Schadenfreude Reboot: ANIMAL CONTROL STOLE MY ASS

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Schadenfreude Reboot: ANIMAL CONTROL STOLE MY ASS

Ornamental Dingbat: Feb 26, 2007

Old thread

Post stuff that brings you dark joy, you all know how this works- please be mindful of extended derails, nothing gruesome.

quote:

Thread Rules, updated 9/12/2022 by KitConstantine

1. No combat footage or footage from an active warzone
1a. No war chat

2. No death or maiming/serious personal injury
2a. Report or PM a mod/admin about suspected death or serious injury, do not start a derail about it

3. No bloodlust

https://i.imgur.com/8AX1L6G.mp4

https://twitter.com/NoContextHumans/status/1551561066752122883?s=20&t=mZx1DpDVL4j4bT-iE4NF9w

https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_r78o0scDBu1zxgosq.mp4

Mod edit: Users have requested that tamper monkey scripts that have been shared in the thread to show controls on videos be added to the OP, so I'm quoting a couple relevant posts:

Swilo posted:

code:

// ==UserScript==
// @name               video resizing and sound
// @namespace          https://forums.somethingawful.com/
// @description        loving giant vertical recording
// @include            https://forums.somethingawful.com/*
// @grant              GM_addStyle
// ==/UserScript==

GM_addStyle("video { max-height: 1000px; max-width: 1000px;} ");

window.addEventListener("load", function() {
    $("video").attr("controls", "controls");
}, false);

Takes No Damage posted:

This one also autopauses and sets the volume to 20%

code:

// ==UserScript==
// @name        Fix videos - somethingawful.com
// @namespace   Violentmonkey Scripts
// @match       https://forums.somethingawful.com/*
// @version     1.0
// @author      -
// @description 2/27/2020, 11:56:31 PM
// ==/UserScript==

const fixVideos = setTimeout(function(){
  var videos = document.getElementsByTagName('video');
  for(var i = 0; i < videos.length; i++){
    videos[i].removeAttribute('loop');
    videos[i].controls = true;
    videos[i].pause();
    videos[i].currentTime = 0;
    videos[i].volume = 0.2;
    videos[i].muted = false;
  }
}, 500);

Somebody fucked around with this message at 08:03 on Oct 31, 2022

# ? Jul 26, 2022 02:25

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 28, 2024 10:46

Azhais: Feb 5, 2007; Switchblade Switcharoo

https://i.imgur.com/lcoEopy.mp4

# ? Jul 26, 2022 02:32

Runa: Feb 13, 2011

bringing back the classics

https://i.imgur.com/ZHsKKLC.mp4

# ? Jul 26, 2022 02:34

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

looking forward to seeing this thread fall into as many derails and slapfights as the last thread

it's my favourite kind of schadenfreude

# ? Jul 26, 2022 02:44

bell jar: Feb 25, 2009

Schadenfreude: Mike!! You piece of poo poo!!

# ? Jul 26, 2022 02:48

Hyperlynx: Sep 13, 2015

To start off the new thread right:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3uy_-H8lfJM

# ? Jul 26, 2022 02:51

Pennywise the Frown: May 10, 2010; Upset Trowel

I somehow lost it but could someone post that fix to get embedded videos to show the controls so you don't have to right click and select that every time? And to stop autoplay I think?

# ? Jul 26, 2022 02:52

rydiafan: Mar 17, 2009

Mx. posted:

looking forward to seeing this thread fall into as many derails and slapfights as the last thread

it's my favourite kind of schadenfreude

Of course you'd like that, you piece of crap.

# ? Jul 26, 2022 02:55

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

https://twitter.com/Flomp_It/status/822699862999388160

old classic

# ? Jul 26, 2022 02:57

Cythereal: Nov 8, 2009; I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

https://i.imgur.com/LwX8AXB.mp4

# ? Jul 26, 2022 02:59

SilvergunSuperman: Aug 7, 2010

Bring back the original title, if that's not enough to entice people t'hell with em

# ? Jul 26, 2022 03:06

Push El Burrito: May 9, 2006; Soiled Meat

https://i.imgur.com/GkKo75r.mp4

# ? Jul 26, 2022 03:10

Large Testicles: Jun 1, 2020; [ASK] ME ABOUT MY LOVE FOR 1'S

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Abe1W1gGXy0

# ? Jul 26, 2022 03:15

Trabant: Nov 26, 2011; All systems nominal.

Ornamental Dingbat posted:

https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_r78o0scDBu1zxgosq.mp4

Huh, it's still up.

# ? Jul 26, 2022 03:20

Big Scary Owl: Oct 1, 2014; by Fluffdaddy

Pennywise the Frown posted:

I somehow lost it but could someone post that fix to get embedded videos to show the controls so you don't have to right click and select that every time? And to stop autoplay I think?

I would also like this

# ? Jul 26, 2022 03:51

Takes No Damage: Nov 20, 2004; The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far.; Grimey Drawer

Schad on me looking forward to reading about a crazy derail that brought about closing the old thread and it was just routine DB maintenance :negative:

Big Scary Owl posted:

I would also like this

code:

// ==UserScript==
// @name               shorter videos
// @namespace          https://forums.somethingawful.com/
// @description        asdf
// @include            https://forums.somethingawful.com/*
// @grant              GM_addStyle
// ==/UserScript==

GM_addStyle("video { max-height: 650px; } ");
GM_addStyle("video { max-width: 800px; } ");

window.addEventListener("load", function() {
    $("video").attr("controls", "controls");
}, false);

e:
This one doesn't stop autoplay, I would add that bit if someone has the code from another script.

Takes No Damage fucked around with this message at 04:14 on Jul 26, 2022

# ? Jul 26, 2022 04:07

Inceltown: Aug 6, 2019

Takes No Damage posted:

e:
This one doesn't stop autoplay, I would add that bit if someone has the code from another script.

Your browser should have a setting that stops autoplay by default for videos. Firefox certainly does at least, no idea what chrome does these days.

# ? Jul 26, 2022 04:33

Lord Zedd-Repulsa: Jul 21, 2007; Devour a good book.

I just got a new laptop and was looking for the exact same thing. Thanks!

# ? Jul 26, 2022 04:38

Dillbag: Mar 4, 2007; Click here to join Lem Lee in the Hell Of Being Cut To Pieces; Nap Ghost

What's the over/under on the page number for someone posting the gif of the mentally challenged guy kicking the kid to try to stop a derail?

# ? Jul 26, 2022 04:38

CRUSTY MINGE: Mar 30, 2011; Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur

Inceltown posted:

Your browser should have a setting that stops autoplay by default for videos. Firefox certainly does at least, no idea what chrome does these days.

Chrome sucks, don't use it.

# ? Jul 26, 2022 04:45

Bloody Hedgehog: Dec 12, 2003; 💥💥🤯💥💥
Gotta nuke something

Dillbag posted:

What's the over/under on the page number for someone posting the gif of the mentally challenged guy kicking the kid to try to stop a derail?

There's a gif of you kicking a kid?

# ? Jul 26, 2022 04:47

Literally A Person: Jan 1, 1970; Can't post for 6 hours!

Bloody Hedgehog posted:

There's a gif of you kicking a kid?

heh

# ? Jul 26, 2022 04:48

Wendigee: Jul 19, 2004

Takes No Damage posted:

Schad on me looking forward to reading about a crazy derail that brought about closing the old thread and it was just routine DB maintenance
code:
// ==UserScript==
// @name               shorter videos
// @namespace          https://forums.somethingawful.com/
// @description        asdf
// @include            https://forums.somethingawful.com/*
// @grant              GM_addStyle
// ==/UserScript==

GM_addStyle("video { max-height: 650px; } ");
GM_addStyle("video { max-width: 800px; } ");

window.addEventListener("load", function() {
    $("video").attr("controls", "controls");
}, false);
e:
This one doesn't stop autoplay, I would add that bit if someone has the code from another script.

Does this work on the app somehow? Or is this like a grease monkey thing for windows? I hate that video controls don't show up in the app unless i click and select it.

My phone might actually be doing that I think it is a Windows thing in dumb. This is for grease monkey though?

Wendigee fucked around with this message at 04:56 on Jul 26, 2022

# ? Jul 26, 2022 04:54

limp_cheese: Sep 10, 2007; Nothing to see here. Move along.

Here's to old favorites.

https://i.imgur.com/cKZ7BJa.mp4

# ? Jul 26, 2022 04:54

Inceltown: Aug 6, 2019

Wendigee posted:

Does this work on the app somehow? Or is this like a grease monkey thing for windows? I hate that video controls don't show up in the app unless i click and select it.

My phone might actually be doing that I think it is a Windows thing in dumb. This is for grease monkey though?

Greasemonkey is compromised but yes. It's for the *monkey alternatives to it. There isn't any way to do inject scripting into the apps afaik.

# ? Jul 26, 2022 05:01

BrianBoitano: Nov 15, 2006; this is fine

https://i.imgur.com/YECbLjq.mp4

https://i.imgur.com/OGl1Yt7.mp4

# ? Jul 26, 2022 05:10

SilvergunSuperman: Aug 7, 2010

That last one is beautiful

# ? Jul 26, 2022 05:26

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

Bloody Hedgehog posted:

There's a gif of you kicking a kid?

lol

# ? Jul 26, 2022 05:28

Dragonstoned: Jan 15, 2006; MR. DOG WITH BEES IN HIS MOUTH AND WHEN HE BARKS HE SHOOTS BEES AT YOU
by Roger Hargreaves

Mx. posted:

looking forward to seeing this thread fall into as many derails and slapfights as the last thread

it's my favourite kind of schadenfreude

It wouldn't be the schad thread without the derails and meltdowns

I see the derails as our karma for enjoying the schadenfreude in the first place

# ? Jul 26, 2022 05:32

Mister Speaker: May 8, 2007; WE WILL CONTROL
ALL THAT YOU SEE
AND HEAR

PI�ATA

https://i.imgur.com/svlpEsk.mp4

https://i.imgur.com/rY6mfAV.mp4

# ? Jul 26, 2022 05:38

bell jar: Feb 25, 2009

Bloody Hedgehog posted:

There's a gif of you kicking a kid?

# ? Jul 26, 2022 05:58

YeahTubaMike: Mar 24, 2005; *hic* Gotta finish thish . . .; Doctor Rope

Bloody Hedgehog posted:

There's a gif of you kicking a kid?

# ? Jul 26, 2022 06:22

Regular Wario: Mar 27, 2010; Slippery Tilde

Azhais posted:

https://i.imgur.com/lcoEopy.mp4

What does purple smoke signify? Is she having a litter of eggplants?

# ? Jul 26, 2022 06:25

ante: Apr 9, 2005; SUNSHINE AND RAINBOWS

She's having a Grimace

# ? Jul 26, 2022 06:27

Le Faye Morgaine: Feb 1, 2022

the kid is bisexual. end bi erasure. :hai:

# ? Jul 26, 2022 06:50

Takes No Damage: Nov 20, 2004; The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far.; Grimey Drawer

Inceltown posted:

Greasemonkey is compromised but yes. It's for the *monkey alternatives to it. There isn't any way to do inject scripting into the apps afaik.

Last I checked ViolentMonkey was the new hotness, but yeah that and similar scripts are for the *Monkey browser extensions.

# ? Jul 26, 2022 07:46

Bottom Liner: Feb 15, 2006; a specific vein of lasagna

ante posted:

She's having a Grimace

i havent spit water on my monitor in a long time. gently caress you

# ? Jul 26, 2022 08:06

Milo and POTUS: Sep 3, 2017; I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?