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Request posted:So, uh. Good news, the Very Bad Wizard left, but uh.
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Jun 6, 2023 20:03
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 "Slingbring, Snalz... Bless your hearts." He tossed both of them a shovel. "Might wanna take these. And keep yer backs straight, or yer gun' have a bad time in the mornin'." (Bury that well) 1d6=4 --- Prayer: "Gosh darnit, there's nothing but brown sludge coming from this faucet. Won't somebody do something about this?"
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Jun 6, 2023 20:19
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 "Besteria's a Union country y'know. Where everyone gets their fair shot at employment. Makes yer proud ta be Besterian, it does. Now what doesn't look as good is, when a buncha unlicensed undead scabs come 'round, not 'aving paid their dues in decades they ''avn't, and take all the decent hauntin' gigs from 'ard working skelingtons an' boogeymen an' others' wot 'ave been raised for their grimm task by a licensed necromonger. Make's a gnoll want to break a few legs it does, but ya don't 'ave any on account' o' bein host-less souls, so I 'ad to get a bit creative, see." "Besteria's not only good fer it's unions, is' also meticulously scriblious. So I wen't down ta' da Besterian Peoples Arkives and got meself a copy of the past three centuries of the Necrologies of Besteria and wouldn't ya know it, says' right 'ere where ya' lot we're buried an' all. Now I ain't got all day, but I do 'aves all night, so if you'n don't want ta get yerself exhumed ontop of bein' inhumed i suggest ye get back in yer hole or ye might find yerself missin' some of them "grave goods" if ya know what Im saying, capishe?" Wrangle Ghosts into Compliance: 1d6 1 Who knew that threatening ghosts with grave robbery could go wrong? Not this gnoll!
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Jun 6, 2023 21:42
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 Well, I see what we’ve got here is some young-uns that think they’re too fancy to stay dead. You got-dang ghosts get back in that dang-nab hole, or I’ll give ya a whipping that yer mams shoulda back when you was alive. Shame the Ghosts into behaving: 1d6 6 Boon! ----------------------------------- The circus is coming to town, but our town had a drought last year and we've not enough food to feed the circus. At this rate, they're not going to stop to set up camp...
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Jun 6, 2023 22:09
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 Not many people could do a power slide on a noble steed, but not many people were Sir Gandrazz, Knight of Style, who knew how to make an entrance. "What do we have here? A bunch of post-mortem party people! You guys don't want do be stuck here all eternity, and you're free of what used to be the Well, so let's get you to the afterlife with a bang!" The perfectly-timed pyrotechnics were the ideal punctuation for that. lay the Screaming Ghosts to rest satisfied by giving them something worth screaming about: 1d6 4 *** Where did all these chickens come from?! Make it stop!
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Jun 6, 2023 22:31
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 Upon being gifted a kid-sized shovel from Bubba, Slingbring spazzed out even more so than usual. "I'm can be helping harder!" the faerie declared, straightening their back and loading their spade into their sling, before giving it their everything and a twirl. Somehow the dangerously unbalanced aerial pirouette managed to send the tool arcing spadefirst into a mound of inverted dirt by the extruding well. It teetered to a stop after leaving a deep furrow scratched in the ground, having moved some mass a feet or two closer back to where it ought be. Excited by this bold new technique, Slingbring shrieked with glee and flew to dodge ghosts and elementals to snatch back the spade. ---- Request: Sir Verily Good Wizard, forsooth, I should quiteth like for there to beeth more windmills about for mineself to joust for giant fighting practice!
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Jun 6, 2023 22:52
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 Cedric Songcaller Cedric moves to the unfolding Well and sings a song of restful returns. A wistful ballad of better times, when the well was filled and it’s place secure. His work is filled with good will for the souls departed, deprived of their chosen afterlife. Putting the well back in the Ground: 1d6 4 - - - A small girl of the Village of Lost Capers: Good Wizard, I wish that my village has all the fish it needs to survive - we are so hungry. The Wandering Mage fucked around with this message at 19:03 on Jun 7, 2023 |
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Jun 7, 2023 00:08
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Highshooter McGavin posted:Now you lot are new, but you’ve passed the Academy, so you’ll do just fine. I don’t care where you come from or what you were before, but you’re all Troubleshooters now, so take pride in that. Your assignments are on the docket - do your best, and work with your companions, and you’ll come out of this alive.  Pollox the Hammer, Minotaur Smith Pollux sighed as he lowered his salute, dropping any pretense of rigidity in his bulk-bearing posture. He scratched at an itch at the back of his neck and glanced around at the bizarre spread of Troubleshooters in the present mix with him. "How'd I get roped into this..?" Pollux muttered to himself, and lumbered off towards the outskirts of town. "Just wanted help meeting and chatting with lasses..." The armorsmith Pollox didn't even remember signing up for The Good Wizard's errant Troubleshooter recruitment services when he'd apprenticed at the Academy's smithworks for several years to get his Runic Smithing and Enchantment credentials sorted out for his current business. Sure, there'd been the RUNIES exams and the blood in the apprenticeship signatures, and Pollux recalled he'd done fine on both scores, and yet... The burly Pollux was running late for his plans to enjoy an evening out on the town looking for romantically-available ladies when he spotted a giant puple, pink, and blue flower blooming majestically as it towered over a patch of smaller long-stemmed wildflowers covering a hill nearby the trail and was struck with an inspiration! The large bull-headed humanoid began scooping up the prettier flowers on his way up the hill to make an impromptu bouquet. "Careful, stranger," buzzed a tiny fairy that had flitted beneath Pollux's left ear, "you're treading upon Earth Elemental!" "Shoo, lil' fly!" Pollux burst, unable to parse the pipsqueaky faespeak, as he batted the tiny sprite away with his fistful of pollen-laden wildflowers. The minotaur sneezed and wiped his bovine snout on his dusty sleeve while he strode further uphill. At the hill's peak, Pollux gave the distinctively-giant flower a tug at the stem's base, but the roots were so thick that the minotaur was forced to set down his recent floral pluckings and use both his hands just to pull the giant flower up from the soil. "Shoulda brought my tinsnips today..." Pollux grunted to no one, and he readjusted his flower-yanking stance for a lower center of gravitiy in the starting squat. As the flower's roots resisted being ripped from the earth, the entire hill began to quiver, tremble, and shake with increasing orders of magnitude until suddenly something gave and there was a loud *POP* and a deafening bellow from below: quote:[[[[AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-]]]]☠️  "Did that hill just... scream and die?" Pollux heard uttered by a pair of passers-by further down the trail, and he waved at them with his colorful prize in hand. "Woah, check that guy's dag'n flower, man..." * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *     Request:Joieileena, Petal-Sprite: "Oh great and Good Wizard, I think I just witnessed an Unknown Hero defeat an Earth Mound Elemental with his bare hands! How can I help him achieve his destiny? He could not understand me when I tried to warn him away from such dangers! Anyway, keep up the ~good~ work Mr. Wizard sir, teehee! 
Lux Anima fucked around with this message at 03:13 on Jun 7, 2023 |
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Jun 7, 2023 03:09
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Help! I'm trying to collect taxes but the people refuse to give up their hard earned cash! I'm sure it's because they can't see the long-term benefits of dynamic demographics-based incremental policy shifts, please grant them some perspective!
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Jun 7, 2023 07:18
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Request: Oh no, I slept in and now I'm behind on my baking work. Oh, I wish I could move super fast and make up for lost time!
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Jun 7, 2023 07:24
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 A little club soda will settle things down here. Rebury the Well: 1d6 4
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Jun 7, 2023 16:36
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Troubleshootress was set on her path early on by her parents, her name is a bit on the nose, but she's got two lovely crossbows with very sharp tips so most people keep that to themselves. Perhaps her mind is a bit one-track too, but if you've got it, flaunt it! Squash the Elementals: 1d6 4
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Jun 7, 2023 20:33
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Oh dear. The Very Bad Wizard is at it again, mucking with powers they really shouldn't. Butting in on troubleshooter work, no less! Well, at least they weren't doing anything too Bad today, just waving a net around, trying to catch lost souls for nefarious purposes. You know, as you do. Wrangling Ghosts: 1d6 6 Oh. They actually caught one. Wasn't expecting that.
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Jun 7, 2023 20:59
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The Late Johnson, with his signature red cloak and concealed face arrives on the scene just in time for most of the work to be done! He tosses one clod of earth onto the refilled well of souls and considers it a job well done. 1d6 = 4 Prayer Aw geez I forgot my lunch on the way to my workplace! And the nearest bakery was closed today! I could really use a replacement for my 'Everything I Had In The Cupboard' Sandwich.
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Jun 7, 2023 21:23
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And so it was that The Royal Troubleshooters, renowned for their expertise in handling the most peculiar and perilous predicaments, descended upon the chaotic scene near the Mound of Screaming Souls in their Trouble Carts. The trundling, six wheeled vehicles tore across the landscape and disgorged them quickly before pulling away from the area of effect. The air crackled with an eerie energy as they surveyed the disarray caused by the unleashed forces from the former Well. With unwavering determination etched upon their faces, the Troubleshooters swiftly divided into three groups, each assigned to tackle a specific challenge that threatened the land of Berestia. The first group set out to wrangle the restless and tormenting spirits that had escaped the confines of the Well. Armed with ancient scrolls and enchanted artifacts, these brave souls embarked on their ghostly pursuit, weaving through mist-shrouded forests and desolate fields. Their task was to restore order by either coaxing the ethereal beings back into the depths of the Well or seeking a means to exorcise them from the realm. In the face of the vengeful spirits, some Troubleshooters were blessed with a positive Boon, granting them enhanced spectral abilities, while others found themselves twisted by negative spectral energy. Marked with ethereal sigils, Gruff, the Very Bad Wizard and Gregoria pacified the souls and navigated the spirit realm with ease, while the unfortunate Swancy became a conduit of unsettling forces, their presence instilling caution and uncertainty among their comrades. An unfortunately predictable state of affairs for those who would Troubleshoot! --- Meanwhile, a team of skilled Elementalists, clad in shimmering robes adorned with intricate runes, took upon themselves the daunting duty of quelling the awakened earth elementals. Masters of elemental manipulation, they harnessed their powers to combat the rampaging creatures born of the Well's curse. Their mission was to restore the balance between the living and the earth, ensuring that the unleashed forces would be brought under control and the land would cease to convulse with dangerous upheavals. As they stood before the relentless onslaught of the rampaging creatures, the bodies of the Neutral Snitchin’ Rogue and Pollox shimmered with a pulsating aura of mystical energy. Gradually, a layer of living rock materialized around them, blending seamlessly with their form. This extraordinary gift bestowed upon them by the ancient forces of the earth served as a shield, granting them enhanced resilience and protection against the elemental onslaught. --- Lastly, a group of resourceful engineers, wizards, and volunteers armed with tools and magical artifacts designed for containment, focused on resolving the pressing issue of the increasingly ascending Well. These ingenious Troubleshooters sought to unravel the perplexing mystery behind the Well's defiance of gravity. Through their expertise in ancient geothermal magic and groundbreaking engineering methods, they endeavored to re-bury the Well of Screaming Souls deep within the earth, silencing its disruptive effects and averting further catastrophe. --- After several grueling days of clean-up, the Troubleshooters managed to get things looking approximately presentable. Some ghosts had likely escaped, and the soil near the Well itself was quite treacherous, but they moved the caution signs further away and called it a day. An unqualified success! THE CHANGED posted:Those who gained a Boon gain +1 to future rolls. Those who were Twisted lose part of their roll, going from 1d6 to 1d5. Those so afflicted gain a Boon on a 5, now, and so on. Some weeks later, The Very Good Wizard performed the last of his calisthenics, listening to the music of the spheres. Wiping sweat off his brow, he stretched as his workout gear evanesced into motes of light and condensed back into his typical regalia. He peered over the edge of the Island Castle with a fond smile, then consulted his Cauldron once more. He frowned as he heard some troubling interference, then his contentment flooded back over him as an earnest plea came through loud and clear. quote:Good Wizard, I wish that my village has all the fish it needs to survive - we are so hungry. The poor innocent! Well, he certainly could help, yes he could! Hauling up his sleeves, he rubbed his hands together, feeling the power in his blood warming beneath his skin. He took a deep breath, then Cast The Spell.  Cast The Spell: 1d4 4 He fell to his knees as the power rushed out of him in a flurry of bubbles that drifted from the sky. He sat there for a moment, catching his breath, then crawled to a nearby divan. Perhaps he was overdoing it. He wasn’t a young man any longer! He snapped his fingers and snatched a fruited beverage from the ether. Time for a quick rest! -o- Highshooter McGavin paced anxiously, running his hands over perfect, frozen, golden locks. “I hope you all got some rest out there, folks, because this is another mess. A Tier 4 Environmental Twist with Metamorphological Implications And Ontological Schema Damage.”  He gestured to a stable scrying floating to his right depicting the riverside village of Grimshackle. The river had been dry in recent years, relic of a failed intervention against the Very Good Wizard, but now it surged and pulsed with unnatural vigour. “Grimshackle will be washed away unless you can help them - and that would be the least of our concerns. Consult the Assignment Board, and good luck out there. ASSIGNMENT BOARD posted:As a reminder each of you, pick a job from the board below and roll 1d6. On a 1, you’ll get Twisted. On a 6, you’ll get a Boon. Try to roll high. You, as a group, need to beat the target for each job. Complete them all, and you’ll successfully complete today’s VGW Duty. Fail, and some other stuff will happen!
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Jun 8, 2023 20:48
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 SNALZKRAK WENT HOME TO HOLE IN CAVE WALL AND BROUGHT WITH HIM ECTOGOOP FROM WELL OF SOULS TO USE AS NESTING MATERIAL FOR CONSORT WHO WANTS TO LAY EGGS. SOUL GOOP FROM WELL CUSHIONS WELL AND GLOWS PRETTY COLOR. MALE EGG LAYING DUTIES PERFORMED SUCCESSFULLY SNALZKRAK HOPES CONSORT FIR SNACK BECOME GRAVID. --------- SNALZKRAK LIKE EAT FISH LIKE OTHER KOBOLD. CONSORT WILL ALSO LIKE FISH TO EAT, GOOD PROTEIN CONTENT SAYS SHAMAN. PUNCH PISCINES: 1d6 1
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Jun 8, 2023 22:32
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 My, there were water-type anomalies afoot here, now. After the lovely chat with the restless spirits they'd taken home last time, this was certainly a change of pace. Fish falling from the skies, fish leaping out of the stream, bigger fish communicating in their own unique way! Anomalies were precious in this day and age, and this place was ripe with the newest crop of them. Joining The Royal Troubleshooters had certainly turned out a great decision for Hood to make. Hood decided to make for the big, raging river anomalies. These odd fish creatures certainly needed to be quelled a bit, but not too hard. They'd just been set off by the Very Good Wizard's kindhearted spell after all, and oh, there likely had been no tact employed at all in making first contact with them. Hood couldn't fault them a bit of raging in that case. Best see about starting a proper line of communication with these anomalies. Quelling the Raging River Monsters: 1d6 6 Hood was feeling awfully confident about this one. BraveLittleToaster fucked around with this message at 23:54 on Jun 8, 2023 |
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Jun 8, 2023 22:56
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 In Gregoria's opinion, becoming a giant beetle-person had not been a positive development. However, being a giant beetle-person with cool glowy eyes was at least a little better. Their first mission had been a success, and she'd done a pretty good job with the Well of Souls! Surely Gregoria would have her proper form restored one of these days. And now--hooray! Look at all this dirt (or dirt-adjacent stuff, depending on how one categorized sand) to move around! Flexing her top two sets of limbs, Gregoria prepared to chuck! Some! Sandbags!!! Fend Off Flooding (1d6+1): 5+1= 6
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Jun 8, 2023 23:51
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 The Neutral Snitchin' Rogue Boons: 1 An old man is standing on a pier, peering at the waters below him. He is wholly still, until a shadow larger than normal comes to his vision, lured by bait he had set under the waterline earlier. With a swift movement, a javelin is let loose, and straight through the neck of the creature. The fifth one for today. The old man sighs. At least Sneak Attack worked against fish just fine. Ruin the Raging River Monsters: 1d6+1 6 ------ Prayer: In case you're interested, the fishermen are talking about how the fishermen of the neighboring village are dumping suspect magical alchemical reagents in the river. Kind regards, Neutral Snitchin' Rogue
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Jun 9, 2023 04:26
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 Pollox the Hammer, Minotaur Smith Pollox sighed while he rubbed at his brow and checked his reflection in a still basin of water. The rockiness or whatever it was wasn't coming off his face, nor was it washing off his hands and arms... "Now I might not need goggles 'n gloves to work furnaces so much, but... hrm," he spoke to his reflection. The love-seeking Minotaur hadn't had any luck finding a feminine companion after he'd retrieved that giant flower - it had been an odd sight among the patrons of at least three bars that night, but no lady had asked for much as a sniff of the flower before moving on. Shucks. The enormous flower had withered overnight while sitting upright in Pollox's boot, too. * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * Request:Servenbeck, Nefarious Pool-Shark: "Good Wizard, I demand that my enemies miss their critical shots when facing against me, but in a magical way that can't be traced back to me!" * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * A week or so later, Pollox was in the middle of completing a rare delivery of metal ingots to the town of Grimshackle when he'd realized the town wouldn't remain standing much longer if he didn't throw his back into doing some manual labor hauling sandbags with his larger humanoid frame to shore up the town's protections from flooding. It wasn't normally something he'd feel inclined to do without a stated reward, but the flooding was all the locals would talk about and Pollox felt like it'd be a shame for all those metals he'd just delivered to get all rusty. Fend Off Flooding: 1d6+1 6
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Jun 9, 2023 05:55
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 Lucas, in his off time, had a special retreat in the woods. A cabin, alone and to itself, where nobody would bother him. On account of his... werewolfiness, nobody except his family and the King had ever seen his face, and he intended to keep it that way. So, this resting spot let him hang up his armor and recover his sore body without any of the other Troubleshooters finding out about it. Personally, his favorite recreational activity to do in his downtime was fish in the nearby lake. A hobby that was about to become shockingly relevant. ---------------------- Prayer: I'M BORED. But Daddy and Mommy grounded me. Nobody ever respects me! I wish I was treated like an adult! ------------------------- Lucas kept a strong grip on his sword as he lept into the air, his lupine legs carrying him high up as he slashed at a lethal leviathan. "Begone, foul creatures of the ocean! Taste my steel, and be cast out!" Ruin the Raging River Monsters: 1d6 6 BOON!
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Jun 9, 2023 06:09
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Few beings could wade into battle like a Knight of Style, but Sir Gandrazz as ever made this look good, and besting the benthic beasties look basic. Ruin the raging river monsters: 1d6 4 *** Do something nice for the Troubleshooters, O Wizard, for they fixed our well problem.
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Jun 9, 2023 10:04
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Name: Decent Solipsistic Warlock Description: Surprisingly nice, hence the Decent. Does not believe in his Hard-Done-By Pact Entity, hence the Solipsism. Request: My Warlock does not believe in me. Please convince him I exist, am powerful, and should be fairly bartered with. Thank you. Action: Fend Off Flooding: 1d6 1 The fearsome warlock stood ankle deep in water that was only the beginning of the grand mass of water that threatened the whole of the valley. But this would be close enough. He called on the misbegotten lore of the false power that was. That would put paid to this grandiose puddle. vorebane fucked around with this message at 12:33 on Jun 9, 2023 |
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Jun 9, 2023 12:20
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The Late Johnson Johnson Charged off with the other heavy bodies to fend off the terrible scourge of River Monsters. By which of course he means jogging just a little slower than everyone else so it wouldn't look like he was intentionally staying far back but not so much that he would be close to the front when something leapt out and attacked one of their number. Which happened right on cue as they got close to the river. After the heroics of several of their party Johnson contributed his efforts of his own, by sneaking up behind one that had been distracted by another member of the party, and clubbing it around the head. Ruin The Raging River Monsters, 1d6 = 5 TheNabster fucked around with this message at 16:27 on Jun 9, 2023 |
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Jun 9, 2023 12:50
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Gruff + 1 Gruff, in his time off, weeded through his garden full of turnips, pumpernickel, and rhubarb. Some of the neighbors didn’t get it, there was a perfectly fine market in town to get some of the more exotic vegetables; and what was wrong with just plain old wheat bread anyways? ------- If there was one thing Gruff knew from his life, it was the aches in his body that indicated what the weather was going to be. Seeking the aches in his bones, Gruff attempted to invert the feeling from aches indicating the coming of a storm to a dull, weary throbbing, indicating the end of a storm. Fix the Fish Storm: 1d6+1 4 Amazingly, it seemed to have some effect; the storm seemed to calm, if just a little. ----- Dear Wizard, our village is currently being flooded with what appears to be a giant flood of fish. Can you help us?
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Jun 9, 2023 14:09
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 Dang - Beetle Person was going all out tossing those sand bags. Four arms for labor must be handy! :dopplegrin: Fend Off Flooding: 1d6 1 RATTLED Actually, no. Four arms was very confusing and would take a lot more time to get proficient. Prayer(s): Thirty-six different athletes at the yearly cross-cultural-games all prayed to perform their best during each event.
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Jun 9, 2023 14:19
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"Wow! That's a biiiiigg ole flood, yup. Since you aready got those giant fishies handled, I guess I'll put all these earth elemental pieces I nicked to good use!" With gusto, Slingbring started flinging rocks infused with earth magic - water's counter element (yeah, you heard what they said!) - into the river and onto the banks to keep them stable and stolid against the surging flood. +Up riverbanks vs Flooding: 1d6 4 Request: "Oh good gods and better wizards, my poor Marthyia's is having a heatstroke! Someone help me cool her down!"
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Jun 9, 2023 14:49
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Dear Mr. Wizard guy my teacher thinks I'm lieing that my dog ate my homework and he's right that I lied, maybe you can make sure a dog actually ate my homework with your magic to get me out of detention ???
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Jun 9, 2023 15:49
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Request: O' great Very Good Wizard, I am but a poor artist trying to create great works of artistry, but my paintings always turn out warped, strange and tainted! Please, banish the artistic demons that befoul my great works and help bring my art to bold new life!
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Jun 9, 2023 16:22
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--- The last streetlight had turned off by the time he walked through his front door, but the early-morning quiet shattered when he entered the kitchen. "Papa!" "You're back!" Still in pajamas, his kids ran in his direction and clamped around his leg in a hug. "How many monsters did you fight? Did you get me a trophy?" "I'm going to tell everyone at school my dad is a hero." "Kids, kids -" he picked up his youngest and brushed his hand through his oldest's hair "- let's keep our voices down-- you know how grumpy yer mother gets if she doesn't catch all forty of her winks." He shepherded them back upstairs. Kids put back to bed, he unbuttoned his overalls when he caught a glimpse of the clock. Quarter to six. On a monday. Soon the world would wake once again, and his kids would be expected to show up for school. Bubba sighed, redid his button, and returned to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. Because that's what heroes did. --- Bubba checked the seal on his steel diving helmet a second, then a third time, and made sure the rope he'd tied around his waist and anchored to an ancient oak tree held his weight. During the great flood of '86, the Very Good Wizard had the wonderful idea to magically implant a bung at the bottom of each river, lake, and pond. Most of the time this only ever hindered people-- if the bung accidentally came loose, it caused widespread drought and crop failures. But now seemed like a good time to pop it and maybe go home early. He jumped into the raging river. 1d6=3 --- Prayer: "Help! I accidentally flushed a hundred shark babies down the toilet! Won't someone retrieve them all before they grow up to be sewer monsters?" Zybourne Clock fucked around with this message at 20:17 on Jun 9, 2023 |
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Jun 9, 2023 20:10
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 [1d6+1]So, here we are again. When last we left off, the V.B.W. managed to actually catch a soul; and now like the proverbial dog chasing its own tail, they had no idea what to do with it. Probably going to put in on a shelf somewhere, really add to the 'Bad' atmosphere. You know, as you do. Anywho, with nothing better to do they opted to tag along with the troubleshooters proper, which had nothing to do with their parole officer glaring at them. ----- Diplomat the Raging River Monsters: 1d6+1 7 Did you know the Very Bad Wizard spoke riverfolk? I didn't. "...and so if we adjust the border to here during the off-season, the number of human-fishfolk confrontations would decrease considerably." "Inversely, by moving it over there we might maintain casualty-parity, but concentrated towards higher value targets." "Nobody likes the tax-folk anyhow, so if a few go missing here and there it'll be fine." "Just have to make sure it's on the return trip, more treasure that way." "Oh, and spread a little on the shores sometime. Reinvest in your land-neighbors community, so they have more stuff to steal later." Shaking hands/fins, some of the more opportunistic riverfolk went to tell their friends about the latest plundering innovations to pursue elsewhere. Meanwhile, largely forgotten by this point, the parole officer was trying very hard to not throttle the wizard for kicking the problem upriver. Arcanuse fucked around with this message at 20:18 on Jun 9, 2023 |
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Jun 9, 2023 20:13
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Monsters: 34/25 Flooding: 21/25 Fish storm: 4/25 Piscine: 1/25 
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Jun 13, 2023 21:58
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 "Fiiiiiiiine, if you're all going to hog the kills I guess I'll help stack sandbags." "Spoilsports" Fend off Flooding: 1d6 4
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Jun 13, 2023 22:12
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Cedric Songcaller Cedric spends his down time travelling to small towns and singing the news of the world. Upon learning of the dire drizzle of dolphins, the entertainer quickly made his way into town and climbed up the the highest point he could. Then, he sang to the storm, calling the sun to burn it away, the clouds to flee, the fish to review their priorities- dropping from the sky or swimming in the sea. Dissipate Fish Storm: 1d6 5 - - - Good Wizard, a fish ate my husband, and then a wandering screaming soul possessed it. There is now a screaming ghost fish in my living room, and I kind of miss my husband.
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Jun 14, 2023 00:30
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Swancy spends his summer trying to convince the people of Besteria that the Piscine Invasion is actually just a new type of Fast Food. Spindoctor the Piscine Invasion: 1d5+1 = 5
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Jun 14, 2023 07:57
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And so it was that the Royal Troubleshooters, renowned for their unrivaled problem-solving skills, answered the call to Grimshackle in their Trouble Carts. The village stood in the aftermath of a wish gone awry, a testament to the Very Good Wizard's unintended consequences. As they arrived, the Troubleshooters beheld the chaos that plagued the village, their eyes surveying through the pounding rain the multiple challenges that lay before them. With decisive efficiency, the Troubleshooters divided into four specialized groups, each tasked with addressing a distinct issue that threatened Grimshackle's very existence. They knew that only their combined efforts could bring order back to the village and restore the balance that had been disrupted. They were less than confident that they were up to the task, but anything they could do would surely benefit the innocents of the doomed village. The first group, equipped with their knowledge of weather manipulation and mystical arts, turned their attention to the strange phenomenon of fish raining from the sky. With determination etched upon their faces, they sought to disperse the fish-laden clouds, devise counter-spells, or find unconventional methods to halt this unexpected deluge. --- Meanwhile, a team of skilled aquatic experts and elementalists took charge of the piscine invasion. Armed with nets and magical means to communicate with the aquatic creatures - as well as some sturdy clubs - they set out to guide the frenzied fish back to their natural habitat, restoring harmony to the river and alleviating the perilous situation faced by the villagers. An unfortunate Snalzkrak was set upon by a school of fish, and before he could be extracted one of the tenacious beasts had horribly melded to his skull! --- A group of formidable monster hunters and fishermen assembled, recognizing the need to confront the larger, more menacing fish that now roamed the river. Their combined knowledge of strategy and combat skills were put to the test as they devised plans to subdue or neutralize these formidable aquatic creatures, ensuring the safety of both the village and its fishermen. Doused in their mutagenic blood, Hood, Sir Lucas, and the Very Bad Wizard took upon piscine traits of their own, growing strong and moisturized with fishly energies. They found moving through the rushing water far easier, allowing them easier access to yet further prey! --- Lastly, an engineering team, armed with sandbags and tools, focused their efforts on fortifying the village against the encroaching floodwaters. They worked tirelessly to construct barriers, divert the surging river, and protect Grimshackle from being swept away entirely. The sopping wet, cold energies of the enchanted water seeped into the hardworking Troubleshooters, finally overwhelming Twice-Baked and the Decent Solipsistic Warlock. Water poured from eyes and mouths unending, and a strange damp laxity stole over them. --- The Troubleshooters kept at it for as long as they dared, but eventually they were called away. There were other fires in Berestia, and they simply could not allocate all their resources here forever. The village of Grimshackle had been saved from flooding and from the worst of the mutant fish, but fish still pattered down from the sky and surged from the waters onto the shore in crazed numbers. As the Troubleshooters pulled away glumly, they watched the villagers emerge from their houses and shake their heads in consternation - then begin to pile fallen fish into wheelbarrows and cart them away. Such were the lives of the people who lived in the shadow of the Very Good Wizard; the absurd became the norm, and if you couldn’t take it you were swept away. THE CHANGED posted:Those who gained a Boon gain +1 to future rolls. Those who were Twisted lose part of their roll, going from 1d6 to 1d5. Those so afflicted gain a Boon on a 5, now, and so on. He sent the Troubleshooters away to get what rest they could before the next event. Some hot soup and some time away from the front lines would do them good. And yet they couldn’t help staring up at the glowing point in the sky, the beacon atop the Island Castle. What terrors would he send down next? -O- It was a very bored Very Good Wizard who consulted his Cauldron one fateful night. He had read just about every book he could find in his Grand Library, had tried his hands at composing with the Highmatron’s Oracle Harp, and even had a quick duel with the Midnight Golem chained in his dungeons, and still he was restless. It had been a while since he Cast A Spell upon the people of Berestia, but he’d felt uncertain about that of late. A fair few of the prayers he received were… strange. Nonsensical blather that he tuned out. It upset him, but he found it hard to be too upset. There were always others that needed something. He drew a squirming wish and hearkened to it. quote:The circus is coming to town, but our town had a drought last year and we've not enough food to feed the circus. At this rate, they're not going to stop to set up camp... Cast The Spell: 1d4 1 Ah, that one went off without a hitch, he was sure of it. Feeling satisfied for the first time in ages, he trundled off to do more Very Good Wizarding elsewhere. -O- “Sigh, a Tier 1 Essence Twist of particularly unpleasant mein. We have hungry clowns, Troubleshooters. Kindly go deal with them.”  ASSIGNMENT BOARD posted:As a reminder each of you, pick a job from the board below and roll 1d6. On a 1, you’ll get Twisted. On a 6, you’ll get a Boon. Try to roll high. You, as a group, need to beat the target for each job. Complete them all, and you’ll successfully complete today’s VGW Duty. Fail, and some other stuff will happen!
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Jun 14, 2023 20:10
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The Neutral Snitchin' Rogue Boons: 1 Squeak Squeak The Neutral Snitchin' Rogue watched with a noncommittal gaze from the shadows as a clown stalked the lantern-lit night, their oversized shoes making comedic squeaky sounds, and their garish make-up clearly visible even in low light conditions. An optimal enemy. Sneak Attack. Hungry Hungry Clowns: 1d6+1 4 ------ Prayer: I heard some of the villagers talking that apparently The Very Good Wizard has been casting all kinds of spells to help people, but the unintended consequences of these spells always make them hurtful rather than helpful. It seems to be widely agreed upon that he should stop casting spells. Kind regards, Neutral Snitchin' Rogue
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Jun 14, 2023 20:27
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 Well, that was a very refreshing anomaly-dealing session for Hood. The menacing aquatic creatures had required a bit of knocking out to be pacified, enough for a diatribe.. Simply a shame that the others mostly cut them down where they stood, such fascinating piscine abnormalities torn to pieces! But still, Hood gained the contact information of a few of their friends, for later amiable communication, most good, yes. And their appearance had been blessed to be a bit more anomalous, itself, wonderfully done. The circus was always such a mirthful place, and The Very Good Wizard's kindhearted attempt at ensuring it stopped by certainly had its results. Hood bemoaned that they'd be eating all that sweet circus food. The clowns might have been turned anomalous, yet this was no reason to hog it all! No, no. Hood simply had to investigate their mundane anomaly, and negotiate them into controlling their ravenous hungers. Understanding required delicacy. Talk Down the Hungry Hungry Clowns1d6+1=2
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Jun 14, 2023 20:42
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"Aw, do we have to hurt them? Clowns are fun! Oh well… take this TRICK SHOT!" Somehow the only trick Slingbring managed was to get tied up in a neat bow by their own sling. Triiiiick shot: 1d6 1 Request: "I’m about to be buried by an avalanche and all of this yelling isn’t helping, but still - heeeeeeelp!"
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Jun 14, 2023 20:44
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 Twists: 1 Boons: 0 HERE LITTLE CLOWN I HAVE A FEESH FOR YOU COME EAT MY FEESH OFF MY FLEESH Clown Cillers: 1d5 3 Total so far: 10/60 ------- Dear Very Good Wizard, my sister's wedding is coming up soon but the bridesmaid dresses look too nice! Cant you make them look worse so my sister looks better on her special day?
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Jun 14, 2023 21:22
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