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Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

the guy that puts way too much effort into curating zoom background pictures

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Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

qirex posted:

guy who still uses his laptop's built in mic 2 years into remote work

to be fair, the built-in mics on macs are better than a lot of others people use

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

PokeJoe posted:

Guy who's clearly pretending to work while vacationing and will go offline right after the meeting ends

hell yeah

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

guy that talks about the weather at the beginning of every meeting and then contributes nothing of value

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

carry on then posted:

guy who calls in with his phone with terrible sound quality even though he's sitting in front of a computer with a headset that would make him much more audible

power move

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

gently caress SNEEP posted:

guy who doesn't check his video conferencing app settings every time it launches

triggered

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

Trimson Grondag 3 posted:

wants to talk about politics guy

wants to talk about politics until he says "this is why you shouldnt talk about politics at work" at the first sign that you dont 100% agree with him guy

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

graph posted:

cisco held an 'addressing hate and gun violence' allhands last week or smth and some guy raised his hand and said 'why dont black people just behave if they dont want to get executed by police' , incredible stuff

lol

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

my homie dhall posted:

guy eating his own boogers on camera

don’t doxx me plz

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

AnimeIsTrash posted:

guy who reply all's a meeting invite with 153 people

guy who replies all to the reply all asking to be removed from the email string

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

dioxazine posted:

guy who schedules a friday meeting with two teams that he doesn't lead and rambles on for three hours (today)

:thermidor:

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

dude masturbating and not noticing the camera is on during a meeting

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

person who organized the meeting that has to leave early, says they’ll leave the room up for everyone to continue in, and then mashes the end meeting for all button, every single time

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

why would anyone want people to be concise in meetings instead of just let them ramble forever so you can just zone out and work less?

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

lol if you listen in meetings

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

post hole digger posted:

guy who is posting during the meeting

this is a doxx free zone

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

Corla Plankun posted:

guy who screenshares to show us something and accidentally reveals that he only barely knows how to use his computer as he mouses all over the screen trying to figure out how to find and reopen the app he used to make a diagram yesterday

guy who asks you to reforward the email that he/she's copied on and came in less than 24 hours ago because they're too lazy to find it themselves in their inbox

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

Sapozhnik posted:

Guy who just rolled out of bed and opened his laptop and hasn't showered yet

uh, this presumes you shower at least once a day??? smdh

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

im systematically late to every meeting i ever join

fashionably late power move

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

post hole digger posted:

guy who slacks you 90 seconds after a meeting start time to ask if you are joining

don’t doxx my boss

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

guy that IMs you 4 minutes before the meeting for updates relevant to the meeting

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

go play outside Skyler posted:

the 4 people in the same room using a logitech base station and talking to each other inaudibly while you sit at home

best kinda meeting, white noise generator

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

PIZZA.BAT posted:

the scrum master who doesn't cancel the morning standup even though the only person joining is the guy who's leaving the company in three days while everyone else is on break. just so they can say, 'everyone else is on break and you don't have any items assigned to you but do you have any updates?'

and when they're told no they go through each ticket anyways to ask if there's any updates on each one

thank loving god i'm leaving this place

why would you even show up to that?

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

post hole digger posted:

love to ahve someone else schedule a 1-1 meeting with me and then no show. best of all possible worlds -- i get to be indignant about their no-show, PLUS I dont have to have a meeting.

power move

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

Poopernickel posted:

I’m jealous. I work for a company with an office in Germany and one in the Bay Area. I was told that I’d have 7AM meetings once or twice month during the interview process.

Turns out it’s more like 3 times a week.

just dont show up for them

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

giogadi posted:

person who, whenever they start talking, you gotta try really hard not to roll your eyes on camera because you know whatever they’re about to say is gonna be hella stupid

my boss?

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

always 👏 be 👏 away 👏 (and not working)

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

my homie dhall posted:

guy who is turning the meeting into his personal therapy session

it’s me (when the boss is away)

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

go play outside Skyler posted:

guy who literally hosed during a meeting (but triple checked he was on mute)

:quagmire:

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

post hole digger posted:

i had someone message me 2 minutes BEFORE the meeting's scheduled start time to ask me if i was going to join. are you loving high

reply 18 minutes later with “sorry, just saw this” and nothing else

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

distortion park posted:

Used to have a PM who had a slack app that would message everyone in his meetings beforehand reminding them the meeting was about to start

distortion park posted:

I think the message included a passive aggressive tip about being on time

lmao, that would just give me more motivation to be purposefully late

Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

guy that shows up to meetings like a chump beta bitch instead of always 👏 being 👏 tentative 👏 and “double booked” alpha corporate chad

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Asymmetric POSTer
Aug 17, 2005

Cat Face Joe posted:

too much effort. just show up, agree to do anything you're asked, and then never do it

:hmmyes:

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