- Madmarker
- Jan 7, 2007
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My shameful Mercbrawl failure.
We got two weeks, so I have no excuse. I loved my original idea for this story, but completely lacked the chops to pull it off. This is what I have so far, 2/3's written and unedited. I have never spent so much effort on doing something so poorly. I am posting slightly early because I'm at work until deadline. I'm sorry to waste your time Merc, you are doing good work running these brawls.
Half of a London Story
1716 Words
The flyer said two, but Maddy had arrived at Parliament Square a half hour before the protest was due to start. It was still relatively quiet in the shadow of Big Ben, just the usual array of languid backpackers in the way of bankers and politicos, ties flying in the wind. Perhaps there had been more dreadlocks and natural fibres on the tube than normal, but it might have just been because she was looking for them. She’d always been the one to turn up before the party really started, forced into small talk with the hosts while they waited for other, trendier guests. Milling around waiting was giving her that same awkward feeling.
She popped in to a Cafe to pass the time. The barista was aussie, they always make great coffee, and this one was hot, too. She watched his strong young arms yank the machine’s handle around and smack it hard against the bench to eject the spent grounds. When she was married she’d envied the freedom of travellers like him, rootless and drifting, and it had taken her a while to realise how much closer to that her change of marital status had brought her. Sure, she still had her job to think about, but outside of work she answered only to herself.
When she got back to the square the crowds had really started to gather. White vans and minibuses were dropping off groups from the unions. Their colour coordinated uniforms and professionally lettered signs lent a disappointingly festive air to the scene. Maddy was hoping for something harder edged than a polite bunch of civil-servants, something dangerous. Across the road from the square, out of the sight of a couple of cops in high-vis vests, she saw a kid tying a handkerchief round her face. That was more like it. She looked both ways and crossed to the shadowy arches.
In the shadows of the arcade Maddy was surprised to see a ragged queue of about seven or eight young men in hoodies. Only in England would civil disobedience take the form of such orderly lines. The kid with the handkerchief round his face said a few words, but between his accent and the cloth over his mouth she couldn’t make them out. He rolled his eyes and pulled it down over his chin.
“Y’alright love?” His accent was the mixture of Cockney, Caribbean and North African that she heard from the back when she rode the bus. He didn’t look so intimidating up close with his face uncovered, he could have been any of the first years in one of her lectures. He was a good looking boy, maybe twenty years old, with a thin black moustache growing on his otherwise smooth, dark brown face.
“Fine, I think. I’m here for the protest.”
“Right place then, innit?” He looked over down the line. “Hey boys, Broad here wants in.”
One of the others, rummaging in a rucksack, looked up “Least she’s dressed right. Whatever, Bruv. Just look after her”. He was older and rougher looking, as were the rest. She was starting to turn around when the boy continued enthusiastically.
“So I’m Trevor, that’s Ray” He nodded at the guy with the bag. “The rest of ‘em are Ray’s mates.”
“Maddy, nice to meet you.”
“Just stick with us and you’ll be right. Most of them ponces just want to wave flags and sing, innit? If they want to get on TV they need people willing to start poo poo up”.
***
The march had headed up Whitehall before turning left down the Mall towards Buckingham Palace. She’d been there with Greg three months ago for the Royal Wedding, standing on tip-toes in the grass to try to catch a glimpse of the new Duke and Duchess through the bulletproof glass windows of their Bentley limo. What a hypocrite she’d been, teaching her Marxist theory on the one hand and propping up the Monarchy with her flag waving on the other. She wasn’t exactly a revolutionary but it was best just to avoid that stuff completely to stop Greg getting pissy. How had she ended up with such a complete Bastard? Walking in on him and that grad student was a blessing. Had she known it at the time she might not have slapped the bitch so hard.
Her group of new friends had fallen in behind a row of teachers with a huge banner, hiding them well from the cops that lined the mall despite the way their black tracksuits clashed in the sea of colours. Trevor was jerking his head around, eyes wide, trying to drink in everything around him. He grabbed at Ray’s bag.
“Come on bruv, gimme one.”
“Just settle down, stick to chirpsing with wifey.” There was a snort of laughter from further down the line. It was strange how they insisted on staying in such a neat row.
“Oh my days. That’s out of order. Come oooon.” He drew out the last word, reminding Maddy of her little brother whinging when he was little. At this Ray relented and reached into the rucksack and pulled out an orange stick with big black arrow pointing to one end. He tossed it to Trevor, who fumbled it a few times before catching it.
“Sick!” He pulled at a tab and the flare burst into life from the bottom end, spewing red smoke and flame over his trainers. He dropped it, shaking his hand in pain, then a murmur started through the crowd as the smoke rose and spread.
“Tear gas!” came a cry from behind them, and the crowd surged forward, building pressure at their backs. This was more like it. She grabbed Trevor’s shoulder and steadied him, he was still nursing his hand.
“I’m alright, I’m alright.” He gritted his teeth “Oh my days!”
She saw a small red mark on his hand, could have maybe used a band-aid but it wasn’t too bad. He saw her smirk and pulled himself together. With the commotion the protest had picked up speed, and it wasn’t long before they were in front of parliament, just a row of short barricades and the odd policeman between them and the tourist entrance. The cops seemed laid back, though the mounted one down the way was scary, her horse barded with clear plastic riot gear. Ray reached into the rucksack, and brought out half a dozen pairs of handcuffs. They jangled, innocent as a set of keys, but Maddy could see where this was headed. She imagined Greg sitting on the couch eating dinner, watching the news, and smiled at the thought of him spitting up his food when he saw her. Ray started handing out the handcuffs from his rucksack.
She was nervous now, though the plan seemed safe. She looked around, could there undercover officers in the crowd? She caught Trevor leaning back to check out her arse. She watched him look for a few seconds before he realized and blushed hard enough for her to see it clearly through the dark skin of his cheeks. She raised her eyebrows in mock admonishment, happy to be noticed by the young man.
“Well what are you waiting for?”
He looked at her for a second like she was speaking another language, before he remembered what he was doing and took the last pair. “You sure about this? It’s a wicked thing to do, know what I mean?”
He didn’t get time to hear the answer. Ray shouted the signal and the flare burst into life before being lobbed into the air by two of the crew. Then they made their run for the wrought iron fence surrounding the ornate gothic building. It was easier than she’d thought, half expecting to be tackled before they could even make it the few steps across the road. The clacking sound of the ratchets in the cuffs indicated that Ray and the others had done it, then Trevor’s slipped around her wrist and there they were, a human daisy-chain.
Down the fenceline she saw that one of the flares had landed beside the police horse, who was backing into a corner to try to get away. Their run had spurred on the rest of the protesters, too, and they’d started pressing up against the barricades and even hopping them in places. It was too much for the horse, which threw its rider and started walking straight towards them. Maddy, at the end of the chain, tried to swing herself around to give it room but it was headed directly along the fence line into their path, whinnying and bucking and stumbling back and forth just a few yards away.
When she threw herself against him, cowering from the horse, Trevor knew it was on him to keep Maddy safe. Ray had told him as much, and besides that he really liked her. He didn’t normally go after older women but something about her made him think she was up for it. He’d been screwing stuff up all day, but he felt steadier from the adrenaline running through his veins. Ray was ahead of him, pulling off his sneaker to get the key hidden there. The horse had turned, and kicked backwards in panic, catching Ray with a glancing blow on the leg. this spun him around, and the key went flying, catching the sun at the height of it’s arc. For the first time that day Trevor acted quickly. He pulled Maddy close to give the cuffs some slack, then he swung around ray and the others flicking the two out like the tip of a whip. He grimaced as the cuff connecting him to the others cut into his wrist, but he got up enough speed to catch the key in the folds of his hoodie as he fell to the ground with Maddie straddling his stomach. She took the key off his chest and used her free hand to unlock the cuffs connecting Trevor to the others, then threw it across in the direction of Ray.
The horse was still bucking and kicking, but a bunch of the cops had surrounded it and were trying to get it under control. More were on their way, with their sights set on the group.
??????????
Uhhhh........What?
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Oct 8, 2014 23:48
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 13, 2024 12:48
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- neetengie
- Jul 17, 2013
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Shittiest taste in anime and video games.
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My shameful Mercbrawl failure.
We got two weeks, so I have no excuse. I loved my original idea for this story, but completely lacked the chops to pull it off. This is what I have so far, 2/3's written and unedited. I have never spent so much effort on doing something so poorly. I am posting slightly early because I'm at work until deadline. I'm sorry to waste your time Merc, you are doing good work running these brawls.
Half of a London Story
1716 Words
The flyer said two, but Maddy had arrived at Parliament Square a half hour before the protest was due to start. It was still relatively quiet in the shadow of Big Ben, just the usual array of languid backpackers in the way of bankers and politicos, ties flying in the wind. Perhaps there had been more dreadlocks and natural fibres on the tube than normal, but it might have just been because she was looking for them. She’d always been the one to turn up before the party really started, forced into small talk with the hosts while they waited for other, trendier guests. Milling around waiting was giving her that same awkward feeling.
She popped in to a Cafe to pass the time. The barista was aussie, they always make great coffee, and this one was hot, too. She watched his strong young arms yank the machine’s handle around and smack it hard against the bench to eject the spent grounds. When she was married she’d envied the freedom of travellers like him, rootless and drifting, and it had taken her a while to realise how much closer to that her change of marital status had brought her. Sure, she still had her job to think about, but outside of work she answered only to herself.
When she got back to the square the crowds had really started to gather. White vans and minibuses were dropping off groups from the unions. Their colour coordinated uniforms and professionally lettered signs lent a disappointingly festive air to the scene. Maddy was hoping for something harder edged than a polite bunch of civil-servants, something dangerous. Across the road from the square, out of the sight of a couple of cops in high-vis vests, she saw a kid tying a handkerchief round her face. That was more like it. She looked both ways and crossed to the shadowy arches.
In the shadows of the arcade Maddy was surprised to see a ragged queue of about seven or eight young men in hoodies. Only in England would civil disobedience take the form of such orderly lines. The kid with the handkerchief round his face said a few words, but between his accent and the cloth over his mouth she couldn’t make them out. He rolled his eyes and pulled it down over his chin.
“Y’alright love?” His accent was the mixture of Cockney, Caribbean and North African that she heard from the back when she rode the bus. He didn’t look so intimidating up close with his face uncovered, he could have been any of the first years in one of her lectures. He was a good looking boy, maybe twenty years old, with a thin black moustache growing on his otherwise smooth, dark brown face.
“Fine, I think. I’m here for the protest.”
“Right place then, innit?” He looked over down the line. “Hey boys, Broad here wants in.”
One of the others, rummaging in a rucksack, looked up “Least she’s dressed right. Whatever, Bruv. Just look after her”. He was older and rougher looking, as were the rest. She was starting to turn around when the boy continued enthusiastically.
“So I’m Trevor, that’s Ray” He nodded at the guy with the bag. “The rest of ‘em are Ray’s mates.”
“Maddy, nice to meet you.”
“Just stick with us and you’ll be right. Most of them ponces just want to wave flags and sing, innit? If they want to get on TV they need people willing to start poo poo up”.
***
The march had headed up Whitehall before turning left down the Mall towards Buckingham Palace. She’d been there with Greg three months ago for the Royal Wedding, standing on tip-toes in the grass to try to catch a glimpse of the new Duke and Duchess through the bulletproof glass windows of their Bentley limo. What a hypocrite she’d been, teaching her Marxist theory on the one hand and propping up the Monarchy with her flag waving on the other. She wasn’t exactly a revolutionary but it was best just to avoid that stuff completely to stop Greg getting pissy. How had she ended up with such a complete Bastard? Walking in on him and that grad student was a blessing. Had she known it at the time she might not have slapped the bitch so hard.
Her group of new friends had fallen in behind a row of teachers with a huge banner, hiding them well from the cops that lined the mall despite the way their black tracksuits clashed in the sea of colours. Trevor was jerking his head around, eyes wide, trying to drink in everything around him. He grabbed at Ray’s bag.
“Come on bruv, gimme one.”
“Just settle down, stick to chirpsing with wifey.” There was a snort of laughter from further down the line. It was strange how they insisted on staying in such a neat row.
“Oh my days. That’s out of order. Come oooon.” He drew out the last word, reminding Maddy of her little brother whinging when he was little. At this Ray relented and reached into the rucksack and pulled out an orange stick with big black arrow pointing to one end. He tossed it to Trevor, who fumbled it a few times before catching it.
“Sick!” He pulled at a tab and the flare burst into life from the bottom end, spewing red smoke and flame over his trainers. He dropped it, shaking his hand in pain, then a murmur started through the crowd as the smoke rose and spread.
“Tear gas!” came a cry from behind them, and the crowd surged forward, building pressure at their backs. This was more like it. She grabbed Trevor’s shoulder and steadied him, he was still nursing his hand.
“I’m alright, I’m alright.” He gritted his teeth “Oh my days!”
She saw a small red mark on his hand, could have maybe used a band-aid but it wasn’t too bad. He saw her smirk and pulled himself together. With the commotion the protest had picked up speed, and it wasn’t long before they were in front of parliament, just a row of short barricades and the odd policeman between them and the tourist entrance. The cops seemed laid back, though the mounted one down the way was scary, her horse barded with clear plastic riot gear. Ray reached into the rucksack, and brought out half a dozen pairs of handcuffs. They jangled, innocent as a set of keys, but Maddy could see where this was headed. She imagined Greg sitting on the couch eating dinner, watching the news, and smiled at the thought of him spitting up his food when he saw her. Ray started handing out the handcuffs from his rucksack.
She was nervous now, though the plan seemed safe. She looked around, could there undercover officers in the crowd? She caught Trevor leaning back to check out her arse. She watched him look for a few seconds before he realized and blushed hard enough for her to see it clearly through the dark skin of his cheeks. She raised her eyebrows in mock admonishment, happy to be noticed by the young man.
“Well what are you waiting for?”
He looked at her for a second like she was speaking another language, before he remembered what he was doing and took the last pair. “You sure about this? It’s a wicked thing to do, know what I mean?”
He didn’t get time to hear the answer. Ray shouted the signal and the flare burst into life before being lobbed into the air by two of the crew. Then they made their run for the wrought iron fence surrounding the ornate gothic building. It was easier than she’d thought, half expecting to be tackled before they could even make it the few steps across the road. The clacking sound of the ratchets in the cuffs indicated that Ray and the others had done it, then Trevor’s slipped around her wrist and there they were, a human daisy-chain.
Down the fenceline she saw that one of the flares had landed beside the police horse, who was backing into a corner to try to get away. Their run had spurred on the rest of the protesters, too, and they’d started pressing up against the barricades and even hopping them in places. It was too much for the horse, which threw its rider and started walking straight towards them. Maddy, at the end of the chain, tried to swing herself around to give it room but it was headed directly along the fence line into their path, whinnying and bucking and stumbling back and forth just a few yards away.
When she threw herself against him, cowering from the horse, Trevor knew it was on him to keep Maddy safe. Ray had told him as much, and besides that he really liked her. He didn’t normally go after older women but something about her made him think she was up for it. He’d been screwing stuff up all day, but he felt steadier from the adrenaline running through his veins. Ray was ahead of him, pulling off his sneaker to get the key hidden there. The horse had turned, and kicked backwards in panic, catching Ray with a glancing blow on the leg. this spun him around, and the key went flying, catching the sun at the height of it’s arc. For the first time that day Trevor acted quickly. He pulled Maddy close to give the cuffs some slack, then he swung around ray and the others flicking the two out like the tip of a whip. He grimaced as the cuff connecting him to the others cut into his wrist, but he got up enough speed to catch the key in the folds of his hoodie as he fell to the ground with Maddie straddling his stomach. She took the key off his chest and used her free hand to unlock the cuffs connecting Trevor to the others, then threw it across in the direction of Ray.
The horse was still bucking and kicking, but a bunch of the cops had surrounded it and were trying to get it under control. More were on their way, with their sights set on the group.
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Oct 8, 2014 23:50
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- newtestleper
- Oct 30, 2003
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So very very tired......
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Oct 8, 2014 23:53
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- hey mom its 420
- May 12, 2007
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I see they're really stepping it up for Uncharted Realms, good job wizards ...
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Oct 8, 2014 23:56
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- The Wicked Wall
- Aug 24, 2012
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I guess the aphorism
"I think, therefore I am" brings little comfort in this case.
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Is this the bit where Buckingham Palace is spoiled as the next Legendary Land?
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Oct 8, 2014 23:57
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- Fuzzy Mammal
- Aug 15, 2001
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Lipstick Apathy
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awkward, check
strict(ly), miss
unnecessary double negative, miss
optimal, miss
1/4 buzzword rate: must not be magic related
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Oct 8, 2014 23:58
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- Lurchington
- Jan 2, 2003
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Forums Dragoon
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https://twitter.com/TrickMTG/status/519983354548981760
waiting for this playmat for awhile.
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Oct 8, 2014 23:59
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- newtestleper
- Oct 30, 2003
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Is this the bit where Buckingham Palace is spoiled as the next Legendary Land?
Nah they're giving us a 4 land cycle- Kings Cross, Fenchurch Street, Liverpool Street and Marylebone
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Oct 8, 2014 23:59
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- newtestleper
- Oct 30, 2003
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When are they spoiling the Jack the Ripper reference legendary creature?
Fog reprint
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Oct 9, 2014 00:02
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- I Love You!
- Dec 6, 2002
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Super excited about this weird 2color draft, especially after streaming the draft portion and the only comment made was "bad drafting man..." and then the guy left.
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Oct 9, 2014 00:05
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- Zoness
- Jul 24, 2011
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Talk to the hand.
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Grimey Drawer
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The feeling of "crack Wooded Foothills for Volcanic Island in response to your fetch, Stifle" is the best feeling in Magic. A close runner up is "Stifle your Storm trigger" followed by "Stifle your final suspend counter trigger on Ancestral Visions." My point is, Stifle is the best card.
Actually I'm pretty sure technically if they've identified what they're looking for they've already started searching and that means the fetch resolved. Just saying.
Also the actual best is remanding your own storm spell when they stifle it and then playing it again.
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Oct 9, 2014 00:16
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- Rinkles
- Oct 24, 2010
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What I'm getting at is...
Do you feel the same way?
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Super excited about this weird 2color draft, especially after streaming the draft portion and the only comment made was "bad drafting man..." and then the guy left.
I actually caught one of your drafts a couple of days ago, w/o knowing it was a goon. It was the only stream w/o music or a face cam, and I enjoyed your commentary.
(Why keep the the goofy modo sound effects on?)
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Oct 9, 2014 00:30
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- I Love You!
- Dec 6, 2002
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I actually caught one of your drafts a couple of days ago, w/o knowing it was a goon. It was the only stream w/o music or a face cam, and I enjoyed your commentary.
(Why keep the the goofy modo sound effects on?)
I could turn them off, they are nice reminders though sometimes for me. I'll try muting them in the future if they're distracting.
Glad you liked my commentary! I try to explain all the moves I'm making and why as I don't actually see anyone doing that consistently and I feel like it's a lot more helpful for players looking to improve their game and understand some of the stuff I'm doing.
Also, 2-0 round 1, this deck is awesome, that guy was so wrong
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Oct 9, 2014 00:36
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- neetengie
- Jul 17, 2013
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Shittiest taste in anime and video games.
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I could turn them off, they are nice reminders though sometimes for me. I'll try muting them in the future if they're distracting.
Glad you liked my commentary! I try to explain all the moves I'm making and why as I don't actually see anyone doing that consistently and I feel like it's a lot more helpful for players looking to improve their game and understand some of the stuff I'm doing.
Also, 2-0 round 1, this deck is awesome, that guy was so wrong
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Oct 9, 2014 00:38
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- Rinkles
- Oct 24, 2010
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What I'm getting at is...
Do you feel the same way?
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I'll try muting them in the future if they're distracting.
Nah, it's just unusual.
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Oct 9, 2014 00:39
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- I Love You!
- Dec 6, 2002
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gib link, if you have facecam on i will bully you
twitch.tv/tedsternator
I'm between rounds. Well, I was.
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Oct 9, 2014 00:41
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- Rinkles
- Oct 24, 2010
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What I'm getting at is...
Do you feel the same way?
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twitch.tv/tedsternator
I'm between rounds. Well, I was.
Actually, no headcam, no features, and no voice, unless you haven't said anything for a few minutes
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Oct 9, 2014 00:45
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- Asphyxious
- Jun 25, 2012
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I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life.
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Villainous Wealth seems really, really good, am I missing something here? Like is it you only have a mana pool of X to cast spells from or could you literally cast every card if X is high enough? And creatures cast this way are under your control?
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Oct 9, 2014 00:52
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- TheKingofSprings
- Oct 9, 2012
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Villainous Wealth seems really, really good, am I missing something here? Like is it you only have a mana pool of X to cast spells from or could you literally cast every card if X is high enough? And creatures cast this way are under your control?
It's a powerful card that also costs infinity to be worthwhile.
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Oct 9, 2014 00:54
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- Asphyxious
- Jun 25, 2012
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I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life.
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It's a powerful card that also costs infinity to be worthwhile.
I played X=5 and got Azban Ascendancy, High Sentinels of Arashin and Mer-ek Nightblade.
I was like "whoa this can't be right"
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Oct 9, 2014 00:58
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- qbert
- Oct 23, 2003
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It's both thrilling and terrifying.
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Villainous Wealth seems really, really good, am I missing something here? Like is it you only have a mana pool of X to cast spells from or could you literally cast every card if X is high enough? And creatures cast this way are under your control?
1) The spell is a complete gamble. You could hit the jackpot, or you could hit stone cold nothing.
2) The spell is quite expensive to be worthwhile.
3) The spell is entirely dependent on your opponent's deck. You could hit useful stuff or trash you don't need.
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Oct 9, 2014 01:01
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- Elyv
- Jun 14, 2013
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Villainous Wealth seems really, really good, am I missing something here? Like is it you only have a mana pool of X to cast spells from or could you literally cast every card if X is high enough? And creatures cast this way are under your control?
http://www.starcitygames.com/php/news/print.php?Article=8988
This is a good article for the problem with a card like overrun(or, possibly, villainous wealth; I haven't played with or against it enough to cast judgement). Basically it doesn't do anything early on and what it does when you cast it is super inconsistent. Yes, you hit all those good cards, but you could have also hit like 3 lands, a mana elf, and some other marginal spell or something.
I wouldn't be surprised to see Wealth see Constructed play, but I'd expect it to be more of a Genesis Wave style of deck, where the goal is to cast it for comically large numbers.
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Oct 9, 2014 01:23
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- Count Bleck
- Apr 5, 2010
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DISPEL MAGIC!
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http://www.starcitygames.com/php/news/print.php?Article=8988
This is a good article for the problem with a card like overrun(or, possibly, villainous wealth; I haven't played with or against it enough to cast judgement). Basically it doesn't do anything early on and what it does when you cast it is super inconsistent. Yes, you hit all those good cards, but you could have also hit like 3 lands, a mana elf, and some other marginal spell or something.
I wouldn't be surprised to see Wealth see Constructed play, but I'd expect it to be more of a Genesis Wave style of deck, where the goal is to cast it for comically large numbers.
Someone build this and name it Nega-Wave
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Oct 9, 2014 01:27
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 13, 2024 12:48
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- Cernunnos
- Sep 2, 2011
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ppbbbbttttthhhhh~
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Wish they'd made some Enchantment Lands. I know it probably would have been a bad idea but still.
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Oct 9, 2014 01:48
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Oct 8, 2014 23:48
Blimey, guv'na.
