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I get it, you are a loving grognard. You're too devoid of motivation to do anything with the college degree it took you almost 6 years to get. You are too smart to "get a job" but not smart enough to build the next Apple or Tesla in your garage. You can't seem to finish that novel you started when you were what, 22? You've disappointed your parents... not enough for them to say anything but enough for them to talk about it with their friends. You're overweight, still pining after that girl you couldn't even approach in high school and now even jerking your pathetic dick is turning into a chore. For a while it seemed that going out and getting wasted every night was going to be your "thing," but you don't even do that anymore; not for any mature reason (like its obvious impact on your already-poor health) or the fact that its kind of lost its gonzo/rebel/palahniuk charm but rather because you're such an obnoxious drunk that people tend to get sick of you really quickly. You think you're Hemingway (or Heinlein, or Herbert, or Capote, or Bukowski) but really you're Harmon, without the wit. No one listens to your free-form podcast and your attempts to monetize your youtube channel have so far only garnered confused support from your aunt and Rodney, that rear end in a top hat from middle school who friend requests you ever time he realizes that you've dropped him from your friends list. Your life is poo poo. You are poo poo. So what's the answer here, then? Get in shape? Work on your flaws? Get that therapy you probably need? Make any sort of real change beyond that token attempt you make every january? No. For you, the best thing to do is just man up. Cut your throat open with that straight razor you bought a few months ago. You know, the one you bought with that stupid loving boarshair brush and expensive-rear end shave cream, just because it was payday and you read the shaving thread in old GBS? Isn't amazon prime amazing? How do they even make money?
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Sep 27, 2014 22:21
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Not gonna read any of this loving poo poo
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Sep 27, 2014 22:22
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dead tells the slain
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Sep 27, 2014 22:23
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Actually you are pretty off base about a lot of things here op, tbh.
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Sep 27, 2014 22:25
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you get on my nerves
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Sep 27, 2014 22:26
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you missed e/n, OP
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Sep 27, 2014 22:27
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I know what you do, 'cause I do it too.
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Sep 27, 2014 22:27
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I bought a safety razor and brush and expensive shaving cream because of that thread. This man is a prophet.
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Sep 27, 2014 22:28
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that shaving kit is an awesome gift idea. actually, the first half of your list was a very good cold reading, but the second half trailed off into social network bullshit, and u lost me (not that i could do much better). good poo poo, op.
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Sep 27, 2014 22:33
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Sep 27, 2014 22:34
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IBurnStuffAlot posted:I get it, you are a loving grognard. You're too devoid of motivation to do anything with the college degree it took you almost 6 years to get. You are too smart to "get a job" but not smart enough to build the next Apple or Tesla in your garage. You can't seem to finish that novel you started when you were what, 22? You've disappointed your parents... not enough for them to say anything but enough for them to talk about it with their friends. You're overweight, still pining after that girl you couldn't even approach in high school and now even jerking your pathetic dick is turning into a chore. For a while it seemed that going out and getting wasted every night was going to be your "thing," but you don't even do that anymore; not for any mature reason (like its obvious impact on your already-poor health) or the fact that its kind of lost its gonzo/rebel/palahniuk charm but rather because you're such an obnoxious drunk that people tend to get sick of you really quickly. You think you're Hemingway (or Heinlein, or Herbert, or Capote, or Bukowski) but really you're Harmon, without the wit. No one listens to your free-form podcast and your attempts to monetize your youtube channel have so far only garnered confused support from your aunt and Rodney, that rear end in a top hat from middle school who friend requests you ever time he realizes that you've dropped him from your friends list. what - you're expecting us to help with the speech you give yourself in front of the mirror every morning? ftfy i've got important podcasts to attend to
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Sep 27, 2014 22:42
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Please be from the E/N passive aggressively melt down about your friends online thread
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Sep 27, 2014 22:44
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IBurnStuffAlot posted:I get it, you are a loving grognard. You're too devoid of motivation to do anything with the college degree it took you almost 6 years to get. You are too smart to "get a job" but not smart enough to build the next Apple or Tesla in your garage. You can't seem to finish that novel you started when you were what, 22? You've disappointed your parents... not enough for them to say anything but enough for them to talk about it with their friends. You're overweight, still pining after that girl you couldn't even approach in high school and now even jerking your pathetic dick is turning into a chore. For a while it seemed that going out and getting wasted every night was going to be your "thing," but you don't even do that anymore; not for any mature reason (like its obvious impact on your already-poor health) or the fact that its kind of lost its gonzo/rebel/palahniuk charm but rather because you're such an obnoxious drunk that people tend to get sick of you really quickly. You think you're Hemingway (or Heinlein, or Herbert, or Capote, or Bukowski) but really you're Harmon, without the wit. No one listens to your free-form podcast and your attempts to monetize your youtube channel have so far only garnered confused support from your aunt and Rodney, that rear end in a top hat from middle school who friend requests you ever time he realizes that you've dropped him from your friends list. if henry rollins never got into lifting weights or writing stuff he would write this thread
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Sep 27, 2014 22:49
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gurrrl you aint know ME
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Sep 27, 2014 22:50
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Get back, motherfucker, you don't know me like dat
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Sep 27, 2014 22:53
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tl;dr I'll just assume your angry with life
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Sep 27, 2014 22:53
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Shouldn't you be posting this in EN?
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Sep 27, 2014 22:55
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IBurnStuffAlot posted:loving grognard also lol at gbs constantly using this word but having no clue what it actually means
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Sep 27, 2014 22:57
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op this is a staggering amount of projecting you're doing. do you need to talk about anything? are you okay
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Sep 27, 2014 23:00
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Going out and getting wasted requires me making contact with other humans and having friends. So yeah, waaaaaay off base here OP.
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Sep 27, 2014 23:04
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Stopped reading at grognard
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Sep 27, 2014 23:05
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EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A VHS INTO THE SLOT. ITS CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, RIDDICK. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN WHOOSHING SOUNDS WHEN I SLAM DOWN SOME NECRO BASTARDS OR EVEN WHEN I MESS UP TECHNIQUE. NOT MANY CAN SAY THEY ESCAPED THE GALAXY’S MOST DANGEROUS PRISON. I CAN. I SAY IT AND I SAY IT OUTLOUD EVERYDAY TO PEOPLE IN MY COLLEGE CLASS AND ALL THEY DO IS PROVE PEOPLE IN COLLEGE CLASS CAN STILL BE IMMATURE JERKS. AND IVE LEARNED ALL THE LINES AND IVE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE MYSELF AND MY APARTMENT LESS LONELY BY SHOUTING EM ALL. 2 HOURS INCLUDING WIND DOWN EVERY MORNING. THEN I LIFT
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Sep 27, 2014 23:06
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IBurnStuffAlot posted:You think you're Hemingway Parched, aching, bereft of motivation i awaken. The blue glow of a login screen prevents my immediate engagement with the vast nothingness of something unknown, awful. I am known, and in this moment i must speak. Im gay
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Sep 27, 2014 23:08
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IBurnStuffAlot posted:I get it, you are a loving grognard. You're too devoid of motivation to do anything with the college degree it took you almost 6 years to get. You are too smart to "get a job" but not smart enough to build the next Apple or Tesla in your garage. You can't seem to finish that novel you started when you were what, 22? You've disappointed your parents... not enough for them to say anything but enough for them to talk about it with their friends. You're overweight, still pining after that girl you couldn't even approach in high school and now even jerking your pathetic dick is turning into a chore. For a while it seemed that going out and getting wasted every night was going to be your "thing," but you don't even do that anymore; not for any mature reason (like its obvious impact on your already-poor health) or the fact that its kind of lost its gonzo/rebel/palahniuk charm but rather because you're such an obnoxious drunk that people tend to get sick of you really quickly. You think you're Hemingway (or Heinlein, or Herbert, or Capote, or Bukowski) but really you're Harmon, without the wit. No one listens to your free-form podcast and your attempts to monetize your youtube channel have so far only garnered confused support from your aunt and Rodney, that rear end in a top hat from middle school who friend requests you ever time he realizes that you've dropped him from your friends list. Nice projecting
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Sep 27, 2014 23:09
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IBurnStuffAlot posted:I get it, you are a loving grognard. You're too devoid of motivation to do anything with the college degree it took you almost 6 years to get. You are too smart to "get a job" but not smart enough to build the next Apple or Tesla in your garage. You can't seem to finish that novel you started when you were what, 22? You've disappointed your parents... not enough for them to say anything but enough for them to talk about it with their friends. You're overweight, still pining after that girl you couldn't even approach in high school and now even jerking your pathetic dick is turning into a chore. For a while it seemed that going out and getting wasted every night was going to be your "thing," but you don't even do that anymore; not for any mature reason (like its obvious impact on your already-poor health) or the fact that its kind of lost its gonzo/rebel/palahniuk charm but rather because you're such an obnoxious drunk that people tend to get sick of you really quickly. You think you're Hemingway (or Heinlein, or Herbert, or Capote, or Bukowski) but really you're Harmon, without the wit. No one listens to your free-form podcast and your attempts to monetize your youtube channel have so far only garnered confused support from your aunt and Rodney, that rear end in a top hat from middle school who friend requests you ever time he realizes that you've dropped him from your friends list. actually i'm gay haha : p
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Sep 27, 2014 23:11
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you made it half sentence.
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Sep 27, 2014 23:12
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op, i know you your name is henry frinkleman, you have a dog and 2 dogs. your kids are named after the fab four, your wife's idea. you work at a security firm for big bussiness, 2 days a week, five to nine, 24/7. your favorite color is green, but only when you are happy, when you are not happy its yellow. you take the bus to work, its a greyhound. your boss is a lady, her name is sarah toons, and she is a toon from cool world. you want to have an affair with her, but you know that the one rule is that real people can't sleep with toons. your favorite baseball team is the boston red sox, but you don't watch baseball often, instead you are into esports. you have a rivalry with the dark lord lucifer.
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Sep 27, 2014 23:16
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tldr in the moooountains
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Sep 27, 2014 23:16
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Fatkraken posted:EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A VHS INTO THE SLOT. ITS CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, RIDDICK. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN WHOOSHING SOUNDS WHEN I SLAM DOWN SOME NECRO BASTARDS OR EVEN WHEN I MESS UP TECHNIQUE. NOT MANY CAN SAY THEY ESCAPED THE GALAXY’S MOST DANGEROUS PRISON. I CAN. I SAY IT AND I SAY IT OUTLOUD EVERYDAY TO PEOPLE IN MY COLLEGE CLASS AND ALL THEY DO IS PROVE PEOPLE IN COLLEGE CLASS CAN STILL BE IMMATURE JERKS. AND IVE LEARNED ALL THE LINES AND IVE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE MYSELF AND MY APARTMENT LESS LONELY BY SHOUTING EM ALL. 2 HOURS INCLUDING WIND DOWN EVERY MORNING. THEN I LIFT I always wondered what time this guy got up because he goes to college but still has time to watch a two hour movie and lift weights in the morning
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Sep 27, 2014 23:20
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U really fingered my butthole on this one op
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Sep 28, 2014 01:11
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IBurnStuffAlot posted:I get it, you are a loving grognard. You're too devoid of motivation to do anything with the college degree it took you almost 6 years to get. You are too smart to "get a job" but not smart enough to build the next Apple or Tesla in your garage. You can't seem to finish that novel you started when you were what, 22? You've disappointed your parents... not enough for them to say anything but enough for them to talk about it with their friends. You're overweight, still pining after that girl you couldn't even approach in high school and now even jerking your pathetic dick is turning into a chore. For a while it seemed that going out and getting wasted every night was going to be your "thing," but you don't even do that anymore; not for any mature reason (like its obvious impact on your already-poor health) or the fact that its kind of lost its gonzo/rebel/palahniuk charm but rather because you're such an obnoxious drunk that people tend to get sick of you really quickly. You think you're Hemingway (or Heinlein, or Herbert, or Capote, or Bukowski) but really you're Harmon, without the wit. No one listens to your free-form podcast and your attempts to monetize your youtube channel have so far only garnered confused support from your aunt and Rodney, that rear end in a top hat from middle school who friend requests you ever time he realizes that you've dropped him from your friends list. sounds like projection. YOu don't know me. I own a pool and a motorcycle. It owns.
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Sep 28, 2014 01:17
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I also talk about myself in the second person.
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Sep 28, 2014 01:19
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Sep 28, 2014 01:20
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mr.capps posted:op, i know you let's dancing
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Sep 28, 2014 01:21
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you don't know me man nobody knows me
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Sep 28, 2014 01:21
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better than i know myself it seems
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Sep 28, 2014 01:23
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Sep 28, 2014 01:23
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I know you. I see you on the street. I say good morning sometimes. Sometimes I don't. I know you. One time we talked about the weather for a good minute, minute-and-a-half. I said hi to your wife at the store. You're about, I don't know, you're pretty tall. Brown hair. Brown eyes. Black? No, brown. You've gotta be like... 30 I guess. I know you. I mean I don't really know you. But I can speculate. I bet you've got like... a job. And stress and stuff. There are things in your life that are good, and other things that are bad. I can't remember your name. I think it's Joe, might be James. Anyway, 5 inches cut, discreet, D/D free, can host. No fats no femmes.
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Sep 28, 2014 01:23
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Moridin920 posted:you don't know me man sit and spin is a ride u concocted for the one and only. many have entered, but few have won your affection. u are possibly suffering from a current drought though rain may come. perhaps u could benefit from rationing your assertiveness while practicing the art of being aloof, ね？
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Sep 28, 2014 01:25
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I know you. I walked with you once upon a dream.
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Sep 28, 2014 01:28
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