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 Did you miss signups but want to participate anyway? PM me or post in here to that effect before Dec 10 Friends, I have come with grave news. The ancient specter haunting GBS has lurched to life once again, and it falls to us to sate its horrific requirements. Fortunately, with the passing of Halloween, said fell unthinkable requirements are recast in the healing light of holiday cheer and absurdism. What does this mean for you? Mostly good things, probably, unless you work as a mail carrier. Also bees. I am but a tender babe, of late weaned; what- Yes fine good. This is Something Awful Secret Santa (patch 2020.2 Fearful Dramaturge edition): There are many like it, but this one belongs to GBS, and is accordingly perhaps less focused in subject. In it, you provide your personal details to a website, which then - provided you validate your bona fides as an actual member of these forums in possession of a functioning email account - will assign you a different goon on Dec 1 to whom you should send a present. In turn, you will receive a present from a different, third goon. Experiments involving a fourth goon lead to too many fall accidents. Historically I have found it a great driver of holiday cheer. My alleged family doesn't understand classy humor, and cruelly insisted I transport the 500 copies of the Friends DVD box set I purchased them away from their home myself. The indignity! But you, dear goons, I know you would never. "General" focus, eh? What should I actually send? Are there limits? Well, yeah. You should try to send something you're confident your recipient will actually like. Light e-stalking is encouraged (don't be weird about it, we're talking post histories and maybe a quick google), posting in this thread about your likes and Essential Nature is encouraged, and once assigned there will be an anonymous messaging function on the site you can use to contact your santa (and santee (not at the same time (file a feature request if you want that))). Whatever you send, expect to receive something worth 0-20 dollars. Going above and beyond is permitted, but not required. It may also be drop-shipped. Whatever you send, try to make it fun! Posting a thank-you to your santa in this thread once you open your present is strongly encouraged. If you would like to get an idea of the vibe, last year's thread is here: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3985259 Can I send something handmade? YES DO IT HELL YEAH though maybe check in with your santee about allergies or whatever. What if I can't afford to send internationally? Totally understandable, so the site lets you specify whether you're willing to ship internationally, regionally (e.g. US/CA/MX is one region, the EU is one region, etc), or only within your own country. I have security concerns and don't want to be doxxed. Well, there's no getting out of them having your SA username and address. You don't necessarily have to give them your real name - the US post office is usually pretty chill about "sure, I guess JIMP_JAMPS_420_YEEHAW_[XXL] lives at this address, why not" for example, though it is always some kind of risk. You'll have to make your own determination there. I signed up where the gently caress is my santee The order of events goes like this: Now: Registration is open Dec 4: Registration closes, assignments issued Dec 14: You are encouraged to have sent out your gifts, to ensure they are received by Christmas You got your order of operations wrong idiot, where do I sign up Right here! https://sass.operationcitadel.net/ What if my santee got banned? Unless their behavior was perma-level egregious, I like to say they're not banned from Christmas. You can contact me if it's fraught for any reason and we'll figure it out. What if there aren't enough people? This sometimes happens to people selecting "same country only". I try to maximize international-ness for people who are in the international 'regions', because that's kind of exciting, and also it kind of sucks to spend $50 on shipping yourself and receive something from the next city down. If your preferences mean I have no way to assign you, I'll contact you as we draw close to assignment time. e: to be clearer, I will not assign you an international recipient without asking you beforehand if you didn't opt into that up front. The site is erroring  Sorry, I'll kick it back to life as soon as I can. I'll be watching the thread regularly. I'm not getting my verification email! Check your spam folder, the irregularity of this event (and the sparse-ness of the email) complicates getting email providers to trust it. If it persists, contact me and I'll look into it. WHERE ARE THE BEES YOU gently caress i got u b: https://i.imgur.com/PTqJscN.png tiaz fucked around with this message at 21:32 on Dec 6, 2022 |
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Nov 16, 2022 06:22
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gently caress YISS SASS TIME Edit: Should probably put in details here. Hello goons! I've been doing SASS for a while here and it's still a great time of the year. My wife and I are currently over in South Korea as part of my last assignment in the Army, and are getting ready for a big move after the holiday season. We're both avid readers and writers, she does digital artwork, I play games and shitpost. TO SANTA: Send whatever you like aside from obscene materials or anything with drugs. Customs here is really jumpy and will rifle through stuff if there's anything too terrible in the packaging. Haven't had it happen in a SASS, but it has happened with other stuff we've gotten. TO SANTEE: Expect some pottery, some snacks, and I'll do my best to see to your interests! Can't wait to see who we meet this year! J.A.B.C. fucked around with this message at 23:28 on Nov 21, 2022 |
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Nov 16, 2022 10:12
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YASS for SASS!
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Nov 16, 2022 17:28
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I am so signing up! This is like my 15th year of doing this! Edit: but not until I get home. The school district is blocking the website... Dear Santa: I'm a 60 year old Science Teacher. I really like sciency stuff. Anything that will teach me something, or I can share with my 7th and 8th grade students (Science toys are great!) also, Mrs. Genesplicer and I really like travel and regional things, so feel free to send stuff from your neighborhood. We also have a large supply of dogs and cats, so there's that. Hello Santee! There is no telling what will happen to you. I might send something regional, or a container of toad mucus. It might be handmade art, or a book about English tippytoe dancing. There is no telling! So, make sure you have a decently large post history I can go into, otherwise I'll send you something frightening. Genesplicer fucked around with this message at 22:36 on Nov 30, 2022 |
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Nov 16, 2022 20:00
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Nov 16, 2022 20:13
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tiaz posted:
500 Internal Server Error does this mean I'm registered
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Nov 16, 2022 20:44
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Awwww yisssssss WE RIDE TO FUN TIMES SHARED!! Santa: Loves me some TTRPGs with a growing collection of indie and mainstream titles. Am witchy with a focus on divination and talisman crafting. (hopy ship that reads like a subclass X3) MASSIVE animation fan with Owl House and Spy X Family being current favorites. Board games are a big hit around here, too (sci-fi, co-op, and deck builders in particular). Love art/crafted things by my Santa, stuffs related to the above interests, any local tasty things, and hearing a bit about my Santa. Santee: You cannot prepare yourself. The terror is scarcely fathomable by we meek wretches on this meager plane of reality. The horror, though eventually knowable, has caused countless masses to quail in despair that their fates are irrevocably altered. For better? For worse? Only the writhing sleepless beings can wrench understanding from such circumstances. BEWARE. (frsrs, tho, will be good and fun, and a talisman of some kind as I'm witchy (unless you request one not be made)). Shy and Shameless fucked around with this message at 06:56 on Nov 29, 2022 |
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Nov 16, 2022 21:20
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eekabeep posted:500 Internal Server Error It means you aren't. Did you leave any fields blank? It looks like I missed error checking if you didn't select a gender. Anyway, please try again.
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Nov 16, 2022 21:28
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tiaz posted:It means you aren't. Did you leave any fields blank? It looks like I missed error checking if you didn't select a gender. I got the same error but when I tried to do it again it it said the name was taken. I get the same error when I try to log in though.
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Nov 16, 2022 21:53
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Woo! Been watching for this and hoping it would happen. Thanks, Tiaz! e: Dear Santer, I’m a 40-something Canadian goonette with an affinity for stars, snowflakes, and feathers. I do a lot of multimedia art with all kinds of supplies, especially acrylics and watercolours. Would love to try snacks or trinkets that are local to you. I’m not allergic to anything but I hate chocolate mixed with mint or fruit. Nuts are fine. Hey Santee, I hope you post! It’s more fun for me if I’ve got a few clues as to what you like. That said, you better like bees. Especially angry ones. Pixelante fucked around with this message at 22:32 on Nov 20, 2022 |
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Nov 16, 2022 22:14
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Ah, okay, I'm pretty sure I found the issue this time. Try again, sorry all.  Tree Bucket posted:I'm also getting the server error-->name taken problem. I'll try again later I guess? I've cleared out those of you who were stuck half-registered like that. If that happened to you, please use the registration page again and it should go through correctly. tiaz fucked around with this message at 22:27 on Nov 16, 2022 |
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Nov 16, 2022 22:21
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SAAASSSSS I'm also getting the server error-->name taken problem. I'll try again later I guess? e: oop it works now! But SASS is great. Last year I got a hand-stitched festive Vlad the Impaler decorative wall hanging!! Tree Bucket fucked around with this message at 22:28 on Nov 16, 2022 |
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Nov 16, 2022 22:24
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 e: registered and ready to ruin someone's mailbox! Poo In An Alleyway fucked around with this message at 23:04 on Nov 16, 2022 |
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Nov 16, 2022 22:28
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tiaz posted:Ah, okay, I'm pretty sure I found the issue this time. Try again, sorry all. Thank you! It worked now. Edit: oh sorry, I missed your PM. I'm guessing you don't but let me know if you still need that info.
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Nov 16, 2022 22:32
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tiaz posted:Ah, okay, I'm pretty sure I found the issue this time. Try again, sorry all. Don't you dare apologize! Your selfless service is truly appreciated. Feel free to shout degrading obscenities at any of us goons if it be your wish. We adore you. 
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Nov 16, 2022 22:53
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Is there a way we can edit the 'likes' and 'dislikes' field after registering? Currently it only allows me to edit the country I'm in and my choice to send packages to space, but i unfortunately didn't put enough info in the 'likes' category when filling it out. 'Chocolate' is not sufficient information about me, I'm a rich and nuanced not-at-all-pre-diabetic human being
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Nov 16, 2022 23:08
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gently caress yes!! 
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Nov 16, 2022 23:43
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Poo In An Alleyway posted:Is there a way we can edit the 'likes' and 'dislikes' field after registering? Currently it only allows me to edit the country I'm in and my choice to send packages to space, but i unfortunately didn't put enough info in the 'likes' category when filling it out. 'Chocolate' is not sufficient information about me, I'm a rich and nuanced not-at-all-pre-diabetic human being Wait, the weird other fields actually do something? I just threw nonsense in there.
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Nov 17, 2022 00:26
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YAY! Let's do this again. Hello, Santa I am now 35 years old and this hurts, as you know. I like obscure history, trinkets from far off lands, weird hats and random nerd stuff. I also hike often. Santee: I will scour the wastes for precious treasures. Holy Relics of an ancient Church, cool rocks from a local mine, a replica Abe Lincoln hat, something from Santa Claus, Indiana. All (or none) of this can be yours. We also have coal, but nobody wants that. Grammarchist fucked around with this message at 01:06 on Nov 17, 2022 |
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Nov 17, 2022 00:45
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Forgot I could just do what Grammarchist did instead of editing the form - female, 35 - Size large in shirts cuz I'm rotund, might be best not to send clothes but if you're insistent I do like funny socks - husband and I bought our own apartment this year, so if you wanna send cool wall-art or paintings or anything of the like we are looking for cool poo poo to decorate with - I like chocolate, goopy body horror movies, the Alien franchise, Red Letter Media, Animal Crossing, cooking, filmmaking, Star Trek (not the recent incarnations, the good ol' OG stuff), synthwave and 80's music. I also love obscure and bad movies so if you've got good ones I'm open to a thumbdrive of garbage - stuff that's local to you is my favourite poo poo - I have a Switch and a PC and Steam account but I mostly play Risk of Rain 2 and Stray on the PC and Animal Crossing and Breath of the Wild on my Switch Santee: - I will mail you some lovely heartwarming Irish stuff (and bees! BEEEEEEEEEES!!!!)
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Nov 17, 2022 01:00
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Hello santa. I am a skinny late 30s goon. I like the same stuff I did when I was 8: dinosaurs, astronomy, history, painting, drawing, and whatever wildlife you've got. Handmade things and boring everyday things from other parts of the world are happily accepted. Just nothing too NSFW as my kids watch the mailbox like hawks this time of year. No to alcohol but yes to other mouth-hole things. Hello santee. I apologise in advance for the horrible delay you're going to suffer through, while our postal service dudes battle through swarms of crocodiles, mosquitoes, drop-bears, spiders, emus, etc etc. Tree Bucket fucked around with this message at 07:49 on Nov 22, 2022 |
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Nov 17, 2022 01:26
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reposting from previous year with updates Santa: late 40s  ladygoon living with my goon partner. I'd love to get most anything really. Handmade at any skill level is a-ok too. I'm a librarian into board/video games, kitsch, crafts (beading and cross stitch in particular but open to all). I'd love something regional. Food/drinks - a cider-loving vegetarian. My partner is really into tea and miniatures. NSFW is fine, my mail carrier thinks I'm weird anyway.Edited to add: not a fan of mustard, pickles, or black licorice. I also have a special request for my Santa, if you're a non-US goon, my teenage niece is an obsessed Swiftie. if you come across something in your area handmade or unique to your country that is Taylor Swift related, and within your budget that would help me cement my coolest aunt ever status  if not, no worries whatsoever! I know I will love whatever you send  Santee: I sense bees and  Sadly I discovered last year alcohol-based hand sanitizer can't be shipped outside the continental U.S. 
nashona fucked around with this message at 19:42 on Nov 24, 2022 |
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Nov 17, 2022 02:00
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LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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Nov 17, 2022 02:19
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Yay I remembered SASS! The best time of year!  Dear Santa, If you search the forums here, you'll find a bunch of posts over in the SAS subforum because I'm the one who creates all of the "game day threads" for the entire MLB group over there. It's fun. I like puns and also making silly low quality "memes" about baseball teams. My favorite team is the Chicago Cubs.  I also am a 34 year old ladygoon who just got into an office career after spending 12 years cleaning hospital rooms. It's nice. I have a desk and everything. I also have a very old cat named Miley. We both like napping, so we're very similar in that regards. I am a huge Nintendo fan, with Kirby being my favorite overall character, and pikachu being my favorite pokemon. Pink is also one of my favorite colors. I just like cute things in general (especially cats). I don't get to travel much anymore, so local items from your area would be really cool! I don't have any allergies, but I hate pickles. I got tricked into drinking one of those "pickleback shots" on halloween, and I almost immediately threw up. It tastes even worse than Malort, and I've drank plenty of that over the years. Dear Snattee, You will be gifted at least one (1) bee. You have been warned.
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Nov 17, 2022 03:17
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I suppose I should also do this: Dearest Santa, I'm a 35 year old ladygoon living with my goon husband, our potentially future goon toddler, and our goon free cat. I have an office job although I'm wfh most of the time. If you search my posts you can see what I've put in prior years which is probably all still true. The one thing I'd say is no clothes and no alcohol please. (If you really want to send like a hat or scarf or something go hog wild, mostly just I'd prefer no shirts.) I don't mind alcohol usually but I can't drink right now so it would go to my husband Dear Santee, Bees. Malort. Bees with malort on their wings so when they buzz they spray malort on you. Emily Spinach fucked around with this message at 14:22 on Nov 17, 2022 |
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Nov 17, 2022 04:37
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 (I still don't remember who this goon is or why I made this, but it's still a favorite of mine) Oh yeah, I'm in! Santee: You will get.... something. Santa: I'm a middle aged married goon with three kids and three dogs. I like fun handmade things, and things from your local area are always neat!
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Nov 17, 2022 05:51
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I AM READY. Hi Santa! I'm a rapidly aging married ladygoon with two goons in training, two indoor cats, two outdoor cats that belong to my jerk neighbor who doesn't feed them, a snake, and some squirrels and raccoons that live in my backyard that don't know they're my pets, but they ARE. I would love anything interesting from your home area, but if you need more help, some things that make me happy are (in no particular order): Beetlejuice, Goonies, Pearl Jam, What We Do in the Shadows, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and Disneyana. I spend a fair amount of my free time knitting, crocheting, and doing cross stitch. Favorite colors are red, black, and rose gold. Santee, Get your epipen ready. Bees are coming.
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Nov 17, 2022 14:09
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Year #who keeps count. Hooray it's back! 30s-esque lady goon, with two cats and I'm always happy with local stuff from Santa's neck of the woods, about my only request is you send a magnet from there. Other than that, I have dull homebody hobbies (knitting/cross stitch/running/amateur entomology). Santee! Related to my knitting, you're sure to get at least a hat! I've already got a couple little local goodies set aside, and a perfect bee! I bet you can't wait, whoever you're gonna be! LadyPictureShow fucked around with this message at 00:07 on Dec 2, 2022 |
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Nov 17, 2022 15:05
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hell yes. you're getting a goatse mug.
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Nov 17, 2022 16:43
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drat, I was afraid this wasn’t happening this year. I apologize for my lack of faith, tiaz. Now, let’s release the bees! E: Dear Santa, I’m an early 40s lady goon who would love to receive stuff uniquely local to you, or whatever handmade curiosities you can conjure up. Or you can just send random fun stuff; I’m not a picky Santee. Food and booze is fine, but I’m allergic to a lot of artificial scent chemicals, so please no scented candles or body products—I’ll just have to give them away because they’ll make me feel sick/hurt my delicate meat-flesh. Dear Santee:  Ars Arcanum fucked around with this message at 19:16 on Nov 17, 2022 |
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Nov 17, 2022 17:53
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Santa: I’m a 37 year old male goon with a penchant for Pulitzer fiction, cartography, tasty snacks, space/science, alternative music and art history. I have two small kids, 2 cute rabbits and an unquenchable thirst for craft beer and single malt whisky. Strongly dislike cherries, Mumford&Sons, and right-wing politics. Santee: I’ll try my best. Probably.
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Nov 17, 2022 18:38
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Hooray, a reason to find my Christmas cheer! This was awesome last year and I can't wait to take part and see what people send in TYOOL 2022  Dearest Snatter, This is only my second ever SASS, despite my semi-aged regdate. I don't know why, because love connecting with people! I live with my partner, our needy cat Wednesday, and Maxolotl the axolotl. I have an anthropology degree and adore learning about different places and people. I collect taxidermy, have a bunch of tattoos, like eating good food/drinking good drinks and enjoy live music and festivals. I also enjoy travel and am visiting Napoli in February! I usually take an L in mens/unisex shirts, if that was an option on your mind. I am trying to get better at gardening next year after the weather being against me this growing season. My favourite colours are purple/blue/pink/black/teal... I think that's enough about me. Send me anything, really! A local something is always appreciated, especially if it's consumable. But really, I just love giving and receiving prezzies. Love and solidarity, Bollock Monkey aged 31 ¾
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Nov 17, 2022 20:27
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Yay SASS! This may be my....14th year doing this? Definitely worth coming out of hibernation for. It's been a shitshow of a year but I'm excited for SASS! Dear Santa, I'm a 37yo ladygoon with a husband and 2 cats (will post/send cat pictures on request). I work in science (genetics/DNA specifically) which I love and I also love galaxies and space. I am a ttrpg and general boardgame Nerd. I always enjoy getting things/food from where you're from. I don't have allergies and I'm not picky. I'd be happy to answer any other questions! Dear Santee, I'll try to include some stuff you request but I always also like to include stuff from where I'm from and will try to also include a handmade something. Just don't shake the box too hard, you'll just make them angry.
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Nov 17, 2022 20:39
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Emily Spinach posted:
What are the chances of two Santees getting the same gift? 
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Nov 17, 2022 22:26
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Hooray! I’m in! Joy! I like digital gift cards! Like Google Play, Steam and Amazon! I like coffee, beef jerky(especially Big John’s), gummy candies, and I’ll edit once I remember more! Amazon Wishlist is here: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/8PMBVDK031M5?ref_=wl_share Pleiades fucked around with this message at 08:19 on Dec 4, 2022 |
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Nov 18, 2022 00:21
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Nov 18, 2022 01:20
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I love you all and can't wait...so excited. 39 yo male goon Edit: my loving dog passed away since posting this. This is going to be a rough Christmas. OB-GYN Kenobi fucked around with this message at 01:31 on Nov 26, 2022 |
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Nov 18, 2022 03:26
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DEAR SANTA, I have been a very good primate this year. It has been a bad year for a lot of things though, let me only say that feline cancer loving sucks. NOW I would like to be rewarded for being a good primate. Since you cannot make feline cancer disappear, I would like some nice things. Like more facemasks, or if you really want to help my health since my customers and coworkers suck, something like an envo mask would be great! Or just some awesome cat/snake/fish/hedgehog things because I have all those pets and love them all. I play a lot of Pokemon Go, some Overwatch and Apex, otherwise I am not a gamer goon. If gift cards are your thing cause the elves unionized, Google Play or Amazon are great. Love, CW Dear Santee, if you do not post in this thread, I will consider you not a challenge but a loser and I will send you a box of mixed stuff. Love, Vengeful Wires aka Cowslips Warren UPDATE: https://gofund.me/866b0c75 dear Santa, I have many things, but this goon will be stuck in the hospital over the holiday, so if you'd like to send her a donation instead, that will warm the cold cockles of my heart. Cowslips Warren fucked around with this message at 20:56 on Nov 26, 2022 |
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Nov 18, 2022 04:13
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It won't let me log in and I already ordered presents for someone.
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Nov 18, 2022 16:33
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Hey, Goon Santa. Just recently-turned 40 y/o dude, I enjoy some video games, local treats and booze, handmade items, or just whatever random thing you like that you might want someone else to like too! I'm easy to shop for! Santee: If past years are any indication, you'll get quite the assortment of local Vermont goodies. Cheeses, meats, snacks, whatever might fit your dietary needs. I always tend to include maple syrup, and for the first time ever, it's homemade! I taped my own big-rear end maple tree last spring and boiled that loving sap for hours to get some bottles of the localiest syrup I could possibly have, and I've got some left and it's coming to you! No need for me to ship bees, this stuff is sweet enough to attract them on its own. DrBouvenstein fucked around with this message at 20:37 on Nov 22, 2022 |
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Nov 18, 2022 17:58
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