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Literally A Person
May 17, 2017
No, I won't tell you what's in it. Yes, you have to. Sit down and eat the pie. Stop crying. You're not allowed to cry while you eat the pie

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Cabbages and Kings
Aug 25, 2004


Shall we be trotting home again?
how do i know if the ingredients are ethical

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

Cabbages and Kings posted:

how do i know if the ingredients are ethical

They are not.

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

who are you to decide what is ethical and whats not?

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

numberoneposter posted:

who are you to decide what is ethical and whats not?

I am the arbiter. The decider. It is I who decides what is and is not ethical.

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017
Duh, bro.

Hollismason
Jun 30, 2007

My reluctance to enjoy clown-based movies indicates to my friends that perhaps I hold a sinister clown-based secret...


I'mma gently caress it

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

Hollismason posted:

I'mma gently caress it

It's your dessert. I just expect a clean plate.

Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
No thanks op

Baxter
Sep 13, 2000
You had me at pie.

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

is it a sweet or savory pie?

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

Nooner posted:

No thanks op

I said sit, you flamingo son-of-a-bitch.


numberoneposter posted:

is it a sweet or savory pie?

Bittersweet.

Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
OP is my cherry pie but not sexy like the warrant song, more like one of those lovely off brand fruit pies that they sell for $.33 by the cash register at the lovely market you don't like going to because all the produce sucks and the bread somehow always goes moldy after 2 days even though the use-by date is still a week and a half away, but it's close to your house so you go anyway

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

Nooner posted:

OP is my cherry pie but not sexy like the warrant song, more like one of those lovely off brand fruit pies that they sell for $.33 by the cash register at the lovely market you don't like going to because all the produce sucks and the bread somehow always goes moldy after 2 days even though the use-by date is still a week and a half away, but it's close to your house so you go anyway

It's because the mold spores are already present in the store, Nooner. That is why the bread moids.

Now, back to the pie...

Hollismason
Jun 30, 2007

My reluctance to enjoy clown-based movies indicates to my friends that perhaps I hold a sinister clown-based secret...


Literally A Person posted:

It's your dessert. I just expect a clean plate.

Not gonna eat it after I gently caress it

DeadFatDuckFat
Oct 29, 2012

This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.


Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

Hollismason posted:

Not gonna eat it after I gently caress it

Extremely rude. You're a bad guest and a bad friend. Now you can't have any pie at all.

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

YASSSS

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017
Really want that as my gangtag

Smugworth
Apr 18, 2003

BINFORD! BINFORD!
I can't shut the fuck up about BINFORD TOOLS!
I don't like pie
Unless it's poontang pie :twisted:

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD
If is doing a lot of work in this thread. OP why don't you tell everyone exactly how many pies you've made for people over the years.

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

Smugworth posted:

I don't like pie
Unless it's poontang pie :twisted:

That's gross. You're gross.

Funky See Funky Do posted:

If is doing a lot of work in this thread. OP why don't you tell everyone exactly how many pies you've made for people over the years.

A veritable shitload. Please do not associate the word "shitload" with the pie you will be eating.

satanic splash-back
Jan 28, 2009

Pie? Or pie not?

The Voice of Labor
Apr 8, 2020

Literally A Person posted:

Extremely rude. You're a bad guest and a bad friend. Now you can't have any pie at all.

you are rewarding them for being and extremely rude bad guest friend

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

satanic splash-back posted:

Pie? Or pie not?

Esta pie.

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

The Voice of Labor posted:

you are rewarding them for being and extremely rude bad guest friend

Now you have to eat twice as much pie. There.

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD

Literally A Person posted:

A veritable shitload. Please do not associate the word "shitload" with the pie you will be eating.

I didn't want it to come to this but I have to call you out. I won't mince words. I think you're lying. About the pies. About the person. About the whole thing.

So yeah if you make me a pie, I'll eat it, but you're never making that pie.

Revins
Nov 2, 2007





tune the FM in to static and pretend that its the sea
I need to watch you cut a random slice and take a big bite first :colbert:

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

Revins posted:

I need to watch you cut a random slice and take a big bite first :colbert:

:whitewater:

Funky See Funky Do posted:

I didn't want it to come to this but I have to call you out. I won't mince words. I think you're lying. About the pies. About the person. About the whole thing.

So yeah if you make me a pie, I'll eat it, but you're never making that pie.

Putting on my chef's toque right now. Tying up my apron.

ManBoyChef
Aug 1, 2019

Deadbeat Dad


I would like a pie that has the largest carbon footprint as possible. If you could mabye pay for the pie in bitcoin....if you are going to preheat your oven, maybe preheat it five to seven weeks ahead of time. Definitely make sure you source the fruits from as far away as possible. I definitely want the most bleached sugar you can give me. Something that I might need a shot of insulin just to handle.

Secondly: can I have human milk with it?

Katamari Democracy
Jan 18, 2010

Guess what! :love:
Guess what this is? :love:
A Post, Just for you! :love:
Wedge Regret
Depends on the pie.

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD

Literally A Person posted:

:whitewater:

Putting on my chef's toque right now. Tying up my apron.

Translation: Getting in my car right now. Heading to the pie shop.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015

I don't get no respect!
Clam pie! :backtowork:

Literally A Person
May 17, 2017

Funky See Funky Do posted:

Translation: Getting in my car right now. Heading to the pie shop.

Pie shop? It isn't 1890, gramps.


Deeeelish!!

Animal-Mother
Feb 14, 2012

RABBIT RABBIT
RABBIT RABBIT
voted 3.14159265359

Hollismason
Jun 30, 2007

My reluctance to enjoy clown-based movies indicates to my friends that perhaps I hold a sinister clown-based secret...


Pecan Pie is the best pie.

Slugworth
Feb 18, 2001

If two grown men can't make a pervert happy for a few minutes in order to watch a film about zombies, then maybe we should all just move to Iran!

ManBoyChef posted:

I would like a pie that has the largest carbon footprint as possible. If you could mabye pay for the pie in bitcoin....if you are going to preheat your oven, maybe preheat it five to seven weeks ahead of time. Definitely make sure you source the fruits from as far away as possible. I definitely want the most bleached sugar you can give me. Something that I might need a shot of insulin just to handle.
It's gotta have palm oil in it then. Not like, used in the recipe, I mean in it. Like, the filling. Just palm oil sloshing around inside that pie crust.

FutonForensic
Nov 11, 2012

I'm not eating the loving pie

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER
i'll slam that pie in a wealthy dowager's face op. why she never

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mom and dad fight a lot
Sep 21, 2006

The number of characters in this sentence turns out to be sixty-nine.



Funky See Funky Do posted:

So yeah if you make me a pie, I'll eat it, but you're never making that pie.

Ye of little faith. OP's mom was known for her pie.

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