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Didn't number 1 happen somewhere a couple of weeks ago?
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# ? Dec 7, 2012 22:53 |
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# ? Jun 3, 2024 22:04 |
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1. Stop the penalty, yell at the home manager to tell the PA guy to stop that. Take the penalty. Write it in your match report. 2. Sure. I guess you could compare it to if the striker pushed up on the defender to get higher for the header, but this seems more like protecting his face than trying to use the other person for leverage. 3. No goal. Drop ball at the point where the insanity occurred. Cry because it's going to be ugly.
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# ? Dec 8, 2012 01:49 |
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ManoliIsFat posted:
1) Punch the PA guy and let the penalty happen. 2) No goal 3) No goal and place the place where it happen.
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# ? Dec 8, 2012 04:56 |
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ManoliIsFat posted:
1.) Play on, note in match report. 2.) No goal, indirect kick for the defense from the spot of the foul or outside the 6 yard box because the striker put himself in a dangerous position and therefore it's dangerous play 3.) Play on, it's just another day in MLS. Remember that not only do you have to get the foul right but also the correct restart.
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# ? Dec 8, 2012 06:31 |
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1. Let the kick go ahead, put it in your report 2. Striker's put himself in a dangerous position, free kick to the defending team 3. Goal, it's karma or something.
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# ? Dec 9, 2012 19:42 |
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Stop! Hackett time!quote:1) You cannot intervene here during the game: the kick has to be taken, whatever anyone in the stadium is shouting. Calm everyone down and allow the kick to go ahead, but before restarting the game advise the home team's officials that the incident will be reported, and that they need to make sure there is no repeat. Thanks to Michael Bromhall. I think I mis-read #2 when I first saw it; I thought it was another variation on the old "ball kicked at face at point-blank range and instinctively uses hands to defend himself" chestnut. Now I actually read the question, it's a much simpler solution. There's also a competition! quote:Christmas competition: win a special one-off prize by sending us the most original question in the 55-year history of You are the Ref. To enter, email us before 13 December: Paul Trevillion will illustrate the three most imaginative, surreal, cryptic or entertaining ideas - with one winner taking the prize. Usual terms apply. Email address is you.are.the.ref at observer dot co dot uk. Get cracking!
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 13:59 |
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Given that Hackett's said they've received questions in the past like "What would you do if there was a pitch invasion, by aliens" that should be a very tough contest
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 14:24 |
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I'm sending in the Orangutan goalkeeper.
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 16:17 |
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"One of the players suffers a heart attack and dies, but his ghost rises out of his body and wishes to continue playing. What do you do?"
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 16:55 |
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Hey neat, I was sort of right. Also, look at Hackett spelling "judgment" like some kind of American!
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 17:21 |
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I think a Poo Hat question would fit all of the criteria they're looking for.
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 17:28 |
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"It's 2-1 in the 80th minute of an important title-deciding game when the Rapture happens and three players on each team are spirited up to Heaven. The manager of the winning team wants to continue the game and substitute on three new players, but the losing manager has already used all of his substitutes. What do you do?"
vyelkin fucked around with this message at 17:40 on Dec 10, 2012 |
# ? Dec 10, 2012 17:32 |
I'm putting my answers without reading Hackett yet, then I'm going to go back and see if I'm right. 1. Allow PK to go on, note in match report that PA guy tried to psych out kicker. Note it in the report, but I don't see this being much different from fans yelling at a player. 2. It can't be a goal, as he hand-balled it in to the net. Since Hackett says waist-level, it's not a dangerously high on the defender's part. It's going to be ugly, but disallow goal, IFK from where striker touched the ball, and talk to defender. If it's a dangerously high kick, yellow card the defender. Also, if you don't have the service where you can start your car remotely and have it unlock with a proximity key, call it in during some slow play so you can get the gently caress out while running away from the field post match. Give a note to one of your ARs with your last will and testament, and tell him to give it to your family should you not make it. 3. The foul on the defender holding the player who DIDN'T head it in is separate from the foul by the offense, even though they're at the same time. I would think it's like having somebody who is massively offside but never involved in the play - if an onside player scores on his own. It's a cluster-gently caress, but it's either an IFK for the defense, or a PK for the attacking team, since a foul was committed in the box. I'm guessing Hackett's answer is drop ball, but - I don't think you could ever say that it's the "same exact time" - you have a DOGSO by the defender, and a foul by the attacking player. I'd probably let it stand if it wasn't terrible, or allow a PK for the DOGSO by the defender. EDIT - poo poo, I was half right on #3...a drop ball on the 6' is just going to get you murdered, but again - if you're making a call and sticking with it, I would think that you could call for a PK as one of your options, but since you want to focus on the person who ended up actually connecting the header, yeah....free kick to defending team. Run.....run as fast as you can.
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 17:46 |
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Trin Tragula posted:Email address is you.are.the.ref at observer dot co dot uk. Get cracking!
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 18:48 |
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vyelkin posted:"It's 2-1 in the 80th minute of an important title-deciding game when the Rapture happens and three players on each team are spirited up to Heaven. The manager of the winning team wants to continue the game and substitute on three new players, but the losing manager has already used all of his substitutes. What do you do?" If you don't send this I just might
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 19:02 |
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Semprini posted:I've already submitted the old TRP favourite, clashing turbans. If this wins we're going to have to have a whip-round and buy Pissflaps a parmo or something.
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 19:12 |
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The Mash posted:If you don't send this I just might Just sent it in, we'll see what happens.
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 19:28 |
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I sent inquote:A defender is playing in a relegation decider against his hometown club. He hears from his bench that other results mean his team is guaranteed safety, and he kicks the ball out of his own goalkeeper's arms into the net to save his hometown club. What do you do?
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 19:56 |
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Popehoist posted:I sent in [edit] would it technically be possible, during the transfer window, for a team to sign one of their opponent's players at half-time? Hoops fucked around with this message at 21:29 on Dec 10, 2012 |
# ? Dec 10, 2012 21:27 |
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Hoops posted:It's a good question for any other week (yellow for unsportsmanlike conduct I guess), but it's not going to win most original. I'm trying to work something out with time travel from a black hole appearing on the pitch. "A midfielder, totally pumped up from his halftime talk, runs up and down the pitch near the speed of light, .9c, for the final 45 minutes. How much extra injury time do you add to account for the effects of time dilation? Does the game end for everyone at the same time?"
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 21:39 |
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Have they ever done one for identical twins sneaking on without using a sub?
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 21:53 |
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good luck ever getting your shirt if you do get picked. My question was picked and it even said I won the shirt but I never once heard back from them
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 21:59 |
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Here's a poo poo question one of you can send in if you feel like it: "A goalie miss-kicks a goal kick, sending the ball slowly spinning out of the penalty area. Since it's the dying minutes of a game, the only field player near the goal is the other teams' striker. Before the ball exits the penalty area to him, however, the goalie runs up and picks up the ball. The opposing team is outraged. What now?" It's probably pretty easy now that I think about it.
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 22:36 |
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Ovenmaster posted:Here's a poo poo question one of you can send in if you feel like it:
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 22:41 |
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Yeah, ball was never in play so the kick is retaken.
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 22:51 |
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It's just after kick-off. Every single player is dead, and they're coming for you next. What do you do?
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 23:09 |
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28 dives later
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# ? Dec 10, 2012 23:09 |
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During the game you notice that one of the managers is a Jedi and has been subtly manipulating the ball and linesmen to garner an unfair advantage. You approach to reprimand him and he informs you that he is not the manager you are looking for. What do you do next?
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 00:13 |
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Redundant posted:During the game you notice that one of the managers is a Jedi and has been subtly manipulating the ball and linesmen to garner an unfair advantage. You approach to reprimand him and he informs you that he is not the manager you are looking for. What do you do next? I really want you to submit this and Hackett's response to be "I would say 'You are not the manager I'm looking for' and return to refereeing the game. Redundant wins the shirt."
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 00:22 |
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You Are The Ref: The dying stages of the game, you suddenly realise you're a grown man wearing shorts shepherding a bunch of 21-year old millionaires with no education whilst they kick a ball at each other, on some grass. Your youth is gone, your dreams are dead, your life is not special. There is nothing but the tide of sadness as you realise that this is all there is. What now?
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 00:32 |
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"A team wants to field a morbidly obese goalkeeper who is fat enough that, when wedged into it, he blocks the entire net. He needs to be carried onto the field by a cart because he cannot walk, and rolled into the net by a group of bodybuilders. What action do you take?"
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 00:45 |
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Hoops posted:You Are The Ref: Restart life with an indirect free kick. I initially wrote this: quote:A player you already cautioned in the first half, has now picked up his second card in the second half. At that moment, his exact double streaks onto the field, completely nude and covered in a layer of ooze. He claims he is the original player, and the opposing team introduced this sophisticated clone at half-time, without anyone else's knowledge. When pressed, the manager admits he has been producing abominations. What do you do? But I ended up erasing it and writing something about wearing Santa hats.
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 00:46 |
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"A manager fields a team including identical octuplets. Twenty minutes in, one of your linesmen informs you that several of them have been switching jerseys back and forth when your back is turned, and none of you have any idea who is who anymore for yellow card purposes. What do you do?" "A player registers his shirt number as pi to one million decimal places, and the numbers on his jersey get so small that you cannot tell what they are. How many digits do you know by memory to write in your book when he is cautioned?"
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 00:52 |
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"Whilst playing a game in a closed stadium, the mechanics for the roof fail and it opens, unleashing a torrent of blood-rain. All the player's shirts are covered with the blood of the innocent, as are the spares. However, a passing merchant happens to have exact replicas of the 1940s shirts, which share the same colours, and is willing to part with them for your first born son. Your linesmen informs you that he is the anti-Christ, and this is the beginning of the apocalypse, however the two managers wish to play on. What do you do?" That got a bit weird.
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 01:19 |
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pretty telling that nobody in the stadium was raptured
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 01:37 |
Not my finest work, but my submission: You've been assigned a major mid-tier regional derby game, with reputation for attracting a rough crowd that uses foul language and is known to rush the pitch. In the 88th minute the score is tied at 1-1, and the away team is lined up for an indirect free kick just outside the penalty area. The kick-taker sends a beautiful cross to a completely unmarked striker, which much to your surprise performs a fancy-free sideways cartwheel and uses the bottom of his boots to tap the ball in to the top corner of the net. He lands on his side and begins celebrating upon seeing his amazing strike's result. In a bizarre twist, the striker's jersey has accidentally fallen off his body while cartwheeling the ball in to the net. You see that he's now performing his signature ballet celebration dance down the touchline, shirtless, further inciting an already raucous home crowd. The striker is already on a yellow for dissent, and you're shocked to hear the crowd chanting "Nancy boy!" as he pirouettes down the touchline. The defending team surround you, furious, demanding that you disallow the goal for dangerous play and issue a second yellow to the striker for removing his jersey. Your look to your linesman who shrugs and simply runs back to the midline, but points back to the striker. You see that he's now put his shirt back on, which shockingly has "Nancy" on the back above his number. His last name is Nancy. You're in a real pickle here. You are the Ref - what do you do?
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 01:37 |
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You guys are going to have to get more outrageous because so far the correct answer for every single one is to restart with a drop ball and make a note of it in your match report.
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 02:15 |
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That's the point. We want a massive appendix at the end of the LOAF that's basically "The big list of bizarre poo poo that ends in a drop ball"
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 08:55 |
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Your linesman has recently begun taking evening classes on quantum mechanics and with his newfound knowledge of the ambiguity of space and time says that the Heisenberg principal limits his true knowledge of offside and refuses to participate in this Newtonian illusion we have built for ourselves. How do you proceed?
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 15:53 |
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# ? Jun 3, 2024 22:04 |
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I sent in my question about a player eating a banana thrown at him from the stands, I just want some clarification Keith. Please.
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# ? Dec 11, 2012 16:13 |