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GhostStalker
Mar 26, 2010

Guys, find a woman who looks at you the way GhostStalker looks at every bald, obese, single 58 year old accountant from Tulsa who managed to win $4,000 by not wagering on a Final Jeopardy triple stumper.

Archaotic posted:

Unfortunately, the mod seems to require either one or both of the expansions (which Firaxis is still charging full price for even now), so I won't be able to play along.

Just wait for a Steam sale to pick up the expansions, they usually go for 50% or more off. Dunno when the next one is going to be though, probably a midwinter or spring sale?

Lurked your previous Civ V LP, Speedball, learned some things that upped my own game. Gonna keep watching this one for sheer hilarity that it brings me. Don't have Brave New World yet (missed the last Steam sale), but once it goes on sale again and I get it, I'll take a look at downloading this mod (after I familiarize myself with the changes and additions that Brave New World added, of course). I've never played an MGS game, just picked up most of the details through nerd osmosis. Still, this is funny enough to keep watching.

Good on you for taking out Monty, that guy is always an rear end in a top hat. Attila is probably going to be the next guy on your list by dint of proximity, especially since he took out Ashurbanipal already. Never really had a problem with Alex all that much in my games, mostly because he usually spawns on another continent. Sure, I tend to compete with him a lot over City States, but it never actually comes to war because we're so drat far apart and he usually has other Civs he's beating on or needs to take care of first.

GhostStalker fucked around with this message at 18:47 on Jan 23, 2014

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Deadmeat5150
Nov 21, 2005

OLD MAN YELLS AT CLAN
Thanks to this I'm finally watching a MGS LP. I don't know poo poo about Peace Walker.

The Deleter
May 22, 2010
Big Boss in Metal Gear ZEKE vs Alexander in a robotic Colossus of Rhodes. It's the only way.

I'm actually fairly bad at Civ V - knowing when to expand is my most fundamental flaw besides neglecting religion, so Venice and MSF have taught me terrible habits. I should pick up Rome again, they're my favourites. Good luck taking out Shaka Zulu - I started a Japan game right next to the fucker and he wiped me out in the blink of an eye.

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

Deadmeat5150 posted:

Thanks to this I'm finally watching a MGS LP. I don't know poo poo about Peace Walker.

Short version: Dissatisfied American super-soldier Snake (Aka Big Boss) breaks away from the US to start his own mercenary company, which gets hired by Costa Rica (which has no army) to fight off a weird bunch of spooky military guys secretly invading and setting up an elaborate weapons project. The spooks are in fact CIA posing as mercenaries and the villain is a guy developing unmanned, automatic giant robots (in 1974, mind you!) for the purpose of having an automatic fail-deadly nuclear strike system that would autonomously nuke Russia if the US was killed in a first strike. The guy in charge is so loving nuts he figures the only way to prove his point is to actually start nuking inhabited places. So, of course, the protagonists take him down, with a few dramatic twists and turns.

Some of Snake's allies are refugee Sandinista rebels; Chico is one of their younger members and Snake pretty much hires him into MSF's services as a scout. Along the way, Snake tranquilizes and recruits hundreds of the enemy mercenaries into his own company (this is a big game mechanic) and his offshore plant grows into a huge sea base. Most of these guys and girls are extremely eccentric, if you read their profile screens. Snake also recruits one of the Peace Walker project's lead scientists and eventually builds his own nuclear-equipped giant robot, Metal Gear Zeke…which gets hijacked in the super-secret ending by one of his supposed allies. How well you've built Metal Gear determines how hard a boss fight it is, amusingly enough: a self-imposed challenge. However, how well you've built up Mother Base also affects the fight, since at max level there will be handy artillery launch platforms and supply cannons nearby to shoot at Zeke.

We will be getting Zeke back in this LP.

uPen
Jan 25, 2010

Zu Rodina!
Peace Walker is the best MGS game because this happens.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWKd08BcMfE&t=70s

Omobono
Feb 19, 2013

That's it! No more hiding in tomato crates! It's time to show that idiota Germany how a real nation fights!

For pasta~! CHARGE!

Speedball posted:

Snake also recruits one of the Peace Walker project's lead scientists and eventually builds his own nuclear-equipped giant robot, Metal Gear Zeke…which gets hijacked in the super-secret ending by one of his supposed allies.

You know, I think it's telling that I haven't played Peace Walker, but based on the other MGS games I've played this is a less spoiling spoiler than saying your average Disney flick has an happy ending.

I'll also join the circlejerk in saying that you perfectly captured then Kojima Brand madness for that boss battle.

uPen posted:

Peace Walker is the best MGS game because this happens.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWKd08BcMfE&t=70s
:allears:
Am I wrong in loving the MGS series despite, or rather because of, the insanity? Because if I am, I don't want to be right

Omobono fucked around with this message at 20:10 on Jan 23, 2014

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

I don't think you're wrong at all. Hell, my love of Rising pretty much tells me that the only thing keeping me from loving it is the sheer length of cutscene bullshit instead of gameplay, because Rising is crazy as gently caress and I love it for it even though I hate playing the MGS games.

Ms Adequate
Oct 30, 2011

Baby even when I'm dead and gone
You will always be my only one, my only one
When the night is calling
No matter who I become
You will always be my only one, my only one, my only one
When the night is calling



That was the best boss battle ever and I dearly want to fight Monty with eye lasers and sacrifices and stuff.

HerpicleOmnicron5
May 31, 2013

How did this smug dummkopf ever make general?


Peace Walker is a great MGS game because this happens. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1yVdNv3uvQ

I definitely would not class Peace Walker as the best though. There is too little story, and it comes too late. MGS2 is probably the most batshit insane, and therefore the best.

spooky attic
Jun 17, 2009

Ineffective at haunting cartridges.
The world really needs another peace walker game :allears:

Faust IX
Nov 6, 2009

abbic posted:

The world really needs another peace walker game :allears:

Absolutely, and to follow up with why, here's the best in cardboard box technology the R&D team ever came up with. Here's hoping it makes a reappearance somewhere.

ViggyNash
Oct 9, 2012
Most importantly: You can date Kaz.

The best MGS was probably 3 though.

Agent Interrobang
Mar 27, 2010

sugar & spice & psychoactive mushrooms
I'm sorry, I know you guys are talking about the BEST Metal Gear game, but I really thi- RULES OF NATURE

Sally
Jan 9, 2007


Don't post Small Dash!
This is a pretty swell LP. Just sayin'.

Looking forward to seeing how insane it gets. Also, hoping out for Hiawatha and Catherine as the last two civs--assuming there aren't any more mods in here.

Super Jay Mann
Nov 6, 2008

Oh my.

This is not what I expected when I opened this thread to start reading it today :stare:

This is the greatest mod and you are a fine gentleman for LPing it for us. Seems like a pretty interesting playstyle that manages to sorta be Venice but then not really.

Veloxyll
May 3, 2011

Fuck you say?!

Omobono posted:

I'll also join the circlejerk in saying that you perfectly captured then Kojima Brand madness for that boss battle.

:allears:
Am I wrong in loving the MGS series despite, or rather because of, the insanity? Because if I am, I don't want to be right

Nope. By now half the fun of Metal Gear games is the ridiculous nonsense that Kojima and co write into the stories.
And the equipment. Ultimate Co-operative weapon: Human Slingshot!

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

Part 7: Revenge!



A lot of our guys are hurting, and we can't push forward effectively yet, so we agreed to a temporary ceasefire. We'll need to rebuild and attack again soon, though. They're chomping at the bit to pay us back.

Yeah. What Montezuma said… that we'd need to completely wipe out his people to be free of their threat…he wasn't exaggerating. They're already copying us, starting to use iron swords.



Oooh, you've rebuilt so much here, Snake!

A lot of this just came from our latest battle. I'm thinking, next we need to work on a war room. That'll give us a whole new level of organization for our society. Our finances are hurting too, so we should probably set up trade caravans with whoever we can reach.

And I'm ordering up more sword guys--there's two barbarian pirate camps north of our bases, they're the ones who keep raiding our cargo ships. We need to take 'em down.

Anything you want me to do?

Honestly, I'm not even sure what you did on our last base, Cecile. Go, uh, study the birds or something.



Hey, we were attacked by these barbarian horse guys, but we were able to subdue them non-lethally and impressed them into our service! Looks like they like us more than they like the Aztecs.

Excellent work, Elephant! Keep that up and we'll bolster our army to huge sizes in no time.



According to intelligence, the Huns broke off their attack on Alexander, in exchange for one of his cities--but they're just burning it down for spite.

Heh. Kid got in over his head.

Snake, there may be cause for us to finish off Alexander, now, while he's weakened.

Why?

He's been spreading lies and rumors, subverting the independent states to his cause, and trying to get them to send him more recruits. If he keeps it up, we'll be out a lot of potential contracts.

Hrrm. Speaking of that…we need to take steps to make sure we're on better terms with the locals.



They pay us more if they like us more, so making sure we don't lose that goodwill is key. I'm going to issue a few sensitivity training sessions, make sure our troops butter up the city-states as much as possible.



Haha, profitable heroism! I just rescued some more tied-up hostages and this city loves us for it! Man, they're really paying out the big bucks now. Gotta love being a merc sometimes…

Case in point!



Hello, Big Boss. Making friends, I hear?

I've heard the same about you.

Indeed… I think you should keep your nose out of Milan's business. There's only so many tributes they can give out and I was here first.

Pretty tough talk for someone who just got beat down by Attila the Hun.

Hah. An extremely minor setback. I once tamed the great Bucephalus when all others thought it impossible. Once the world sees the new kind of stallion I'm breeding, I will again rule from horizon to horizon.

"New stallion?" What are you up to?

As I said, I've been making friends. One of them is very clever. Goodbye for now, old man. I suggest you turn your eyes to your own business, lest you lose it. *fftz*

Grrg. Yeah. He's definitely on my to-kill list now.



SPEAR-MAN! PREPARE TO MEET YOUR DOOM!

I am unafraid. My people have made empires tremble with fear.

(that's right, guys, keep chewing each other up while we grow…oof, Snake better not find out what I traded to Attila for this…)



Our forces are literally staring right at the faces of the Aztecs. Nobody's made a move yet but they've got murder on the brain.



Sir, why are we here?

Your new code names are Lemur and Marmoset. These are two typewriters. Get to it.

Sir? Sir, what do you mean? Sir? Sir?!

I guess we just start…writing whatever we feel like.



Sir! We've gotten reports that the remaining Aztecs just tried to take a few hostages from Samarkand again!

Right. That does it. Our troops are in position. Let's tear these suckers apart.



Tlat--tll--the south town is down!

Light that drat thing on fire. I don't want anyone returning there.



Our guys managed to capture one enemy catapult near Tlatelolco. This should make things more than even.



(looks like Attila's sending his battering rams to Shaka…here's hoping they occupy each other's time…)



I think our troops have done it! The rest of the Aztecs are surrendering their arms!



We should probably keep this one. It's got a giant lighthouse on it--it'll probably make navigation in these waters a lot easier. And if we need to fight off Attila it'll be a good buffer zone.

There's some orange groves near there too! Fruit is good for you. We don't want to succumb to scurvy!



Hell of a lot of salvage this time, Boss! I'm trying out a new "adaptive" training room, designed for guerillas. It'll train the troops to think on their feet, be more observant. They won't just learn more here, they'll gain experience faster in the field. And after that I think we can try out making a proper science facility.



So, you reveal yourself as yet another vile warlord, Snake. I knew it to be true.

What? No! Those guys were totally assholes!

Hmph! You live. They died. What else is there to say?

Of course, the other rulers will come to see you as a monster for this…heh heh…just as you thought me a monster…

Get out of my head, Monty!

To be continued…

Suspect Bucket
Jan 15, 2012

SHRIMPDOR WAS A MAN
I mean, HE WAS A SHRIMP MAN
er, maybe also A DRAGON
or possibly
A MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
BUT HE WAS STILL
SHRIMPDOR

Omobono posted:

:allears:
Am I wrong in loving the MGS series despite, or rather because of, the insanity? Because if I am, I don't want to be right

Because of, instead of, inspite of.

Outside inside

edit: So where's Amanda in all this? Was she picked up somewhere else and is kicking it with Catherine The Great?

Suspect Bucket fucked around with this message at 03:40 on Jan 24, 2014

IMJack
Apr 16, 2003

Royalty is a continuous ripping and tearing motion.


Fun Shoe
The best part is Snake randomly giving new code names to his troops.

Yesterday I was Capybara, today I am Rainbow Trout.

Adnor
Jan 11, 2013

Justice for Daisy

So Big Boss' hearing Monty's ghost?
That explains why he goes crazy.

LEGO Genetics
Oct 8, 2013

She growls as she storms the stadium
A villain mean and rough
And the cops all shake and quiver and quake
as she stabs them with her cuffs

Adnor posted:

So Big Boss' hearing Monty's ghost?
That explains why he goes crazy.

The Sorrow is just trolling him.

1stGear
Jan 16, 2010

Here's to the new us.

Adnor posted:

So Big Boss' hearing Monty's ghost?
That explains why he goes crazy.

The whole "world where soldiers always have a place" thing was less misinterpreting the Boss' final wish and more the result of having all of history's greatest warlords screaming in his head.

Rody One Half
Feb 18, 2011

Adnor posted:

So Big Boss' hearing Monty's ghost?
That explains why he goes crazy.
Clearly the only way for this to end is by researching the ultimate technology: trenchcoats.

ViggyNash
Oct 9, 2012

LEGO Genetics posted:

The Sorrow is just trolling him.

This whole scenario is probably the Sorrow giving him hallucinations.

This has to be one of my favorite LP's, and a good substitute for Geop's now finished (I think) The Last Of Us LP. The character dialog is :ocelot:.

Archaotic
Aug 12, 2008
New stallion? Someone very intelligent that Alexander picked up? I think I know where this is going...

And it amuses me. Greatly.

Superstring
Jul 22, 2007

I thought I was going insane for a second.

So, asking this question in here because it seems like there are some MGS experts in here. Was Outer Heaven supposed to be a good thing? Because a nation comprised entirely of soldiers with a nuke armed mecha doesn't really sound like a good thing...

KittyEmpress
Dec 30, 2012

Jam Buddies

Superstring posted:

So, asking this question in here because it seems like there are some MGS experts in here. Was Outer Heaven supposed to be a good thing? Because a nation comprised entirely of soldiers with a nuke armed mecha doesn't really sound like a good thing...

No. Yes. Maybe.

It started out 'good' (it gave soldiers homes and was meant to protect places that don't have military)

By the end of the game when you get your nuke, Big Boss is more than a little off the deep end.

You get to play through becoming a villain, yay!

Archaotic
Aug 12, 2008

Superstring posted:

So, asking this question in here because it seems like there are some MGS experts in here. Was Outer Heaven supposed to be a good thing? Because a nation comprised entirely of soldiers with a nuke armed mecha doesn't really sound like a good thing...
I don't think it really matters whether it was a good thing or not. The essence of it is that Big Boss thought it was a good thing, and look at where it got him.

I think one of the key takeaways from the series is that Big Boss continuously fails to actually understand what the Boss was trying to tell him at the end of MGS3, and the post-MGS3 games are all a side-effect of him taking his misunderstanding way, way too far.

SIGSEGV
Nov 4, 2010


Rocket horse head.

Rocket horse ox head.

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy

Superstring posted:

So, asking this question in here because it seems like there are some MGS experts in here. Was Outer Heaven supposed to be a good thing? Because a nation comprised entirely of soldiers with a nuke armed mecha doesn't really sound like a good thing...

Well, the idea was that soldiers could have their own separate "nation" and be hired to fight wars like contractors, instead of being manipulated by politics. They could also then fight for those who couldn't fight for themselves. I can't make real sense of it, because it's Weird Kojima poo poo, but there you go.

Rody One Half
Feb 18, 2011

Superstring posted:

So, asking this question in here because it seems like there are some MGS experts in here. Was Outer Heaven supposed to be a good thing? Because a nation comprised entirely of soldiers with a nuke armed mecha doesn't really sound like a good thing...

No, Big Boss becomes the first villain of the series because he tried to make Outer Heaven. The entire premise of OH is itself him misinterpreting the dying wish of his master as "create a place where soldiers can be free of politicians using them."

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

Superstring posted:

So, asking this question in here because it seems like there are some MGS experts in here. Was Outer Heaven supposed to be a good thing? Because a nation comprised entirely of soldiers with a nuke armed mecha doesn't really sound like a good thing...

Big Boss is basically a guy who turns into an insane militarist because he fetishizes the idea of being a soldier and warrior to a creepy degree.

Pyroi
Aug 17, 2013

gay elf noises
So, what will the MSF Troops write? Intricate tales of war, or stories about friendship blooming on the battlefield?

ViggyNash
Oct 9, 2012
If we take the story seriously, no, not really, but there's not much in MGS lore that's a clear-cut good/bad. Even his mentor, The Boss, was playing with nukes and primitive Metal Gears in trying to do what she thought was the right thing, and she was considered, by those who knew the truth, the ultimate american hero :911:.

Veloxyll
May 3, 2011

Fuck you say?!

or tales about hide and seek games. Or the Birthday parties on old Mother Base.

Rody One Half
Feb 18, 2011

ViggyNash posted:

If we take the story seriously, no, not really, but there's not much in MGS lore that's a clear-cut good/bad. Even his mentor, The Boss, was playing with nukes and primitive Metal Gears in trying to do what she thought was the right thing, and she was considered, by those who knew the truth, the ultimate american hero :911:.

It's further worth noting that the Boss, who MGS4 straight up frames as God (with Big Boss and another guy we won't see here as her apostles), if Big Boss didn't beat her in their duel at the end of 3, was planning on using an incalculably massive fortune and her natural command of all soldiers to conquer the planet as a backup plan.

I love Metal Gear.

ViggyNash
Oct 9, 2012

Rodyle posted:

It's further worth noting that the Boss, who MGS4 straight up frames as God (with Big Boss and another guy we won't see here as her apostles), if Big Boss didn't beat her in their duel at the end of 3, was planning on using an incalculably massive fortune and her natural command of all soldiers to conquer the planet as a backup plan.

I love Metal Gear.

Wait, what? How do we know that?

Chard
Aug 24, 2010




Man I really need to play Peace Walker, only MGS game I never got around to.

Rody One Half
Feb 18, 2011

ViggyNash posted:

Wait, what? How do we know that?

Well that's what she tells Snake before the duel anyway, something to the effect of taking the Legacy and going out to stomp poo poo. Admittedly this is probably total bullshit meant to motivate him more, but hey, what else is she going to do if he doesn't manage to complete his mission? :v:

I'm mostly just amused by a theoretical alternate Metal Gear world ruled by The Empress.

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ViggyNash
Oct 9, 2012

Rodyle posted:

alternate Metal Gear world ruled by The Empress.

I want Kojoma to see this and make this game now.

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