Schadenfreude Thread: What did they think would happen?

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kazil: Jul 24, 2005; Derpmph trial star reporter!

crime fighting hog posted:

Should I feel bad that most of this poo poo is complete word salad to me

Let me translate

"I want to be able to say friend of the family with no consequences!"

# ? Oct 26, 2015 21:26

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# ? May 16, 2024 14:56

captainOrbital: Jan 23, 2003; Wrathchild!
💢🧒

kazil posted:

autist advocates

They are not advocates; they prefer death to autism. Death for thousands and thousands of children.

# ? Oct 26, 2015 21:31

canyoneer: Sep 13, 2005; I only have canyoneyes for you

Railing Kill posted:

Then again, the videos of kids getting their faces slammed into cake bug the poo poo out of me. Not because it's cruel (which is arguable I guess), but because it isn't funny. It's not clever. It's loving retarded.

That's a thing in Latino birthday parties, so in at least one culture (and probably a few of the videos) it's not considered cruel.

# ? Oct 26, 2015 21:31

wayfinder: Jul 7, 2003

Good news from the Netherlands: http://bluebelldigital.co.uk/eastgrinsteadonline/2015/10/23/dutch-court-revokes-scientologys-tax-exempt-status/

# ? Oct 26, 2015 21:40

ElGroucho: Nov 1, 2005; We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane; Fun Shoe

canyoneer posted:

That's a thing in Latino birthday parties, so in at least one culture (and probably a few of the videos) it's not considered cruel.

If you are a Mexican kid and haven't had a faceful of cake, you must be one of these weird rear end mexican families that claims to be Spaniard, unlike those commoner browns

# ? Oct 26, 2015 21:45

MariusLecter: Sep 5, 2009; NI MUERTE NI MIEDO

Seriously.

If you're not prepared for the face in the cake, you should be culled.

# ? Oct 26, 2015 21:55

Roro: Oct 9, 2012; HOO'S HEAD GOES ALL THE WAY AROUND?

captainOrbital posted:

They are not advocates; they prefer death to autism. Death for thousands and thousands of children.

"Well those children obviously weren't as strong as my little la- oh god why are they bleeding from every orifice??"

# ? Oct 26, 2015 22:08

Dillbag: Mar 4, 2007; Click here to join Lem Lee in the Hell Of Being Cut To Pieces; Nap Ghost

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_X6VoFBCE9k

# ? Oct 26, 2015 22:19

Roro: Oct 9, 2012; HOO'S HEAD GOES ALL THE WAY AROUND?

http://now8news.com/woman-shoots-veterinarian-after-he-refuses-to-do-sex-re-assignment-surgery-on-her-dog/
:allears:

Somebody here needs help, and it's not her dog... It's the vet!

# ? Oct 26, 2015 22:49

LordSaturn: Aug 12, 2007; sadly unfunny

Roro posted:

http://now8news.com/woman-shoots-veterinarian-after-he-refuses-to-do-sex-re-assignment-surgery-on-her-dog/
Somebody here needs help, and it's not her dog... It's the vet!

I don't think now8news is legit. Most of their stories are "funny mug shot + gross-out story" except for one about this: http://www.snopes.com/politics/satire/marlboro.asp

# ? Oct 26, 2015 22:57

YeahTubaMike: Mar 24, 2005; *hic* Gotta finish thish . . .; Doctor Rope

Scyantific posted:

Link or it didn't happen.

It was posted by a non-friend on a friend's wall weeks ago, and I don't remember who that friend was, so it's basically impossible for me to find. I tried though :shobon:

syscall girl posted:

Seriously, name a good yellow candy.

Yellow Starbursts are the best ones.

# ? Oct 26, 2015 22:57

Roro: Oct 9, 2012; HOO'S HEAD GOES ALL THE WAY AROUND?

LordSaturn posted:

I don't think now8news is legit. Most of their stories are "funny mug shot + gross-out story" except for one about this: http://www.snopes.com/politics/satire/marlboro.asp

I want to believe!

# ? Oct 26, 2015 23:06

A Bug: Nov 26, 2008; MOM GET THE CAMERA!

syscall girl posted:

Seriously, name a good yellow candy.

Banana Laffy taffy.

# ? Oct 26, 2015 23:09

PERMACAV 50: Jul 24, 2007; because we are cat

YeahTubaMike posted:

Yellow Starbursts are the best ones.

You've never had a red or pink one in your life, have you.

# ? Oct 26, 2015 23:25

I brought my Drake: Jul 10, 2014; These high-G injections have some serious side effects after pulling so many jumps.

YeahTubaMike posted:

Yellow Starbursts are the best ones.

The pineapple ones in tropical Starbursts are even better.

Ever been to a birthday party where the icing is actually lard? Or shaving cream? That's the childhood destroying prank I remember.

# ? Oct 26, 2015 23:35

Apogee15: Jun 16, 2013

Sex Hobbit posted:

You've never had a red or pink one in your life, have you.

What do you mean? Yellows are far superior to red AND pink. Pink might be close, but red? no way.

# ? Oct 26, 2015 23:40

mind the walrus: Sep 22, 2006

queserasera posted:

Ever been to a birthday party where the icing is actually lard? Or shaving cream? That's the childhood destroying prank I remember.

Just fondant :smith:

# ? Oct 27, 2015 00:07

Nuclear Pogostick: Apr 9, 2007; Bouncing towards victory

Apogee15 posted:

What do you mean? Yellows are far superior to red AND pink. Pink might be close, but red? no way.

How's it feel to be completely wrong? Lemon is poo poo compared to cherry and strawberry.

# ? Oct 27, 2015 00:21

Ride The Gravitron: May 2, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22ec8o7p2bI

# ? Oct 27, 2015 00:34

Sam Faust: Feb 20, 2015

All the recent fun talk has reminded me of this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NDkVx9AzSY

# ? Oct 27, 2015 01:12

Bip Roberts: Mar 29, 2005

When I live Scotland we watched the PSA where the kid got his football cleats stuck in the train tracks then the train cut off his arms and legs.

# ? Oct 27, 2015 01:18

Astrobastard: Dec 31, 2008; Winky Face

Some of those wedding ones are amazing

# ? Oct 27, 2015 01:23

Brainamp: Sep 4, 2011; More Zen than Zenyatta

I get the balloons, but what the hell is making the the guy's shirt ignite in the second one?

# ? Oct 27, 2015 01:28

Lurking Haro: Oct 27, 2009

Brainamp posted:

I get the balloons, but what the hell is making the the guy's shirt ignite in the second one?

The candle right next to him.

# ? Oct 27, 2015 01:30

Handiklap: Aug 14, 2004; Mmmm no.

The ineffectual pat on the back by the bridesmaid has me loving dying over here. "Good job, you put yourself out!"

# ? Oct 27, 2015 01:42

pookerbug: Jan 21, 2006; the vitreous humourist

Astrobastard posted:

The hell? Did they fill those with loving hydrogen?

# ? Oct 27, 2015 01:45

Imagined: Feb 2, 2007

Cage posted:

Lemonheads are terrible, you jerks.

I WILL FIGHT YOU.

I love lemonheads..

# ? Oct 27, 2015 02:33

Bip Roberts: Mar 29, 2005

Edit; Way wrong thread.

# ? Oct 27, 2015 02:34

syscall girl: Nov 7, 2009; by FactsAreUseless; Fun Shoe

Imagined posted:

I WILL FIGHT YOU.

I love lemonheads..

Truly delectable. Like candy cigarettes or necco wafers.

# ? Oct 27, 2015 02:40

Zamboni Rodeo: Jul 19, 2007; NEVER play "Lady of Spain" AGAIN!

Apogee15 posted:

What do you mean? Yellows are far superior to red AND pink. Pink might be close, but red? no way.

Hell yes. Also, yellow Skittles (the original flavor).

# ? Oct 27, 2015 02:42

Crow Jane: Oct 18, 2012; nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

Yellow Skittles and Starburst are okay, but any points they may score for yellow candy being not completely terrible are more than made up for by the horrors that are Peeps and anything that uses that horrible artificial banana flavor.

# ? Oct 27, 2015 02:47

dont be mean to me: May 2, 2007; I'm interplanetary, bitch
Let's go to Mars

syscall girl posted:

Seriously, name a good yellow candy.

Lemonheads. :colbert:

# ? Oct 27, 2015 02:50

AlphaKretin: Dec 25, 2014; A vase to face encounter.

...Vase to meet you?

...

GARVASE DAY!

Well clearly yellow sweets can't be very good at all if they're relevant to the schadenfreude thread. :colbert:

_{It's not}

For content:

(tell me if this counts as image leeching, I know the host and have permission)

# ? Oct 27, 2015 02:56

-Zydeco-: Nov 12, 2007

2015 Batsu game. For people unfamiliar, five comedians are put in a wierd situation for 24 hours. If they laugh at any point they are punished by various means. Of course everything is designed to get them to laugh.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yx6Xy18-aeA

# ? Oct 27, 2015 02:56

Snowglobe of Doom: Mar 30, 2012; sucks to be right

YeahTubaMike posted:

I saw the video for this on Facebook and the kid pretty much immediately starts screaming at the top of his lungs.

Scyantific posted:

Link or it didn't happen.

Here ya go
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xosUjZgIzrs
The original was apparently a vine and the scream sounds edited in to me but who knows? :shrug:

They should have PSAs about exercise balls, they'll gently caress you up
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-RRVdEhm_o
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xftdgXU3DA

Snowglobe of Doom has a new favorite as of 03:20 on Oct 27, 2015

# ? Oct 27, 2015 03:08

KoRMaK: Jul 31, 2012

Samfucius posted:

My step mom got me pokemon red for Christmas way back in the day, but she didn't want the box to be too obvious, so she put it in a Ritz crackers box before she wrapped it.

I thanked her very nicely for the crackers, because I'm a normal person, I could handle a disappointing gift like that, and Ritz are actually delicious. I did not break down, and actually thought it was really funny once I figured it out.

Kids are okay with jokes, even from "authority" you dorks.

A child is not a normal person,. they are a loving child.

A normal person doesn't develop until like 25.

The rest of what you said may be correct, but this distinction I had to make.

# ? Oct 27, 2015 03:14

Railing Kill: Nov 14, 2008; You are the first crack in the sheer face of god. From you it will spread.

canyoneer posted:

That's a thing in Latino birthday parties, so in at least one culture (and probably a few of the videos) it's not considered cruel.

Huh. Alright then. If it's expected then I'm cool with it. The impression I got from some of the videos I've seen are that the kid is completely blind-sided by it, but others aren't so bad and the kid seems to be in on the joke. Where I'm from, the only situation I can think of to expect cake in the face is the bride and groom of a wedding.

# ? Oct 27, 2015 03:26