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Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



A nasty woman, I think you should try is, Jess.


in

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Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



A nasty woman, I think you should try is, Jess.


The Dance Boss of Disco City
450 words

The sounds of DJs beckoning the listener to a Space Jam carried over the cracking dawn, Disco City came alive at first light. The last settlement on the coast, it was a beacon to refugees from across the continent. Gancho had come looking for work, having heard that his particular skills would be in demand. From his window he peered outside the city walls, a five-armed Dance Lord hovered in the distance, silently searching for those to judge.

Legends say that in the beginning of the Dancepocalypse, the air sang so many songs you never heard the same one twice. Dance wars and technological attrition reduced the song count to just seventeen, looping ad infinitum, every beat seared into the survivors’ memories. Gancho got some chow at the saloon, a silver coin loosened the bartender’s tongue. “If you are looking for that work, Doc Mopper is the only game in town.” Gancho nodded and tossed him a second coin as he left.

That night, Gancho found a roof with a good vantage point and waited. Soon enough, there was commotion in Doc Mopper’s district. A woman screamed at the mansion for him to show himself, but so far only two armed guards humored her. The woman pulled her staff out and slammed it into the ground, now this was getting interesting.

“I, Bailey Fontane, challenge Doc Mopper in the battlefield of dance!” Custom dictated you could never refuse a challenge, you’d be branded a coward. If a Dance Lord was nearby, you’d automatically be judged a loser and abducted. Since the Dance Lord was still outside the city, Doc Mopper could just have the goons make her disappear. They approached Bailey, sharpened staff ends raised.

Bailey thought fast and began snapping her fingers in time. The guards froze. The beat was enough, the Dance Lord had sensed it and zoomed over, glowing yellow with anticipation.

Doc Mopper snarled, “You gutless cowards!” and pushed through them. He towered over Bailey and gripped a golden staff, already swaying to a beat. Bailey continued defiantly, prancing her moves. Mopper spun his golden staff then twisted the ends, suddenly a mop head popped out. It was a secret partner! Suddenly the battle was doubles, and Bailey was dancing solo. Instant loss.

The Dance Lord flashed red and swooped in, its shimmer beam stuck Bailey, pulling her inside the craft as she screamed. It pulsed blue and white lights then swooped away. No one knew where they went, nor what they did with the losers.

Gancho inhaled sharply. Now that he knew Mopper’s trick, he’d have to find a way to defeat it. Until then, Doc Mopper was still the dance boss of Disco City.

Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



A nasty woman, I think you should try is, Jess.


In

Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



A nasty woman, I think you should try is, Jess.


Runt Ball
1499 words


“Those guards have been playing catch for six hours now!” Anders complained.

James Spaceman smirked as he adjusted a connector on his suit. “It is keeping them from doing patrols, otherwise we wouldn’t have gotten so close to the treasure cave.”

“I guess. The faster we can get the power cells back and get off of this rock, the better.”

“What’s the matter, Anders?” Talamar scoffed. “Those ugly things giving you nightmares? When I commanded the legions on the Blood Plains…”

“Monster-faced goblin guards I can handle. The problem with this dimension is the beer sucks!” Talamar and James laughed as Anders kept complaining. “I’m nursing a mega hangover from whatever that fire ale Sam and I drunk was, everything is out of focus and screaming.”

“Something is screaming,” James said. “I hear it too.”

“Friends!” broadcast 54Rah, “I have analyzed the sound patterns in the vicinity. The screams are coming from the ball!”

“Screaming balls? This place feels more like home every minute,” Talamar grinned.

“Quiet, that’s not a ball!” James pointed. It had been dropped by the big guard near the stump that functioned as an entry checkpoint. The ball quivered as its arms tried to pull it towards a bush. Another of the guards ran to scoop it up and the game continued. “It’s a tiny goblin!”

“A child?” asked Talamar.

“Negative,” broadcast 54Rah, “looks like a small adult, perhaps a teen. No clan paint. The game is called runt ball.”

An argument broke out on the field and soon two of the guards were viciously fighting as the others cheered. The ball was forgotten as the focus switched, James didn’t even notice it slipping closer to their group until the ball was right upon them. He nudged Talamar, who lifted the creature up.

“Hello, ball!”

James put his hand over the ball goblin’s mouth to keep it from screaming. “Hey, hey, calm down. We aren’t going to hurt you, just keep quiet!” The goblin stared at him for a second through teary eyes, then nodded. James withdrew his hand from its mouth.

“Who are you? Do you need any help?”

The goblin’s eyes widened. “Help? No, no help! Marbles is okay, Marbles is used to being runt ball. Marbles is always runt.”

“Your used to those idiots kicking you around?” Anders asked.

“Marbles is always thrown around! Marbles is runt, bigger goblins always hurt Marbles! But Marbles is okay, goblins heal real good!” Marbles held up his left arm and swung it. “No more brokens!”

“Of all the bad places to have our gear stolen…” Anders complained. James gave him a signal to be quiet.

“Marbles. How would you like to not be the weak goblin for once?” Marbles gave him a curious look.

***

That night the whole group was ready to steal their gear back. 54Rah arrived with Cavewoman Sam, finally awake from her hangover. Talamar and Anders stood watch, and James Spaceman held out a glove for Marbles.

“This is a Power Glove. With it you will be able to punch very hard.” The goblin took the glove in his tiny hands, staring at it in awe. “I’ve adjusted the feedback so you won’t break your arm each time you punch, but it might sting a bit the first few times.”

“This…this is the best gift Marbles has ever gotten! Marbles always wanted friends!” Marbles was crying. 54Rah was leaking wiper fluid. Even Anders was crying.
“It’s just a dusty night,” he said.

“Okay, Marbles, go up to the checkpoint and just start punching everyone who was mean to you. We will sneak in and get back our equipment this clan stole from us.”

“Marbles is ready to punch! Punch for friends!” The little goblins strolled into the night.

“You think this guy isn’t going to just become a clan tyrant himself?” asked Talamar. “It’s what I would do. It’s what I used to do!”

“I think he’ll be okay,” James replied. “And the battery will run out after a few dozen punches. No new warlords here.”

“We should have went in during the fight!” Anders complained. “You just gave away the only other chance to get home.”

“It wasn’t dark yet, and the fight was right in front of the entryway!” James countered. “And that battery barely powers a flashlight. Now let’s get ready, the chaos will begin soon.”

Just as he spoke a goblin guard flew past them, a fist-sized dent in its chest. The guard crashed into the wall near the entrance. Suddenly the post was alive with shouts and screams.

“Go go go!” James yelled.

“I think he means we should go!” Anders quipped. James would have zapped him if Anders wasn’t also running while he talked.

“Sam SMASH!” Cavewoman Sam swung her club at the iron door and it shattered off its hinges. “Ha!”

“The door was already open, Sam!” Talamar sighed.

“Now door more open!”

“Everyone find the missing items, priority is the power cells,” James started tossing around piles of coins, jewels, and odd statues. Soon Sam had found her other club, Anders his lucky jeweled stein, and 54Rah her cool sunglasses. But no power cells!

“They have to be here somewhere!” James exclaimed.

“Oh they are here, human. We traded for them fair and square!” In walked in Goblin King Whammy and twenty goblin guards. Two held Marbles, who was punching ineffectively at them with his now depowered Power Glove. They tossed him at James.

“What do you mean, traded?” James asked as he helped Marbles to his feet.

“Ask the Strong One!” King Whammy replied. The team looked at Cavewoman Sam, who stared back with a confused expression.
“He means me!” Talamar said.

“Oooh, right, Talamar the Strong!” James said.

“More like Talamar the Jerk!” Anders added.

“Of course I traded them, you do-gooding dullards!” Talamar laughed. “I have worlds to conquer, and while being friends has been different, you just get in the way, stopping my destiny! King Whammy will let me lead his armies to conquer other realms, I’ll be able to command and plunder again. I think I’ll burn Anders’s planet to a cinder first, just for fun! As for you all… you will be dead!”

James and the team braced, but nothing happened. Talamar looked at the Goblin guards. “Kill them, you idiots!” The guards looked at King Whammy, who nodded, then they charged.

A barrage of lasers blasting from 54Rah forced them back, the goblins laughing as they withdrew. “My stun rays only tickle them, someone figure out a way to stop them!” she yelled.

“Anders, get the power cells from the King. Marbles and I will cover you. 54Rah, keep firing. And Cavewoman Sam…you know what to do!” Sam grinned and suddenly her twin clubs were like helicopter blades, sending goblins flying left and right.

“Me good but not this good, is too many!” Cavewoman Sam yelled, still smashing every goblin foolish enough to get near her.

“Marbles’s glove is broken, Marbles can’t help you!” Marbles said.

“Just stick with me, kid, I got a plan. Spaceman Shield!” A barrier appeared around James and Marbles, when goblin guards tried to touch it they were shocked and writhed in pain.

Anders threw his lucky stein at the King’s head, it hit with a crunch, and the king dropped the power cells in pain. Anders rolled beneath the King and scooped them up, running back to James as Sam swung two clubs to the face of a guard who got too close.

James dropped his shield and grabbed the power cells. He plugged one into Marbles’s glove. “It should work for years now, punch away!” Marbles did, and goblins screamed.

The other power cells James plugged into the Transpo Device and activated it. A reddish portal to another realm appeared.

“Let’s go, team!” James yelled. “Marbles,it looks like we got you into big trouble. You can stay or come with us, but you might never return here.”

Marbles stopped punching and looked at James, tears in his eyes. “Marbles just wants to go with friends. Marbles never had friends before.”

James smiled. “Get him in the portal!” he told 54Rah, who scooped Marbles up in her robot arms and flew into the portal.

“No!” yelled Talamar, but he was using a goblin as a shield dodging Cavewoman Sam’s blows.

“You’re off the team, Talamar!” Anders laughed, jumping into the portal. He remembered too late he forgot his lucky stein. Cavewoman Sam smashed one last goblin and jumped in.

James Spaceman glared at Talamar. “We better not see you again!” James jumped in and the portal closed. Talamar fell to the floor. King Whammy stomped over.

“You better have a good reason why I shouldn’t murder you right here!” the King roared. Talamar stared at the floor, then suddenly grinned. He picked up the lucky jeweled stein. Inside was one last power cell. Talamar held it and grinned an evil grin as its glow lit the treasure cavern.

Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



A nasty woman, I think you should try is, Jess.


In, number me please

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Tars Tarkas
Apr 13, 2003

Rock the Mok



A nasty woman, I think you should try is, Jess.


quote:

Week 94 - TRULY ALIEN
Extreme Flash rule: set in the 1880s

Unchee
1106 words

Unchee smeared the molasses across its greebs. “Faa Spree Glip! Unchee Faa Spree Glip!”

“I think it’s working!” said Arthur.

Clarkson stared at the creature from behind the counter. “It better be working, that thing is making a mess in my store!”

“We will be done soon, Unchee just needs some help to speak to his family. He’s going to make a telegraph!” Arthur had found Unchee hiding in their shed two days ago, and instantly bonded with the creature. Naming it for one of the sounds it kept making, Arthur believed he had made great strides communicating with his new friend. “Unchee keeps pointing to the stars, he must be an angel fallen from Heaven!”

Clarkson rolled his eyes. “You might have the fallen angel part right, kid. Just don’t let Sheriff Raines see him, or we will find out if angels can dance at the end of a rope.”

Arthur smiled, not understanding the threat. Unchee waved its four arms in circles, then began gathering items from the general store. Six pieces of wood. Some rope. A box of horseshoe nails. A can of green paint. The paint seemed to especially excite the creature, it grasped it with all four arms and vibrated while humming, the greebs wagging excitedly back and forth.

“I’ll just charge all this to your Pa’s account,” Clarkson said. Arthur just nodded, Clarkson wondered if James would even notice what his son had done. The man had spent the past few years feuding with Bosco’s ranch, and was now a regular in Raines’s drunk tank.

***

It was a ten mile ride back to the farm, Unchee sat next to Arthur in the wagon’s coach box. The creature gripped the seat with two arms and the other two were repeating a pattern of opening wide and closing. “Golly, Unchee, I hope all this equipment lets you talk to the stars!” Arthur said. “Maybe I can talk to Mom again!” The supplies rattled in the back, in addition to the general store haul there was a long metal rod that Arthur had the town’s blacksmith make.

Suddenly Unchee flailed its four arms and pointed them all the same direction, towards a large rock formation. “Faa Spree Glip! Unchee Faa Spree Glip!!” it yelled.

“What is it, Unchee? You want to go to the rocks? Is that where you can use these supplies to talk to home?” Arthur lead the horses where Unchee was pointing. It was Lone Coyote Ridge, one of several places the Clayton gang used as a hideout years ago. Now it was just a place younger Arthur would play when he escaped chores for the day. Unchee’s vibrations and squeals became more intense the closer they road to the rocks, the creature practically glided up the formation with the materials Arthur procured for it floating behind it.

Over the next three hours Unchee was a maniac in moving the supplies and rocks around, methodically arranging them and then angrily rearranging them. Finally a squeal of satisfaction and the green paint was splattered all over. Some of the splashes looked to Arthur like symbols, but most was just tossed in no discernible pattern.

The creature finished and stood near the center, raised its four arms and began chanting “Wawi Faa Spree Glip! Unchee Wawi Faa Spree Glip!”

Arthur watched expecting something to happen, but after ten minutes he began to grow impatient. Maybe the heavens weren’t responding because there were no clouds in the sky. He tried to explain that to Unchee, but the creature ignored him. It was too absorbed in the chanting, like stuck in a trance. Arthur sighed. This was no fun. At least the sun was setting soon and the stars would be out, maybe the magic would work then

“What is all this?” came a voice behind him. A voice Arthur knew too well. He stood up.

“Beatrice Bosco!”

“I know my own name, loser!” Beatrice stepped forward. “Look at this gross thing, and what is this mess?”

Arthur panicked. This spoiled brat was going to ruin everything! “He’s my friend, Beatrice! Now get away from him!”

“I don’t want your creepy star animal!” Beatrice scoffed. “I have my own, and he’s better!”

From behind her stepped another Unchee. Thinner, with stylized hair, but the same four-armed body style and sweet smiling expression. Arthur hadn’t noticed Unchee at his side until the creature growled, then began yelling “Faa Spree Maal! Faa Spree Maal!”

The new Unchee began hissing and pointed three arms at Unchee, and yelled back “Faa Spree Kii! Faa Spree Kii!” The two creatures circled each other while hurling chants and hisses back and forth. Beatrice clapped with delight.

The two Unchee pulled back from each other and renewed chanting, suddenly Unchee had green sparks emanating from his greebs. The second Unchee also had sparks, these were blue. Arthur was in shock, but as he stared ahead his eyes focused on something on the next rock formation over. It was another array of random junk with a metal rod sticking out, but with blue paint splattered everywhere.

“This town ain’t big enough for two colors!” Beatrice crowded Arthur and pointed at his chest. “You are trash to be swept aside, just like your old man!”

It took all of Arthur’s strength not to deck her right there, not only would it be bad to hit a girl, he’d be ensuring that her family’s ranch would crush his family for good. Instead he focused on the two creatures, their colored energies had become more chaotic. He saw green and blue energy ripping holes in the sky. Out slithered tendrils of power that crackled and swayed. A line of blue crashed into a boulder and it shattered into pebbles. Green hit the ground and there was a crash, Arthur stumbled to the ground. He was running before he had even pushed himself off the ground.

As Arthur ran, the creatures began to float, still shrieking their chants at each other. He turned at a scream and saw Beatrice was being electrocuted by a blue energy. She began to float as well, chanting the same chant as her Unchee. “Wawi Faa Spree Glip! Unchee Wawi Faa Spree Glip!” Arthur kept running, dodging to the left to avoid a snake of green energy. He avoided it, or so he thought.

“Faa Spree Maal! Faa Spree Glip! Unchee Faa Spree Glip!” Arthur chanted. The energies flowed, the power grew. Clarkson came out of his store to see what the racket outside of town was. The aquamarine flames engulfed him and the town. They continued across half the territory.

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