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Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Sorry, there's no children allowed in the dispensary. No you can't leave them in the car, it's 110F.


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Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Sir, it's not discrimination to check your ID. It's state law. No, we won't accept your utility bill as ID. You aren't a sovereign citizen of the state of Missouri, sir, please look up your own philosophy even once. You still need an ID. No, we still won't accept the utility bill as identification. Sir please stop punching the glass displays, it will only hurt you, nothing in the display is filled. Sir, please stop pissing in the ficus. Okay. Thanks. See you tomorrow.


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Areola Grande posted:

ur library card isn't gonna do it bud. no dice

But this is my ID!

Sir that's a Joe's Crab Shack gift card from 2009.


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


PHIZ KALIFA posted:

me, the manager: haha oh noooo inventory control's borked wicked bad and all the concentrate expired (huge sweeping arm motions into a black duffel bag) everyone step back im disposing safely of these bio hazards youre welcome im a HERO


:911: :patriot:


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


I chimed in with the, "haven't you people ever heard of bringing your ID, cash and ideas of what you want through the door, no?" It's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and affective sobriety. Otherwise they won't sell you weed, dickass.


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Yeah that guy was full of horse poo poo btw, it's not available legally anywhere lol.


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Delicious moistened taters


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


If someone is intoxicated or appears so, you're not supposed to let them in, but like, you get pushed into it and then you have Kevin the Acid Clown having a bad trip by the edibles display and you just kinda gotta roll with it until the security guard gets done watching the tick tock


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Areola Grande posted:

it's like u work here. he's tick tocking as we speak

I genuinely do not get the tick tock


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Areola Grande posted:

question for u hamjobs. this is Ocean Beach by Cookies. it clams to be 34% THC w/ terps totalling 1.52%.



my understanding is that Godfather holds the current record at 34% so I'm left feeling doobious

THC % is usually bullshit; however, 34% is no record lol. Regularly, you can get ultrahigh THC (yes for real, yes multiple actually-good labs can confirm it) weed that is primarily used for full spec concentrates.

Also I'll straight up tell you this, terpenes are bullshit for everything the state tells you. Terpenes are flavor, and they're canaries for the actual cannabinoids present (i.e., if there's high linalool, you're probably going to see high CBN; high limonene, you're probably going to see high d9 THC, etc., and even then that's not super reliable in all cases). The only terpenes currently proven to have ANY knock on effect is beta-caryophyllene (the one that has the black peppery flavor)--it's a VERY mild anti inflammatory. That's it.

Remember: this is still the wild west. What little good research we have was clandestine at best. We'll get there but it's going to take a while, I'm pushing as hard as I can.


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Also ngl cookies strains are strong but generally boring and the *brand* Cookies can be hot garbage and treats their people like poo poo. I'm dealing with some of that with a friend rn.


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Like, exactly, lol. Cookies is just a base strain that got really popular, someone slapped an expensive and vigorously defended trademark on their branding, and now everything is vaguely bready. It reminds me a lot of when everyone discovered Blue Dream at the same time and then that's all you could get, legal or otherwise, unless you really knew your poo poo, for almost 2 years.

It's p funny, ngl.


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Areola Grande posted:

management has announced that samples for employees are back babyyyy :peanut:

they're sending me home with two bags of gummies, a Crescendo pre-roll and an eighth of Lucinda Williams :peanut: :peanut: :peanut: :peanut:

Smoke the gummies, eat the preroll, marry Lucinda Williams


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Hot tip: always get smalls/popcorn, less stems, less breaking up before grinding, more kief :getin:


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Yeah uhhhhhhhh can I get some mids and make sure there's extra sticks in it, got a hot date and wanna impress the hell out of him.


Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Areola Grande posted:

ur in luck. mids are on sale today and so is reggie

Gimme that sticky brown dry brick cut up with a hacksaw uhhhhhhhh and uhhhh a little bit of that floor dust. I want that Reginald. That bad poo poo. I wanna cough like I'm in 8th grade trying to smoke a pine cone off a crushed Dr. Pepper can.


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Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Areola Grande posted:

ur taste is impeccable. have u considered working here? :allears:

But doctor, I *am* hamgliacci...


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