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syzpid posted:It is the most Tank thing to come up just short I think so.
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Jun 24, 2023 23:41
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Mr. Nice! posted:I think so. Following through leads to the paradox where the runner up is the most Tank like.
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Jun 25, 2023 01:12
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Exactly. "Derrick Lewis should win the Tank Abbout tournament because coming second is the most Tank Abbot thing" - A statement dreamed up by the utterly deranged. Big Lewis has played you for absolute fools.
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Jun 25, 2023 01:15
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Beeswax posted:Exactly. 
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Jun 25, 2023 06:44
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Tank Abbott should not have been in this tournament. You do not make a 'which one of these fruits in most like an apple' and put an apple in the goddamn tournament. That kills the point. Voted Lewis in protest.
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Jun 25, 2023 08:01
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Tanks may win, even succeed for brief flashes, but defend a title? Tank has reigned alone since the dawn of Tankian Era. His dethroning is a mercy, so that he may rediscover his cantankerous roots.
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Jun 25, 2023 08:21
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ChrisBTY posted:Tank Abbott should not have been in this tournament. It wouldn't be a proper mythological examination of a legacy of violence and failure if it didn't include an overarching theme of a father being consumed by his sons. In terms of the morality conversation: Lewis is almost objectively a better human being than Tank, but I'm not sure Tank Abbott or his archetype could have come into existence without being kind of a piece of poo poo. The early days of MMA did not attract kind or well-balanced people, and to stand out as an avatar of violence and anger in a crowd that included rich strangulation fetishists and literal nazis you had to be a real impressive sort of rear end in a top hat. What that is in the modern era and if that needs to be a part of it is obviously up for debate.
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Jun 25, 2023 09:32
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Are there any Tanks at the lower weight levels, or is there a certain "You Must Have This Much Mass" to properly qualify? I want to know if there's someone hanging around at Welterweight who really could cut down to like Fly but won't and insists on punching their way out of every problem. Would Conor count as a Tank if he ate another Conor?
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Jun 25, 2023 15:40
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C. Everett Koop posted:Are there any Tanks at the lower weight levels, or is there a certain "You Must Have This Much Mass" to properly qualify? Jon Lineker has shown some mind boggling punching power. His inability to make weight (even if he could carry the power to 135) is a less romantic standout flaw, but he’s certainly made a lot out of his one skill.
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Jun 25, 2023 17:22
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C. Everett Koop posted:Are there any Tanks at the lower weight levels, or is there a certain "You Must Have This Much Mass" to properly qualify? I want to know if there's someone hanging around at Welterweight who really could cut down to like Fly but won't and insists on punching their way out of every problem. First person that comes to mind Kelvin Gastelum. He loves cheeseburgers too much to be a welterweight, he is really good at punching and being tough as hell, and he loses to the most talented guys.
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Jun 25, 2023 19:07
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C. Everett Koop posted:Are there any Tanks at the lower weight levels, or is there a certain "You Must Have This Much Mass" to properly qualify? I want to know if there's someone hanging around at Welterweight who really could cut down to like Fly but won't and insists on punching their way out of every problem. Krazy Horse imo
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Jun 25, 2023 20:41
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Cody garbrant
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Jun 25, 2023 22:56
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Bigg Rigg is probably the closest to welterweight Tank.
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Jun 26, 2023 03:35
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 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udQFxkFbPlQ      Thank you, everyone, for your participation in this noble enterprise. May we reconvene once more when the universe needs a new Abbott. 
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Jun 26, 2023 21:34
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Thank you for running the tournament Carl! It's been a wild ride with an unfortunate end. But Lewis is definitely the second best Tank Abbott in the world and a worthy successor to the throne.
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Jun 26, 2023 22:17
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Thank you for running this. lol.
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Jun 26, 2023 22:29
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This was super fun even without much knowledge of MMA. Very informative and entertaining and I think philosophically any deviation from Tank Abbott, whether good or bad, makes one less of a Tank Abbott. Mental schemas and whatnot. Anyways, good times, thank you Carl
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Jun 26, 2023 22:51
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Beeswax posted:Thank you for running the tournament Carl! It's been a wild ride with an unfortunate end. But Lewis is definitely the second best Tank Abbott in the world and a worthy successor to the throne. I don't think somebody can be the 'best' tank. Only the 'most' tank.
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Jun 26, 2023 22:55
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Really fun. Great write ups all around Carl. Now the question, what's the next one going to be?
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Jun 27, 2023 01:22
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This was a delightful thread and the right guy won. God bless Derrick Lewis, even if his balls are hot.
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Jun 27, 2023 02:42
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The Tank that once was is not the Tank of today. The Tank of today just stands up.
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Jun 27, 2023 05:20
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ChrisBTY posted:Tank Abbott should not have been in this tournament.
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Jun 27, 2023 15:08
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Carl you are an awesome guy for making this happen. Thread came along at a tough time, so the daily laugh was appreciated. To Beeswax and the other Tank die hards, though we disagree I very much understand where you are coming from and respect your opinions. Great posting everyone, let's do dumb poo poo more often.
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Jun 27, 2023 22:18
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Thanks Carl. To the people who crowned Lewis Tank Abbott 2.0, I'll say again, it's not the praise you think it is. It's degrading because he's so much more.
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Jun 27, 2023 22:24
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I think we all have a slightly different idea of what tank Abbott represents, and what this tournament was meant to be.
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Jun 27, 2023 23:18
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Tank Abbott right now:
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Jun 28, 2023 02:00
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Thank you for this thread
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Jun 28, 2023 18:43
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Thank you, CarlCX, from the bottom of my fists.
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Jun 28, 2023 18:45
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Thank you, everyone. I am glad you all enjoyed it, and honestly, I'm glad we wound up having enough philosophical space between opinions that people have mixed feelings about how it ended. I was worried this would all wind up being too obvious.Digital Jedi posted:Now the question, what's the next one going to be? The next one is prooobably going to be an MMA Jobber King tournament, but it's gonna be a bit because it turns out this plus weekly writeups plus monthly reports plus having a job and responsibilities is difficult. But we'll get there. We haven't seen the last of Zuluzinho.
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Jun 29, 2023 09:17
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*bob sapp curls up and hits the canvas in preparation for the jobber tourney*
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Jun 29, 2023 23:36
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I can't really think of a better jobber at a high level than bob sapp, post when he actually tried. Maybe one of those boxing journeymen who fights like 25 times a year and goes 0-25, but that's a very different scenario
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Jun 29, 2023 23:42
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Eat This Glob posted:*bob sapp curls up and hits the canvas in preparation for the jobber tourney*
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Jun 29, 2023 23:51
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Eat This Glob posted:*bob sapp curls up and hits the canvas in preparation for the jobber tourney* It'll be his to lose and Bob Sapp is very good at losing when the amount of money he gets paid doesn't hinge on winning.
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Jun 30, 2023 03:04
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We should try to name the people that'll be pulled into Carl's jobber tournament. Only one I can think of on this scale is Shannon Ritch.
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Jun 30, 2023 04:06
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Travis Fulton still excluded for being a godawful human?
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Jun 30, 2023 05:30
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Testekill posted:It'll be his to lose and Bob Sapp is very good at losing when the amount of money he gets paid doesn't hinge on winning. Not this circular argument again
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Jun 30, 2023 07:53
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what about worst jobber? rocky. rocky is here
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Jun 30, 2023 07:57
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Jay Ellis is the king of losers, in terms of sheer quantity of defeats
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Jun 30, 2023 13:44
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Kenneth Allen is the Undisputed King of MMA Jobbers, and if he loses because you guys like Bob Sapps personality or something I'm going to lose my mind.
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Jun 30, 2023 16:25
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AndyElusive posted:Kenneth Allen is the Undisputed King of MMA Jobbers, and if he loses because you guys like Bob Sapps personality or something I'm going to lose my mind. this is why democracy inevitably fails
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Jun 30, 2023 16:50
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