Hail Joyous Baphomet, who does not age

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > Hail Joyous Baphomet, who does not age

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Hometown Slime Queen: Oct 26, 2004; the GOAT

look at a goat's eyes and tell me they are not satanic

# ? Sep 10, 2014 04:51

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 27, 2024 18:22

naem: May 29, 2011

Ork of Fiction posted:

Yeah, just ask the French king who murdered them all for blasphemy and took all their wealth and lands.

See now THAT'S metal

# ? Sep 10, 2014 04:52

TOILETLORD: Nov 13, 2012; by XyloJW

i like how people are going baphomet is all made up, all religions are just made up.

# ? Sep 10, 2014 04:54

big black turnout: Jan 13, 2009; Fallen Rib

what's a good old deity that hasn't been coopted by moderns?

# ? Sep 10, 2014 05:00

Smoking Crow: Feb 14, 2012; *laughs at u*

darkwing cuck posted:

what's a good old deity that hasn't been coopted by moderns?

ahura mazda but you're not allowed to join

# ? Sep 10, 2014 05:01

naem: May 29, 2011

TOILETLORD posted:

i like how people are going baphomet is all made up, all religions are just made up.

Shhhhhhhhh

# ? Sep 10, 2014 05:01

Blood Boils: Dec 27, 2006; Its not an S, on my planet it means QUIPS

Ave Light-bringer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjvYTPQ25-4

edit:

TOILETLORD posted:

all religions are just made up.

Well yah, can you name an ideology/concept that isn't?

# ? Sep 10, 2014 07:25

Dead Precedents: May 5, 2005; Precedents come and go, but death goes on forever.

Megadyptes posted:

hail satan, bitch

# ? Sep 10, 2014 07:41

Lucy Heartfilia: May 31, 2012

naem posted:

We're conquering the holy lands! Ok so, the bad guys? They worship um, goats! Yeah! An it looks like this! DRAWS A SPOOKY GOAT MAN

So if the bad guys get you and try to make you worship slender man, I mean the goat man, just like pretend ok??

Dude I'm scared what if slender man is real

HAIL SLENDER MAN

lmao

# ? Sep 10, 2014 07:57

site: Apr 6, 2007; Trans pride, Worldwide
Bitch

Jeez, haven't you guys read Alan Moore's From Hell?

Jahbulon is the real deity...

# ? Sep 10, 2014 08:00

SirDan3k: Jan 6, 2001; Trust me, you are taking this a lot more seriously then I am.

unlimited shrimp posted:

More like awww-phomet

# ? Sep 10, 2014 08:10

Business Gorillas: Mar 11, 2009

Smoking Crow posted:

ahura mazda but you're not allowed to join

god dammit the animes found out about zoroastrianism?
*flips table and leaves room*

# ? Sep 10, 2014 08:52

Dewgy: Nov 10, 2005; ~🚚special delivery~📦

unlimited shrimp posted:

nyawwww

hug satan :3:

# ? Sep 10, 2014 08:54

Blahsmack: Oct 25, 2003

# ? Sep 10, 2014 08:59

Mom with a blog: Jul 15, 2009; Comedy is basically self-deprecation.

# ? Sep 10, 2014 09:38

Woof Blitzer: Dec 29, 2012; [-]

rude satan

# ? Sep 10, 2014 09:46

SpaceGoatFarts: Jan 5, 2010; sic transit gloria mundi; Nap Ghost

Nathilus posted:

Baphomet isnt satan just saying.

Lucifer is a morning SON and as you can see from the tits, that aint him. The baphomet is actually a symbol of oneness out of dualities. hth.

The Baphomet wasn't even a goat until Levi confused everyone with his "goat of Mendes" poo poo. Just saying.

edit: bout that, where's that Baphomet statue the American satanists promised to unveil in the Oklahoma capitol?

# ? Sep 10, 2014 16:01

Demonachizer: Aug 7, 2004

semon demon posted:

What movie is that from?

# ? Sep 10, 2014 16:03

TOILETLORD: Nov 13, 2012; by XyloJW

Black Bones posted:

Ave Light-bringer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjvYTPQ25-4

edit:

Well yah, can you name an ideology/concept that isn't?

real numbers.

# ? Sep 10, 2014 16:03

nomadologique: Mar 9, 2011; DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO

naem posted:

It's some totally made up bs by the crusaders sorry thread

that don't stop baby baphomet from being qtpie

Black Bones posted:

Ave Light-bringer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjvYTPQ25-4

jangly satan folk??

# ? Sep 10, 2014 16:17

Luvcow: Jul 1, 2007; One day nearer spring

Hey.... New goat thread!

nomadologique posted:

that don't stop baby baphomet from being qtpie

One more

# ? Sep 10, 2014 16:19

Mulva: Sep 13, 2011; It's about time for my once per decade ban for being a consistently terrible poster.

The original claim is basically that the Templars went Muslim, and worshiped Mohammad. Add the better part of 500 years and every penny ante occultist throws "Baphomet" into their poo poo and you get the weird titty goat thing people think of as Baphomet. In reality Baphomet is just Mohammad, PBUH, and you are worshiping the Judeo-Christian God.

Which is like the least interesting form of social rebellion ever.

# ? Sep 10, 2014 16:27

ziasquinn: Jan 1, 2006; Fallen Rib

Yeah but what's his cutie mark

# ? Sep 10, 2014 16:28

SpaceGoatFarts: Jan 5, 2010; sic transit gloria mundi; Nap Ghost

# ? Sep 10, 2014 16:30

MegaGatts: Dec 12, 2004; The Enteroctopus dofleini, also known as the giant Pacific octopus (GPO) or North Pacific giant octopus, is a large marine cephalopod belonging to the phylum Mollusca and is tripping balls.

Lucy Heartfilia posted:

hail anime satan

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WIKqgE4BwAY

# ? Sep 10, 2014 16:35

Tricky D: Apr 1, 2005; I love um!

SpaceGoatFarts posted:

Sure, why not?

# ? Sep 10, 2014 16:55

joat mon: Oct 15, 2009; I am the master of my lamp;
I am the captain of my tub.

BAPHOMET SPEAKS:

FIRST, MY FOLLOWERS, YOU SHALL GATHER THE UNBELIEVERS IN ONE PLACE SO THAT WE MIGHT
Only the believers are granted the power to read the true words

THOSE THAT REPENT OF THEIR UNBELIEF SHALL BE GRANTED A PITTANCE OF MERCY ON THE FORM OF
For the true words would strike deaf and dumb the mind of an unbeliever

WHILE THE UNREPENTANT SHALL BE CAST INTO AN INESCAPABLE PLACE WHERE THEY SHALL BE
Yet bring peace and calm to those who accept our rule

# ? Sep 10, 2014 22:13

VendaGoat: Nov 1, 2005

joat mon posted:

If Joat's in, I'm all over this.

# ? Sep 11, 2014 01:18

Mulva: Sep 13, 2011; It's about time for my once per decade ban for being a consistently terrible poster.

Wanna hug that god.

# ? Sep 11, 2014 01:21

Von Pluring: Sep 19, 2003; Zelensky's Zealots; Pork Pro

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J9rWMrk2Rrw

# ? Sep 11, 2014 01:29

Ocean Book: Sep 27, 2010; - hi

Nathilus posted:

Baphomet isnt satan just saying.

Lucifer is a morning SON and as you can see from the tits, that aint him. The baphomet is actually a symbol of oneness out of dualities. hth.

if this is the case he should have a six pointed star instead of that bullshit 5 pointed one

# ? Sep 11, 2014 01:34

Baku: Aug 20, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

naem posted:

It's some totally made up bs by the crusaders sorry thread

I don't mean to burst youre bubble but all gods + demons are some bs that yokels made up

# ? Sep 11, 2014 02:03

Nathilus: Apr 4, 2002; I alone can see through the media bias.

I'm also stupid on a scale that can only be measured in Reddits.

SpaceGoatFarts posted:

The Baphomet wasn't even a goat until Levi confused everyone with his "goat of Mendes" poo poo. Just saying.

Occultists have had hundreds of years to gently caress about with the symbolism so it doesn't matter what was "originally" true. Since at least the 1600s the goat aspect of it has been held to symbolize the union of man and beast, just as the boobs and rod symbolize the union of male and female and the two moons represent light and darkness, or alternatively the left and right hand paths.

Ocean Book posted:

if this is the case he should have a six pointed star instead of that bullshit 5 pointed one

The classical four elements plus aether. FIFTH ELEMENT.

# ? Sep 11, 2014 03:11

naem: May 29, 2011

SpaceGoatFarts posted:

Jesus is going to return to fight the Antichrist as a multithreaded lion-snake-dragon with sword-tounges I feel like that's spooky enough for me right there

# ? Sep 11, 2014 03:36

unlimited shrimp: Aug 30, 2008

naem posted:

Jesus is going to return to fight the Antichrist as a multithreaded lion-snake-dragon with sword-tounges I feel like that's spooky enough for me right there

my money's on satan
sword tongues sound cool but i bet he cuts his own head off

# ? Sep 11, 2014 03:56

naem: May 29, 2011

# ? Sep 11, 2014 08:56

Absolute Lithops: Aug 28, 2011; After one long season
of waiting, after one
long season of wanting

Baphomet is literally a mispronunciation of hte word Muhammad. THe Europeans couldn't deal with the existence of another monotheistic religion so they made up a few different gods for Muslims to worship.

Anyway I like the Mountain Goats they're a good band

# ? Sep 11, 2014 09:11

Mermaid Autopsy: Jun 9, 2001

Hail Termagant

# ? Sep 11, 2014 10:14

Peppi: May 17, 2011; by Lowtax

My favourite demon lord of hell is Adobe the lord of rectal prolapse

# ? Sep 11, 2014 11:10

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 27, 2024 18:22

Kanthulhu: Apr 8, 2009; NO ONE SPOIL GAME OF THRONES FOR ME!

IF SOMEONE TELLS ME THAT OBERYN MARTELL AND THE MOUNTAIN DIE THIS SEASON, I'M GOING TO BE PISSED.

BUT NOT HALF AS PISSED AS I'D BE IF SOMEONE WERE TO SPOIL VARYS KILLING A LANISTER!!!

(Dany shits in a field)

My favorite evil satanic character is YHWH, the devil that convinced mortals he was a god.

# ? Sep 11, 2014 11:25

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > Hail Joyous Baphomet, who does not age

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