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Aug 11, 2016 04:25
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Direct quotes from neighbours: Wife: I don't know if it's safe to keep a gun in your car, what if someone tries to take it? Husband: Let them loving try. Child having tantrum Father: Shut the gently caress up you little human being. Child swears Father: Stop swearing you loving friend of the family. Asking them to stop that and their constantly barking dog only got me sweared at every time they get drunk. "gently caress you Bushmaori, loving human being hahahhahahaha" I want to move.
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Aug 11, 2016 04:43
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I lived in a house in New Orleans that was in a rapidly gentrifying neighborhood. We were the last poo poo holes left on the whole block. The wall was peeling of the back of the house- you could see sunlight through the roof, we had a roost of pigeons living in the wall of the kitchen. The kitchen floor itself was wavier than a skatepark, infested with roaches, and every appliance was broken or missing. We had 7 chickens who would just wander around making GBS threads everywhere, a roommate bought a gigantic diesel schoolbus and parked it on the street, obstructing like 5 people's regular parking spots. We had about 5 broke rear end mopeds chained to our fence. The patio was missing a structurally integral pillar, and was constantly swarmed with mosquitos because the hose leaked so there was a perpetual body of standing water. A tree fell in our yard and stayed there for months. The landlord only took cash. On top of that we tried to air bnb the place. Lmao. All your neighbors are fuckin saints.
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Aug 11, 2016 04:45
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One of my neighbors tried poisoning my dog with chicken wings and antifreeze when I was about 17. It was nothing fertilizing his yard with rock salt one night couldn't make up for. So I guess my advice for dealing with rear end in a top hat neighbors is to unleash your inner rear end in a top hat back at them. It's a safe outlet. 
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Aug 11, 2016 04:55
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Bushmaori posted:Direct quotes from neighbours: Lol... You talk like a fag and your poo poo's all retarded. One of my former neighbors welcomed my ex-wife and I into the neighborhood by ramming my car with his Crown Vic outside the developer's office. Later, in the same addition, there was a family (Mr. and Mrs. Cool Parents) on the opposite side of the pond from us that would have 25-30 drunk middle school kids running outside screaming around until 3am on the weekends. Then, there's all the resident octogenarians that think they own the place even though most of them haven't lived here as long as the younger people in the addition. I can't wait until my house sells.
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Aug 11, 2016 05:17
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Wasn't my neighbour but there was this woman who was the terror of the complex I lived in, around 2000 or so. She was in her 80s, could only get around with a walker, and incredibly, venomously, hated everyone. If I heard kids playing outside (we both lived on the ground floor) I could set my watch by her laboriously clumping outside to yell at them "you little loving faggots shut up before I rip the poo poo out of your little asses and shove it down your loving necks!" She had a cursing fluency that just amazed me. The odd thing is, she loved me for some reason; never swore at me, would tell me stories about how she was a nurse during WWII. I think it's because I was one of the few people who would hold the door for her when she was buzzing in. She would even clump outside to swear at like, birds, and squirrels. "Get the gently caress out of here you loving magpie gypsy jew thieves" and things like that. Bizarrely this continued until she nearly died under a collapsing stack of newspapers she'd been hoarding in her apartment for the last 40 years, and then The Man came and put her in The Home. I saw her kids then ("a worthless shower of oval office water you didn't even gently caress" in her words). Godspeed salty sailor mouthed lady. Godspeed.
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Aug 11, 2016 05:22
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How! posted:I lived in a house in New Orleans that was in a rapidly gentrifying neighborhood. We were the last poo poo holes left on the whole block. The wall was peeling of the back of the house- you could see sunlight through the roof, we had a roost of pigeons living in the wall of the kitchen. The kitchen floor itself was wavier than a skatepark, infested with roaches, and every appliance was broken or missing. Are you my friend John the punk rock anarchist guy I went to high school with?
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Aug 11, 2016 05:31
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Scaramouche posted:Wasn't my neighbour but there was this woman who was the terror of the complex I lived in, around 2000 or so. She was in her 80s, could only get around with a walker, and incredibly, venomously, hated everyone. If I heard kids playing outside (we both lived on the ground floor) I could set my watch by her laboriously clumping outside to yell at them "you little loving faggots shut up before I rip the poo poo out of your little asses and shove it down your loving necks!" She had a cursing fluency that just amazed me. The odd thing is, she loved me for some reason; never swore at me, would tell me stories about how she was a nurse during WWII. I think it's because I was one of the few people who would hold the door for her when she was buzzing in. She would even clump outside to swear at like, birds, and squirrels. "Get the gently caress out of here you loving magpie gypsy jew thieves" and things like that. hahaha awesome old lady
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Aug 11, 2016 05:40
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Cthulu Carl posted:A few years ago, I was living with a girlfriend and her cat tended... Well, he tended to be a cat. If you moved slightly in bed he'd get in your face headbutting and meowing. If you threw him out of bed he'd throw a temper tantrum, usually by opening and slamming the cabinets in either the bathroom or the kitchen. That cat is an rear end in a top hat and owns Scaramouche posted:Wasn't my neighbour but there was this woman who was the terror of the complex I lived in, around 2000 or so. She was in her 80s, could only get around with a walker, and incredibly, venomously, hated everyone. If I heard kids playing outside (we both lived on the ground floor) I could set my watch by her laboriously clumping outside to yell at them "you little loving faggots shut up before I rip the poo poo out of your little asses and shove it down your loving necks!" She had a cursing fluency that just amazed me. The odd thing is, she loved me for some reason; never swore at me, would tell me stories about how she was a nurse during WWII. I think it's because I was one of the few people who would hold the door for her when she was buzzing in. She would even clump outside to swear at like, birds, and squirrels. "Get the gently caress out of here you loving magpie gypsy jew thieves" and things like that. Also owns.
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Aug 11, 2016 06:03
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Wanna see my creepy neighbor offer to buy the hair of your cool salty ancient lady neighbor.
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Aug 11, 2016 12:25
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Wamdoodle posted:That cat is an rear end in a top hat and owns No poo poo. Some days he'd get angry at the ex for some slight and when she was blow drying her hair after her shower, he'd pop a squat in the bathroom sink (the bathroom his litter box was in no less) stare her down and piss in the sink. We stayed friends after we broke up so I'd cat sit for her from time to time. One time I walked into her apartment and he'd taken out every single roll of TP in the place, shredded them, then spread them all over her apartment. I texted her that everything looked fine, no messes to report, then held that bastard cat like a baby and rubbed his belly while he purred like a motherfucker.
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Aug 11, 2016 16:06
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Nooner posted:my first college house we used to throw huge ragers constantly and was basically the "unofficial" frat house since the cops were always all over the real one but our neighbors never called the cops, in fact our neighbor actually gave me his card after he found out I was in a fraternity and threw lots of parties at our place (he was a bail bondsman guessing he figured would get a lot of work lol) even when we were shootign off potato cannons into the air at like 1am no one seemed to give a gently caress. holy poo poo what a good time to be alive. I'd say we were the bad neighbors but never once had the cops called on us -- other than one tiem that was kinda my fault, my buddy was drunk af and all upset cause his ex was hooking up with another guy at the party and my great idea was to tell him to go blow off steam by breakign bottles in the street. Even then the cop just rolled by in the car and was like "hey we heard some guy was breaking bottles out here " and wasted as gently caress was just like "uhh yeah we made him leave" and cop was like "aiight" and rolled off, it was chill Being white owns am I right?
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Aug 11, 2016 16:17
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 04:10 |
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having mentally-competent neighbors (one of whom happens to be black, the other latino) owns because they're much quieter than the mentally-challenged white guy who wakes me up with his yelling about Jesus at 1 AM also I love being able to pass myself off as white
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Aug 11, 2016 17:42
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