Captain Bravo posted:

Goons, generally, don't seem to be well known for their excellent social graces. Add in an uncomfortable situation, and it's easy to see your only two options as being rude, or being a doormat.

Well, screw that! We all have situations wherein a necessary conversation looks like a minefield of issues, so let's pool the communal Goonmind and pump out some Judith Martin-level advice on asserting yourself in a respectful and non-confrontational manner. Let's Learn Advanced Etiquette!

My first question is one that has bugged me for a while now, with previous roommates, but is now becoming an issue with a coworker. How do I get people to stop stealing my poo poo?

It's not a huge, overt theft, but one annoying bastard at my job keeps taking my drinks. I stock the break room each week with juice and sodas for myself, and occasionally offer one to someone if they don't have money for the soda machine, but this dude has started taking multiple drinks per day without asking, and without offering to recompense me. So what's the best way to assert my right to not have my drinks taken, without calling the dude a thief and making him hate working with me. (even more than he already does...)

Or, to put it another way, how do I defuse a potentially hostile work situation without just making it worse?