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GOTTA STAY FAI posted:I would pay good money for footage of an event like this every six months or so featuring other games nostalgia-goggled nerds won't shut the gently caress up about Idk man I'd totally be happy with that. Earthbound is playable on precisely two systems, only one in downloadable format. FF7 can currently be played on three consoles, PC, two handhelds, and probably some wacky Japan-only cell phones. Kind of a different situation there.
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Apr 30, 2015 06:01
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Speaking of Earthbound has that come up in this thread yet? Cause despite how much I love Earthbound, that is seriously one of the worst places in any game and is clearly meant to annoy the gently caress out of the player. EDIT: Was referring to the Monkey Cave, somehow didn't write that in the original post like a dumbass. Internet Kraken has a new favorite as of 18:54 on Apr 30, 2015 |
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Apr 30, 2015 06:05
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Internet Kraken posted:Speaking of Earthbound has that come up in this thread yet? Cause despite how much I love Earthbound, that is seriously one of the worst places in any game and is clearly meant to annoy the gently caress out of the player. Uh, which place? Moonside? I always found that place hilariously weird.
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Apr 30, 2015 07:49
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My favorite Earthbound troll is the Apple kid and Orange Kid, there's a giant pencil statue you need to have erased by one of the kids, if you pay for the overpriced Orange kids solution he just takes your money and fucks off.
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Apr 30, 2015 08:27
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Ryoshi posted:Idk man I'd totally be happy with that. Earthbound is playable on precisely two systems, only one in downloadable format. FF7 can currently be played on three consoles, PC, two handhelds, and probably some wacky Japan-only cell phones. Kind of a different situation there. I meant the whole "hype it up as a totally re-done game for modern consoles then it turns out it's just a port" deal. Come on, you can't tell me this wouldn't be delicious: Big Gaming Expo 2015 is next month! And guess what? Tim Schafer just sent an enigmatic tweet about working on a project involving "his favorite game!" HOLY poo poo YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS! Then it's the big day--it's standing room only and all people can talk about is Schafer's tweet. "Will it be Psychonauts II or do you think it's Psychonauts: HD?" Then he walks onstage and the crowd starts going nuts. People are jumping around screaming. "It's been ten years..." The crowd loses its poo poo as the logo appears. Some neckbearded manchildren even break down crying. "And I'm proud to tell you that next year, the world will finally be able to play something that's been coming for a long time, and only on XBox One!" You can barely hear him over the roar of the crowd. One of the neckbeards actually faints. Then, the lights dim and the screens light up, showing a small 4:3 frame containing some gameplay footage from Psychonauts. "That's right, you can play Psychonauts on the XBox One!"
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Apr 30, 2015 12:49
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Internet Kraken posted:Speaking of Earthbound has that come up in this thread yet? Cause despite how much I love Earthbound, that is seriously one of the worst places in any game and is clearly meant to annoy the gently caress out of the player. Earthbound has a good copy protection bit too. If you have a pirated version, you encounter a shitload more random enemies than usual. Also if you actually make it to Gygas, the game crashes and erases all your saves. Fumaofthelake has a new favorite as of 15:57 on Apr 30, 2015 |
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Apr 30, 2015 15:51
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GOTTA STAY FAI posted:"That's right, you can play Psychonauts on the XBox One!" And they port it from the Xbox version with all the bugs and janky controls still intact, because that's part of the "experience." Tim Schafer then cackles and runs off stage, screaming that anyone who doesn't support him is a misogynist hitler. Broken age part 3 never gets released.
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Apr 30, 2015 15:54
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I played a HD, re-translated, CD quality sound FF7 on PC like two years ago. Mods for that game are absolutely insane. Also had a difficulty rebalance so it's not piss easy. It also used every character's battle sprites on the field instead of the SD no fingers models. And the modder went ahead and redid every character model in the game into something resembling a battle model, for every NPC.
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Apr 30, 2015 15:55
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Aesop Poprock posted:Why even make them worse? Why not just make them the same? There is a scout class melee weapon in TF2 called the Holy Mackerel. It has no power boost, it has no speed increase, it has no statistical difference from the default bat, except the fact that its animations make it a little bit harder to aim. There are 11 melee weapons for the scout, and 10 of them would be more useful than the Holy Mackerel. Every time you so much as graze somebody with it, it shows up in the kill feed. It tells everybody on the server in real time who you are hitting with it, and how many times you've hit them so far. If you manage to get a kill with it, it announces FISH KILL. I got one when it was first released, and I have never unequipped it.
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Apr 30, 2015 16:02
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RandomFerret posted:There is a scout class melee weapon in TF2 called the Holy Mackerel. It has no power boost, it has no speed increase, it has no statistical difference from the default bat, except the fact that its animations make it a little bit harder to aim. There are 11 melee weapons for the scout, and 10 of them would be more useful than the Holy Mackerel. It's actually ever so slightly better than the stock bat! The Holy Mackerel fish kill announcement isn't fooled by the Dead Ringer.
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Apr 30, 2015 16:13
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I first played through Morrowind on Xbox, so if I hosed things up, I couldn't use console commands to fix it. You need two artifacts, Sunder and Keening, to beat the game; due to an exploration fetish, I found one of these before I was supposed to, figured it had crappy stats, and sold it to a merchant. The merchants' inventories reset after a few in-game days, so once I finally got to the part of the plot where I realized I needed Sunder and Keening, all I could do was revisit a dungeon I'd already been to dozens of hours ago and reroll a new character. They fixed that (and being able to kill plot-essential NPCs) in Oblivion, but at least in Morrowind you got a fun message about how you'd doomed the world when you killed certain NPCs so you knew to reload. Also, pretty much any (old) roguelike ever is pure dev hatred. There are certain points where you'll realize the creator did something specifically to make the game less fun or playable. My flavor of choice was ADoM; without going into specifics, the closest I've ever come to beating the game was by hex editing to give myself unlimited wands of wishing, and then at about 80% of the way through the game I stepped on a tile I didn't realize was an altar and was sacrificed by an enemy I couldn't see. Realizing I couldn't beat the game by cheating was about the time I gave up. e: (Savescumming in ADoM was kind of useless, because at a random point determined by the RNG you'd be surrounded by wave after wave of ridiculously overpowered enemies.) RNG has a new favorite as of 16:46 on Apr 30, 2015 |
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Apr 30, 2015 16:44
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RNG posted:Also, pretty much any (old) roguelike ever is pure dev hatred. There are certain points where you'll realize the creator did something specifically to make the game less fun or playable. My flavor of choice was ADoM; without going into specifics, the closest I've ever come to beating the game was by hex editing to give myself unlimited wands of wishing, and then at about 80% of the way through the game I stepped on a tile I didn't realize was an altar and was sacrificed by an enemy I couldn't see. Realizing I couldn't beat the game by cheating was about the time I gave up. I got to the last boss (well, for the normal ending) in ADoM, without savescumming or cheating. At that point, the boss isn't even that hard. I got careless, messed up and died to it. I couldn't believe I -almost- beat the drat thing, only to mess up at the last possible spot. Haven't had the heart to pick it up and try again yet.
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Apr 30, 2015 17:02
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ADoM is actually my favorite roguelike. I've managed to beat it a few times and the thing with it is that it has obtuse horrible mechanics hat you are expected to learn the function of and put to use. This is the hallmark of most roguelikes and is partly the reason I enjoy playing them. It's about bashing your head against a wall until you learn why your dying, then you learn how to live, then eventuall you learn how the game works and start trying to actually win. The're hard and unforgiving but I wouldn't really consider them a troll. No, if you want a troll roguelike look to IVAN. It's an acronym for a russian (appropriately) name which means something along the lines of 'a slow march to death' . Like most roguelikes the game has vast complex systems that you can learn and abuse in order to actually make progress. If you don't know the systems you'll die early in horrible horrible ways. The game features location based damage so you can for instance get your arm cut off. (some) Enemies can pick up things off the ground so theoretically they can pick up your severed arm and beat you with it. My very first playthrough of IVAN featured me getting both arms and legs chopped off (which takes away most, but not all of your mobility) and ended up rolling around on the dungeon floor until I bled out. What makes IVAN a troll is that rather than having enemies scale in difficulty by location like every other roguelike in existance they scale based on your characters power. There is a hidden mechanic measuring how good you are that takes things like equipment, level, and other powers into account, and makes sure to spawn enemies that can kill you. If you get lucky and find the most powerful weapon in the game on floor 1, floor 2 will spawn greater balrogs that kill you. There is no beating IVAN, it wasn't designed to be beaten, it was designed to explore the futility of the attempt. Though interestingly if you make your character invincible by cheating the game itself is huge, detailed, with massive intricate systems that are actually really interesting. The writing is good and the game is fun. Too bad the developer doesn't want you to beat the second dungeon ever.
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Apr 30, 2015 18:08
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Xad posted:Uh, which place? Moonside? I always found that place hilariously weird. Wow I'm an idiot and somehow wrote that post without mentioning the thing I was talking about  I was referring to the Monkey Cave, which just seems like a huge "gently caress YOU" to the player. Its a dungeon filled with low level but annoying enemies that just waste your time. However, each door to progress is guarded by a monkey. The monkeys all want different obscure items before they will let you pass them. In most games this would only be slightly irritating, but Earthbound has a TERRIBLE inventory system. Each character can only hold a small number of items and key items take up inventory spaces as well. So there's no way you're gonna be hoarding all the stuff the monkeys want. You can actually get most of the stuff in the cave by trading with the monkeys, but that involves finding the right ones and running across the cave over and over. And then when you finally get to the end, there's a blockade you need a key item to pass. A ley item you probably put in storage because it hadn't been used in ages and was taking up space. Oh, and during all this it plays one of the most obnoxious songs I've heard in a game. Pixeltendo posted:My favorite Earthbound troll is the Apple kid and Orange Kid, there's a giant pencil statue you need to have erased by one of the kids, if you pay for the overpriced Orange kids solution he just takes your money and fucks off. Not entirely. If you invest in him over the coure of the game he will give you periodic updates on the status of his latest invention, the egg unboiler. He's really close to getting it finished. Its gonna be great, just you wait 
Internet Kraken has a new favorite as of 18:55 on Apr 30, 2015 |
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Apr 30, 2015 18:53
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Tiggum posted:What problem are you contributing to? Developers not getting enough money to finish their games.
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Apr 30, 2015 19:38
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Internet Kraken posted:Not entirely. If you invest in him over the coure of the game he will give you periodic updates on the status of his latest invention, the egg unboiler. He's really close to getting it finished. Its gonna be great, just you wait Orange Kid: the inventor of crowdfunding?
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Apr 30, 2015 20:44
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Internet Kraken posted:Not entirely. If you invest in him over the coure of the game he will give you periodic updates on the status of his latest invention, the egg unboiler. He's really close to getting it finished. Its gonna be great, just you wait It was worth the wait 
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Apr 30, 2015 22:45
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The other troll bit in Earthbound that stands out in my mind (probably due to my best friend growing up having really bad ADHD) is the waterfall password where you're forced to just put the controller down and wait for several minutes. The game really seems to like to spawn a magic butterfly during the wait too, so you're stuck just sitting there with essentially a full heal just out of reach. Also that abandoned house that you can buy for an obscene amount of money just for a photo op and the ability to read a short story by Itoi.
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Apr 30, 2015 22:46
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If we're going to bring up early access games then I'd love to bring up Godus. I wasn't involved in the Kickstarter but saw it on Steam and invested early on after the Kickstarter ended. Which was just after things went to poo poo and they spent months in silence when they tried re-vamping the game. Then after the re-vamp and updating the game, they leave it alone and decide to concentrate their time on a free mobile application with a pay to win aspect, then afterwards have used their time in making the PC version in the same format. So what I bought two years ago has been turned into a glorified mobile application game that doesn't actually advance but only changes what they've already implemented. "We've updated, so delete your save and start again." "We've changed that update, delete the saves again and restart." "Our mobile app has just started, delete the saves again so you can be part of it. Even though it makes us restrict your game even further." "We've got nothing new to offer you a year later, it's still a restricted and incomplete mess and eighteen months on you still have to 'Ctrl+Alt+Del' to even quit the game. But thanks for the money." It's not stopped me from investing in early access games, but so far this has been the worst experience. All others have been a joy in seeing things as they develop. But Godus, it's been a train wreck since I even touched it.
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May 1, 2015 01:06
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bucketmouse posted:The other troll bit in Earthbound that stands out in my mind (probably due to my best friend growing up having really bad ADHD) is the waterfall password where you're forced to just put the controller down and wait for several minutes. The game really seems to like to spawn a magic butterfly during the wait too, so you're stuck just sitting there with essentially a full heal just out of reach. There's also the part where you first play as Poo. You have to pass your training by meditating, which is completely counter-intuitive and fourth-wall breaking in that it means ignoring characters instructing you to do things and instead just stand still for like a minute. Earthbound is a great game but there's a reason it came with a player's guide bundled with every copy.
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May 1, 2015 01:17
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Rocket Baby Dolls posted:If we're going to bring up early access games then I'd love to bring up Godus. I wasn't involved in the Kickstarter but saw it on Steam and invested early on after the Kickstarter ended. Which was just after things went to poo poo and they spent months in silence when they tried re-vamping the game. Then after the re-vamp and updating the game, they leave it alone and decide to concentrate their time on a free mobile application with a pay to win aspect, then afterwards have used their time in making the PC version in the same format. So what I bought two years ago has been turned into a glorified mobile application game that doesn't actually advance but only changes what they've already implemented. "We've updated, so delete your save and start again." "We've changed that update, delete the saves again and restart." "Our mobile app has just started, delete the saves again so you can be part of it. Even though it makes us restrict your game even further." "We've got nothing new to offer you a year later, it's still a restricted and incomplete mess and eighteen months on you still have to 'Ctrl+Alt+Del' to even quit the game. But thanks for the money." Your problem is calling buying an early access game 'investing'. It's just buying a game earlier than usual, in an unfinished state.
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May 1, 2015 01:43
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Not to mention that's far from the worst thing done in the name of Godus.
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May 1, 2015 02:43
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I'm still not sure if Molyneux is just a really good conman or is delusional enough to actually believe the stuff he promises. Ironically he may be trolling himself.
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May 1, 2015 06:40
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Rocket Baby Dolls posted:If we're going to bring up early access games then I'd love to bring up Godus. I wasn't involved in the Kickstarter but saw it on Steam and invested early on after the Kickstarter ended. Which was just after things went to poo poo and they spent months in silence when they tried re-vamping the game. Then after the re-vamp and updating the game, they leave it alone and decide to concentrate their time on a free mobile application with a pay to win aspect, then afterwards have used their time in making the PC version in the same format. So what I bought two years ago has been turned into a glorified mobile application game that doesn't actually advance but only changes what they've already implemented. "We've updated, so delete your save and start again." "We've changed that update, delete the saves again and restart." "Our mobile app has just started, delete the saves again so you can be part of it. Even though it makes us restrict your game even further." "We've got nothing new to offer you a year later, it's still a restricted and incomplete mess and eighteen months on you still have to 'Ctrl+Alt+Del' to even quit the game. But thanks for the money." Godus was the first and last Early Access game that I ever bought. Totally turned me off both early access games and Molyneux.
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May 1, 2015 06:47
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Internet Kraken posted:I'm still not sure if Molyneux is just a really good conman or is delusional enough to actually believe the stuff he promises. Ironically he may be trolling himself. From interviews he's done it seems like he's kind of in between, in that he generally thinks the things he promotes are going to come to fruition in some fashion but he also knowingly hypes them beyond that to build a buzz. He also seems confused as to why that's a weird position to hold so yeah he's basically trolling himself
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May 1, 2015 06:58
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I don't get why people get so angry about early access games but on the few early access games I have bought I haven't really gotten burned. I'll be over here with my prison architect and kerbal space program, thank you.
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May 1, 2015 07:55
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Sleeveless posted:There's also the part where you first play as Poo. You have to pass your training by meditating, which is completely counter-intuitive and fourth-wall breaking in that it means ignoring characters instructing you to do things and instead just stand still for like a minute.
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May 1, 2015 08:56
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Sleeveless posted:There's also the part where you first play as Poo. You have to pass your training by meditating, which is completely counter-intuitive and fourth-wall breaking in that it means ignoring characters instructing you to do things and instead just stand still for like a minute. Didn't Poo's only weapon drop from a Starman enemy that appeared in exactly one dungeon in the game, but with an insanely low drop rate? I think the other enemies in the area were the 'detonate upon death' kinds, and if you didn't get it there, the lab is inaccessible after the boss fight, so there went your once chance to get his sword.
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May 1, 2015 09:15
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Or those mushrooms in Super Mario Bros. 2 (the Japanese one) that kill you but look almost exactly like the regular ones - Dick. Move.
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May 1, 2015 09:21
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My Lovely Horse posted:Or those mushrooms in Super Mario Bros. 2 (the Japanese one) that kill you but look almost exactly like the regular ones - Dick. Move. They're easy to tell apart in that game, but not in the Super Smash Bros. series. They're just a tiny shade darker, and have angry eyes instead.
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May 1, 2015 09:59
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Lord Lambeth posted:I don't get why people get so angry about early access games but on the few early access games I have bought I haven't really gotten burned. I'll be over here with my prison architect and kerbal space program, thank you. It mainly comes down to a couple of issues, when devs start selling the game when its completely busted/has no content (like Godus) and when they announce that they're basically not finishing the game because not enough people bought it (like Godus.)
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May 1, 2015 12:19
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That loving Sned posted:They're easy to tell apart in that game, but not in the Super Smash Bros. series. They're just a tiny shade darker, and have angry eyes instead. Pretty sure that's how the poison mushrooms looked in the Japanese version. The American one had them with purple caps with a skull and crossbones on them, making them much easier to differentiate.
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May 1, 2015 13:34
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LadyPictureShow posted:Didn't Poo's only weapon drop from a Starman enemy that appeared in exactly one dungeon in the game, but with an insanely low drop rate? I think the other enemies in the area were the 'detonate upon death' kinds, and if you didn't get it there, the lab is inaccessible after the boss fight, so there went your once chance to get his sword. There are a few items like that. One of Ness' bats can be dropped only by one enemy (I think they also appear on, like, one screen) in the final dungeon. Big Grunty Secret posted:Pretty sure that's how the poison mushrooms looked in the Japanese version. The American one had them with purple caps with a skull and crossbones on them, making them much easier to differentiate.
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May 1, 2015 15:19
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Vookatos posted:There are a few items like that. One of Ness' bats can be dropped only by one enemy (I think they also appear on, like, one screen) in the final dungeon. The real troll here is the guide the game comes with has the WRONG INFO about this and instead tells you it drops from an enemy you can fight like maybe three or four times max and then have to reload a save to try again including walking all the way back to that screen so you waste a bunch of time on something that's actually impossible.
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May 1, 2015 15:33
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Light Gun Man posted:The real troll here is the guide the game comes with has the WRONG INFO about this and instead tells you it drops from an enemy you can fight like maybe three or four times max and then have to reload a save to try again including walking all the way back to that screen so you waste a bunch of time on something that's actually impossible. More guide-related trolling: The Official Strategy Guide for Final Fantasy IX was the book that ended my guide collecting days. On every page there's a comment in the margin advising the reader that if they wanted more information on a boss, area, character, item, whatever, that they could go online, type in a five or six digit code, and get a little extra blurb. It defeated the purpose of buying the guide, since getting on the computer wasn't something that was always available to me and if it was I could get the information from GameFAQs instead. Unrelated: I really wish I still had my Unofficial Guide for Final Fantasy VII. It was funny, informative, and comprehensive. In the character section there were photos of what each weapon looked like in battle, and for Red XIII it was just the same photo over and over again. That was fine, but there was a bit of fine print from the writer chiding the reader for expecting something else, like he was going to draw them in. It also came with a poster that was taken from me by a teacher because Tifa's boobs were too suggestive, and I ultimately lent the guide to a senior who I never saw again.
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May 1, 2015 15:58
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Yeah, Square really screwed the pooch with that FFIX guide. I was in my first year living in college at the time, and my room didn't have a computer in it. I had to go walk all the way across campus and down to the library if I wanted to look anything up for the game, and there were also zero illustrations on their online guide as well. They corrected the mistake with X and went back to the old ways of just having a comprehensive colorful book. My FFVII guide book was funny because it was based on a beta of the game, and had a handful of errors in it. Like it still included the Test-0 dogs down in the Corel Prison well, and had different rewards for Ruby and Emerald.
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May 1, 2015 16:04
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I don't know if they're still garbage or not, but a few of the older Prima guides I had were absolute poo poo. I remember using one for one of those Megaman Legends games and often I would find items not marked on the guide, there would be items marked that didn't exist, and the items that did exist in places marked were often different items. Just a clusterfuck as a whole.
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May 1, 2015 16:20
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LadyPictureShow posted:Didn't Poo's only weapon drop from a Starman enemy that appeared in exactly one dungeon in the game, but with an insanely low drop rate? I think the other enemies in the area were the 'detonate upon death' kinds, and if you didn't get it there, the lab is inaccessible after the boss fight, so there went your once chance to get his sword. Yup 1/256 chance. And if you max level trying to get it before they disappear, then you gimp yourself. You lose a huge stat bonus that happens later.
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May 1, 2015 16:23
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I think my worst guide I ever bought was the Prima book for Lunar: Silver Star Story Complete. All the maps were hand drawn and only vaguely correct (including enemy placement). Like, it was painfully obvious they couldn't get the rights to print any images from the game in the book. It was awful.
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May 1, 2015 16:32
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The Tactics Ogre for PSX guide was garbage. Whoever made all the screenshots just hacked the game to make the main character level 50, and they left out the fact that you can save a certain character and get a completely different ending. Also, they didn't mention the gigantic hidden dungeon at all.
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May 1, 2015 16:53
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