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Can you suck your own dick?
Yes
No
View Results
 
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Big Scary Owl
Oct 1, 2014

Too scary



You'd think that sucking yourself would be the most amazing thing in the world but no, it barely feels like anything, what a loving cursed existence that we live in where you can't even achieve nirvana by sucking your own cock. I can make myself cum by it doesn't feel as intense as normal masturbation, but for some reason I keep doing it. Any selfsuckers out here???

(also please don't try this you might break your back)

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Panic! At The Tesco
Aug 19, 2005

POGCHUMP !

#essereFerrari





i wouldn't know i'm fat and have a small dick

DONKEY SALAMI
Jun 28, 2008

donkey? donkey?



Cuppa da balls

Strumpie
Dec 8, 2012


it was worth doing a couple times as a teen.
way too much effort now, even if it wasn't lacklustre.

e: i'm tall, flexible and have a big dick so. don't feel left out, short, stocky, small penis havers.

rain dogs
Apr 19, 2020



Have you tried loving yourself in the rear end while you suck since you're already doing gay poo poo?

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Strumpie
Dec 8, 2012


didn't take long for the jealous folk to arrive.

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

Sorry guys, I'm just a donut.



Somebody on here said that they learned yoga just so they could do it, but that it was “like tickling yourself, it just doesn’t work”.

Samuel L. ACKSYN
Feb 29, 2008




somebody once told me it feels less like getting your dick sucked and more like sucking a dick

Big Scary Owl
Oct 1, 2014

Too scary



Nigmaetcetera posted:

Somebody on here said that they learned yoga just so they could do it, but that it was “like tickling yourself, it just doesn’t work”.


Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:

somebody once told me it feels less like getting your dick sucked and more like sucking a dick

Pretty much yes on both accounts. hosed up imo

Strumpie
Dec 8, 2012


Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:

somebody once told me it feels less like getting your dick sucked and more like sucking a dick

yeah, it's nothing like getting a blowjob.

DONKEY SALAMI
Jun 28, 2008

donkey? donkey?



If I suck the dick of the guy who sucks my dick, would that count through transitive property?

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

🚣RowboatMan: ❄️Freezing time🕰️ is an old P.I. 🥧trick...



Just get a blowjob machine, like the venus 9000 or something.

Sophy Wackles
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.







You’re probably just bad at giving blow jobs OP.

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die


Nap Ghost

it feels better if you do it like the stranger, just need to sit on your head for a while to put it to sleep first

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014



Mozi posted:

it feels better if you do it like the stranger, just need to sit on your head for a while to put it to sleep first
what are you the human pretzel?

mobby_6kl
Aug 9, 2009



Mozi posted:

it feels better if you do it like the stranger, just need to sit on your head for a while to put it to sleep first

Just do it after going to a dentist

neato burrito
Aug 25, 2002

bitch better have my chex mix


Sucking a dick doesn't make you gay, loving a man makes you gay.

Panic! At The Tesco
Aug 19, 2005

POGCHUMP !

#essereFerrari





neato burrito posted:

Sucking a dick doesn't make you gay, loving a man makes you gay.

what if i love sucking a dick?

Rahu
Feb 14, 2009



Grimey Drawer

Trevor Moore died sucking his own dick.

Stay safe out there, gbsers.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

Yeah I find that difficult to believe that there's a goon in good enough shape and sufficiently bedicked to pull this off

neato burrito
Aug 25, 2002

bitch better have my chex mix


Panic! At The Tesco posted:

what if i love sucking a dick?

Do you love the man attached to the dick?

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002



If you're tired of self-sucking and want to other-suck instead it's great relevant experience that can help you land a job at the ole dick sucking factory. They don't pay a ton but you don't get paid at all to self-suck!

Unless you're doing some kind of self-suck-stage-show at the carnival.

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002



I bet the Self-Suck-Stage-Show brings in pretty good tips.

flubber nuts
Oct 5, 2005




i could do this in high school but never really got big into the self suck scene. my back is hosed now though and i still cant do it after almost six months of yoga. i still have a dream every once in a while where im really suckin the hell put of my own donger. i wake up with a single tear rolling down my cheek at the missed oppertunities.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

Chief McHeath posted:

If you're tired of self-sucking and want to other-suck instead it's great relevant experience that can help you land a job at the ole dick sucking factory. They don't pay a ton but you don't get paid at all to self-suck!

Unless you're doing some kind of self-suck-stage-show at the carnival.

By the gods, if we hire more autofellationists we could double the cum output without increasing wages!

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

🚣RowboatMan: ❄️Freezing time🕰️ is an old P.I. 🥧trick...



Colonel Cancer posted:

sufficiently bedicked


Holy gently caress. This needs to be a username.

CPL593H
Oct 28, 2009

I know what you did last summer, and frankly I am displeased.

Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:

somebody once told me it feels less like getting your dick sucked and more like sucking a dick

I don't see the problem.

gleebster
Dec 16, 2006

Only a howler

Pillbug

Big Scary Owl posted:

You'd think that sucking yourself would be the most amazing thing in the world but no, it barely feels like anything, what a loving cursed existence that we live in where you can't even achieve nirvana by sucking your own cock. I can make myself cum by it doesn't feel as intense as normal masturbation, but for some reason I keep doing it. Any selfsuckers out here???

(also please don't try this you might break your back)

Maybe, OP, your dick is just a dull and uninteresting one.

DicktheCat
Feb 15, 2011



Chief McHeath posted:

If you're tired of self-sucking and want to other-suck instead it's great relevant experience that can help you land a job at the ole dick sucking factory. They don't pay a ton but you don't get paid at all to self-suck!

Unless you're doing some kind of self-suck-stage-show at the carnival.

Hmmm, yes, tell me more about this dick sucking factory, are they hiring?

syntaxfunction
Oct 27, 2010


rain dogs posted:

Have you tried loving yourself in the rear end while you suck since you're already doing gay poo poo?

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Look at this loser in TYOOL 2022 not loving themselves in the rear end, like a prude Christian brought up thinking labia was a type of bird loving lmao

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981



Yo momma suxk her own pussy but u don't hear me going on about it. U know what man sucka bofa deze

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981



DONKEY SALAMI posted:

Cuppa da balls

Looool yea.... 😅😔

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

Self Defense
Nil Satanus carborundum

Yeshua akbar!
(Xtian anarchisto, no bombo)



Throatfuck yourself, OP.

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002



For real let's start the Self Suck Sircus and get that drat bag you know there's a market for it

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

I broke my spine in the selfsuck mines

Dang It Bhabhi!
May 27, 2004

Girrrl, let me see them Platinum Jubblies

I’ll suck your dick for free anytime.

Bloodfart McCoy
Jul 20, 2007

That's a high quality avatar right there.


Big Scary Owl posted:

You'd think that sucking yourself would be the most amazing thing in the world but no, it barely feels like anything, what a loving cursed existence that we live in where you can't even achieve nirvana by sucking your own cock. I can make myself cum by it doesn't feel as intense as normal masturbation, but for some reason I keep doing it. Any selfsuckers out here???

(also please don't try this you might break your back)

Get a load of this guy who can’t even achieve nirvana by sucking his own dick.

I bet you just blow your load on a Kleenex pile too.

I’m LMAOing at ur lyfe.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

The only way not to lose your spiritual power whilst having sex is autofellatio

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015



flubber nuts posted:

i could do this in high school but never really got big into the self suck scene. my back is hosed now though and i still cant do it after almost six months of yoga. i still have a dream every once in a while where im really suckin the hell put of my own donger. i wake up with a single tear rolling down my cheek at the missed oppertunities.

Lol I licked my own tip once after like 20 minutes of stretching. Had to breathe out completely and hold it, but it totally worked. :woop:

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Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

Gotta keep stretching till you can eat your own rear end

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