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Sumo


if you can

ADBOT LOVES YOU

Maradonna Summer

Our love will last forever

JD: Wanna have sex?
Girl: Not in a million years.
JD: Drats! Not again!!!!!

Kauka


[19:49] SAbabyhobo: RUUUSSSSSSSSSS
[19:49] MasterpieceRuss: YES! HI THER! BABY HOBO!
[19:50] SAbabyhobo: russ how did you get the comedy goldmine position
[19:50] MasterpieceRuss: I PMED LOWTEXT EVERY DAY
[19:50] MasterpieceRuss: AND I SAID "LOWTEXT GIVE ME A JOB"
[19:50] MasterpieceRuss: AND ONE DAY HE DID
[19:50] SAbabyhobo: i PMed lowtax about it and he never even replied
[19:51] SAbabyhobo: should i PM lowtax
[19:51] SAbabyhobo: and tell him to give me a job
[19:51] SAbabyhobo: like you did
[19:51] MasterpieceRuss: YOU SHOULD DO IT AND WRITE A FUNNY SAMPLE ARTICLE FOR HIM TO READ
[19:51] MasterpieceRuss: I WROTE A FUNNY REVIEW OF THE MOVIE SPACE JAM
[19:52] SAbabyhobo: OH
[19:52] SAbabyhobo: HOLD ON I WILL SHOW YOU WHAT I WROTE TO HIM OK
[19:53] SAbabyhobo: Dear MR. RICHARD "LOWTAX" KYAKA,

Good day or evening to you, SIR! My name is Spencer, also known on the "Something Awful" forums as BABY HOBO. Whilst perusingsaid FORUMS (as I often like to do while waiting for my macaroni and cheese to finish cooling off -- You see, I have a condition where Icannot eat hot macaroni and cheese -- I inherited it from mygrandmother), I happened upon a "thread" that informed me that you, MR.RICARD "LOWTAX" KYANKA, are looking for a new writer for the "ComedyGoldmine" feature on your website "Something Awful.com!"

I wish to apply for this position, MR. RICHARD "LOWAX" KYANKA. I am afine writer who has been a consistent source of humor for over THREEMONTHS now. I have written a variety of articles, such as:

"How to Toilet Train your Parakeet" - Proud Parakeet Magazine, June 2006

"The Lava Lamp: Friend to Hippies or Tool for Communism?" - Political Stoner Monthly, February 2004

"Where You Left Your Keys" - Where Did I Leave My Keys Weekly, January 2005 (EMMY AWARD WINNING ARTICLE)

I trust that you will find me to be a worthy candidate for thisposition. I am a hard worker, made strong by the many years I worked inthe coal mines of Southern Michigan. I will stand by your side,cackling maniacally as we, together, rule the forbidden and unchartedterrain that is "The Internet."

Thank you for your time, MR. RONALD "LOWTAX" MCYANKA, I eagerly await your reply.

Love,
Spencer
[19:53] SAbabyhobo: i don't know why the formatting is hosed up it is not like that in the PM
[19:54] MasterpieceRuss: THIS MADE ME GIGGLE!!! TWICE!!! MAYBE HE WILL GET BACK TO YOU SOON! GOOD LUCK!!
[19:54] SAbabyhobo: HE DID NOT
[19:54] SAbabyhobo: I SEND THAT ON THE 24TH OF FEBRUARY
[19:55] MasterpieceRuss: THERE IS STILL TIME
[19:56] SAbabyhobo: NO THERE IS NOT YOU ALREADY GOT THE POSITION
[19:56] SAbabyhobo: SIR
[19:56] SAbabyhobo: and you are better than i could ever be

hey! Hermano

by Lowtax

Kauka posted:

[19:49] SAbabyhobo: RUUUSSSSSSSSSS
[19:49] MasterpieceRuss: YES! HI THER! BABY HOBO!
[19:50] SAbabyhobo: russ how did you get the comedy goldmine position
[19:50] MasterpieceRuss: I PMED LOWTEXT EVERY DAY
[19:50] MasterpieceRuss: AND I SAID "LOWTEXT GIVE ME A JOB"
[19:50] MasterpieceRuss: AND ONE DAY HE DID
[19:50] SAbabyhobo: i PMed lowtax about it and he never even replied
[19:51] SAbabyhobo: should i PM lowtax
[19:51] SAbabyhobo: and tell him to give me a job
[19:51] SAbabyhobo: like you did
[19:51] MasterpieceRuss: YOU SHOULD DO IT AND WRITE A FUNNY SAMPLE ARTICLE FOR HIM TO READ
[19:51] MasterpieceRuss: I WROTE A FUNNY REVIEW OF THE MOVIE SPACE JAM
[19:52] SAbabyhobo: OH
[19:52] SAbabyhobo: HOLD ON I WILL SHOW YOU WHAT I WROTE TO HIM OK
[19:53] SAbabyhobo: Dear MR. RICHARD "LOWTAX" KYAKA,

Good day or evening to you, SIR! My name is Spencer, also known on the "Something Awful" forums as BABY HOBO. Whilst perusingsaid FORUMS (as I often like to do while waiting for my macaroni and cheese to finish cooling off -- You see, I have a condition where Icannot eat hot macaroni and cheese -- I inherited it from mygrandmother), I happened upon a "thread" that informed me that you, MR.RICARD "LOWTAX" KYANKA, are looking for a new writer for the "ComedyGoldmine" feature on your website "Something Awful.com!"

I wish to apply for this position, MR. RICHARD "LOWAX" KYANKA. I am afine writer who has been a consistent source of humor for over THREEMONTHS now. I have written a variety of articles, such as:

"How to Toilet Train your Parakeet" - Proud Parakeet Magazine, June 2006

"The Lava Lamp: Friend to Hippies or Tool for Communism?" - Political Stoner Monthly, February 2004

"Where You Left Your Keys" - Where Did I Leave My Keys Weekly, January 2005 (EMMY AWARD WINNING ARTICLE)

I trust that you will find me to be a worthy candidate for thisposition. I am a hard worker, made strong by the many years I worked inthe coal mines of Southern Michigan. I will stand by your side,cackling maniacally as we, together, rule the forbidden and unchartedterrain that is "The Internet."

Thank you for your time, MR. RONALD "LOWTAX" MCYANKA, I eagerly await your reply.

Love,
Spencer
[19:53] SAbabyhobo: i don't know why the formatting is hosed up it is not like that in the PM
[19:54] MasterpieceRuss: THIS MADE ME GIGGLE!!! TWICE!!! MAYBE HE WILL GET BACK TO YOU SOON! GOOD LUCK!!
[19:54] SAbabyhobo: HE DID NOT
[19:54] SAbabyhobo: I SEND THAT ON THE 24TH OF FEBRUARY
[19:55] MasterpieceRuss: THERE IS STILL TIME
[19:56] SAbabyhobo: NO THERE IS NOT YOU ALREADY GOT THE POSITION
[19:56] SAbabyhobo: SIR
[19:56] SAbabyhobo: and you are better than i could ever be

marge

by T. Fine

hoping to see muy first funny chat log itt

Friggle

by Fragmaster

exilechamp

Sumo


[19:49] : RUUUSSSSSSSSSS
[19:49] : YES! HI THER! BABY HOBO!
[19:50] : russ how did you get the comedy goldmine position
[19:50] : I PMED LOWTEXT EVERY DAY
[19:50] : AND I SAID "LOWTEXT GIVE ME A JOB"
[19:50] : AND ONE DAY HE DID
[19:50] : i PMed lowtax about it and he never even replied
[19:51] : should i PM lowtax
[19:51] : and tell him to give me a job
[19:51] : like you did
[19:51] : YOU SHOULD DO IT AND WRITE A FUNNY SAMPLE ARTICLE FOR HIM TO READ
[19:51] : I WROTE A FUNNY REVIEW OF THE MOVIE SPACE JAM
[19:52] : OH
[19:52] : HOLD ON I WILL SHOW YOU WHAT I WROTE TO HIM OK
[19:53] : Dear MR. RICHARD "LOWTAX" KYAKA,

Good day or evening to you, SIR! My name is Spencer, also known on the "Something Awful" forums as BABY HOBO. Whilst perusingsaid FORUMS (as I often like to do while waiting for my macaroni and cheese to finish cooling off -- You see, I have a condition where Icannot eat hot macaroni and cheese -- I inherited it from mygrandmother), I happened upon a "thread" that informed me that you, MR.RICARD "LOWTAX" KYANKA, are looking for a new writer for the "ComedyGoldmine" feature on your website "Something Awful.com!"

I wish to apply for this position, MR. RICHARD "LOWAX" KYANKA. I am afine writer who has been a consistent source of humor for over THREEMONTHS now. I have written a variety of articles, such as:

"How to Toilet Train your Parakeet" - Proud Parakeet Magazine, June 2006

"The Lava Lamp: Friend to Hippies or Tool for Communism?" - Political Stoner Monthly, February 2004

"Where You Left Your Keys" - Where Did I Leave My Keys Weekly, January 2005 (EMMY AWARD WINNING ARTICLE)

I trust that you will find me to be a worthy candidate for thisposition. I am a hard worker, made strong by the many years I worked inthe coal mines of Southern Michigan. I will stand by your side,cackling maniacally as we, together, rule the forbidden and unchartedterrain that is "The Internet."

Thank you for your time, MR. RONALD "LOWTAX" MCYANKA, I eagerly await your reply.

Love,
Spencer
[19:53] : i don't know why the formatting is hosed up it is not like that in the PM
[19:54] : THIS MADE ME GIGGLE!!! TWICE!!! MAYBE HE WILL GET BACK TO YOU SOON! GOOD LUCK!!
[19:54] : HE DID NOT
[19:54] : I SEND THAT ON THE 24TH OF FEBRUARY
[19:55] : THERE IS STILL TIME
[19:56] : NO THERE IS NOT YOU ALREADY GOT THE POSITION
[19:56] : SIR
[19:56] : and you are better than i could ever be

tyrone shoelaces


lol

Maradonna Summer

Our love will last forever

5

A Curvy Goonette

Vavao lenei pua'i fou pulou tama'i gosi :3


5

Scarf

Hello.

hahahhahaha how delightfully absurd

CuteAwesumArtist

by Fragmaster

LOLLOTASTIC

seriously though that was good

hey! Hermano

by Lowtax

This is what B.Y.O.B. is all about.

69 WITH OPRAH

by Danny Manic

o my gord

Kauka


Heh. That made me giggle. Twice.

notagoon

by angerbotSD

haha that is awesome i 5

Maradonna Summer

Our love will last forever

a peasant approaches bush with a baby. another woman follows.

peasant 1: oh, W., wise W., this is my child and i wish to be relieved of this womans nagging *gestures to peasant 2*

peasant 2 * aww hell naw you lil skinny white bitch that babby brown like a mochoa u know he mine

President Bush: heh, hey Rummy, hand me that sword. *donald obeys*

*readies sword and slices baby in two*

President Bush: "I HAVE KILLED ONE OF MY OWN CITIZENS. TREMBLE IRAQ. SEE WHAT IM CAPABLE OF. TREMBLE IN YOUR SAND MOCCASSINS AND RUN TO YOUR SECRET CAVERNS. I WILL BURN YOUR LAND AND KILL ONE MILLION OF YOUR CHILDREN TO MAKE UP FOR THIS POOR AMERICAN SOUL! NO LONGER SHALL I BE MOCKED. I AM YOUR NEW GOD."

A Curvy Goonette

Vavao lenei pua'i fou pulou tama'i gosi :3


glodmine

slackingest

mosfet.swf

that dog is everything i imagined baby hobo to be

Kauka


cat scratch achiever posted:

a peasant approaches bush with a baby. another woman follows.

this is a matt damon quote

Maradonna Summer

Our love will last forever

irregardless I wanna see it reenacted by dogs.

Kauka


alas, so do i

hey! Hermano

by Lowtax

theres not much i dont want to reenacted by dogs

Plastic Innards

haha those dogs are on computers!

Sumo


[22:34] : Wanna have sex?
[22:34] : Not in a million years.
[22:35] : Drats! Not again!!!!!

Maradonna Summer

Our love will last forever

that's just how i picture you ;__;

Bicycle SexFucker

I have zero interest in marriage.

5

and more

Scarf

Hello.

lol @ trying to score w/ a WEINER dog!

notagoon

by angerbotSD

haha

hey! Hermano

by Lowtax

lol

Maradonna Summer

Our love will last forever

3toes posted:

lol @ trying to score w/ a WEINER dog!

all dogs on the internet are weiner dogs

CuteAwesumArtist

by Fragmaster

GOLDMINE NOW! STOP EVERYTHING IN ITS TRACKS AND GOLDMINE IT CLOSE THREAD AND GOLDMINE!!!!

CuteAwesumArtist

by Fragmaster

this thread is very good please continue!

Sumo


Awaiting chat logs...

Maradonna Summer

Our love will last forever

stephpjr@gmail.com (8:54:32 PM): how often can you get high without becoming a stoner
cravencravin (8:54:41 PM): twice a week tops
cravencravin (8:54:46 PM): doesn't matter how much you smoke
cravencravin (8:54:51 PM): but two days and that's it
cravencravin (8:54:54 PM): more than that and you're a stoner
stephpjr@gmail.com (8:55:09 PM): no but i mean when do you start talking like one

Kauka


Speth: im crying i put on spice girls' "mama" while i was high
Speth: it becomes much more real

Sumo


(8:54:32 PM): how often can you get high without becoming a stoner
(8:54:41 PM): twice a week tops
(8:54:46 PM): doesn't matter how much you smoke
(8:54:51 PM): but two days and that's it
(8:54:54 PM): more than that and you're a stoner
(8:55:09 PM): no but i mean when do you start talking like one

Maradonna Summer

Our love will last forever

that's a v. spethy dog

now find a racist one

tycoooooooooooon (12:42:51 AM): funny, how greeks think they invented everything, you guys have your asses far up your rear end its not even funny
cravencravin (12:43:07 AM): alright america is ichiban no. 1 huge big cock
cravencravin (12:43:11 AM): can I go gas threads now plz
tycoooooooooooon (12:43:20 AM): u guys invented homosexuality
tycoooooooooooon (12:43:27 AM): thats about it
cravencravin (12:43:23 AM): uh huh
cravencravin (12:43:25 AM): that's right
cravencravin (12:43:26 AM): ciao
tycoooooooooooon (12:44:06 AM): grown man will anal surprise sex little boys intohomosexuality, u guys are sick
cravencravin (12:44:11 AM): can you go the gently caress away please
tycoooooooooooon (12:44:28 AM): u got it
tycoooooooooooon (12:44:33 AM): i win
tycoooooooooooon (1:09:24 AM): i h8 black ppl

Kauka


ichiban no. 1 huge big cock

was that an american or a turk?

ADBOT LOVES YOU

hey! Hermano

by Lowtax

lol, who the hel is tycooooon

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