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Lord Waffle Beard
Dec 7, 2013
I didn't know this was A Thing until I was having a chat with this girl at work. Apparently she gets off best when her BF (who she hates) is doing her doggystyle, I was thinking about asking her out but I don't know enough about Butt Stuff :stonk: to feel confident in bed with a girl this experienced.

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BloodThirster
Jan 8, 2001
Just go for it

sigher
Apr 22, 2008

My guiding Moonlight...



Doggy doesn't have to be in the rear end bro, but double check with your mom.

Miss Cheggs
Mar 22, 2007



the best way to test the waters is with a finger

ferroque
Oct 27, 2007

do what i call "checking the oil" first.

ferroque
Oct 27, 2007

girls that like butt stuff are keepers. its
cool you can do "butt stuff" and "regular stuff" all at once woah wow

Lord Waffle Beard
Dec 7, 2013

Sire Oblivion posted:

Doggy doesn't have to be in the rear end bro, but double check with your mom.

Thats what it is, otherwise you wouldn't be able to "reach"

Trip Larsen
Oct 4, 2006

My great-grandfather started Larsen Pork Products with little more than three pigs and a killing hammer. Today, I'm proud to say, we kill more pigs than pig hepatitis.
tell her you're Lord Waffle Beard while you're inside her, that'll finish her off

Lord Waffle Beard
Dec 7, 2013

Sire Oblivion posted:

Doggy doesn't have to be in the rear end bro, but double check with your mom.
Thats what it is, otherwise you wouldn't be able to :airquote:reach:airquote:

the damn Ruskis are back
Jan 25, 2006

And blew, Childe Roland to the Dark Tower Came!

Lord Waffle Beard posted:

Thats what it is, otherwise you wouldn't be able to :airquote:reach:airquote:

wtf does that mean

gorki
Aug 9, 2014
butt orgasms are superior to dick orgasms imo. idk about woman orgasms tho

Mnemosyne
Jun 11, 2002

There's no safe way to put a cat in a paper bag!!

Lord Waffle Beard posted:

Thats what it is, otherwise you wouldn't be able to :airquote:reach:airquote:

Yeah, what the hell are you talking about here?

FuriousGeorge
Jan 23, 2006

Ah, the simple joys of a monkey knife-fight.
Grimey Drawer
gotta hit her prostate, OP. works every time.

Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012

lol i forgot lord waffel beard thinks you can only do anal if you're doing it doggy style.

ded
Oct 27, 2005

Kooler than Jesus
the best way to do it is jam your entire arm up to your elbow in her rear end in a top hat and feel around with your fingers for the spots that get her going

Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012

Christmas Miracle posted:

lol i forgot lord waffel beard thinks you can only do anal if you're doing it doggy style.

btw this is true and also if you're giving a man a blowjob you have to stick a finger in his rear end or it won't work

Pontificating Ass
Aug 2, 2002

What Doth Life?
my first GF was saving her virginity for the cucking so we only did rear end stuff and she makes the moust noise when you get above and stab down

have fun!

Marta Velasquez
Mar 9, 2013

Good thing I was feeling suicidal this morning...
Fallen Rib

Christmas Miracle posted:

btw this is true and also if you're giving a man a blowjob you have to stick a finger in his rear end or it won't work

How else would you press the cum button when you want him to fire? It would be difficult to use your dick from that position.

BloodThirster
Jan 8, 2001
I find it beat to go on a "practice run" with one of your bro friends before going live. It's not gay if you're gonna do it with a chick later

Secks Cauldron
Aug 26, 2006

I thought they closed that place down!
Only on men. Sorry OP :shrug:

gorki
Aug 9, 2014

BloodThirster posted:

I find it beat to go on a "practice run" with one of your bro friends before going live. It's not gay if you're gonna do it with a chick later

tbh if you wanna be a competent top you gotta master bottoming first. stands to reason imo

Forums Barber
Jan 5, 2011

FuriousGeorge posted:

gotta hit her prostate, OP. works every time.

same

Fuck Your Website
Nov 29, 2003
FUCK YOU, AND FUCK YOUR WEBSITE
Your mom loves it

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010



Thats what it is, otherwise you wouldn't be able to "reach"

Woof Blitzer
Dec 29, 2012

[-]
lord waffle beard

subhuman filth
Nov 1, 2006

ok i think im having a stroke right now because im about 80% sure this exact thread happened like a year ago

Festus The Fetus
Mar 8, 2010

Lord Waffle Beard posted:

Thats what it is, otherwise you wouldn't be able to :airquote:reach:airquote:

I feel like this is supposed to be a wink-wink, nudge-nudge thing but I don't get it. Explain please lord waffle beard.

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

hes sayinbg his peen isnt long enough to breach the butt cheeks and enter the anal hole if they are not bending over really far

JimsonTheBetrayer
Oct 13, 2010

Game's over, and fuck you Jimson. It's not my fault that you guys couldn't get your shit together by deadline. No one gets access to docs because I don't fucking care anymore, I hope you all enjoyed ruining my game, and there won't be another.

lonesomedwarf posted:

Thats what it is, otherwise you wouldn't be able to "reach"

Ben Murphy
Sep 9, 2001

I like him in spite of the fact that he's not me.
?

Ben Murphy fucked around with this message at 13:25 on Sep 20, 2014

Festus The Fetus
Mar 8, 2010

lonesomedwarf posted:

hes sayinbg his peen isnt long enough to breach the butt cheeks and enter the anal hole if they are not bending over really far

That can't be be it because the pussy's below the butthole and if he went the other way the pussy's on the top, but the butthole is still easily accessible. Hence I don't get it.

Edit: I see now the butt cheeks themselves are the gate that cannot be breached.

Festus The Fetus fucked around with this message at 08:01 on Sep 4, 2014

Flavor Truck
Nov 5, 2007

My Love for You is like a Truck
Imagine four buttholes on the edge of a cliff..

the worst thing is
Oct 3, 2013

by FactsAreUseless
OP has only been with fat chicks

les fleurs du mall
Jun 30, 2014

by LadyAmbien
Your dick just has to be really really really big OP

just huge

so big

wow.

the worst thing is
Oct 3, 2013

by FactsAreUseless
Or he thought the average penis size was 4 inches. It was very unsettling to him to learn this was not true

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

i like a big girls butt, but its hard sometimes because you bounce off it when you dash at the butt hole

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

i mean a girls butt that is big, like a big butt on a girl, a big girls butt, not the butt of a big girl, but maybe sometimes that too

the unabonger
Jun 21, 2009
i have tons op

Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde
stuff butts, smoke weed

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3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

Hahahaha yeah women having orgasms like that's even possible :laffo:

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