Life of a Wizard CYOA

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Life of a Wizard CYOA

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Kanthulhu: Apr 8, 2009; NO ONE SPOIL GAME OF THRONES FOR ME!

IF SOMEONE TELLS ME THAT OBERYN MARTELL AND THE MOUNTAIN DIE THIS SEASON, I'M GOING TO BE PISSED.

BUT NOT HALF AS PISSED AS I'D BE IF SOMEONE WERE TO SPOIL VARYS KILLING A LANISTER!!!

(Dany shits in a field)

Don't waste money on a potion, just study the god damned books.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 03:00

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# ? May 9, 2024 02:14

Comstar: Apr 20, 2007; Are you happy now?

Study hard so we may one day conquer the world and know what a Magic Missile spell looks like.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 03:10

Anticheese: Feb 13, 2008; $60,000,000 sexbot

Lizard Wizard posted:

Buy the wizard adderall.

It's a potion, so drink the wizard coffee

# ? Aug 4, 2014 03:11

T-man: Aug 22, 2010; Talk shit, get bzzzt.

Drugs. They're for winners.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 03:42

Pyroi: Aug 17, 2013; gay elf noises

We learned how to warp reality without the use of Wizard Drugs.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 03:44

ThatPazuzu: Sep 8, 2011; I'm so depressed, I can't even blink.

quote:

The potion kept me awake and focused, allowing me to take better notes and study longer. I learned a lot of Arcana, but when I ran out of potion, I was sick for weeks.
(Arcana +30, Willpower -10)

It was during my second year at the Academy that I had my big Divination test. We were given a blank piece of paper and told to write down the answer. Our task was to use our magic to divine what the question was.

~~I begged my teacher for a hint, and she eventually helped me. (Needs 35 Personality)~~
I studied really hard, at the expense of my other classes.
I didn't even bother to try.

STATS posted:

Krogg the Romk, a troll student
Age: 16
50% Good/50% Evil
Body: 50%
Personality: 13%
Willpower: 8%
Fame: 1%

Gold: 0

INVENTORY:
A magical amulet that my grandfather used to own.

MAGIC:

Alchemy: 10%
Conjuration: 10%
Divination: 10%
Enchantment: 10%
Healing: 15%
Illusion: 10%
Necromancy: 15%
Summoning: 20%
Transmutation: 10%

KNOWLEDGE:

Arcana: 55%
Agriculture: 10%
Diplomacy: 15%
Economics:10%
Fighting: 62%
Geography: 5%
History: 5%
Nature: 5%
Religion: 5%
Smithing: 42%
Thievery: 0%
Warcraft: 10%

FRIENDS AND FOLLOWERS:
Familiar: George the rat
My horse named Horse

- a dwarf named Sheri, my girlfriend
- a human named Igor, a friend I met at the academy

FACTIONS:
Kingdom Citizens: 20
Royal Family: 0
Elves: -50
Dwarves: 10
Orcs: -30
Thieves Guild: 0
Mage Guild: 0
Fighter Guild: 0

ThatPazuzu fucked around with this message at 19:29 on Aug 5, 2014

# ? Aug 4, 2014 03:52

Amnistar: Nov 6, 2008; I am a wizard, not a poet.

gently caress divination, we don't have a cool scar so why should we care about the subject?

# ? Aug 4, 2014 03:54

T-man: Aug 22, 2010; Talk shit, get bzzzt.

gently caress it. Why would seeing into the future be useful?

# ? Aug 4, 2014 03:56

Bobbin Threadbare: Jan 2, 2009; I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

I figured divination wasn't worth the effort. It's only worth one forbidden school, after all.

VVVV Oh, fine, I seem to recall there's some mechanical benefit to graduating, so put in some effort.

Bobbin Threadbare fucked around with this message at 05:21 on Aug 4, 2014

# ? Aug 4, 2014 03:57

ThatPazuzu: Sep 8, 2011; I'm so depressed, I can't even blink.

Remember, if we fail a class, we can't graduate. If we study, our other skills will decrease.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 03:57

Snugglecakes: Dec 29, 2008

When cheating and drugs don't work we study hard

# ? Aug 4, 2014 04:03

T-man: Aug 22, 2010; Talk shit, get bzzzt.

ThatPazuzu posted:

Remember, if we fail a class, we can't graduate. If we study, our other skills will decrease.

poo poo. In that case, WORK HARD.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 04:12

Automatic Slim: Jul 1, 2007

Study.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 04:15

Tricky Dick Nixon: Jul 26, 2010; by Nyc_Tattoo

Considering it's about equal with our other classes, we can either decide they all suffer, or just this one. I'd rather just divination suffer.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 04:16

Successful Businessmanga: Mar 28, 2010

It was a clever ruse! There was actually no question so there wasn't any point in trying!

# ? Aug 4, 2014 04:20

KillHour: Oct 28, 2007

We studied hard because getting kicked out of school sucks.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 04:51

avoraciopoctules: Oct 22, 2012; What is this kid's DEAL?!

Don't bother with divination, unless you can do auguries with your own innards and then troll-regenerate them. Which you probably can't.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 04:55

Shinarato: Apr 22, 2013

Studying is obviously the best answer. How can we be a proper batwizard unless we can see every threat coming?

# ? Aug 4, 2014 05:20

seaborgium: Aug 1, 2002; "Nothing a shitload of bleach won't fix"

Study! How else will we know who to kill to help ease our eventual rise to power as the head of a giant necromantic army that crushes the elves.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 06:26

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Study hard you doofus!

# ? Aug 4, 2014 07:47

Anticheese: Feb 13, 2008; $60,000,000 sexbot

Going slightly off topic, reading this thread prompted me to toss a couple dollars down onto Choice of the Deathless for my phone. Its a pretty cool story about a wizard-lawyer's rise to power. An enjoyable read/play, and I couldn't stop laughing at moments like reacting to Hell being both made out of conventional materials and screaming souls fused together in bizarre mind-twisting geometry depending on which way you squint at it. One of the options is to simply say "Metal.", which your partner nods in agreement with.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 08:30

Darth TNT: Sep 20, 2013

If we don't graduate do we become like a badass renegade wizard and his gardener or does the story end?

Anyway, we studied hard. We need divination to predict where we can find fresh corpses before the paramedics come save them.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 10:53

ThatPazuzu: Sep 8, 2011; I'm so depressed, I can't even blink.

Darth TNT posted:

If we don't graduate do we become like a badass renegade wizard and his gardener or does the story end?

Anyway, we studied hard. We need divination to predict where we can find fresh corpses before the paramedics come save them.

We still become a sweet as hell wizard but we don't get our robes or a reputation boost with the Mage Guild.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 12:05

ThatPazuzu: Sep 8, 2011; I'm so depressed, I can't even blink.

quote:

I divined that the question was: "What is the teacher's favorite number?" It was 7. I wrote that down and passed the test.
(Willpower +3, Alchemy -2, Conjuration -2, Divination +12, Enchantment -2, Illusion -2, Summoning -2, Transmutation -2)

The Academy was filled with young men and women who were filled with hopes and dreams. Despite the fact that we were studying knowledge that seemed better suited to older people, we still acted like kids sometimes.

I met an attractive girl in my second year.
I didn't have time for such thoughts.

STATS posted:

Krogg the Romk, a troll student
Age: 16
50% Good/50% Evil
Body: 50%
Personality: 13%
Willpower: 11%
Fame: 1%

Gold: 0

INVENTORY:
A magical amulet that my grandfather used to own.

MAGIC:

Alchemy: 8%
Conjuration: 8%
Divination: 22%
Enchantment: 8%
Healing: 15%
Illusion: 8%
Necromancy: 15%
Summoning: 18%
Transmutation: 8%

KNOWLEDGE:

Arcana: 55%
Agriculture: 10%
Diplomacy: 15%
Economics:10%
Fighting: 62%
Geography: 5%
History: 5%
Nature: 5%
Religion: 5%
Smithing: 42%
Thievery: 0%
Warcraft: 10%

FRIENDS AND FOLLOWERS:
Familiar: George the rat
My horse named Horse

- a dwarf named Sheri, my girlfriend
- a human named Igor, a friend I met at the academy

FACTIONS:
Kingdom Citizens: 20
Royal Family: 0
Elves: -50
Dwarves: 10
Orcs: -30
Thieves Guild: 0
Mage Guild: 0
Fighter Guild: 0

ThatPazuzu fucked around with this message at 19:29 on Aug 5, 2014

# ? Aug 4, 2014 12:10

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Let's not be a shut-in nerd and try to go out with girls once in a while.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 12:22

M. Morgan: May 9, 2012

We have no time for the cooties and heartbreak of females ~~other than Sheri~~. We must study to make up for our previous failure :eng99:

# ? Aug 4, 2014 12:25

Snugglecakes: Dec 29, 2008

Let's be a shut-in nerd who still manages to go out with girls once in a while. :heysexy:

# ? Aug 4, 2014 12:51

Comstar: Apr 20, 2007; Are you happy now?

Get a Girlfriend because we'll need a willing sacrifice later.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 13:30

Darth TNT: Sep 20, 2013

Our previous one just didn't fit with us very well. We should trade in for a better girlfriend.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 14:17

ThatPazuzu: Sep 8, 2011; I'm so depressed, I can't even blink.

Alright. What's her name and race?

# ? Aug 4, 2014 14:35

Successful Businessmanga: Mar 28, 2010

Coincidentally Sheri the dwarf.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 14:40

Darth TNT: Sep 20, 2013

Sherry the Halfling. We are totally over Sheri and are not replacing her with a nearly identical knockoff.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 17:00

Bene Elim: Feb 9, 2010; The beast from Crete that can't be beat!

We've got a Human and a Dwarf already so an Elf is the obvious choice. Call her Bertha.

VV Keep your friends close... VV

Bene Elim fucked around with this message at 17:29 on Aug 4, 2014

# ? Aug 4, 2014 17:05

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Bene Elim posted:

We've got a Human and a Dwarf already so an Elf is the obvious choice. Call her Bertha.

Elves killed our parents. Wizard Batman has no need for elves.

Sherry the Halfling sounds good.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 17:12

Kanthulhu: Apr 8, 2009; NO ONE SPOIL GAME OF THRONES FOR ME!

IF SOMEONE TELLS ME THAT OBERYN MARTELL AND THE MOUNTAIN DIE THIS SEASON, I'M GOING TO BE PISSED.

BUT NOT HALF AS PISSED AS I'D BE IF SOMEONE WERE TO SPOIL VARYS KILLING A LANISTER!!!

(Dany shits in a field)

Darth TNT posted:

Sherry the Halfling. We are totally over Sheri and are not replacing her with a nearly identical knockoff.

Yes

# ? Aug 4, 2014 17:34

Sindai: Jan 24, 2007; i want to achieve immortality through not dying

Sherry the Halfling.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 17:42

T-man: Aug 22, 2010; Talk shit, get bzzzt.

Darth TNT posted:

Sherry the Halfling. We are totally over Sheri and are not replacing her with a nearly identical knockoff.

Don't break what isn't broken. :heysexy:

# ? Aug 4, 2014 18:03

ThatPazuzu: Sep 8, 2011; I'm so depressed, I can't even blink.

quote:

I wasn't surprised that I hadn't found a troll like myself to fall in love with. We were considered monsters, after all. I was glad that Sherry didn't see me that way. I found myself thinking about her eyes while meditating in Divination class, or wondering what it would be like to kiss her lips when I should have been practicing my conjuring.
(Personality +3)

But I loved Sheri, so I never saw Sherry again.
I broke up with Sheri so I could date Sherry.
I cheated on Sheri, having many passionate nights with Sherry.
But it never really amounted to anything.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 18:18

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Who's a two-timing bastard? We are.

# ? Aug 4, 2014 18:38

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# ? May 9, 2024 02:14

Affi: Dec 18, 2005; Break bread wit the enemy

X GON GIVE IT TO YA

Who's who again? Who cares, sleep with everyone!

# ? Aug 4, 2014 18:41

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Life of a Wizard CYOA

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