Neighbourhood Necromancer - Another fine CYOA from Choice of Games

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Neighbourhood Necromancer - Another fine CYOA from Choice of Games

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Word on the Wind: May 23, 2014

Command them to stop the bus.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 10:04

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# ? May 11, 2024 12:39

Azuth0667: Sep 20, 2011; By the word of Zoroaster, no business decision is poor when it involves Ahura Mazda.

Find transportation.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 12:39

where the red fern gropes: Aug 24, 2011

What the gently caress

# ? Oct 8, 2014 12:42

Oblivion4568238: Oct 10, 2012; The Inquisition.
What a show.
The Inquisition.
Here. We. Go.; College Slice

quote:

Hot-wiring a car for real is probably harder than it looks in Grand Theft Auto. But down the side of a house, you see a bicycle about your size. You scramble over a wall and grab it.

As you're pulling off, a woman runs out of the house. "Hey!" she shouts at you. She stops short and stares when she sees her bike is being ridden by a duck.

Ahead of you, the bus rattles around a few corners, but it never gets up to top speed. It runs into a large, wheeled, plastic bin and drags it around for another couple of minutes. You keep it in view as you pursue but you're getting tired.

Finally, it stops. The doors hiss open.

quote:

You're in the town centre now. The skeletons pile out of the bus and mill around aimlessly beside a large, official building. Every single one is wearing a sombrero. The trumpet players alternate random parps. They seem to aim for volume rather than melody.

Just as you roll up, breathing hard, a man with large whiskers and an immense barrel chest rams open the building's front door.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS RACKET?" he demands. "WE'RE HAVING A TOWN COUNCIL MEETING HERE�oh. Oh my word. It's�it's them." He lumbers back through the doors, still bellowing. "Gentlemen! Gentlemen! It's true. The horde of the undead is here. They've come for the office-bearers!"

The skeletons look at each other. They shrug, clavicles lifting in unison. Then they pile into the council building together.

Pile in after them.
Look around the back of the building.
Sit down and do nothing.

Stats posted:

A successful necromancer must manage an array of vital character statistics.

Control: 72%
Energy: 51% (-5)
Luck: 78%
Corruption: 3%
Humanity: 19%
Most people flee when they see you.

Your undead army consists of:
Skeletons: 6
Zombies: 1
and it has killed 3 people in total.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 15:38

FlocksOfMice: Feb 3, 2009

This is so incredibly stupid. Keep following and see how stupid it gets.

I think this is maybe the best Choice of Game

# ? Oct 8, 2014 15:48

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Six skeletons and a duck walk into a council building...

# ? Oct 8, 2014 15:49

Word on the Wind: May 23, 2014

We came this far, keep going.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 16:22

Bobbin Threadbare: Jan 2, 2009; I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

Pile on in.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 16:31

Kanthulhu: Apr 8, 2009; NO ONE SPOIL GAME OF THRONES FOR ME!

IF SOMEONE TELLS ME THAT OBERYN MARTELL AND THE MOUNTAIN DIE THIS SEASON, I'M GOING TO BE PISSED.

BUT NOT HALF AS PISSED AS I'D BE IF SOMEONE WERE TO SPOIL VARYS KILLING A LANISTER!!!

(Dany shits in a field)

Go In.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 16:44

Oblivion4568238: Oct 10, 2012; The Inquisition.
What a show.
The Inquisition.
Here. We. Go.; College Slice

quote:

This seems to be some kind of low-budget version of a town hall. The walls are lined with black and white pictures of fat people wearing frock coats. Occasional cabinets display engraved trophies for insignificant achievements. A certificate states that Basingstoke-on-Trent was "Council of the Year 1982".

You follow the screams through a grubby door.

quote:

The council chamber is a strange combination of very old, wooden panelling and cheap, plastic furniture. The council themselves seem to be an assortment of hard-faced men and women in shabby suits. Their meeting may have been quite dignified five minutes ago; now it is mayhem. One door hangs off its hinges. Several chairs and a table have been knocked over.

One of your skeletons is chasing a councillor around the perimeter of the room, jumping on and off tables. A tea lady squares up to another skeleton, thick arms raised in a boxer's stance.

At least three or four of the remaining councillors are trying to get a signal on their mobile phones.

This situation could swing in many different directions. What will you do?

Incapacitate the tea lady.
Control the skeletons and withdraw them.
Control the skeletons and slaughter as many as you can.
Watch for a while.
Make an impassioned speech on behalf of the dead.

No change in stats.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 16:52

Kanthulhu: Apr 8, 2009; NO ONE SPOIL GAME OF THRONES FOR ME!

IF SOMEONE TELLS ME THAT OBERYN MARTELL AND THE MOUNTAIN DIE THIS SEASON, I'M GOING TO BE PISSED.

BUT NOT HALF AS PISSED AS I'D BE IF SOMEONE WERE TO SPOIL VARYS KILLING A LANISTER!!!

(Dany shits in a field)

Slaughter as many as you can.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 16:53

Dolash: Oct 23, 2008; aNYWAY,
tHAT'S REALLY ALL THERE IS,
tO REPORT ON THE SUBJECT,
oF ME GETTING HURT,

Make an impassioned speech on behalf of the dead.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 16:55

Fangz: Jul 5, 2007; Oh I see! This must be the Bad Opinion Zone!

Speech! Speech! The dead have rights too! We're not taking this lying down!

# ? Oct 8, 2014 16:55

Odysseus S. Grant: Oct 12, 2011; Cats is the oldest and strongest emotion
of mankind

Our skeletons are so misunderstood, they just want to socialize. Speech!

# ? Oct 8, 2014 16:58

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Are undead not men? If you prick them, do they not bleed?

# ? Oct 8, 2014 17:01

Bobbin Threadbare: Jan 2, 2009; I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

"Skeletons just wanna have fun!"

# ? Oct 8, 2014 17:09

Slaan: Mar 16, 2009; ASHERAH DEMANDS I FEAST, I VOTE FOR A FEAST OF FLESH

Cathulhu posted:

Our skeletons are so misunderstood, they just want to socialize. Speech!

Let's bone up their knowledge of the undead with a bone shaking speech on the skeletons bone-ifides.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 17:10

MaskedHuzzah: Mar 26, 2009; Come now! Look me in the eye and tell me - isn't this the face of a guy you can trust?; Lipstick Apathy

Speech!

# ? Oct 8, 2014 18:48

ultrafilter: Aug 23, 2007; It's okay if you have any questions.

Screw talking, let's kill!

# ? Oct 8, 2014 19:07

Night10194: Feb 13, 2012; We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

Impassioned speech!

# ? Oct 8, 2014 19:20

Ouroborus: Mar 31, 2010; I really only come here for the Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens CYOA these days.
SA was one of the first websites I ever frequented, waaaaay back in the day. I only got off my ass and got an account about 8 years ago. I bought the platinum upgrade recently.

Impassioned speech...

Aw hell who am I kidding

Slaughter!

'cause you can't spell slaughter without laughter.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 19:38

Darth TNT: Sep 20, 2013

Speech

# ? Oct 8, 2014 20:01

Lord_Ventnor: Mar 30, 2010; The Worldwide Deadly Gangster Communist President

Friends, Countrymen, lend me your ears...

(Speech)

# ? Oct 8, 2014 20:01

Nyaa: Jan 7, 2010; Like, Nyaa.

I think this games is going for Overlord (evil) or Adam's Family (Humanity). This is the beat CYOA.

Make a speech as a duck. QUACK! QUACK!

# ? Oct 8, 2014 21:10

Anticheese: Feb 13, 2008; $60,000,000 sexbot

Speech!

# ? Oct 8, 2014 21:14

Oblivion4568238: Oct 10, 2012; The Inquisition.
What a show.
The Inquisition.
Here. We. Go.; College Slice

quote:

You step up on the central table, a large antique thing with a leather top. It gives an alarming creak beneath your weight. You look at the panicked council members, supposedly the most responsible citizens of your town, and launch into a spontaneous speech.

You talk of friends and relatives who passed on prematurely. You talk about the graveyard as a place for reflection and meditation. As you speak, the skeletons calm down and turn to listen. The councillors pause at the exits. Heads poke from beneath desks.

You remind the council that today, El Dia De Muertos, is celebrated in Latin America to cherish the memory of the dead, and the many lessons you learned from them during their life. You suggest that, from now on, Basingstoke-on-Trent declares this date as a local holiday, in order that its venerated dead may forever have a place in its heart. You warm to your theme until you have the attention of the entire room.

One of the younger men steps forward. "Why are you wearing a duck suit?" he asks.

Mayhem breaks out again. You sigh and wait for the room to clear.

Your skeletons assemble outside the council hall. It's time you had a word with them about their conduct today.

If we weren't wearing a duck suit (or any of the other disguises), the speech would have actually worked. Still, worth it to make a speech as a duck.

quote:

The skeletons stand around in their sombreros. Although they don't have expressions, exactly, their body language seems dejected. One kicks its trumpet along the pavement. The scrape of brass on tarmac forces you to cover your ears.

You have a discipline problem in your ranks. Maybe this is some kind of sacred day for the skeletons and you should make allowances for them. On the other hand, what if Christmas becomes a sacred day, too? St. Patrick's Day? Talk Like a Pirate Day?

Standing here, you're not far from the railway line. A whistling from the wires tells you a train is coming. You could sacrifice one skeleton as an example to the rest.

Drive one skeleton in front of the train.
Pretend to do this, but relent at the last moment.
Give the skeletons a stern lecture.
Forgive them.

Stats posted:

A successful necromancer must manage an array of vital character statistics.

Control: 72%
Energy: 51%
Luck: 71% (-7)
Corruption: 3%
Humanity: 19%
Most people flee when they see you.

Your undead army consists of:
Skeletons: 6
Zombies: 1
and it has killed 3 people in total.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 21:33

Slaan: Mar 16, 2009; ASHERAH DEMANDS I FEAST, I VOTE FOR A FEAST OF FLESH

Bad skeleton, bad!

# ? Oct 8, 2014 21:38

Darth TNT: Sep 20, 2013

That speech was golden, this thing keeps getting better.

Everyone loves stern lectures from people dressed like a duck.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 21:55

ultrafilter: Aug 23, 2007; It's okay if you have any questions.

Stern lecture.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 22:00

FlocksOfMice: Feb 3, 2009

Forgive the skeletons because I mean, put yourself in their shoes. If you were a skeleton you'd eventually give in to temptation and rattle your bones all day not care about the consequences

# ? Oct 8, 2014 22:24

Seraphic Neoman: Jul 19, 2011

Forgive the skeletons

Don't deadshame guys.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 22:28

Odysseus S. Grant: Oct 12, 2011; Cats is the oldest and strongest emotion
of mankind

Skeleton group hug! (forgive)

# ? Oct 8, 2014 22:28

Sindai: Jan 24, 2007; i want to achieve immortality through not dying

Stern lecture. They should at least warn us before they wander off to cause mayhem.

This is easily the best CO game anyone has LPed.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 22:47

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Now what did I tell you about wandering off without telling me where you're going?

# ? Oct 8, 2014 22:51

Night10194: Feb 13, 2012; We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

Give them a stern talking to.

# ? Oct 8, 2014 22:53

Bobbin Threadbare: Jan 2, 2009; I'm looking for a flock of urbanmechs.

Look, I get that this is your big day, but you've gotta warn me about this stuff first.

At least the skeletons don't ask silly questions like "Why are you a duck?"

# ? Oct 8, 2014 23:08

Galick: Nov 26, 2011; Why does Khajiit have to go to prison this time?

This is the best CYOA holy poo poo.

Now sons, I know that this is important to you, but don't be loving idiots.

# ? Oct 9, 2014 01:37

idonotlikepeas: May 29, 2010; This reasoning is possible for forums user idonotlikepeas!

Forgive them. Skeletons gotta skel.

# ? Oct 9, 2014 01:51

Automatic Slim: Jul 1, 2007

Stern lecture.

# ? Oct 9, 2014 02:38

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# ? May 11, 2024 12:39

Azuth0667: Sep 20, 2011; By the word of Zoroaster, no business decision is poor when it involves Ahura Mazda.

Forgive them they know not what they do.

# ? Oct 9, 2014 03:04

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Neighbourhood Necromancer - Another fine CYOA from Choice of Games

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