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get me HQ!
Jul 28, 2010

Aziz... spark that shit nigga
National Treasure 3: Rising Sun (2015)

Article 9 of the Japanese Constitution prevents Japan from using military force except in self-defense. Nic Cage discovers that in 1948, General MacArthur and Emperor Hirohito secretly created a codicil to the constitution that allows Japan to go on the offensive. The plan was to have Japan invade the Soviet Far East. Now a new ultranationalist charismatic leader has risen to become Prime Minister of Japan and he plans to invoke the secret "Article 10" to once again launch a surprise attack on Pearl Harbor.

The only way to prevent this is to steal the secret constitution and ceremonially cut it in half with a Hanzo hidden in the Chrysanthemum Throne. Nic Cage steals the constitution from its resting place beneath Yasukuni shrine, then travels to Kyoto to get the Hanzo. There, he finds that the Prime Minister (played by Ken Watanabe) is already at the Throne and has removed the Hanzo. Of course a gaijin cannot stand against a Hanzo unarmed so Cage manages to escape after a tense confrontation. During the confrontation the Prime Minister explains the true reason for the attack on Pearl Harbor (both past and his planned one): there is a giant, ten-foot pearl hidden somewhere in Pearl Harbor and it's ridiculously valuable.

The team steals MacArthur's corn cob pipe and spectrographic analysis of it reveals that the pearl is hidden in a secret chamber beneath the wreck of the USS Arizona. The Arizona actually suffered only light damage during the attack but it was cleverly scuttled to prevent the Japanese from reaching it in an anticipated land invasion of Hawaii that never materialized. Nic Cage must get to the pearl before the Japanese or all will be lost.

In order to access the secret chamber, Cage must climb into the caldera of Kilauea, the most dangerous volcano in Hawaii, to retrieve a secret code. Despite many warnings from the natives that the volcano is cursed, Cage retrieves the code and heads for Pearl Harbor. Meanwhile the team steals George Patton's legendary cavalry saber - the only steel in existence that can defeat a true Hanzo. Cage enters the chamber but the Prime Minister steps out from behind the giant pearl bearing his Hanzo. Cage bests him in one-on-one combat and forces the Prime Minister to cut the secret constitution in half with the Hanzo. Cage then shatters the Hanzo with Patton's saber, forever breaking the will of the Japanese people and ensuring the safety of the giant pearl. In a post credits scene, the Prime Minister takes the broken Hanzo to Yasukuni shrine and uses it to commit seppuku.

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gary oldmans diary
Sep 26, 2005
i hate how every civilization game makes you :airquote: research religion

Bold Robot
Jan 6, 2009

Be brave.



would be cool if he had to go find bin laden's body or something

JakeP
Apr 27, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Lipstick Apathy

Hobohemian
Sep 30, 2005

by XyloJW

Is this stuff actually funny to some people? I'll never understand the type of person that finds humor in image macros. Even gamequoter knows that poo poo is played.

Novo
May 13, 2003

Stercorem pro cerebro habes
Soiled Meat
you might find this historical factoid interesting, unfunny gimmicks used to be bannable

Hobohemian
Sep 30, 2005

by XyloJW

Novo posted:

you might find this historical factoid interesting, unfunny gimmicks used to be bannable

I remember, and I guess things are a bit better when every little thing isn't a bannable offense, but where's the community backlash that was supposed to shame these idiots into never posting again? You guys are slippin'.

get me HQ!
Jul 28, 2010

Aziz... spark that shit nigga

this is really loving dumb but just in case - stay safe parvati's ghost

Harald
Jul 10, 2009

by Fluffdaddy
no idea who that is.

if someone did Pavarotti's ghost I would probably at least chuckle at that

Putty
Mar 21, 2013

HOOKED ON THE BROTHERS

1

Business Gorillas
Mar 11, 2009

:harambe:



Novo posted:

you might find this historical factoid interesting, unfunny gimmicks used to be bannable

i bet there are all sorts of 1.0 gbs posters still running around in PYF

JakeP
Apr 27, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Lipstick Apathy
actually nah i dont care

JakeP fucked around with this message at 20:14 on May 30, 2014

Inevitable
Jul 27, 2007

by Ralp
stay safe parvati's ghost

Justin Godscock
Oct 12, 2004

Listen here, funnyman!
who the gently caress is pavrati?

Inevitable
Jul 27, 2007

by Ralp

Justin Godscock posted:

who the gently caress is pavrati?

RIP :(

Panamaniac
Jun 18, 2007

HEROES NEVER DIE

Big McHuge
Feb 5, 2014

You wait for the war to happen like vultures.
If you want to help, prevent the war.
Don't save the remnants.

Save them all.
Stay safe Havarti ghost.






please protect my cheese

Hobohemian
Sep 30, 2005

by XyloJW
I liked the leading lady in those movies. She was hot. For a blonde.

Future Mrs Booger
Jan 18, 2012

thunderchief posted:

National Treasure 3: Rising Sun (2015)

Article 9 of the Japanese Constitution prevents Japan from using military force except in self-defense. Nic Cage discovers that in 1948, General MacArthur and Emperor Hirohito secretly created a codicil to the constitution that allows Japan to go on the offensive. The plan was to have Japan invade the Soviet Far East. Now a new ultranationalist charismatic leader has risen to become Prime Minister of Japan and he plans to invoke the secret "Article 10" to once again launch a surprise attack on Pearl Harbor.

The only way to prevent this is to steal the secret constitution and ceremonially cut it in half with a Hanzo hidden in the Chrysanthemum Throne. Nic Cage steals the constitution from its resting place beneath Yasukuni shrine, then travels to Kyoto to get the Hanzo. There, he finds that the Prime Minister (played by Ken Watanabe) is already at the Throne and has removed the Hanzo. Of course a gaijin cannot stand against a Hanzo unarmed so Cage manages to escape after a tense confrontation. During the confrontation the Prime Minister explains the true reason for the attack on Pearl Harbor (both past and his planned one): there is a giant, ten-foot pearl hidden somewhere in Pearl Harbor and it's ridiculously valuable.

The team steals MacArthur's corn cob pipe and spectrographic analysis of it reveals that the pearl is hidden in a secret chamber beneath the wreck of the USS Arizona. The Arizona actually suffered only light damage during the attack but it was cleverly scuttled to prevent the Japanese from reaching it in an anticipated land invasion of Hawaii that never materialized. Nic Cage must get to the pearl before the Japanese or all will be lost.

In order to access the secret chamber, Cage must climb into the caldera of Kilauea, the most dangerous volcano in Hawaii, to retrieve a secret code. Despite many warnings from the natives that the volcano is cursed, Cage retrieves the code and heads for Pearl Harbor. Meanwhile the team steals George Patton's legendary cavalry saber - the only steel in existence that can defeat a true Hanzo. Cage enters the chamber but the Prime Minister steps out from behind the giant pearl bearing his Hanzo. Cage bests him in one-on-one combat and forces the Prime Minister to cut the secret constitution in half with the Hanzo. Cage then shatters the Hanzo with Patton's saber, forever breaking the will of the Japanese people and ensuring the safety of the giant pearl. In a post credits scene, the Prime Minister takes the broken Hanzo to Yasukuni shrine and uses it to commit seppuku.

You forgot the part where Nic Cage's grandad raped some Japanese POW and the resulting child is a security guard and helps them steal the constitution, then renounces her Japanese ancestry and helps Cage throughout the rest of their journey. The final scene of the movie is of her taking her American citizenship oath with the Supreme Court justices in DC.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
good end

Highly Unnecessary
Dec 24, 2009

thank u mr skeltal

Putty
Mar 21, 2013

HOOKED ON THE BROTHERS

1

a shiny rock
Nov 13, 2009

the search for ben franklins dildo

Nameless_Steve
Oct 18, 2010

"There are fair questions about shooting non-lethally at retreating civilian combatants."
stay safe puberty ghost

Putty
Mar 21, 2013

HOOKED ON THE BROTHERS

Parallax Scroll posted:

the search for ben franklins dildo

i already know where that is

Fur20
Nov 14, 2007

すご▞い!
君は働か░い
フ▙▓ズなんだね!
why do americans have such a hard-on for ben franklin's dildo, that poo poo was probably like indiana jones and the holy grail. buncha libertarians searching for this golden dilz and it's just some shitstained piece of wood

nic cage fills it with cumlube to save his dad

bam, plot for national treasure 3

Inevitable
Jul 27, 2007

by Ralp
stay safe ben franklin dildo ghost

Troll Bridgington
Dec 22, 2011

Keeping up foreign relations.

thunderchief posted:

National Treasure 3: Rising Sun (2015)

Article 9 of the Japanese Constitution prevents Japan from using military force except in self-defense. Nic Cage discovers that in 1948, General MacArthur and Emperor Hirohito secretly created a codicil to the constitution that allows Japan to go on the offensive. The plan was to have Japan invade the Soviet Far East. Now a new ultranationalist charismatic leader has risen to become Prime Minister of Japan and he plans to invoke the secret "Article 10" to once again launch a surprise attack on Pearl Harbor.

The only way to prevent this is to steal the secret constitution and ceremonially cut it in half with a Hanzo hidden in the Chrysanthemum Throne. Nic Cage steals the constitution from its resting place beneath Yasukuni shrine, then travels to Kyoto to get the Hanzo. There, he finds that the Prime Minister (played by Ken Watanabe) is already at the Throne and has removed the Hanzo. Of course a gaijin cannot stand against a Hanzo unarmed so Cage manages to escape after a tense confrontation. During the confrontation the Prime Minister explains the true reason for the attack on Pearl Harbor (both past and his planned one): there is a giant, ten-foot pearl hidden somewhere in Pearl Harbor and it's ridiculously valuable.

The team steals MacArthur's corn cob pipe and spectrographic analysis of it reveals that the pearl is hidden in a secret chamber beneath the wreck of the USS Arizona. The Arizona actually suffered only light damage during the attack but it was cleverly scuttled to prevent the Japanese from reaching it in an anticipated land invasion of Hawaii that never materialized. Nic Cage must get to the pearl before the Japanese or all will be lost.

In order to access the secret chamber, Cage must climb into the caldera of Kilauea, the most dangerous volcano in Hawaii, to retrieve a secret code. Despite many warnings from the natives that the volcano is cursed, Cage retrieves the code and heads for Pearl Harbor. Meanwhile the team steals George Patton's legendary cavalry saber - the only steel in existence that can defeat a true Hanzo. Cage enters the chamber but the Prime Minister steps out from behind the giant pearl bearing his Hanzo. Cage bests him in one-on-one combat and forces the Prime Minister to cut the secret constitution in half with the Hanzo. Cage then shatters the Hanzo with Patton's saber, forever breaking the will of the Japanese people and ensuring the safety of the giant pearl. In a post credits scene, the Prime Minister takes the broken Hanzo to Yasukuni shrine and uses it to commit seppuku.

I would watch it.

haunted bong
Jun 24, 2007


stay safe mr skeltal

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
Nic Cage has to pilot a zero at one point and survive a kamikaze dive into a building or something.

les fleurs du mall
Jun 30, 2014

by LadyAmbien

gary oldmans diary posted:

i hate how every civilization game makes you :airquote: research religion

What? you don't love being told "you have researched Monotheism!"?

les fleurs du mall
Jun 30, 2014

by LadyAmbien



Also Parvati is already kind of a ghost?: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parvati


Stay safe hinduism gods

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Quickscope420dad posted:

What? you don't love being told "you have researched Monotheism!"?

The idea that religion is something constructed ("researched") deliberately by state actors for the purpose of social control, rather than the true revelation of divine knowledge is offensive to me.

TOILETLORD
Nov 13, 2012

by XyloJW

i can see how a face like that could turn a man gay.

1gnoirents
Jun 28, 2014

hello :)
Rotten Tomatoes Score 78%

no mom very hungry
Oct 5, 2004

You are getting sleepy...

Stay safe Parvati's ghost :ohdear:

i hate everything
Oct 15, 2010
Cum model?

Helical Nightmares
Apr 30, 2009

thunderchief posted:

National Treasure 3: Rising Sun (2015)

Article 9 of the Japanese Constitution prevents Japan from using military force except in self-defense. Nic Cage discovers that in 1948, General MacArthur and Emperor Hirohito secretly created a codicil to the constitution that allows Japan to go on the offensive. The plan was to have Japan invade the Soviet Far East. Now a new ultranationalist charismatic leader has risen to become Prime Minister of Japan and he plans to invoke the secret "Article 10" to once again launch a surprise attack on Pearl Harbor.

The only way to prevent this is to steal the secret constitution and ceremonially cut it in half with a Hanzo hidden in the Chrysanthemum Throne. Nic Cage steals the constitution from its resting place beneath Yasukuni shrine, then travels to Kyoto to get the Hanzo. There, he finds that the Prime Minister (played by Ken Watanabe) is already at the Throne and has removed the Hanzo. Of course a gaijin cannot stand against a Hanzo unarmed so Cage manages to escape after a tense confrontation. During the confrontation the Prime Minister explains the true reason for the attack on Pearl Harbor (both past and his planned one): there is a giant, ten-foot pearl hidden somewhere in Pearl Harbor and it's ridiculously valuable.

The team steals MacArthur's corn cob pipe and spectrographic analysis of it reveals that the pearl is hidden in a secret chamber beneath the wreck of the USS Arizona. The Arizona actually suffered only light damage during the attack but it was cleverly scuttled to prevent the Japanese from reaching it in an anticipated land invasion of Hawaii that never materialized. Nic Cage must get to the pearl before the Japanese or all will be lost.

In order to access the secret chamber, Cage must climb into the caldera of Kilauea, the most dangerous volcano in Hawaii, to retrieve a secret code. Despite many warnings from the natives that the volcano is cursed, Cage retrieves the code and heads for Pearl Harbor. Meanwhile the team steals George Patton's legendary cavalry saber - the only steel in existence that can defeat a true Hanzo. Cage enters the chamber but the Prime Minister steps out from behind the giant pearl bearing his Hanzo. Cage bests him in one-on-one combat and forces the Prime Minister to cut the secret constitution in half with the Hanzo. Cage then shatters the Hanzo with Patton's saber, forever breaking the will of the Japanese people and ensuring the safety of the giant pearl. In a post credits scene, the Prime Minister takes the broken Hanzo to Yasukuni shrine and uses it to commit seppuku.

:golfclap: Greenlight.

Alan Smithee
Jan 4, 2005


A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...
Nic Cage finds out that in fact he was the National Treasure this entire time

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Nut to Butt
Apr 13, 2009

by FactsAreUseless

Big McHuge posted:

Stay safe Havarti ghost.






please protect my cheese

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