Best hot sauce

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Shugojin: Sep 6, 2007; THE TAIL THAT BURNS TWICE AS BRIGHT...

just grabbin' a pepper and squeezing its guts all over your food

bonus, lets you know if you had any tiny cuts on your hand

# ? Aug 1, 2014 18:21

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 18:52

NihilismNow: Aug 31, 2003

Shugojin posted:

just grabbin' a pepper and squeezing its guts all over your food

bonus, lets you know if you had any tiny cuts on your hand

You are also reminded of how often you touch your face/eyes.

# ? Aug 1, 2014 18:25

Xaris: Jul 25, 2006; Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

Working your way up the hotsauce ladder is like the story of the Goatse.

Much like the Goatman started with inserting marbles into his rear end, moved up to limes, tennis balls, and finally footballs. It's all about elastically. The same principle applies to hot sauce.

You gotta first start with sticking a bell pepper up your rear end. You will feel discomfort the first couple hours. Then started moving up to a peperoncini, then a jalepno, then a serano, then a cayenne pepper, then a african bird pepper, then a haberno, then a ghost pepper; and finally you're able to stick a trinidad scorpion up there. All nice and hot.

Take it from me, it works loving fantastically.

Your butt can withstand entering earth's scorching atmosphere and NASA will contact you about requisitioning your anal lining to put on their next generation space shuttle for a modest fee.

Xaris fucked around with this message at 18:34 on Aug 1, 2014

# ? Aug 1, 2014 18:32

Lawman 0: Aug 17, 2010

NihilismNow posted:

You are also reminded of how often you touch your face/eyes.

I remember this one time during a scout campout we were making chilli and my buddy cut up habaneros without gloves and then touched his eyes.
He spent about 20 minutes under the water tank before we got him some milk to wash out his eyes.

# ? Aug 1, 2014 18:44

Al Cowens: Aug 11, 2004; by WE B Bourgeois

Shugojin posted:

just grabbin' a pepper and squeezing its guts all over your food

bonus, lets you know if you had any tiny cuts on your hand

God help you if you wear contacts

# ? Aug 1, 2014 18:48

Xaris: Jul 25, 2006; Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

So long story short, I was eating finger food with Tabasco sauce. I finished and decided to beat off. I noticed a lot of heat, and eventually painful burning. Came to the conclusion that it's the sauce. This hurts like a mother fucker. What can I do, considering we're out of milk? Any topical cream or anything? And are there any lasting damage caused by this?

e: Ok. The burn somewhat subsided, but it's still there. Not as bad as before, but still very there. Took a shower and applied Aloe Vera cream on it. I think my only option now it to wait it out. I'll look for some hydrocortisone.

# ? Aug 1, 2014 19:02

Necros: Jul 23, 2003

Al Cowens posted:

God help you if you wear contacts

or touch your or another persons genitals several hours later

# ? Aug 1, 2014 19:03

Flesh Forge: Jan 31, 2011; LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY DOG

or pick your nose

# ? Aug 1, 2014 19:18

ocrumsprug: Sep 23, 2010; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Surprisingly, I like Nando's (the other cock hot sauce) for a number of things.

Not ridiculously hot, but tasty.

# ? Aug 1, 2014 19:19

George H.W. Cunt: Oct 6, 2010

I hazed some freshmen with this in college once. Each had to do a shot of it. Enjoy your hot lava poo poo boys.

# ? Aug 1, 2014 19:20

Xaris: Jul 25, 2006; Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

ocrumsprug posted:

Surprisingly, I like Nando's (the other cock hot sauce) for a number of things.

Not ridiculously hot, but tasty.

idk I ate a Nando's in NZ and it wasnt' as good as I hopped. tasted mostly vinegary and a lot more watery than I expected

# ? Aug 2, 2014 02:51

Amarcarts: Feb 21, 2007; This looks a lot like suffering.

You can build up your body's tolerance to the spiciness to the point where you don't really notice the heat (well you do but it's mild) just the flavor.

Peppers are great plants to grow yourself because a lot of the spicy ones do really well in containers and have high yields with almost no maintenance.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 03:17

Winter Fresh: Oct 31, 2011

Louisiana hot sauce is definitely in the garbage tier

# ? Aug 2, 2014 03:47

Spider Helidon: Nov 4, 2010; by XyloJW

Xaris posted:

butt-death owns. better than europe or aus/nz where even pepper or tabasco is too spicy for them (seriously it was hell trying to find a good hot sauce over there that wasn't imported from USA)

also have fun drinking lead, i think el yucatek was one that had pretty high levels of lead in it. i do like valentino tho for a cheap option.

Byron Bay mango and habanero. Everything in Byron Bay is made by hippies who are stoned and/or tripping so you know it's good.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 03:56

salt shakeup: Jun 27, 2004; 'orrible fucking nights

Sriracha, motherbitches!

# ? Aug 2, 2014 04:00

Demonachizer: Aug 7, 2004

http://www.hotsauce.com/16-Million-PURE-Capsaicin-Crystals-1-0ml-p/hsc-16-million-crystals1.0.htm

# ? Aug 2, 2014 04:10

CruJones: Feb 22, 2006; by Lowtax

You guys act like there's only one or two sauces available. The best hot sauce depends on what type of food you're eating. Por ejemplo: Louisiana is for nachos. Cholula is for breakfast/potatos/breakfast potatos. Sriracha is for Asian cuisine. Hell, they even had Tapatio flavored Doritos for a while there. There are literally endless possibilities here.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 04:11

Dang It Bhabhi!: May 27, 2004; ASK ME ABOUT
BEING
ESCULA GRIND'S
#1 SIMP

Winter Fresh posted:

Louisiana hot sauce is definitely in the garbage tier

Ha look at this guy not knowing about a thing.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 04:21

poverty goat: Feb 15, 2004

some goons in a previous GBS hotsauce thread turned me on to Harissa which is Libya's traditional hot sauce I guess, its a little thicker than your normal hot sauce, good for spreading on sandwiches and whatnot, and it has a good heat:flavor composition. You can get it for :5bux: or so on amazon. Cock sauce is poo poo tier in comparison.

Also if you insist on using ketchup this is the only choice

# ? Aug 2, 2014 04:29

Dang It Bhabhi!: May 27, 2004; ASK ME ABOUT
BEING
ESCULA GRIND'S
#1 SIMP

It's not a sports team. You can like a lot of them and they come in all flavors and spiceys.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 04:31

forbidden dialectics: Jul 26, 2005

hot sauce snobs probably poo poo on them but i haven't tried a dave's hot sauce that wasn't both flavorful and hot. the habanero one is the best.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 04:34

Ruggan: Feb 20, 2007; WHAT THAT SMELL LIKE?!

I prefer a squirt of warm lactose on my food, really brightens up the dish. Doesn't matter the source. Mom?

# ? Aug 2, 2014 04:36

Whooping Crabs: Apr 13, 2010; Sorry for the derail but I fuckin love me some racoons

I found that commercial hot sauce wasn't strong enough to entirely kill of my sense of taste or texture so I just slather my food in orajel instead

# ? Aug 2, 2014 04:47

The Fuzzy Hulk: Nov 22, 2007; ASK ME ABOUT CROSSING THE STREAMS

I'm sure I'll get lynched but I had this on a hamburger and thought it was delicious.

http://www.tabasco.com/tabasco-products/sauces/tabasco-chipotle-sauce/

# ? Aug 2, 2014 05:08

Gatts: Jan 2, 2001; Goodnight Moon; Nap Ghost

Hot sauce that is hot with flavor is the best. Especially on wings.

I had wings with Trinidad scorpion pepper sauce and I was knocking that poo poo down but then accidentally touched my eye.

I had to stop after that.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 05:09

good electric: Jan 29, 2009; HIS LIFE IS DEFICIENT. HE NEVER HAS SEX.

HE LACKS $10 TO BUY HIMSELF A CUSTOM TITLE AND IS REDUCED TO BEGGING FOR ONE.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 05:28

Tiberius Thyben: Feb 7, 2013; Gone Phishing

I like Sriracha for some things, but also have a proper ground chili paste, and some cholula.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 05:43

Mushika: Dec 22, 2010

CruJones posted:

You guys act like there's only one or two sauces available. The best hot sauce depends on what type of food you're eating. Por ejemplo: Louisiana is for nachos. Cholula is for breakfast/potatos/breakfast potatos. Sriracha is for Asian cuisine. Hell, they even had Tapatio flavored Doritos for a while there. There are literally endless possibilities here.

fyodor posted:

It's not a sports team. You can like a lot of them and they come in all flavors and spiceys.

Seriously, people, this. If you want to put pure capsaicin into everything from your eggs to your ice cream, go right ahead. Most of us who actually like good food prefer lots of different hot sauces for lots of different foods. I like Crystal in my red beans, Cholula on my breakfast tacos, Sriracha can be substituted for ketchup in just about all cases, and don't even start on the huge varieties of pastes and sauces to go with various southeast Asian dishes.

You know what's also cool? Mixing all of that up. Throw sambal on a burrito. Mix really spicy kimchi in a cole slaw. Try Crystal mixed with soy sauce to dip sushi into. Vietnamese garlic chili paste is delicious a whole slew of stuff like pasta, chili, and (don't tell my family) gumbo.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 06:21

Nonsense: Jan 26, 2007

Al Cowens posted:

Actual god drat fresh peppers that are in an acidic or otherwise caustic solution but in a pinch some generic jalapeno thing from trader joe's is good for a chili

try using serrano pepers instead of jale penos. gud

# ? Aug 2, 2014 06:31

Nonsense: Jan 26, 2007

gggiiimmmppp posted:

some goons in a previous GBS hotsauce thread turned me on to Harissa which is Libya's traditional hot sauce I guess, its a little thicker than your normal hot sauce, good for spreading on sandwiches and whatnot, and it has a good heat:flavor composition. You can get it for :5bux: or so on amazon. Cock sauce is poo poo tier in comparison.

Also if you insist on using ketchup this is the only choice

Melinda's looks tasty never heard of it, this is all I've been using

# ? Aug 2, 2014 06:32

ur in my world now: Jun 5, 2006; ^{Same as it ever was}
^{Same as it ever was}
^{Same as it ever was}
^{Same as it ever was}; Smellrose

Nonsense posted:

try using serrano pepers instead of jale penos. gud

serranos are my go-to peppers for chili

# ? Aug 2, 2014 06:36

Al Cowens: Aug 11, 2004; by WE B Bourgeois

My singapore noodles needs some more burn and I'm going to get some right now

Also the burn from handling peppers with your hands feels loving amazing but not on the things you handle... like contact lenses

# ? Aug 2, 2014 06:39

Alec Bald Snatch: Sep 12, 2012; by exmarx

Carol Pizzamom posted:

i love thick habanero sauces but because habaneros naturally have so much spice those sauces often overdo the heat and you cant really even taste the habanero, which has a real unique flavor

they make milder habanero varieties

# ? Aug 2, 2014 07:03

Clipperton: Dec 20, 2011; Grimey Drawer

frank's or gently caress off

# ? Aug 2, 2014 07:20

Al Cowens: Aug 11, 2004; by WE B Bourgeois

Just came back with a few serrano chiles and a small jar of this stuff

It's not sriracha, but it's by the same company. I checked the ingredients and vinegar was the fourth ingredient, not the first so maybe this is not trash.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 07:33

Haptical Sales Slut: Mar 15, 2010; Age 18 to 49

Jack in the box TACO SAUCE packets

# ? Aug 2, 2014 13:42

Al Cowens: Aug 11, 2004; by WE B Bourgeois

Trip report: It's great and I look forward to using it for more stir-fry things in the future. Please don't mistake it for sriracha because it's a different beast entirely.

# ? Aug 2, 2014 13:44