me- so long as I came out whole, they would keep sending me, and I'd keep asking. I can't fully blame the Unit- it was kids leading kids- but as a leader you take care of your people, they'll take care of you. And I had no clue how or when to advocate for myself. But loving hell. Everyday. Every drat mission. Every drat operation. Every raid. It doesn't help that we had two Anti Armor platoons to cover an area covered by 2 Infantry companies. We had the trucks, after all. The song 'I Was Only 19' was always heavy, but I turned 19 on that loving Island. 230+ days where there was work to be done. Not saying I didn't get a few hours here and there to gently caress around, but they were always sandwiched between work, running ragged because 'poo poo's Gotta Get Done, Sir'. My Daughter is 18. My Son is turning 17. I cannot fathom the idea of them being in that situation. E- the Unit meaning my company, not to be confused with CAG. bulletsponge13 fucked around with this message at 14:54 on May 20, 2022 |
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May 20, 2022 14:43
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stealie72 posted:Pretty unrelated, but if this resonated with you and you haven't already, read The Light Brigade by Kameron Hurley. It came out in the last few years and kind of uses Armor as a starting point for things to get much, much trippyer. I hadn't heard of it, but will add it. I know Steakley was working on Armor 2 when he passed, but was released ad hoc and unfiished. Starship Troopers, Armor, and The Forever War by Joe Haldeman serve as a trilogy- the first the grand scale, sanitized view. Armor being the brutal personal elements of warfare, including being forgotten and abandoned by leadership. The Forever War is post war, dealing with alienation and how was changes you. E- My therapist loves you guys.
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May 20, 2022 17:34
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stealie72 posted:The Forever War legit blew my drat mind. It's one of those books that you want to somehow erase from your mind so that you can read it again. The first time I read it, I immediately started over because the time dilation hosed with my head so much. It's a wonderful and simple mechanic to explain changes. You don't feel different, but the whole world went on without you. Your best friends just won't click the same. It's tough.
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May 20, 2022 17:59
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Ok, I think I got enough in me for a little tonight. One will be a story about children and wildlife management. You guys pick: -My Favorite War Crime Or -Examples of Iraqi Mental Health
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May 20, 2022 23:43
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I want you all to know I really want to ignore your vote to be an rear end in a top hat. But I won't. Something will go up later tonight, tomorrow morning at the latest.
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May 21, 2022 01:46
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Sorry- didn't get enough down to finish a piece for tonight. But I wanted to do my daily thanks for you guys. I honestly expected this thread to be dead already; I expected maybe one or two posters will comment, maybe a few more will read; I totally expected any sane reader to blow off the entire endeavor- scans of handwriting in the 21st century seems like it might be legal punishment in Alabama. So thanks. It's really encouraging to see you guys commenting your enjoyment. It really is about you guys, too- 'war stories' of all types are a communal event. For thousands of years, these stories would have been shared by a fire, drinking, the storyteller finding volume from the listeners. Shay, in his works "Achilles in Vietnam" and "Odysseus in America" (among hundreds of others) theorize it was not only a way to pass on the wisdom and humor, but the bond around the fire allowed the Warriors (which I hate the term as applied in modern times) to decompress in steps, and the support of the community to ease the healing of wounds. That by listening, they bear some of the burden. That's what this is, and thank you.
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May 21, 2022 04:42
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SerthVarnee posted:Holy poo poo can I ever relate to those two statements (well okay in my case enjoyment might be the wrong word, but the captured attention and super supportive posters for sure). I've lurked that thread off and on, and have found it incredibly informative. It's honestly made me a little more aware of possible triggers in the world.
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May 21, 2022 07:02
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Lead out in cuffs posted:Just adding to the chorus of support here. Please, please, keep writing! Super dope of you to pull them out and post them. I will never be as cool as that Bomb Tech. I had a rough therapy session yesterday (bad enough my therapist needed to decompress and self care) it's just hitting me. I have a piece partially finished; but after posting a piece I kept getting interrupted on, I don't want to put up something like that again. I just don't want you guys to think I bailed or anything, but I want to at least feel like I did quality (not a strive for perfection. I'm not editing or anything, you guys still get the raw drafty nonsense. I'm up to a few pages (5, I think. Front side only for legibility) and about halfway, so it should be worth a wait.
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May 22, 2022 03:08
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May 24, 2022 02:22
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I don't know how to translate that absolute absurdity of watching Paratroopers try to corral that Tasmanian devil girl. It was actually really funny to watch.
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May 24, 2022 03:52
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Madurai posted:Bear Kid is the real MVP of this chapter. Bear kid rules. These (with the exception of 'Lie', which is the first time anyone has seen that admission) are all typically my favorite stories to tell verbally, because acting out the various parts is fun, so while something gets lost in this translation, I'm glad it still works.
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May 24, 2022 14:09
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stealie72 posted:I've read a bunch of the critically acclaimed books on the forever war (I'm a filthy civvy that didn't participate), and I don't think any one of them has painted as much of a picture of the Iraqi civilians as just some people trying to get through the day like everyone else. I loved reading these. If it's ok with the thread, I'd like to write a response to this sentiment. Not in a negative way or anything- it's just in a similar vein to what some friends have said to me.
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May 24, 2022 15:25
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May 25, 2022 04:28
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Sketch from therapy
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May 25, 2022 05:25
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fresh_cheese posted:Posting again to apologize for finding the theoretical background for the nick funny. Lol- dude, you cool. I ain't soft skinned. Woody was shortened from my last name; I'm just a doofy looking dude. I appreciate the concern, tho. 😊
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May 25, 2022 12:39
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Pikehead posted:My father was deployed to Vietnam as an National Serviceman - essentially a number was picked out of ~30 others and it was the same number as the day he was born on a particular month. The Australian government then gave him (essentially) a choice: join the army and probably go to Vietnam or go to jail. I'm glad I could do that. I wish I could explain how much this comment meant to me. I am just sharing some experiences, and hoping they are valuable beyond 'funny' or 'entertaining'. My Grandfather was a Marine in Vietnam. He never spoke of it. When I came back from Iraq my first tour, he chased all the grandkids and family from the house, and handed me a beer. The only time I saw the man drink my entire life. He didn't ask me anything. He didn't converse with me about my experiences. He sat down, "You saw some things." That was the extent of our conversation. I can't speak to the experiences of all troopers, but I know mine is slightly on the side of hosed.
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May 25, 2022 12:49
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Go for it! E- I wonder if half of the value in this is that it's handwritten and pure. bulletsponge13 fucked around with this message at 16:47 on May 25, 2022 |
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May 25, 2022 13:48
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 Thought this was a fun place to share this. I asked Uncle Sugar if he could fill in some blanks on what I did. I'm not allowed to know what I did. Wait until they figure out I never had a clearance, and did some things that def required a clearance.
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May 25, 2022 20:43
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