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Goons Are Gifts

Kaiser Schnitzel posted:

i saw some comedian make a joke about getting really in shape from lexapro masturbation and it was really funny to hear 90% of the audience give a slightly confused chuckle and the other 10% give a very hearty and knowing guffaw.

I just gave one of those guffaws reading this post lol


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Goons Are Gifts

personally, i enjoy tickling a lot

<snipped for privacy, sorry future goons that might want to read this! You can pm me though I just don't want this to be googlable>

what I'm saying is, im the joker

Goons Are Gifts fucked around with this message at 09:25 on Jun 24, 2022


Goons Are Gifts

baka fwocka fwame posted:

GaG i sympathize with involuntary treatment woes

in my experience doctors are largely unsympathetic to callouts but it doesnt help that for all intents and purposes i am legally a crazy person no one should listen to. its also different here, psychiatric institutions wield incredible power over their patients where i am. patient rights advocacy is sorely needed here

oh my treatments were all on voluntary basis, I never got to the point where a doctor felt the need to actually force me to do something, worst case was when a doctor highly recommended me to do something, but that said, I was not an easy teen to treat for sure and actually I am not sure I am an easy patient to treat now honestly, i know quite well how a secure ward looks like though because I've been there a couple of times when I had to wait for a bed to open up in a regular one when I was a teenager and naturally I know a lot of patients with a lot of terrible stories to tell, both from the perspective of someone who is ill as well as someone who is treated. It's makes me incredibly mad to think how bad some systems, some hospitals, some nurses, some doctors, some therapists are and what damage those can cause on those who are the most vulnerable (I've been in one terrible place and left after a week because lol wtf), but at least I have seen enough places to know that the majority is decent and they just try to do their best with virtually no budget, no recognition, mostly fear and rejection from the outside world. Plus, if you meet just one good nurse, one good therapist, one good doctor, even if it's just for a limited time, that one person that really matches with you in therapy can change your entire life and set something in motion that, with a lot of work and a lot of effort, can give you a future that is not bad, as hard that is to believe

One famous saying I got to learn when I was 19 or so and I was in another inpatient stay for like two months or so was "It's not us who are crazy, it's those outside who are crazy. We at least are here to get help, those outside are not"


Goons Are Gifts

teen witch posted:

once I’m done with this round of meds, I’m going to see if maybe I can change over. Zoloft is ok and works but I’d like to experience pleasure and energy for once. would be cool and good.

had follow up psych appointment today and now I get to do a therapist hunt in the city. reeeeaaalllyyy hoping I can find an English speaking one, as yeah, I can speak Swedish, but I feel it cannot accurately convey what’s going on in the poison tomb known as my mind.

sad brain dump feel free to skip
I have to play hostess this weekend and I am dreading it, honestly. I’ve yet to escape the “I am a toxic piece of poo poo” mindset and frankly I’m just scared I’ll hurt more people. I don’t want to be close to anyone ever again.

so I’m going to put my self hatred into the less dangerous but equally troublesome people pleasing habit and power through this weekend. if I make everyone happy and cared for, well-being be damned, no one can be upset at me and leave. and if they do, it was my fault for not trying hard enough. if you even as so much as think about attending to your own needs you will lose those dear to you, you selfish rear end in a top hat. so live in constant fear that if you don’t make others happy, they’ll dump you like the garbage you are. have fun!!!!

I know the vast majority of all of this is bad brain wiring and things that are wholly out of my control. and yet somehow this is my fault. all of it.


It is not your fault, you are not responsible for the thoughts your brain produces or the interpretation it offers you to confirm some random, arbitrary thought about what a bad person you are. That is the sinister nature of these problems, they work on the very root of what makes up being a human, it twists your perception and causes you to, again and again, relive something that you had to endure earlier, endlessly confirming something that is false but that has to be right to make something else make sense.

I like to think of it that way, whenever my brain tries to convince me bullshit like this: I don't trust myself when I try to do something good, so why do I trust myself when I'm telling myself that I'm doing something bad?
You are always good enough and you are always valuable, no matter what your brain wants you to believe sometimes.


Goons Are Gifts

Allie posted:

i think of it more as management than anything else. it's something i just need to make sure i'm managing

I think its this, yeah, even though stuff like this are diseases, I don't think it's too useful to think of it as curing it like a disease, as in, you had it and now it's gone. Your mind is a complicated thing and everything that happens, good or bad, leaves some sort of traces and history and that history needs to be managed, usually it's easy when stuff is simple and good, but sometimes it really is not. It is terrible and unfair that it is a constant battle in some way, but in time, winning that battle keeps getting easier. It's like a constant training and you will get better at it over time and most people that I know that have to endure this fight tend to be lovely and great in general, as you keep on improving.


Goons Are Gifts

Anyone's welcome to share us much or as little as they feel like, everyone who wants to share or even just read the words of others definitely does belong here :glomp:


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I know it sounds like I don't mean it or it's some standard response or whatever, but believe me it's not and I really really feel you. Please reach out if you have really bad and dark thoughts. We have a really cool collection of links and numbers and whatnot of resources available for anyone in the mod forum, worldwide stuffs, and if you want any of that, please tell me. We have that stuff to share it with anyone who is struggling and you also always can reach out here to me or any other mod or admin both for some resource links as well just to talk, it's always good to share and not stay silent! :glomp:


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