Military Painstorm 5000 ULTRA SWOLE PT WORKOUT THREAD for [[Maximum Gains]]

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > Military Painstorm 5000 ULTRA SWOLE PT WORKOUT THREAD for [[Maximum Gains]]

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vulturesrow: Sep 25, 2011; _{Always gotta pay it forward.}

Oh, and gently caress you if you don't think a huge plate of spaghetti bolognese isn't the best post-workout meal.

# ? Aug 25, 2014 23:35

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 16:50

ElMaligno: Dec 31, 2004; Be Gay!
Do Crime!

Been keeping working out on a consistent way for the last few weeks, but more importantly I broke 3 digits on my press (100 lbs). Current workout looks like:

M/W/F - Lift-days, doing SS. Below are my working weights with the sets, set up as per this website
Workout A
Squats - 190 lbs
Press - 100 lbs
Power cleans - 110 lbs (taking it super slowly with these)
Pull ups - 2X5 (One at a time and I cannot do more that that :smith)

Workout B
Squats - 190 lbs
Deadlift - 190 lbs
Benchpress -150 lbs

Tue/Thu - BJJ/Cardio days, currently:
Tue - Two classes (one hour no-gi class, two hour gi class)
Thu - One class (one hour no-Gi class)

Sat/Sun - Rest days

Current goals:
- Squat and deadlift my bodyweight (probably doing this, but I haven't weighted myself in a while).
- Squat 290 lbs and take a picture because I am a nerd.
- Press 145
- Get to 185 or keep at 200 while lowering my overall fat %.

Future changes to the workout:
- Will eventually get a bicycle.
- Add another hour of BJJ.
- Gonna start adding 5 lbs to the woukouts every two weeks instead of weekly.

# ? Aug 25, 2014 23:48

elite_garbage_man: Apr 3, 2010; I THINK THAT "PRIMA DONNA" IS "PRE-MADONNA". I MAY BE ILLITERATE.

Keep getting swole dudes

# ? Aug 26, 2014 04:14

Mike-o: Dec 25, 2004; Now I'm in your room
And I'm in your bed; Grimey Drawer

i'm getting fat and i need to get swole, get rid of this freedom gut :smith:

# ? Aug 26, 2014 04:17

elite_garbage_man: Apr 3, 2010; I THINK THAT "PRIMA DONNA" IS "PRE-MADONNA". I MAY BE ILLITERATE.

My abs are like the stripes of old glory, and the bacne from the liver wrecking roids are the stars.
:911:

# ? Aug 26, 2014 04:27

vulturesrow: Sep 25, 2011; _{Always gotta pay it forward.}

Mike-o posted:

i'm getting fat and i need to get swole, get rid of this freedom gut

Well the good news is that it sounds like you are on the path to at least looking like an elite powerlifter lol.

# ? Aug 26, 2014 11:04

Ashmole: Oct 5, 2008; _{This wish was granted by Former DILF}

Did 5/3/1 before coming to Korea and got to a 375 deadlift. Stopped going to the gym as much due to the optempo and started to go back again...was struggling with 330. Now I'm getting back into the swing of things and am repping 315. I love this program and BBB is so simple and awesome.

# ? Aug 26, 2014 13:06

Aranan: May 21, 2007; Release the Kraken

Is this the 5/3/1 plan everyone is in love with?

# ? Aug 26, 2014 16:52

vulturesrow: Sep 25, 2011; _{Always gotta pay it forward.}

Yes

# ? Aug 26, 2014 18:24

elite_garbage_man: Apr 3, 2010; I THINK THAT "PRIMA DONNA" IS "PRE-MADONNA". I MAY BE ILLITERATE.

hit 375 on back squats for 13 reps and had to stop because of a nose bleed.

ARGGGGHHHH

# ? Aug 27, 2014 04:43

Nostalgia4Dogges: Jun 18, 2004; Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

13 reps? ATG? Or are you one of those dudes that loads up 4 plates on each side and gets about 3" in range of motion

# ? Aug 27, 2014 04:51

elite_garbage_man: Apr 3, 2010; I THINK THAT "PRIMA DONNA" IS "PRE-MADONNA". I MAY BE ILLITERATE.

I squat deeper than the Mariana Trench you nerd

# ? Aug 27, 2014 04:54

Nostalgia4Dogges: Jun 18, 2004; Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

Using any kind of knee sleeves or wraps at that point? Assuming a belt for sure

# ? Aug 27, 2014 04:58

elite_garbage_man: Apr 3, 2010; I THINK THAT "PRIMA DONNA" IS "PRE-MADONNA". I MAY BE ILLITERATE.

I use a belt and wrist wraps for max rep sets and maybe for a 1rm attempt, but that's it. I tried knee wraps at a clinic once, and wasn't sold.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 05:00

Nostalgia4Dogges: Jun 18, 2004; Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

I've been meaning to maybe order a set of SBD knee sleeves everyone raves about. Expensive, though.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 05:03

elite_garbage_man: Apr 3, 2010; I THINK THAT "PRIMA DONNA" IS "PRE-MADONNA". I MAY BE ILLITERATE.

If you get debilitating knee pain or plan on competing, then they may be worth it. I could see how they might be useful for over load training after you do some heavy sets without them too.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 05:25

vulturesrow: Sep 25, 2011; _{Always gotta pay it forward.}

elite_garbage_man posted:

I use a belt and wrist wraps for max rep sets and maybe for a 1rm attempt, but that's it. I tried knee wraps at a clinic once, and wasn't sold.

I've heard a lot of people say you definitely need to train with wraps for a bit of time to really get a feel for what they can do for you. Considering where I'm at in my squat progression it's not really even a consideration for me.

Speaking of squats, today was my first day doing BBB assistance for squats. I used 30% of the 1RM I'm basing my current 5/3/1 cycle on. Let me tell my legs are loving are loving toast right now. Not in a bad way, just really spent. Next two days are going to be interesting. Thankfully tomorrow is a rest day.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 05:27

Nostalgia4Dogges: Jun 18, 2004; Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

We taking about wraps or sleeves because I'm just talking about sleeves for a bit of compression and to keep the joint nice and warm.

I though I remember reading something about wraps being bad and messing with your patellar alignment idk

# ? Aug 27, 2014 05:29

Kung Fu Fist Fuck: Aug 9, 2009

elite_garbage_man posted:

hit 375 on back squats for 13 reps and had to stop because of a nose bleed.

ARGGGGHHHH

post a pic of your glutes tia

# ? Aug 27, 2014 05:37

elite_garbage_man: Apr 3, 2010; I THINK THAT "PRIMA DONNA" IS "PRE-MADONNA". I MAY BE ILLITERATE.

Those particular sleeves are used by plenty of competitors because of how tight they can get. the tighter they are = more spring out of the hole. The compression also helps alleviate pain above your knee in the lower quad, or in the patella tendon if your form is a little lack luster when your knees are come too far forward or pointed in a goofy direction. Personally, I just worked on my form to fix the quad pain.

as for my glutes, I get lots of stares and props for having massive donk. No one wants a hank hill rear end, yo.

Squatin' and deadliftin' builds big butts.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 05:45

Click Beelay: Oct 13, 2011

Full_depth_squats posted:

just wanted to chime in and say that IMO(and many other people's opinions as well) the bench press is easily cut out of anyone's routine, or at the very least minimized.

It is not important to anything but bodybuilders, football players that need to gain mass, and the sport of powerlifting. the pushup is a better exercise that works the core more. When you need to add weight just have someone put a plate or plates on your back. There is NO time in life when you need to push something with your back braced against a bench. It's functionless.

This is coming from someone with somewhat of a backround in kinesiology, and more importantly from someone who has access to people with much more of a background in kinesiology.

the bench press sucks as a functional exercise, regardless of what anyone on the internet tells you. End of story.

Obviously the deadlift and the squat are the two most important lifts. I would say that the standing military press with alignment is a fantastic exercise, but also that the pull up is equally as important. A seated military press is useless.

Also, working the chest with a bench press and doing no rows, YOU WILL gently caress your sholders at some point. Months or years on end of pushes but no pulls do not do a body good.

You're welcome, You Look Like poo poo boards

Game's over guys, turns out everyone ever has been doing it wrong forever.

elite_garbage_man posted:

Squatin' and deadliftin' builds big butts.

This, missues thinks it's weird/gets jealous so I made her drop a weird 3x15 program, written by a (free) PT at her gym, for SS. She's only at 28kg squat max so will see how it goes :shrug:

# ? Aug 27, 2014 08:29

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

Click Beelay posted:

Game's over guys, turns out everyone ever has been doing it wrong forever.

That dude is probably right from whatever narrow perspective he's looking at this from.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 09:37

Click Beelay: Oct 13, 2011

Yeah I said about as much after he kind of clarified himself, at first it seemed like "hey guys SS is wrong drop the bench completely".

Otoh, hit the gym semi drunk with mass honey soy garlic chicken energy and cleans are finally over 100kg including the bar. Next up, OHP.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 13:32

TheQuietWilds: Sep 8, 2009

MassivelyBuckNegro posted:

That dude is probably right from whatever narrow perspective he's looking at this from.

Not really. His argument is essentially that only "functional" movements are effective in training.

A) This is not true, you also have to consider CNS stress, and the use of isolation to train weak points. For example, if you do thrusters all the time (which is a pretty good functional movement), you may have previously well developed lower body and rely mostly on explosive leg power to get the bar moving, and not train the OHP portion of the lift. In that scenario, training strict press in isolation from the movement will yield better results than simply doing more thrusters. The analog of this is bench press to pushing something (like a prowler) in the real world. Your lower body push is probably so much stronger than your upper body push that the best training results will come from isolating the weaker portion of your body and training it. There's a reason linebackers do a ton of bench press, and it isn't just the fact that its a good mass-building exercise for chest.
2) The number of times you have to actually do a back squat or OHP in real life is minimal too, but that doesn't change the fact that they are important training movements.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 17:38

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

TheQuietWilds posted:

Not really. His argument is essentially that only "functional" movements are effective in training.

A) This is not true, you also have to consider CNS stress, and the use of isolation to train weak points. For example, if you do thrusters all the time (which is a pretty good functional movement), you may have previously well developed lower body and rely mostly on explosive leg power to get the bar moving, and not train the OHP portion of the lift. In that scenario, training strict press in isolation from the movement will yield better results than simply doing more thrusters. The analog of this is bench press to pushing something (like a prowler) in the real world. Your lower body push is probably so much stronger than your upper body push that the best training results will come from isolating the weaker portion of your body and training it. There's a reason linebackers do a ton of bench press, and it isn't just the fact that its a good mass-building exercise for chest.
2) The number of times you have to actually do a back squat or OHP in real life is minimal too, but that doesn't change the fact that they are important training movements.

Like I said, "from whatever narrow perspective he is looking at this from". I don't really care, I'm going to keep benching.

Hit 215x5x3 on the incline yesterday. I wish that the only other person in the gym at 3am didn't look like a concentration camp survivor so I could max out.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 18:16

vulturesrow: Sep 25, 2011; _{Always gotta pay it forward.}

MassivelyBuckNegro posted:

Like I said, "from whatever narrow perspective he is looking at this from". I don't really care, I'm going to keep benching.

Hit 215x5x3 on the incline yesterday. I wish that the only other person in the gym at 3am didn't look like a concentration camp survivor so I could max out.

No, he's a loving retard. He flat out said bench press doesn't build strength which is objectively incorrect. Furthermore 'functional strength' is a bullshit buzzword which is how he tried to couch his argument. Building strength, which bench press does, helps you get better at all physical activities, full stop. Funny how his OP has some snarky c comment about 'what you read on the internet' when he is all about 'the core' and 'functional fitness', the two biggest bs phrases going in regards to fitness.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 19:04

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

vulturesrow posted:

No, he's a loving retard. He flat out said bench press doesn't build strength which is objectively incorrect. Furthermore 'functional strength' is a bullshit buzzword which is how he tried to couch his argument. Building strength, which bench press does, helps you get better at all physical activities, full stop. Funny how his OP has some snarky c comment about 'what you read on the internet' when he is all about 'the core' and 'functional fitness', the two biggest bs phrases going in regards to fitness.

That wasn't in the quoted post and I don't read the ss thread or follow a ss routine. I don't care and I don't agree with him. If you want to argue with him, you're posting in the wrong thread.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 19:10

vulturesrow: Sep 25, 2011; _{Always gotta pay it forward.}

OK Mr. Poopie Pants.

# ? Aug 27, 2014 19:24

Kung Fu Fist Fuck: Aug 9, 2009

vulturesrow posted:

No, he's a loving retard. He flat out said bench press doesn't build strength which is objectively incorrect. Furthermore 'functional strength' is a bullshit buzzword which is how he tried to couch his argument. Building strength, which bench press does, helps you get better at all physical activities, full stop. Funny how his OP has some snarky c comment about 'what you read on the internet' when he is all about 'the core' and 'functional fitness', the two biggest bs phrases going in regards to fitness.

pretty funny when some dweeb posts some poo poo on an internet forum about not believing things you read on the internet. should be a clear indication of limited brain function. retard is just upset over his bird chest

# ? Aug 27, 2014 20:15

vains: May 26, 2004; A Big Ten institution offering distance education catering to adult learners

That's pretty much YLLS in a nutshell. There's a few people who are big and/or knowledgable and a lot of people just parroting what they read somewhere else.

# ? Aug 28, 2014 03:36

Click Beelay: Oct 13, 2011

Mate bought a factory and turned it into a boxing/gym business in a local low-mid income area with the nearest competitor about 20km away. It's doing well so far.

Protein + creatine discounts and $1.00/kg weights I'm in heaven, can finally ditch all but two of the 5kg plates I've had for 10 years.

# ? Sep 1, 2014 08:50

vulturesrow: Sep 25, 2011; _{Always gotta pay it forward.}

Click Beelay posted:

Mate bought a factory and turned it into a boxing/gym business in a local low-mid income area with the nearest competitor about 20km away. It's doing well so far.

Protein + creatine discounts and $1.00/kg weights I'm in heaven, can finally ditch all but two of the 5kg plates I've had for 10 years.

What are these kms and kgs of which you speak?

# ? Sep 2, 2014 19:50

Click Beelay: Oct 13, 2011

vulturesrow posted:

What are these kms and kgs of which you speak?

# ? Sep 4, 2014 06:57

ElMaligno: Dec 31, 2004; Be Gay!
Do Crime!

Hey guys any recommendations for non-caffeinated pre-workouts? I use No-explode 2.0 and they do have a caffeine free version.

# ? Sep 7, 2014 15:38

TheQuietWilds: Sep 8, 2009

ElMaligno posted:

Hey guys any recommendations for non-caffeinated pre-workouts? I use No-explode 2.0 and they do have a caffeine free version.

Just go to smartpowders and get all the ingredients you want. Cheaper, and you know you aren't getting fairydusted on any of the important stuff.

# ? Sep 7, 2014 16:32

Nostalgia4Dogges: Jun 18, 2004; Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

There's some supposedly decent albeit very expensive ones on amazon

Why no caffeine? I assure you if you don't want the "pre workout" jitters it's not the caffeine in the no-explode or whatever the kids are snorting these days

I just take 200mg pure caffeine from prolab. Think it comes out to $.5-10 a pill

# ? Sep 7, 2014 16:46

ElMaligno: Dec 31, 2004; Be Gay!
Do Crime!

TheQuietWilds posted:

Just go to smartpowders and get all the ingredients you want. Cheaper, and you know you aren't getting fairydusted on any of the important stuff.

I want to do this but I don't have a list of ingredients I want to use, I only have creatine in powder form and that's about it.

So what do you recommend?

Christoff posted:

There's some supposedly decent albeit very expensive ones on amazon

Why no caffeine? I assure you if you don't want the "pre workout" jitters it's not the caffeine in the no-explode or whatever the kids are snorting these days

I just take 200mg pure caffeine from prolab. Think it comes out to $.5-10 a pill

I don't get jitters, is that one day I took a scoop of pre-workout at like 10 in the morning and could not loving sleep that night. Its probably I went from 4+ cups a coffee and 1-2 scoops of preworkout on an almost daily manner to just 1 cup of coffee daily for the last 3 months or so.

# ? Sep 7, 2014 17:26

TheQuietWilds: Sep 8, 2009

ElMaligno posted:

I want to do this but I don't have a list of ingredients I want to use, I only have creatine in powder form and that's about it.
So what do you recommend?

For me, I take

Pre-workout:
Caffeine
Creatine
Beta Alanine
Taurine
*Citrulline Malate
*AAKG

The last two are known to not really do anything except make you feel like you're getting sick pumps. I like the tingly feeling they give me so I still take them, but honestly those are about all of the things you would possibly need. I'm also on 18mg Concerta (Methylphenidate), which is a stupidly powerful stimulant, but assuming you're not, some sort of 'racetam and choline would also be nice. Most of the other ingredients in pre-workouts are just pixie dust placebo. If you wanna get chemically amped up in the gym you're going to have to take a stimulant, and caffeine is really the best one. There's poo poo like sulbutiamine

Immediately post-workout I sometimes do the dextrose/BCAA thing, but more of then than not I just do a protein shake.

TheQuietWilds fucked around with this message at 18:46 on Sep 7, 2014

# ? Sep 7, 2014 18:43

Nostalgia4Dogges: Jun 18, 2004; Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

Beta alanine is a pretty good all around supplement with a lot of scientific research that'll help with plateaus or quicker gains

It gives a pretty good pre-work out feel and is actually beneficially. Like wilds says gives you a skin tingling meth feel. Some people can't stand it and it can be uncomfortable if you're just sitting around but feels good when getting pumps in

There a lot of pre workout concoctions you can find online and buy all the ingredients separately

If you're feeling spendy there's things like

Vega Sport Pre-Workout Energizer, Acai Berry, Tub https://www.amazon.com/dp/B005MJCLMY/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_ftkdub0YWZCMR

# ? Sep 7, 2014 19:31

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 16:50

TheQuietWilds: Sep 8, 2009

A lot of pre-workouts are just big doses of caffeine/BA/creatine with flavor/filler now the 1,3 DMAA is illegal (lol). The just add a huge list of things that are added in minute amounts (or not at all really) and hide behind "proprietary blend."

# ? Sep 7, 2014 19:40

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