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Calls in an airstrike gets a big ol boner
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:26 |
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# ? Apr 27, 2024 17:46 |
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*be 17 years old* *time for the ritual* *now I'm in community college and one hand is very large*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:26 |
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RideTheSpiral posted:*travels 1600 miles on holiday* gently caress'n a. The USA is like 15 different countries all wrapped up under Obamacare. It's pretty sweet.
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:34 |
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I love geese, and I am friends with many geese. I am the modern American. I vote in elections and go to the store. On Tuesdays we all play badminton and discuss rabbit breeds.
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:36 |
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*watches high school football*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:38 |
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I met an American friend of mine when she was visiting London (also a terrible place but beside the point). She was complaining that since arriving she'd only been hearing American music on the radio and seeing American television. I was like "welcome to the rest of the world lol. we put up with this every day" She also spoke with a fake English accent the entire time and would force conversations with strangers to demonstrate how English she was. I mentioned it within the first 60 seconds of speaking to her and she avoided talking about it.
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:41 |
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* Turns iraq in to a -worse- hellhole. national hero* *cheats on wife. Forced to resign *
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:41 |
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RideTheSpiral posted:TIME TO GO ON HOLIDAY KIDS when your biggest tourist attraction in the country is a loving ferris wheel then yes you leave the country to go ~on holiday~ Schweinhund fucked around with this message at 13:44 on Sep 30, 2015 |
# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:42 |
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*pronounces "grocery" with a hard k sound*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:42 |
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*wraps thanksgiving turkey in aloooooooominum foil*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:45 |
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I, the American people, love fireworks. However, I fear thunder. Is this the paradox that drives American life? It is.
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:47 |
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*Doesn't know what the h in Herbs is used for*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:55 |
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Booblord Zagats posted:Calls in an airstrike *watches Russia call in an airstrike* * gets all in their head *
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:58 |
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*first country into space* *last country into space* *galactic hivemind descended from what was once humanity*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 13:58 |
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*appreciates his large, circumcised penis every day*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:00 |
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*Complains about the poor being lazy drug addicts while snorting cocaine.*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:01 |
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Chinatown posted:*appreciates his large, circumcised penis every day*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:02 |
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*emerges from the ground once every 17 years to smuggle maple syrup back from Canada*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:02 |
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overtly celebrates freedom, but only if there's no police watching.
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:06 |
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*drinks lovely beer out of a tiny can*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:08 |
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*Buys a $300 machine for the privilege of paying $1.25 for each glass of soda*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:12 |
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*lives in house 10 miles away from nearest shop*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:12 |
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Hey everyone I just found this cool stick. I think I might use it to make something. Or maybe I will throw it for my dog to grab and bring back and it will be like a fun game. Hey maybe I can do both. Yeah, I think I will do that, what do you think Rufus? Good boy. *goes home after playing with his dog in the park* *puts the stick on his mantle place and makes a cup of coffee*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:13 |
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*speaking Chinese* *living in China* *born there in China to Chinese parents*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:14 |
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*spends one quarter of earnings on gas because all jobs are far away and public transportation keeps striking or doesn't exist*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:14 |
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RideTheSpiral posted:*lives in house 10 miles away from nearest shop* please stop spying on me op
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:15 |
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*Looks at the lovely landscape and smiles* drat, this is some good coffee! *starts thinking of cool things they can make with the stick* Yeah I think I might go to the hardware tomorrow and pick up some tools so I can start making something out of that stick!
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:17 |
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allahu akbar!
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:20 |
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tetsuo posted:*posts anything positive about america on internet*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:21 |
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hmm i sure am thirsty *goes to coffee shop and orders drink that barely resembles coffee* yep i love coffee
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:21 |
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RideTheSpiral posted:hmm i sure am thirsty lol if u drink cofffee to quench your thirst
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:25 |
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*puts steak on grill and cooks for 40 minutes* who ordered medium rare?
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:25 |
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*lives inside a hole and only comes out at night* *steals from the big people* *doesn't believe in a world outside the house*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:27 |
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*never criticizes the armed forces regardless of political stance*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:29 |
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*Doesn't know how to grill a steak over a wood fire, throws a burger on the gas instead*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:32 |
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pro captial punishment / anti abortion / pro jesus / anti poor.
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:55 |
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*goes from AC house to AC office via AC car* *lives within driving distance of a national park* *watches documentaries about wildlife on big rear end TV instead*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:56 |
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ReagaNOMNOMicks posted:*goes from AC house to AC office via AC car* *owns X acres of land.* *0.99 times X is size of house.*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:57 |
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Jim Flatline posted:SURE IS JIM DANDY HAVING NO WORKERS RIGHTS AND BEING FIRED ON A WHIM WITH NO WARNING BOY HOWDY
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:57 |
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# ? Apr 27, 2024 17:46 |
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*plays "dueling banjos"*
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# ? Sep 30, 2015 14:58 |