it's buttcoin.gov now

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > it's buttcoin.gov now

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stoutfish: Oct 8, 2012; by zen death robot

snype

# ? Aug 15, 2014 02:19

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 27, 2024 17:41

Damiya: Jul 3, 2012

Robawesome posted:

Hey guys, Just got offered a job relating to bitcoins. And I'm new to the whole thing. Help please. (self.Bitcoin)

submitted an hour ago by GKoala

So I recently replied to an ad for a job as an executive assistant to process bitcoin transactions. Here is what was described to me as the process:

A regular transaction would look like this:

A client registers and verifies his/her order on our website
The client sends funds to your account and confirms this to us
We let you know about the new transaction
You inform us after the funds have cleared into your account (usually 1-2 business days)
We place a buy order with the broker that manages all the bitcoin sellers.
I forward the deposit instructions to you
You cashout the funds, hold your commission and any banking fees and deposit the rest into the indicated seller's account, in person at a teller's desk( usually at Bank of America ).

Part of the job is that I need a bit-coin friendly bank, but after a quick google search I couldn't find much use. (I did find a bit on Bank of the West.

Can you guys help me find a bitcoin friendly bank in the Massachusetts area?

Thanks a lot guys.

what kind of person does it take to look at this and think 'yes, this sounds legitimate'

# ? Aug 15, 2014 02:27

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

Damiya posted:

what kind of person does it take to look at this and think

# ? Aug 15, 2014 02:31

Damiya: Jul 3, 2012

a bitcoiner

# ? Aug 15, 2014 02:31

duTrieux.: Oct 9, 2003

Robawesome posted:

Hey guys, Just got offered a job relating to bitcoins. And I'm new to the whole thing. Help please. (self.Bitcoin)

submitted an hour ago by GKoala

So I recently replied to an ad for a job as an executive assistant to process bitcoin transactions. Here is what was described to me as the process:

A regular transaction would look like this:

A client registers and verifies his/her order on our website
The client sends funds to your account and confirms this to us
We let you know about the new transaction
You inform us after the funds have cleared into your account (usually 1-2 business days)
We place a buy order with the broker that manages all the bitcoin sellers.
I forward the deposit instructions to you
You cashout the funds, hold your commission and any banking fees and deposit the rest into the indicated seller's account, in person at a teller's desk( usually at Bank of America ).

Part of the job is that I need a bit-coin friendly bank, but after a quick google search I couldn't find much use. (I did find a bit on Bank of the West.

Can you guys help me find a bitcoin friendly bank in the Massachusetts area?

Thanks a lot guys.

# ? Aug 15, 2014 03:25

Dren: Jan 5, 2001; Pillbug

Same Great Paste posted:

content from ^

code:

flareon:~ abadidea$ echo "AhvXyxUHl2D1hiwXKOKeuHRYEL1Nsmp9QYS08c0Emdub+A/G5rFstLg1THv+gzpNWTbqdKOyA8PrVCQ9KdBJLFs=" | base64 --decode --output ~/Desktop/tweet1.out
flareon:~ abadidea$ hexdump -C ~/Desktop/tweet1.out 
00000000  02 1b d7 cb 15 07 97 60  f5 86 2c 17 28 e2 9e b8  |.......`..,.(...|
00000010  74 58 10 bd 4d b2 6a 7d  41 84 b4 f1 cd 04 99 db  |tX..M.j}A.......|
00000020  9b f8 0f c6 e6 b1 6c b4  b8 35 4c 7b fe 83 3a 4d  |......l..5L{..:M|
00000030  59 36 ea 74 a3 b2 03 c3  eb 54 24 3d 29 d0 49 2c  |Y6.t.....T$=).I,|
00000040  5b                                                |[|
00000041


flareon:~ abadidea$ echo "AkHf/St2Y68RiadVqkGhIyTE+og7xQctpJwi56WiHR68dXyG3Wi5NXvGLEsOSyT7aLHAHynhJLExWly9qYKLbKM=" | base64 --decode --output ~/Desktop/tweet2.out
flareon:~ abadidea$ hexdump -C ~/Desktop/tweet2.out 
00000000  02 41 df fd 2b 76 63 af  11 89 a7 55 aa 41 a1 23  |.A..+vc....U.A.#|
00000010  24 c4 fa 88 3b c5 07 2d  a4 9c 22 e7 a5 a2 1d 1e  |$...;..-..".....|
00000020  bc 75 7c 86 dd 68 b9 35  7b c6 2c 4b 0e 4b 24 fb  |.u|..h.5{.,K.K$.|
00000030  68 b1 c0 1f 29 e1 24 b1  31 5a 5c bd a9 82 8b 6c  |h...).$.1Z\....l|
00000040  a3                                                |.|
00000041


They're both 65 bytes. Bitcoin keys, incidentally, are 64 bytes. ??? I don't know enough about Bitcoin to speculate further, but if you recover any lost treasure, please send me a share...

0x02 is ASCII start of text so if there's an extra byte there the first byte seems like a good candidate

# ? Aug 15, 2014 03:34

QuarkJets: Sep 8, 2008

Guys I need a bank that is friendly toward fake money that purports to be the poison pill that ends all banks

# ? Aug 15, 2014 04:55

Dixie Cretin Seaman: Jan 22, 2008; all hat and one catte; Hot Rope Guy

QuarkJets posted:

Guys I need a bank that is friendly toward fake money that purports to be the poison pill that ends all banks

its u (u are teh bank (be your own bank))

# ? Aug 15, 2014 05:00

computer toucher: Jan 8, 2012

Ursine Asylum posted:

"you can trust me because of this system, which you don't understand, but trust me it works" is the base of every "open source is more secure because it's open" argument

when the reality is that 99.99999% of people who use it don't have any interest in the backend and trust that the remaining .000001% who work on it aren't actively or accidentally loving them over

and then sometimes a bigass bug gets through like heartbleed and everyone's confused how it happened

tbf that's all software and most machines more complicated than a toaster.

# ? Aug 15, 2014 05:30

sharknado slashfic: Jun 24, 2011

Botxoins are dead rip them

# ? Aug 15, 2014 14:05

Robawesome: Jul 22, 2005

From the grey thread - logansryche's wife

quote:

A few months ago we were told we had till Augest 1st to move.. To find someplace to go. And we did butnow its June and we have no way to get their. We bought a a f150 we found on craigs list, we looked it over and saw it was crap and was basicly only worth junk rate..but still bought it.the guy we bought it from sold it to us promsising he would fix a few things but never did. The engine runs great but the body and other componites well.. thats another story.My has no job and i am on ssi do to a mental illness that leaves me paniced, scared, easily angered, and I know i can get abusive with my words.. Im easy to think of as a bitch i guess but worse. At One point i was so bad they had me on 4 medications.When on meds im a decent person but cant functuion the way everyone is supposed to. Crowds freak me out, and if i get stressed i hurt myself.. soo we do what we can. Currently we are spending all of the money I earn get on this truck wich is making it hard on me.. I cant afford shampoo, conditioner, shaving cream, or my facial cleaner.. I cant even afford to get to my appointments and am borrowing money i cant pay back just to get my medications. Were using so much money on that stupid truck we dont even have gass money. 68 a month for insurance.. 300 for rent, 150 to heat and electric.. I have maybe enough left after bills to be able to get food for my dog and pay for gass to get to my appointments and now hes telling me Oh wee need new tires these are dry rotted, the truck is in the worst shape, beds about to fall off literly being held on by 3 straps. The seats are falling apart but i have used fabric from thrift shops to patch the wholes.. , theirs a whole in the floor on the drivers side that lets the exsaust in. The Heat dont work but the ac does, the exsaust is falling apart, the cadilitic converter has a whole in it, and if you ride in it you get dizy fome the fumes. Its a junk vehical and all we want to do is use it to get to TN to get home.. to get safe.. someplace im not going to end up loosing my mind and end back up in a hospitle.. To top it off were being evicted from our home because the land lord cant afford to maintain the building any longer, and we have to move to TN. We Have family their willing to put us up.. how the gently caress are we supposed to get to TN in a vehical that gets 12 miles to the gallon leaks CO2, and has tires about to burst? I am at my wits end... I really have no idea what to do.. Im begging anyone who can help to donate what ever you can to help us get to were we need to be.. 400 for gas their, 600 to rent a trailier to pull our stuff, and 200 for the ability to eat on the way down.and 500 for tires. Thats all i really want.. I would give up eating if i knew it would make us able to get home.. Pleasee help us..

# ? Aug 15, 2014 15:53

wynott dunn: Aug 9, 2006; What is to be done?

Who or what can challenge, and stand a chance at beating, the corporate juggernauts dominating the world?

computer toucher posted:

tbf that's all software and most machines more complicated than a toaster.

most people don't give a poo poo how their toaster works either and just trust it won't kill their family

# ? Aug 15, 2014 15:55

Muscle Tracer: Feb 23, 2007; Medals only weigh one down.

Mulatto Butts posted:

most people don't give a poo poo how their toaster works either and just trust it won't kill their family

buttcoin is the ford pinto of currencies

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:01

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

Robawesome posted:

From the grey thread - logansryche's wife

literally rolling on the floor here so funny :iamafag:

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:05

Sniep: Mar 28, 2004; All I needed was that fatty blunt...

King of Breakfast

Mulatto Butts posted:

most people don't give a poo poo how their toaster works either and just trust it won't kill their family

im fairly certain most people understand exactly how a toaster works

are there really people out there mystified by it and just writing it off like "well, so far, i put in bread and push the lever and then you just gotta wait for a minute while the magic happens and out comes toast - i dont get it but it's so convenient! i don't have to visit the toastkeeper in the mornings any longer as this magic box does it for me! I wonder what is going on in there though?"

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:09

Chum Scandal: Oct 30, 2003

Robawesome posted:

From the grey thread - logansryche's wife

how long is the drive where they need a $200 food budget?

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:09

Fart.Bleed.Repeat.: Sep 29, 2001

is the bitcoin anime theater open yet? or are they still deciding on snacks and flavorings

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:22

The Management: Jan 2, 2010; sup, bitch?

Sniep posted:

im fairly certain most people understand exactly how a toaster works

are there really people out there mystified by it and just writing it off like "well, so far, i put in bread and push the lever and then you just gotta wait for a minute while the magic happens and out comes toast - i dont get it but it's so convenient! i don't have to visit the toastkeeper in the mornings any longer as this magic box does it for me! I wonder what is going on in there though?"

you'd be amazed at how many people "just never thought about it"

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:23

ellie the beep: Jun 15, 2007; Vaginas, my subject.
Plane hulls, my medium.

Sniep posted:

"well, so far, i put in bread and push the lever and then you just gotta wait for a minute while the magic happens and out comes toast - i dont get it but it's so convenient! i don't have to visit the toastkeeper in the mornings any longer as this magic box does it for me! I wonder what is going on in there though?"

please don't excerpt my diary

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:31

sleepy gary: Jan 11, 2006

Sniep posted:

im fairly certain most people understand exactly how a toaster works

are there really people out there mystified by it and just writing it off like "well, so far, i put in bread and push the lever and then you just gotta wait for a minute while the magic happens and out comes toast - i dont get it but it's so convenient! i don't have to visit the toastkeeper in the mornings any longer as this magic box does it for me! I wonder what is going on in there though?"

beyond knowing that if you heat up bread you get toast people don't know anything else about it

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:33

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

DNova posted:

beyond knowing that if you heat up bread you get toast people don't know anything else about it

please tell me more about those crazy dumb normals

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:47

Dren: Jan 5, 2001; Pillbug

Sniep posted:

im fairly certain most people understand exactly how a toaster works

are there really people out there mystified by it and just writing it off like "well, so far, i put in bread and push the lever and then you just gotta wait for a minute while the magic happens and out comes toast - i dont get it but it's so convenient! i don't have to visit the toastkeeper in the mornings any longer as this magic box does it for me! I wonder what is going on in there though?"

toasters are under threat from those who don't understand toasters as well as those who do understand them, but fear them

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:48

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

i mean seriously how goddamn arrogant do you have to be to assume that knowing how a toaster toasts toast is a point of superiority for you over other people?

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:51

FrozenVent: May 1, 2009; The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

Sniep posted:

im fairly certain most people understand exactly how a toaster works

are there really people out there mystified by it and just writing it off like "well, so far, i put in bread and push the lever and then you just gotta wait for a minute while the magic happens and out comes toast - i dont get it but it's so convenient! i don't have to visit the toastkeeper in the mornings any longer as this magic box does it for me! I wonder what is going on in there though?"

i keep bringing this up, but i have a friend who went to law school never realizing that cars made their own electricity; literally though that the radio, lights and poo poo ran off the battery and that's why you had to change the battery once in a while because you'd drain it

a lot of people don't think about how things work beyond "here's how you use it."

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:52

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

"deeeurrrrhhh how does the toastger get hot"

- nobody ever

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:53

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

Sniep posted:

im fairly certain most people understand exactly how a toaster works

are there really people out there mystified by it and just writing it off like "well, so far, i put in bread and push the lever and then you just gotta wait for a minute while the magic happens and out comes toast - i dont get it but it's so convenient! i don't have to visit the toastkeeper in the mornings any longer as this magic box does it for me! I wonder what is going on in there though?"

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:54

a cyberpunk goose: May 21, 2007

Sham bam bamina! posted:

please tell me more about those crazy dumb normals

i don't think the dude was making a DUMB NORMIES argument, nerds and EE people are loving awful and understanding a toaster or crypto currency (not like any coiners actually understand Bitcoin) doesn't make you a god among men

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:54

FrozenVent: May 1, 2009; The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

Sham bam bamina! posted:

"deeeurrrrhhh how does the toastger get hot"

- nobody ever

"it just does, there's electricity... like the stove i guess..."

-the average person

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:54

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

FrozenVent posted:

i keep bringing this up, but i have a friend who went to law school never realizing that cars made their own electricity; literally though that the radio, lights and poo poo ran off the battery and that's why you had to change the battery once in a while because you'd drain it

a lot of people don't think about how things work beyond "here's how you use it."

that's because the alternator is a much less obvious component than the battery, while it's the absolute baseline for specialized knowledge it's still specialized and it's hardly comparable to knowing what the loving glowing wire does

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:55

Dren: Jan 5, 2001; Pillbug

FrozenVent posted:

i keep bringing this up, but i have a friend who went to law school never realizing that cars made their own electricity; literally though that the radio, lights and poo poo ran off the battery and that's why you had to change the battery once in a while because you'd drain it

a lot of people don't think about how things work beyond "here's how you use it."

it's powered by the souls of the damned

yeah but it makes toast

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:55

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

FrozenVent posted:

"it just does, there's electricity... like the stove i guess..."

-the average person

i guess that's a bit more reasonable

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:56

sharknado slashfic: Jun 24, 2011

My understanding of microwaves is "some poo poo happens with waves that makes poo poo hot" but I can change my own oil which a lot of physicists have never contemplated so I dunno

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:56

big scary monsters: Sep 2, 2011; -~Ｓｋｕｌｌｗａｖｅ~-

sometimes when i'm toasting toast i think that i'd like to understand how a toaster makes toast and what the relationship between those hot glowing red coils and the toast is bvut then it seems too hard and i go back to playing kim kardashain: hollywood on my iphone. i guess i will never understand the mystery of toast

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:58

titaniumone: Jun 10, 2001

Sham bam bamina! posted:

i mean seriously how goddamn arrogant do you have to be to assume that knowing how a toaster toasts toast is a point of superiority for you over other people?

welcome 2 yospos enjoy ur stay

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:58

titaniumone: Jun 10, 2001

support your local toastkeeper

# ? Aug 15, 2014 16:59

FrozenVent: May 1, 2009; The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

nobody knows everything about everything, but when you're dealing with the public assuming that people understand something before you start is really really dumb, and a bad assumption

like i work in shipping, and when i explain stuff to people outside the industry i often have to start with archimede's principle, because people don't always get how steel ships float, nevermind how a propeller works, or how uneven loading will stress the ship's structure.

# ? Aug 15, 2014 17:00