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signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008
Heads up, the mission is going sideways. I'm jacked in here with 30 petablips of power behind my brute force crack but it set off the main pipe in cyberworld. poo poo's going down fast, you better get here for evac. I'm gonna get as much datacryption downstream as I can get. Link up in 5, team.

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Tree Bucket
Apr 1, 2016

R.I.P.idura leucophrys
You're sure that's not just Clippy?

signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008
Negative. Clippy is strapped in where he belongs

Wendigee
Jul 19, 2004

Drop your sim and refresh cache. Turn power to minimal and aim for zones with lower security sensors. You try to bring that poo poo through a proper check point you're gonna get fried and if you survive that you'll be in a prison cube until they can harvest your organs.

Smugworth
Apr 18, 2003

Deploy ICE

signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008
I need a distraction in meatspace. Get to the northeast side of Kakikura Plaza and make some noise. I've got an application layer trace I gotta clean up, I think they're tracking my power modulation frequency.

Songbearer
Jul 12, 2007

Insight: Try to discern the fuck they said.


Tracing...

Knormal
Nov 11, 2001

Oh jeez, that's embarrassing.

Well the important thing is I was right about Star Trek.
Have you tried turning it off and then on again?

signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008

Knormal posted:

Have you tried turning it off and then on again?

Trust me. If this turns off, you won't want it back on.

I've deployed penetrator drones to exfoliate the pinhole forwarding. 806 repeat 806. I'm going up the stream

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011


When ilovebeersooomuch isn't posting, all the other goons should be asking "where's ilovebeersooomuch?" That's what I think.
I’m in

Songbearer
Jul 12, 2007

Insight: Try to discern the fuck they said.


I kick the throttle on my NUWED//J 510 ULTRA||BIKE, the tri-mag lenses irising to intensify the laser focused on the AcceleroKrystals within. I glide silently over through the slums of CORPWASTE-X, a landfill zone turned into a novelty vacation resort. Biomutants peer at me under asbestos sheets and between piles of rubble.

I nestle my cromarulean bike in a dark alley, its sleek glasstic body slithering like a cybereel into its tekcave. Ah. Just as described: A rusty terminal hidden under a pile of hackshish pipes and C++ grade methpatch pouches. I yank at my sixth eyelash on my left top eyelid and it extends three feet into a datananowire tipped with a USB-D connector.

Eyejacking in I can see signalnoise chased by deadly datawasps. They really kicked the joltornet's nest this time! I sigh. A hosed-up terminal like this will do nothing but static fry any countermeasures I send their way, so options are limited.

Hang tight, sig. I'm sending the only thing I know will reach you. Old reliable.

I flutter my eyelid to fire off a file, glowing neon bright in the datafog. GOATSE.JPG descends.

signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008
code:
H E L L
 Y E S
I'm back, baby

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
just pull the cord out of youre head and touch grass, black ICE can't touch u if you just hit da bricks

SonOfGhostDad
Nov 16, 2022

signalnoise posted:

Heads up, the mission is going sideways. I'm jacked in here with 30 petablips of power behind my brute force crack but it set off the main pipe in cyberworld. poo poo's going down fast, you better get here for evac. I'm gonna get as much datacryption downstream as I can get. Link up in 5, team.

turn on ur monitor

signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008
>> help jack
>> help unjack
>> help jack -out
>> jack -out
>> search help safety
>> yum "ICE balls"

R.L. Stine
Oct 19, 2007
haha this fool doesn't know how to jack off

Songbearer
Jul 12, 2007

Insight: Try to discern the fuck they said.


Holy poo poo, that datapacket you're hauling... it's almost 1 megabyte!! No wonder these boards are running so hot, a signature like that is gonna attract every fed from here to Neo York!!

Ultimate Shrek Fan
May 2, 2005
damnit, man. youve got to FORWARD the PORTS

signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008
I'm interpolating the Gaussian waveform stabilizer! Hold them back for 3 minutes and we're clear!

R.L. Stine
Oct 19, 2007
sudo systemctl stop plex.service

good luck watching breaking bad now, corpo losers

Internetjack
Sep 15, 2007

oh god how did this get here i am not good with computers
Top Cop
Encrypting your critical data into Goats.ex is a clever move. Use Lemon Party and 2 Girls as decoys, but encrypt them with more horrific stuff. That way they'll see those first and just be all WTF?! and then not search anymore.

You will have to move and get on the road though. Keep your EMP ready, but keep your phone, laptop and essential electronics in a travel bag that has proper Tesla shielding. You can't really shield your car that easily; hijack a truck from the 1960s if you need to.

Don't worry about contacting us; we'll contact you and bring you in. Once here you will be welcomed. You'll have food, clothing, living space; and you will be assigned a job; security, maintenance, health care, cleaning, etc.

The main thing right now is to get on the move.

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost
i hope you're using nordVPN, OP

signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008
It's been a while since I made an entry in the log. Here goes. I got the cover I needed to hold out against the Wang & Wangan corpos. 3 minutes for nearly 3 megabytes of hard data. It sells. I've been away from the thrill too long, but I still know how to rodeo a corporation system. I jacked out, with the job almost complete. We needed a buyer and soon. This wafertech goes for upwards of 8 arrays, you dig?

I took a bullet for this when I wasn't there, I think. It feels like there's a hole in me. Not good if they get out scent. We need to get back home yesterday.

DRIVE

Jesustheastronaut!
Mar 9, 2014




Lipstick Apathy
I'm running a penetration test on port 69.

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD

signalnoise posted:

I'm interpolating the Gaussian waveform stabilizer! Hold them back for 3 minutes and we're clear!

You have 10 minutes but as I said the library closes at 5 and you'll need to be off by then.

CEOofFART
Nov 24, 2024

i'm gonna tell lupus to release the pantsshitting gas within metroplex

The Wiggly Wizard
Aug 21, 2008


Enhance the backend

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981

Currently slicing into the mainframe, hacking the CPU pipeline to access data flow, I'm jacked in now, I've got interference, the daemon protection layer has activated, I've got to reach the server endpoint and terminate the cybernet connection

Squee
Jun 15, 2003
<3
I just downloaded a gigabyte of ram, should do the trick.

Rubber Chicken
Mar 13, 2024

[IMG-CHICKEN]

Squee posted:

I just downloaded a gigabyte of ram, should do the trick.

Don't forget to defrag your bandwidth

signalnoise
Mar 7, 2008
Hold onto your butts

we got COMPANY

CEOofFART
Nov 24, 2024

this thread is already better than that bruce sterling book i read

Xenthalon
Jun 28, 2010
I can get you to the cyberdrome, the masses of netheads jacking in there should provide you enough interference to not stick out like a sore thumb to the sentinels. After that you are on your own. And don't bring that kind of heat on me again

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bossy lady
Jul 9, 1983

ur mom's pussy has a use after free vulnerability

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